I'm Home
By Muirnin Cocan
Disclaimer: I neither own nor claim any other rights in the characters and other concepts created for Glee. I make no money, nor do I seek any commercial advantage from this work. As such it constitutes "Fair Use" as defined in 17 U.S.C. §107. FAIR USE " Copyright Disclaimer Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing. Non-profit, educational or personal use tips the balance in favor of fair use."
Glee belongs to the powers that be - RIB (Ryan Murphy, Ian Brennan, & Brad Falchuk) oh and Fox …
Author's Note: Well this is another story that has suddenly smacked me upside the head … it's a future fic … yes it's of course Hummelberry as I see it … I had to start writing it down because it was really interferring with my other stories … I will get more chapters out for the others stories as soon as I can seeing as my work schedule is changing again … but I just had to address this story first … like I said it was like a big ol' baseball bat that was power smacking me on top of the noggin' and not apologizing for it … basically the story is Rachel Berry is going home to Lima Ohio to become the new Musical Director for the William McKinley High Music department … namely she will be teaching the New Directions …
Chapter 01 - Going Back Lima, Ohio – July 2034
After spending more than 20 years playing some of the most beloved roles on Broadway … Rachel Barbra Berry had finally made a decision that was going to shake up the Great White Way …
Even the soul strengthening that all of the emotional upheaval that had plagued her in the last year hadn't swayed her into doing what she was doing now … her name and image … were now going to be a thing of the past … no longer were they going to be up there shining down on some massive marquee of some of the most iconic Theaters that had ever graced Broadway ... playing the iconic roles that others had only dreamed of couldn't deminish nor change her mind …
She was going back home … to the land of her youth … She was going back home to Lima.
If she had to lay a finger on the turning point for her life it probably started when she had received word that her beloved fathers LeRoy and Hiram Berry had been killed in a tragic multi car pile up that took so many lives … however that didn't prompt her to come home as she had ignored the pleas from friends to come home … claiming she was too busy …
But … like all good things in life ... there was one inescapable prospect … she was lonely … Lonlier than she had ever been in all the years since High School ...
She had once said that Being part of something special MAKES you special ...
Well the last time she had felt that special was years ago when she was a member of a cover band called Pamela Lansbury ... and before that it was when she was in Lima, Ohio ... as part of the New Directions ...
The last time she had stepped foot in Lima had been 16 years before when she was best woman at the nuptials for her best friend Kurt Hummel to his longtime partner Blaine Anderson ...
She loved those men so much that when Kurt asked she had nor problem when she had given them one of her eggs so that they could have a child together ... much like her own mother did for her fathers ... however … because of the amount of time it would have taken … she did not carry the child like Shelby had for her dads …
Oh her dads … She missed her Fathers ... they had been traveling back from one of their date nights in Cleveland when the tragedy struck … a massive car accident that had taken the lives of 23 individuals ... She only found out about the accident when she received a phone call from Burt Hummel … and although it took her a year to do it … their deaths was the final catalyst that she had finally make up her mind and decide it was time to come home ...
After contacting the principal at William McKinley High School … she submitted her application to become the new department head for their Music Department ... it had been 12 years since any of their Glee Clubs had made it back to Nationals.
It was a long shot since even though she did have her college credentials along with a teaching certificate that was needed for some classes she taught at NYADA for Carmen … she had no experience in teaching at the High School Level … but like Shelby she had that certificate of Teaching …
Her biggest surprise had been when she was contacted by the Principal and invited to a meet and greet ... and found that the Principal was still the formidable and aged Sue Sylvester.
"Miss Berry, it is an honor to have you gracing our hallways once again." Sue had said upon shaking her hand. Gone were the track suits and in its place were skirt and blouse … like the position called for.
"I'm surprised that you are still here ... I would have thought you had retired a few years ago ..." Rachel responded with a smile "I have to say it is nice to see a familiar face."
"Well my daughter Robyn graduated from here 3 years ago and she is currently studying at Ohio State ... she plans on being a pediatrican of all things."
"Oh you must be so proud ... is that her?" pointing to the picture on the desk "She's lovely ... splitting image of a young Sue Sylvester."
"Well Rachel ... I can call you Rachel right?" she nodded "despite my apparent joy at terrorizing the Glee Club … sad to say that when William and Emma left a few years ago, we were lucky to have a couple of kids who could keep up the challenges of the New Directions but they just didn't have the fire that was evident back when you were here ... you guys were really good … I had hoped ... well it still upsets me that Finn is no longer with us ..."
"I think about him ever day ... it's part of why I am here ... I've made my mark on Broadway ... so now I've come home ... and I am dedicating my teaching career to Finn ... hoping to be the type of teacher he would have been ..." Rachel said trying desperately to not cry.
"Well … yes … I am sure you will be and we are more than delighted to welcome you to the staff ..." Sue said.
"I got the job? Really? Oh wow … Thank you Principal Sylvester" Rachel said happily as she began giving Rachel the outline of the rules and regulations that she would need to follow come September.
Thanking Sue, Rachel left and went to the Choir room ... still in the same place and found the picture of Finn still gracing the walls after all these years ...
"I'm home sweetheart ... I'll make you proud of me ... I do still love you very much ..." she said as she kissed the tips of her fingers and pressed them against the picture she had given to the glee club after Finn had died so many years before.
