Scene One: When Krabs go mad...
Narrator: It was a dark and stormy night, bwaahahahaa!!! .... *coughs* Ahem.. I mean.. It was a bright and sunny day in Bikini Bottom, as Spongebob enjoyed frying his krabby patties at the Krusty Crab. A fine eating establishment I might add... Though it does lack that certain something... Aha! It's the cashier, Mr. Tentacles! He never smiles!
Squidward: *wakes up from a nap* [bored voice] Hmm? Where you talking to me...?
Narrator: See what I mean?! *achieves a glare from the writer* Sorry sorry, I'll go on! Ahem... Anyhow, like I was saying... Spongebob was frying krabby patties, Squidward was... sleeping. And Mr. Krabs was counting his money, of course, when suddenly...
CRASH. BANG. THUNK.
Mr Krabs: *rushes out of his office* Was that me money vault being opened?!
Squidward: *exasperated sigh, a pause, then an evil grin* Why.. YES, Mr. Krabs.. It was your vault being opened.. someone just came in and took ALL your precious MONEY...
Mr Krabs: *eyes buldge out* What?! Noooo!!! Not me precious money! All those pennies and nickels, dimes and quarters, ones and fives, tens and twenties.. fifties and hundreds! Ahhhhhh!!! *rips off eyes*
Squidward: *blinks* Uhhhh....
Mr Krabs: *slaps his eyes against the floorboards, before running around the restuarant*
Squidward: .....
Spongebob pushes open the kitchen door, a spatula in his hand
Spongebob: What's wrong with Mr Krabs?
Narrator: *puts on a nasally, bored voice and tries to imitate Squid* He thinks his precious money was stolen.. how pathetic...
Squidward: *glares at Narrator* I'M Squidward, not YOU...
Narrator: *reverts back to normal voice* Oh right.. sorry.. *a pause, and then..* But it's just so BORING being the narrator.. I mean, I get to talk what.. twice in the whole story? It's not fair! I want to play Squidward! He's my idol.. *shiny eyes*
Squidward: Uhhhh... that's.. nice?
Writer Andri: *smacks Narrator with a trout* This isn't in the script, dummies!
Narrator: Ouch! *rubs head* Fine... sorry... continue on without me, everyone.. *sulks*
Spongebob: [whispers] Squid.. you aren't supposed to talk to the Narrator yet.. We don't know he's there...
Narrator: *whimper*
Squidward: *sighs and rolls his eyes, going back to reading a magazine*
Narrator: Hey! I didn't say he was reading a magazine! I said he was sleeping! How can he go BACK to reading a magazine if he wasn't reading one in the first place?!
Spongebob: *twitches* [whispers to anyone and everyone] Can I talk to the narrator now?
Andri: *glare* No, you can't talk to the narrator yet! *looks around* And where the [dolphin sound] is Mr Krabs?!
Spongebob: *overly dramatic gasp* Oh no! You said a baaaaaad word!
Patrick Star rushes in from stage left, with ice cream all over his mouth, while holding an empty cone
Patrick: Someone ate all my ice cream, Spongebob! I think it was... *shivers* [whispers] The Evil Ice Cream Eaters! Ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!
But before Spongebob can respond, in comes.. Mermaid Man and Barnicle Lad!
Barnicle Lad(BL): Hey.. It's BOY.. not LAD... get it right!
Andri: Well Barnicle BOY stucks, so I've changed it to Barnicle LAD.. Just for this story, of course. It's my right to do so.
BL: Well... all right. I guess Lad'll haveta doo.. Scobby Dooby Doo!
All: .........
BL: What?!?!?!
Andri: *sighs* Nevermind.. just get on with the story!
Once again... in come Mermaid Man and Barnicle Lad!
Mermaid Man(MM): Oooohh.. food! I'm starving!
BL: *frowns* Ex-nay on the food-ay...
MM: *blinks* What did you say? I can't understand a word of your jibberish...