A few days later she was driving and saw the sign for Hummel Tire & Lube ... she smiled and thought she would pop in and say hello to Burt ... Let him know that she had finally taken his advise and come home … besides … she did need a lube on the car anyway. She pulled in and went to the office ...
"Rachel?" a familiar voice said from behind the counter.
"KURT!" Rachel responded racing around the counter and into his waiting arms "Oh my god ... I was just going to get a lube and say hi to your dad ... how are you!"
"I'm good ... the girls and I are getting ... well I heard about your dads ... unfortunately, I couldn't contact you then … my Blaine was also in that same accident that killed them ... so the girls and I are trying to get passed the grief."
"Oh Kurt I had no idea ... I know that losing him couldn't have been easy ... you said girls ... how many daughters do you have?"
"We had three ... the one thanks to you we named Barbra Rachele … Chele for short ... she is 15 years old now and going to be a sophmore at McKinley ... then the next one was thanks to Tina ... her name is Bethany Mercedes she's 14 a new freshman at McKinley … we call her Beth … and then the baby is all of 13 Anastacia Santana ... yeah Satan herself helped out on that one. Ana is very much like our old roommate in beauty and attitude" Kurt said as he pulled out the pictures from his wallet.
Looking at all three of the dark haired girls she could see that all three of them had the same beautiful glasz eyes that Kurt possessed. "Ah I can tell right now who fathered all of these girls … not like with my dads … I only know who my birth father was … because of a bloodtest … But Kurt your girls ... they are beautiful Kurt … absolutely gorgeous"
"Thank you ... it's a good thing that I wasn't a girl myself ... I would never have gotten pregnant ... it seems that Blaine was sterile so they are all mine." Kurt said sadly changing the subject "So, you came in to get some work done on your car?"
"Yeah ... I start teaching at McKinley in the fall and I really don't want to start work with a car that sounds like Mr Schue's did our first year." She laughed.
"Well we can't have that now can we ..." Kurt joked so happy to see his dear friend after so many years. "What are you doing for dinner tonight?"
"Its just me ... I inherited the old place so I moved back in to my Dads house and now I am just putting my life back together again." Rachel said ...
"Well we were having Dad and Carole over for dinner tonight ... why don't you come over ... it will give you a chance to officially meet Chele ... since she is biologically your daughter ..."
"Oh … I don't want to intrude ..." Rachel said suddenly fearful of meeting the daughter that she was genetically linked to.
"Nonsense ... She might even sing for you ..." Kurt said with a twinkle "Yes she has YOUR talent damn her ..." he laughed "She truly is like how you were in high school except she dresses to impress and not like a demented grandmother ... or a toddler … although sometimes she pushes it with the slutty barbie look …" He laughed.
"I'm never going to live that pantsuit down am I ..." Rachel asked
"Nor those hideous animal sweaters ... I still cringe when I think about them" Kurt said.
"This coming from the man who is wearing such a fashionably challenged attire of grease splattered coveralls ... but you do wear them well ... fine … I'll come to dinner ... do you want me to bring anything?" Rachel asked …
"I'll tell you what … I'll have the guys start on your car … I'll drive you back to your place and then when it's time for dinner I'll pick you up … how's that sound?" Kurt asked wanting to spend more time with his one time best friend. He had always held Rachel Berry in a special place in his heart … first because she was the love of his brother's life … second because she was at one time his best friend and biggest fan … and thirdly … she was the first girl … woman that he had ever said I love you to and meant it … He had never even said that to Mercedes and she had been his constant companion for a long time in their sophmore year at school.
"Sounds like a plan … I can't wait to meet the girls and I can't wait to see Burt and Carole again …" Rachel said as Kurt handed the clip board he had filled out the paperwork with to one of his mechanics. "Are you going to want veto power over my attire tonight?"
"Only consultation if you desire … you however … wow … you look wonderful dressed just the way you are …" Kurt said approving of the simple grey dress and black pumps that she wore.
"I did try to learn from your teachings Kurt" She said as she stepped into the blue Chevrolet sedan. She watched as Kurt shed the coveralls revealing a nice white buttoned down shirt and black slacks that were underneath. "Ah so that's how you do it … nice quick change …"
"And look no grease on the hands either" Kurt said showing her his hands "I used latex gloves for all the messy work …"
She noticed the platinum and yellow gold wedding band that adorned the left ring finger of Kurt's hand and she subconsciously played with the ring that Finn had given her their senior year of high school that she still wore after all these years … she had begun wearing it full time after she had been left alone living in the loft in Bushwick as a connection to the life she should have had.
The drive as quiet for the most part … "So mind if I ask whose the lucky guy?" Kurt asked as he motored along the road towards the Berry residence.
"What do you mean lucky guy?" Rachel asked confused by the question.
"You are playing with an engagement ring … so did you get engaged while you were in New York? I mean I know it's been a lot of years since we have seen each other …" Kurt said.
"Oh … oh sorry … no … what you don't recognize this? This is the ring your brother gave me in our senior year of high school … I started to wear it all the time after you guys all left Bushwick … Never had a reason not to wear it …" Rachel said apprehensively.
"I know this is sort of a personal question Rachel … but … did you ever date again after Finn died?" Kurt asked as delicately as he could.
"Um … not really I had a couple of dinner dates with producers and such but no one special … its sort of why I came back home … other than our band … this was the last place that I felt really special … and I figured teaching the Glee Club would be a way of being a part of something special … I mean you and I we were part of something special … but I never had that again with anyone not even when Jesse came to New York … he wanted to start things up again and I just couldn't …" Rachel said as tears started to well in her eyes Kurt saw that and reached over and held her hand.
"You have always been special Rachel … remember … you are amazing … and I can't wait to see what you do with the new New Directions …" Kurt said.
"Thanks … um I didn't mean to sound like I was feeling sorry for myself … I've had a good life … Great life by some standards … I've won Tony's for Funny Girl, Evita and Carousel got nominated for Wicked and the revamp of Best Little Whorehouse in Texas … I got 3 Grammy's and an Oscar for best song for a motion picture … it only took me 16 years to acheive my EGOT when I got the Emmy for my guest appearance on Are You Being Served USA … So I have no complaints …" Rachel said nostalgically.
"I remember … Cedes got a bit ticked off seeing as she was up for the best song category the same year you were … Her response was 'Of course the DIVA got it' …" Kurt laughed.
"So you still in contact with Mercedes and the rest of the gang?" Rachel asked curiosity getting the better of her.
"Most of them … I see Puck when he comes to town when he is on Leave … he's still in the Air Force … he's a Sergeant Major now … Quinn got her law degree from Yale … she's practicing in Cleveland so she comes back to town once in awhile … Santana and Dani are still together after 20 years and have made a home for themselves here as well … after Tana's Abuela died, she came back and didn't want to leave again … especially when her Abuela left Santana everything … with no word of apology or anything … Artie and Kitty are living in Los Angeles not far from Mercedes … Artie got the surgery that he needed and although he needs to use a cane he is walking and when Kitty is really being strong he dances too …
"Mike and Tina got married for the third time last year … they are living in Chicago … Sam moved to Massachusetts where he and Brittany finally got married for real about 10 years ago … he's still modeling and she is still doing work at MIT …" Kurt said giving updates on everyone he could think of … "Unique finally had the surgery and she is having a great time actually being a girl now … She actually teaches at Carmel … the director of Vocal Adrenaline …"
"No … Oh nothing like knowing the competition … this is worse than when my mother was in charge of them …" Rachel grimaced.
"Oh you will be fine … it's not like it was when we started we only had the five of us until Finn … last year they actually had 28 kids in New Directions … and some of them actually could sing …" Kurt laughed.
"Well they will be able to sing … if I have my say about it … I'm going to need to go over music and then I'm also teaching Music Theory as well … so I have to come up with a lesson plan … It's all rather exciting I think …" Rachel said trying to sound optimistic.
"I know Chele will be so excited to have her mom here to teach her … and yes she does think of you as her mom …" Kurt said "When we have talked about you … I have always referred to you as her mom … she even has a scrapbook dedicated to all the clippings she could find about you …"
"Really? Oh wow … that's I mean Shelby started doing clippings about me when I was doing Fanny but … wow … Kurt thank you … my dads never told me anything about my mom … to know that Chele knows about me … Thank you Kurt … that makes me feel even better … what about her sisters … won't they be jealous?" Rachel asked.
"No … each of the girls have their own relationship with their mom's … at least those that had donated the eggs … the surrogates have nothing to do with the girls … they were just the vessels that the girls were grown in … not like Shelby … she donated the egg and carried you … then actually gave birth to you …" Kurt said as he pulled into the Berry's driveway. "The old house still looks the same …"
"Yeah … its as old inside as it is outside I'm afraid … would you like to come in for a drink?" Rachel asked.
"Sure that would be wonderful … I've missed talking to you … we used to talk all the time after we came back to Lima … did you get a good price on the Loft or did you not sell it?" Kurt asked as he walked into the living room.
"I decided to lease it out … It will give me a good income coming in from New York and that goes directly into a savings account …" Rachel said.
"What on earth are you saving for?" Kurt asked as he took the glass of Iced tea that Rachel handed him.
"Um … well … you will think I'm crazy but … I want to have a child of my own … I'll be 40 in December and I'm trying to save up so that I can have a child … sort of like Sue did … she waited to have a child later in life and now I want one as well …" Rachel said blushing slightly.
"That's wonderful Rachel … I think you will be a wonderful mother …" Kurt responded.
"So do you still sing Kurt?" Rachel asked trying to change the subject.
"Not so much anymore since Blaine died … I have been known to practice scales with the girls … I learned to play the piano thanks to my husband … he also taught me how to play the guitar …" Kurt said as he looked over at the grand piano that graced the Berry living room. "Why don't you sing something for me …"
"Only if it's with you …" Rachel said as she handed him a piece of music "Do you know this one?"
"Ah … Going Back … written by one Carole King and performed by one Phil Collins … I think I can clunk my way through this …" Kurt said as he began to play the opening bars of the song. Slowly Rachel started doing the oohs to start the song.
Rachel:
I think I'm going back
To the thing I learned so well in my youth
Kurt:
I think I'm returning to
All those days when I was young enough to know the truth
Both:
Now there are no games to only pass the time
No more electric trains no more trees to climb
Thinking young and growing older is no sin
And I can play the game of life to win
Rachel:
I can recall the time when
I wasn't ashamed to reach out to a friend
Kurt:
And now I think I've got a lot more than
Just my toys to lend
Both:
Now there's more to do than watch my sailboat glide
And everyday can be my magic paradise
I can play hide and seek with my fears
And live my days instead of counting my years
Both:
Let everyone debate the true reality
I'd rather see my world the way it used to be
A little bit of courage is all we lack
So catch me if you can 'cause I'm going back
Rachel:
I'm going back
Not just sitting, walking away
Kurt:
Yes, I'm going back
Going back to my youth
Both:
Come on, catch me 'cause I'm going back
I'm going back
"Oh Kurt that was marvelous … I haven't had a duet partner that would sing that well with me in years … well … since you!" Rachel squealed "You will have to come sing with me again more often!"
"That did sound great …" Kurt hugged her again "I've missed you Rachel … I mean I really have missed you." Kurt said "Listen I will be back at half past five to pick you up … dinner is at 6 … What you are wearing is wonderful or you can just wear jeans and a tee-shirt … I've sort of grown out of the fashion snobbery …" He said as he gave her another hug this time included a kiss on the cheek then turned and left a gobsmacked Rachel watching him walk out her front door.
'Now I understand that look he had on his face when I had kissed his cheek all those years ago …' Rachel thought to herself … her heart racing a bit … shaking her head she turned to her office desk … she got her music text books out and started working out a class plan for Music Theory.
Time had passed slowly as she got the first three months done and heard the door bell ring as she began to work on the fourth month. Checking her watch she was shocked to see that it was time to go to Kurt's.
"Oh shit …" She looked down at the books and decided they would be fine where they were. Going to the front door she opened it saying "Sorry Kurt I was working on my class pl … aah" anything else she was going to say was completely cut off.
She was astonished by a small pair of arms wrapping around her neck and the squeal of "MOM!" as Chele hugged her mom for the very first time in her life.
Rachel's eyes opened wide as she saw Kurt laughing behind the dark haired teenager who was wrapped around Rachel.
"Sorry Rach … she heard you were coming to dinner and had to come with me and pick you up … Chele … let your mother breath" Kurt said with a chuckle.
"Oh … sorry mom … Hi … it's really great to see you … Daddy said you are going to be teaching at McKinley next year … I'm going to be a sophomore there next year … I really hope I make the New Directions … I love to sing …" Chele said very quickly and with so much enthusiasm that Rachel just looked at Kurt with a smile.
"It's great to see you too baby … Kurt … you were right … she is just like I was as a teenager … but her eyes are lovely …" she then wrinkled her nose "however she got my nose … Chele I am so sorry about that …" Rachel said.
"Hey! I love your nose Rachel!" Kurt said giving her nose a tweak like he did when they were kids.
"Well let me get my bag … unless you would like to take a look around Chele …" Rachel said
"Her Dads built an entire shrine to the star that is one Rachel Barbra Berry … down in the basement …" Kurt said.
"Really? I want to see!" Chele said excitedly.
"Alright, Kurt if you would like to lead the way …" Rachel said grabbing her purse and wrap … and headed down to the basement.
There lining the walls were picture after picture of Rachel at different performances all the way back from her high school days.
"Daddy is this you!" Chele called out. There on the wall was a picture taken at the end of their performance at Nationals in New York … right beside Rachel. Finn towered in the back and they all looked so happy.
"Oh I remember this … that was right after …" Kurt started to say then seeing the blush on Rachel's face he changed what he was going to say about the kiss that missed "we finished performing at Nationals in 2011 … that trip was amazing"
"Your daddy and I sang on a real Broadway stage for the very first time …" Rachel said as she stood next to Kurt looking at the picture.
"The weird thing is I had more fun on that trip to New York and getting 12th place at nationals than I did when we went to Chicago the next year and actually took first place …"
"That is weird … but everything changed after Chicago … Finn broke off our engagement and stuck me on that train to New York when I thought we were heading to our wedding …" Rachel remembered "But then you came to New York 2 months later and we spent a few years there in Bushwick together … with Santana and then Blaine …"
While Rachel and Kurt reminisced Chele walked around the room looking at pictures of the mother she had only heard about and the wonderful career she had on Broadway. She wanted to be just like her mother so badly … then stopped as she saw a picture of herself that she had no idea had been taken … she stayed silent about it … she knew after her Poppa had been killed how rough it was for her daddy to hear about him … she figured she would ask about the picture another time … "Mom you are amazing … I can't wait to learn what I can from you … so I can go to Broadway and be a star just like you" she said.
"Well you do have a few years left to go … why don't we go to see your grandparents and have dinner … I'm sure your sisters are anything like their mothers … they will be anxious as well …" Rachel said thinking about how impatient both Tina and Santana could be …
The trip to the Hummel-Anderson residence took no time at all and when Rachel walked into the living room she was greeted by Burt and Carole who treated her as a long lost daughter who had been missing for so many years.
"Oh honey … it's so good to see you again … we have missed you all these years …" Carole gushed.
"You look wonderful Rachel …" Burt said giving her a big bear hug that he had been famous for when he would show up at the loft in Bushwick.
"It's great to see you as well … I'm sorry I didn't come home more often … it was just difficult" Rachel said.
"Sweetheart … we understand … and he is always in our hearts as are your dads …" Burt said giving her a hug again.
She turned and saw two other girls who were standing to the side out of the way "Now … I know which one is which … you have got to be Beth?" as she acknowledged Bethany who nodded "So that makes you Ana …" who both gave her a hug in greeting. "Now I know that Chele is going to be a sophomore at McKinley next year so will you be a freshman Beth?"
"Yeah … I'm sort of scared but it will be fun now that we know that Chele's mom is teaching …"
"Well not to scare you both but I am a bit of a diva … you can ask your Daddy about that …" Rachel said with a grin. "I'll be more than happy to help any of you practice songs or just talk if you need to …"
"Really?" Ana asked "I don't get to go to McKinley for another year … the choir at the middle school sucks"
"Ana! Language …" Kurt scolded.
"Yes daddy …" Ana said.
Burt and Carole were already seated at the dining room table "Ladies why don't we take our seats so we can have supper …" Kurt said "You can sit here by me Rachel …"
Taking her seat she was surprised there was even vegan fare on the dinner menu. "I hope you didn't make anything special for me …"
"No … we have a girl who chose to be vegan a decade ago … and no it's not the one you think it is … Ana's our vegan" Kurt confessed.
"Really … well I have fallen off the wagon a couple of times over the years but I pretty much still am a vegan as well …" Rachel said.
Ana looked at her "What do you mean you've fallen off the wagon?"
"That you can blame your daddy on … he used to get these amazing cheesecakes in New York … even better than Breadstix has … and they unfortunately are not vegan … I did learn to make a cheesecake that was vegan and pretty comparable as well …" Rachel admitted.
"You will have to teach me how" Kurt said as they ate dinner.
The conversation included all three of the girls and also Burt and Carole … Kurt laughed and smiled all through the meal. After supper Burt asked to speak to Rachel for a bit …
"I have to say it's been nearly a year since the accident … and tonight was the first time that we have seen my son actually laugh or even give a true smile … you know he's got that fake smile that he will do to make you think he's smiling … but you just know he's not happy. You are the reason he started smiling again … Thank you Rachel." Burt said as he gave her a hug.
"Well he was there for me when we lost Finn … you know I haven't dated anyone since Finn died …" Rachel said.
"Any happiness that either you or Kurt … I don't want to see either of you alone … like I was for so many years after my Elisabeth died … Remember you are part of this family … you always have been and we are so very proud of you … both Carole and I … we have followed your career … we even snuck in a show or two when we were in New York for political business …"
"And you didn't say hello! Oh I wish I had known … I would have loved to see you …" said Rachel.
"I know honey … as I said it was for political business … I know it's not much of an excuse but you also were a huge reminder for Carole about Finn … it took her a number of years to be able to see you without breaking down in tears … She sometimes has said that if we had allowed you kids to get married so early … he might still be with us …" admitted Burt.
"I would love to think so … but as tragic as his death was … nothing would have stopped it from happening … I'm just glad that your cancer was cured so you have so many more years to be with us … and I am actually glad to finally get to see Kurt's girls … they are wonderful." Rachel said.
"They definitely are … Rachel … Kurt needs you in his life … since Blaine's death … he's been a shadow of his former self … please help him anyway you can …" Burt asked.
"I promise Burt I will do everything I can to help him … like he helped me with Finn … it's because of Kurt that I actually was able to keep performing after Finn died … I even wasn't going to join Pamela Lansbury … kept using Finn or Funny Girl as my escape clause … but Kurt kept pushing … and I spent a number of years performing with him …" Rachel promised.
"That's all I can ask …" Burt said giving the woman he had one time thought of as a daughter – in – law for his step son another hug. "well we better get back out there."
"Yeah I do need to get going soon … I'm actually working on my lesson plans for my Musical Theory classes … I might need to get the girls to help me with the songs for the New Directions … I hate to say I am not as up to date on the newer groups …" Rachel commented.
"Well I look forward to see your performances … I know that you guys did fantastically when you did older songs … so you may want to think of some of the classics …" Burt said as he lead her back out to where the rest of the family was located at …
"That's a distinct possibility … although thinking about it … what was brand new for us in school is no the classics today … I was also thinking of some of the Broadway showstoppers …" Rachel said.
"Mom?" Chele asked
"Yes honey?" Rachel responded automatically … still not quite used to hearing the word Mom referred to her.
"Daddy said it's alright if I ask you if I can stay over with you tonight … or if you want we can have a slumber party here tonight?" Chele said quickly hoping that she could spend more time with her mother.
"He did huh … well let me go talk to your daddy real quick and then I will let you know … Kurt …" using the voice that he had not heard in so many years … the one that was trying very hard to not laugh but trying to be serious as well …
"Oh dear I am in trouble now …" Kurt said jokingly "Let's take this into the other room … too many little ears around … if you know what I mean."
"How about outside?" Rachel recommended.
Since it was a nice evening out they decided to actually take a walk around the block … Kurt had taken her hand like he had so many years before when they would walk around the streets of Manhattan or even in Bushwick … "That girl has me wrapped around her finger … I couldn't say no to Chele so if you want to let her stay over that's up to you … or if you want you can stay here and spend time with all three of the girls …" Kurt said hopefully … "I've really missed you Rachel … I mean really missed you …"
"Kurt … I've missed you too … after you and Blaine left New York I was lost for a bit but remembered what you had always told me after Finn died you said that he wouldn't want me to put my life on hold … I figured that would go double for you … I'll tell you what … Chele can come stay the night at my house … she can even have my old room …"
"Does it still look like Hollie Hobby and Strawberry Shortcake had gone to hook up?" Kurt asked
"Oh shut up … I was 15 … it just didn't seem like it needed to be updated since I left so soon after high school … and yes it looks exactly the same." Rachel scolded.
Walking back to the house hand in hand … Rachel felt the familiarity and comfort that had been missing for so long … she mentally shook the thoughts out of her head … he was her best gay … she didn't need to start thinking about him romantically … it was foolhardy to do so …
"OK Chele … go get your over night bag … we will be going to my house tonight … Ana … Beth … tonight is for Chele … we can have an all girls night sometime this summer … I even have a stage in my basement … so I can teach you all about theatricality …" Rachel proudly announced.
The squeals of joy that resounded about the room caused Kurt to burst out laughing as he hugged Rachel. "Thanks Rach … the girls needed this …"
"You can even come if you want when the rest of the girls come for the night … it would be like old times with Mercedes and the two of us … watching Twilight and eating soy ice cream …"
"Daddy you had slumber parties at Moms?" Chele asked as she bounded into the room with her bag.
"That was a long time ago … but yes …" Kurt admitted.
"You both have a fun time" Burt said as he opened the front door to help Rachel out.
"Call if you need anything Rachel … or even if you don't …" Kurt said
"I will … we will be fine." Rachel said as she and her daughter got into her car that Kurt had brought back to his house from the shop. She mentally reminded herself she needed to find out how much she owed him.
The drive back to her house was interesting as Chele was rather quiet on the way. Once back into the house Rachel finally sat down on the sofa with her daughter and started the conversation … "OK, sweetheart I know that I don't know you very well … but you are very like me when I was your age … so I gotta ask … Chele why are you being so quiet?"
"I'm just thinking …"
"About what?"
"Did you know that Daddy told me a few years ago that there was only one other person he would have wanted to spend his life with other than Poppa … and that was you …"
"Oh I am sure you misunderstood him … I mean sweetheart your daddy is gay … and besides he was very much in love with Blaine … er … your Poppa …" Rachel explained.
"Yeah … I know Daddy is gay but he said that there was only one woman in his life he was ever in love with and that was you … He said that if Poppa had not gotten back together with him after they broke up … he would have spent the rest of his life loving you …" Chele quoted then asked "Were you ever in love with my daddy?"
"Oh sweetheart … that's a difficult question … I have loved your daddy for a big chunk of my life … at least since I was 16 or 17 … was I ever in love with him … I … OK, true confession time … yes I was in love with him … but I had to get that feeling out of my heart and mind … because he was in love with Blaine and also because he was gay …"
"How long was this after Uncle Finn passed away …" Chele asked.
"About a year I guess … I figured I had latched on to Kurt emotionally because I was still grieving for your Uncle Finn … you do know that I was engaged to your Uncle Finn right? We were there ready to exchange vows … wedding dress and all … when we heard about a friend of ours got into an accident. We moved to New York City and your Daddy became engaged to your Poppa … I was performing in Funny Girl … Aunties Tana and Dani were working at the Spotlight Diner … we were just surviving … then both your Daddy and I got invited to sing at the Winter Showcase at NYADA … and Madam Carmen Tibideaux asked us both to sing solos but also to do a duet … so we did 'Defying Gravity' … that was the first song that we had sung sort of together … we actually did it as a Diva off at McKinley … but later on we sang it as a duet together … It was amazing …" Rachel reminisced "For the first time they gave the award for the Winter Showcase to the pair of us rather than just one … I remember I wanted so badly to fall into his arms and kiss him … like your Uncle Finn had done to me a few years before at nationals … but then Blaine came up and I remembered my place in their lives …"
"So you never got the chance to find out that Daddy loved you back?"
"Oh honey … I knew your daddy loved me … he showed me ever day just how much … like when I had just choked on my audition for NYADA … your Daddy came up to me and hugged me then said I love you Rachel Berry …"
"What did you say?" Chele asked hopefully … she like many people whose parents weren't together had hope in their hearts.
"I love you too" Rachel replied reliving the emotions of that traumatic time.
"So you and daddy love each other" Chele said confirming her suspicions.
"And remember what I said … Daddy is gay … mom is not male … besides …"
"Besides what? You guys love each other … did you know that since Poppa died … daddy hasn't laughed or smiled or anything? Not until you came back to him … I agree with Ana … you and Daddy need to get together …" Chele stated.
"Whoa … where is this coming from …" her cell phone alerted her to a text message coming in … from Kurt … "Chele … I need to take this … why don't you go check out your bedroom … it's up the stairs, first one on the left … I'm not sure what all my dads have left in there … but I think it's the same way I left it …"
Going into the other room she looked at the text
Kurt: What the hell is going on? I am getting bombarded by the girls
Rachel quickly texted back
Rachel: I wish I knew … I was going to call you! Call me
The phone rang very quickly after that … answering quickly "Hi Kurt … apparently your girls have decided that you and I would be perfect for each other …"
"Hi Rach … I am so sorry … I didn't think they would pull these kind of games …"
"It's alright Kurt … I guess with everything that has happened over the last year for you … they noticed big changes in you … like you haven't smiled or laughed like you used to … and seeing me brought a lot of the old Kurt out … at least that's what both Burt and Chele have implied." Rachel responded.
"Listen, my folks are still here … I'm going to ask them to watch the girls … I want to come over and talk with you about all of this … is that alright?" Kurt asked feeling that what they needed to talk about was best done face to face.
"Um, yeah sure … Chele's up in my old room … probably snooping ... into my past I'll put some coffee on and we can have a good ol' chat like we used to …" Rachel said.
"I'll bring some soy ice cream … Peanut Butter Zig Zag still your favorite?" Kurt asked.
"You remembered … yes … I'll see you in a bit …" Rachel replied ending the call …
After putting on the pot of coffee she headed upstairs where she found Chele looking through her desk … "Find anything neat?" she asked startling her daughter.
"Oh mom! Yeah there's a lot of pictures here and an old laptop and what's this thing it looks strange" Chele asked
"That strange thing is an old video recorder that I used to use to upload videos to an old website called MySpace … and that thing next to it is the tripod for the camera … I thought we got rid of that old laptop … Oh well … anyway … Kurt's on his way over to talk to me …" Rachel said.
"Is this about what we were talking about?" Chele asked
"Partially … apparently your sisters have been bombarding your daddy … this isn't Fiddler on the Roof … you guys can't go playing matchmaker … Remember … your daddy is my best friend …"
"I know Mom but daddy needs someone to love … so one to love him … he needs you!" Chele said … "We figured it all out … Ana's mom has Auntie Dani and Beth's mom is married to Mike … but you are alone too … you need to be loved and daddy needs to be loved … you would be perfect for each other."
"Enough … Like I said Kurt's on his way over … he and I need to have a very deep discussion … but that will be after you have gone to bed … because that is not a discussion that I'm comfortable having you listen into … now if necessary we can always take you back to your place and let your grandparent's watch you …" Rachel said frankly.
"No, I'll be good … I already know how this is going to go … you guys are going to deny how you feel and you are going to be miserable except when you are together …" Chele said confidently.
"Oh is that so …" hearing the door bell "That will be your daddy … do you want to answer the door?"
Chele jumped up and ran down the stairs and pulled open the door … Standing there was Burt, Carole, Kurt, Beth and Ana "YAY! The whole family's here"
"Not that I don't mind seeing you all but what is going on?" Rachel asked completely confused.
"Dad and Carole seem to think that you and I need to go out tonight … I think they have been conspiring with Beth and Ana …" Kurt said looking completely shocked at the conspiracy in play.
"What do you want to do Kurt?" Rachel asked knowing that any time she spent with her glasz eyed friend would be welcomed.
"I was hoping for a quiet night … but obviously that's changed." Kurt said
Burt cleared his throat "Chele why don't you go get that bag you packed to come to your mother's place … you and your sisters will go back to our house and we will have a slumber party at the grands house … hows that sound … Give your parent's some time to talk … That way you two can stay here and … talk … "
Rachel and Kurt looked at each other wondering who really instigated this conspiracy.
Chele along with Beth and Ana ran up the stairs to 'Chele's Bedroom' …
"Dad … what is going on?" Kurt asked Burt after the girls disappeared up the stairs.
"Nothing … its just been a long time since the pair of you spent any time together so … Carole and I are giving you tonight … spend time … watch movies … talk … sing … whatever it is you kids do these days …" Burt said.
"We're ready Grampa!" Ana shouted as she came down the stairs with Beth and Chele following behind hiding her bag from her parent's view.
All three girls came over and hugged both Kurt and Rachel then disappeared out the door just as quick.
"I think Chele stuck something out of my old bedroom …" Rachel said as she ran up the stairs to confirm … "yup she took my old laptop and the old video recorder with the tripod …"
"They took my car …" Kurt said in shock. "What the hell is going on?"
"I haven't got a clue … but I must say that this is the most excitement that I have experienced in years …" Rachel commented "How about that coffee …"
"Bless you … I could use it …" Kurt said as he took a seat on the sofa then watched Rachel set out the coffee mugs and some cookies on the table in front of the sofa. After pouring them both a cup she sat down next to where Kurt was on the sofa … so he continued with the topic at hand "So what did you and Chele talk about exactly."
"She told me some secrets about you … that apparently you had told her … about how you felt about me …" confessed Rachel taking a sip of her coffee.
'Oh dear …' Kurt thought "Like what exactly …" he said hesitantly …
'He's going to make me say it' Rachel thought she set her mug on the coaster and then focused on his face watching the reaction he might have "That I am the only woman that you have ever been in love with" she had said it all very quickly … treating it like a bandage that gets ripped off of a skinned knee … do it fast enough and it won't hurt as much.
Kurt's head hung down "You were never supposed to find out about that …"
"Kurt look at me … why didn't you say anything? I purposely avoided those types of feelings for you as I didn't want to get hurt again … those feelings for you … they would have been unproductive … because of Finn … and Blaine … but I don't understand … why wouldn't you tell me …" Rachel desparately asked and seeing the longing in his eyes she realized that he was as lonely as she was.
"You're right … it would have been unproductive … I knew I was in love with Blaine … but when we were living together … when Blaine and I had broken up … it was basically you and me in the loft … well Satan was there but except for when you broke into my bedroom to put my hand in water and saw Bruce …" Kurt said "We really did everything together … we even got tattoos together … and yes I do know you really do have one that says Finn …"
"I'm almost afraid to ask how you know that … I don't think I've been naked in front of you …" Rachel suddenly curious as to how he knew.
"I saw it when we were sun bathing on the roof that summer before Blaine moved in … You had been laying on the chaise with your top untied … I came out and startled you …"
"Oh yeah I forgot about that … you actually saw and didn't say anything?" Rachel remembered she had flashed Kurt but had covered up quickly enough …
"Well it was a very memorable sight … you are beautiful Rachel … even after all these years you are still stunning." Kurt admitted with a smile. "Do you want to know the real reason why Blaine and I moved out?"
"I'm almost afraid to ask …" Rachel said.
"Because Blaine was afraid that he was losing me to you … he knew I was in love with you and thought that if we stayed around the loft … he would lose out … I was in denial … both for my feelings for you as well as … the problems that he and I were having" admitted Kurt "We made a deal that if I moved back to Ohio with him then he would allow me to ask you to be my best woman at the wedding … asking for your help with having Chele was the absolutely last thing he would allow me to do regarding you …"
Rachel sat in shock at this confession … she knew that after she had donated her egg to the guys that she had literally stopped hearing from them … but then she got busy with different productions and stopped wondering what happened.
"I'm sorry if I ever caused any issues in your marriage Kurt …" Rachel said tears in her eyes.
"It wasn't your fault … trust me on this … Blaine and I were very good at hiding most of our marital issues … but we had resolved to not do anything about it until the girls were graduated and out of the house … yes it had gotten that bad …" Kurt then looked at Rachel "Now, I need to know what did you tell Chele when she asked you about your feelings for me …"
"The truth … that I still to this day still love you … that's the reason why I didn't date anyone … I couldn't allow my heart to be broken again …" Rachel said as the tears that had formed in her eyes started to drop down her cheeks.
Kurt reached out and pulled her into a hug "I'm so sorry you have felt that way … that I broke your heart"
"What a pair we've become … huh?
"To be honest I think we were inevitable … the happiest moment in my life was when you walked into the shop today … I didn't think I would ever see you again … I suppose I have spoiled Chele because she is sooo much like you used to be … but she is kinder and gentler than you tended to be at 15 … Beth was always Blaine's little girl … mainly because she was Tina's daughter … Ana has been the lone wolf … I guess that's why she has been so rebellious … she has been able to spend more time with her mom than either of the others and actually Tana's Abuela did see Ana before Santana did … I personally think that's why Abuela left everything to Santana … because of Ana."
"So where does that leave us?" Rachel asked.
"Usually we would start with dating … but that's usually reserved for getting to know the other person … we already know each other pretty well … I mean even after all these years apart … it's like we haven't been apart … although you are a bit more reserved than you were 20 years ago …" Kurt mentioned.
"Well, I'm getting old …" Rachel smirked.
"I'm older than you … I've already hit 40 … I've survived … you will too!" he laughed.
"This is probably true … I'd like to date you … but just doing this … sitting, cuddling and talking works good as well …" she said as she leaned into his shoulder.
"I have missed this … really missed this … we used to sit and watch musicals and just veg out in front of the TV …" Kurt turned and looked at her … really looked and then dropped his gaze down to her lips …
Rachel saw the look and felt her heart begin to pound in her chest … not wanting to do anything to ruin the moment but so wanting to be closer to this man who had control of her heart for so many years. Her lips parted slightly …
Who moved first neither could tell as they began a kiss that felt like it was on fire and they continued to fuel the flames of the desire that they felt …
Both were breathing heavy as they broke the kiss and stared at each other "I want you Rachel … I want to make love to you …" Kurt confessed to her
Rachel nodded and taking his hand lead him up the stairs to the master bedroom … when she had moved back in she had taken over her fathers' bedroom and redecorated to her tastes … still simple but more her.
In the hallway in front of the door to her room Kurt picked her up and carried her over to the bed.
"I'll warn you … it's been awhile for me … not since Finn" Rachel said looking at Kurt with eyes so full of love.
"What about Brody? He was living with us …" Kurt asked.
"After Finn, I sort of came up with all kinds of excuses … then there was the pregnancy scare … then Santana finding out about him being a gigolo …" the look on Kurt's face told her she had said something he didn't know about …
"What pregnancy scare?" Kurt asked as they curled up next to each other on the bed …
"About a month after we came home from the wedding that wasn't … I ah … had missed my period and took a home pregnancy test … it came back positive …" Rachel said.
"Rachel … why didn't I know about this … you didn't …" Kurt stared at her …
"Santana … she found it thrown away in the waste basket wrapped in tissue … she went with me to the doctors and there we found it was a false positive … I got my period about two weeks later after Brody was history …" Rachel admitted "I couldn't … wouldn't ever have gotten rid of any baby I was carrying … and it would have been Finn's … just so you know … he and I sort of forgot …"
"Speaking of which … do you want to use protection? I know you are wanting a baby … but I didn't want to presume …" Kurt asked "Also, I don't really have to warn you cause you probably already know but … I've never been with a woman before …"
Rachel leaned up and kissed Kurt on the lips … "Thanks for asking … but now we don't need to … unless you have some sort of STD that I don't know about … I'm kidding … I would be honored to have child with you … that we were active participants this time …"
"That makes two of us … I was going to offer my help in being a donor for you this time … but yeah I think being active participants … well lets see how this goes …"
Author's additional notes: I'm not going to go into detail about any type of sexual relations that the two have … I have abandoned any 12-step program for my addiction to reviews and being a review whore and so … I beg of you … please feed my addiction … You all are the best … So be constructive … throw out ideas … thanks for reading it and remember …
FEED MY ADDICTION! The box is right here …
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