BL: *growls* I was trying to tell you to stop with the food! It's YOUR famous line, remember? The one about evil... Remember?
MM: *gasp* Evvviiillll!!!!! Where's the evil? Where where? *dives into the kitchen*
Squidward: *still reading a magazine* There's nothing evil in there.. unless you count the food.. ahaahaaahaa...
MM: The food's eeevvvviiiillll?! Ahhhhhhh!!!! *dashes out of the kitchen*
BL: Why, oh why did I get stuck with a baffoon as my sidekick?
MM: *screeches to a halt, smashing into Mr Krabs who everyone has forgotten about* Your sidekick? YOUR sidekick?! I think not! I am not YOUR sidekick, YOU are MY sidekick! Just read the comics...
Mr Krabs: *finally puts his eyes back on* Me moneeeeyyyy!!!
Mr Krabs exits stage right, heading for his money vault, where he finds...
Narrator: *is building a house*
where he finds.....
Narrator: *puts the door on backwards.. somehow* Opps...
Andri: Grrrr.. [yells] Yo, Narrator dude! It's your line, dummy!
Narrator: *drops hammer onto foot* Ow! Um, I mean, it is?! Oh goody! *reads the story so far* Aha! I see.. *clears throat* Inside his money vault, Mr Krabs finds all his money, still there.
Spongebob: Mr Krabs found his money? Horray for Mr Krabs! And horray for the Narrator, for doing such a [dolphin sound] job!
Narrator: Gasps are heard all around, as Spongebob says a baaaaaaaaddd word... tsk tsk.. shame on him.. *pauses* Hey, he just insulted me! Why you little...
Spongebob: *is currently busy eating soap*
Patrick: *has forgotten his ice cream dilema* Hey Spongebob... gimme some! I want some candy too!
Spongebob: Bit bot bandy, Batrick. Bit's boap...
Patrick: Caaanndy! *munches on a piece of soap* Hey... this isn't candy.. It's soap! You tricked me, Spongebob! You said it was candy!
Spongebob: Bo BI bidn't, Batrick. BI bold bou bit bwas boap...
Patrick: Liar liar, chant the choir!
Spongebob: Bit's blants bor bire, Batrick.. BI bean bants bon bire...
Patrick: I'm not an idiot, Squidward is! I don't like you anymore, Mr Krabs.
Patrick begins to exit stage left, before coming back
Patrick: Oh hey, Spongebob.. can I borrow a quarter for the bubbles? I mean bus?
Scene fades... curtain falls...
Patrick: Ahhhh! Who ate the lights?!
Ahem.. I'm sad to say, that this is the end of scene one. For those of you who are sad as well, don't worry! There's many more scenes coming soon! ^_^ And for those of you who are glad this is the end.. well.. poop on you! Bwaahhhhaaaaa!!! :P Nah, not really... Heck, if you read THIS far, I'm happy as a cow! I mean duck! Err.. lark! Whatever... eheeehheee..
Narrator: It was a dark and stormy night, bwaahahahaa!!! .... *coughs* Ahem.. I mean.. It was a bright and sunny day in Bikini Bottom, as Spongebob enjoyed frying his krabby patties at the Krusty Crab. A fine eating establishment I might add... Though it does lack that certain something... Aha! It's the cashier, Mr. Tentacles! He never smiles!
Squidward: *wakes up from a nap* [bored voice] Hmm? Where you talking to me...?
Narrator: See what I mean?! *achieves a glare from the writer* Sorry sorry, I'll go on! Ahem... Anyhow, like I was saying... Spongebob was frying krabby patties, Squidward was... sleeping. And Mr. Krabs was counting his money, of course, when suddenly...
CRASH. BANG. THUNK.
Mr Krabs: *rushes out of his office* Was that me money vault being opened?!
Squidward: *exasperated sigh, a pause, then an evil grin* Why.. YES, Mr. Krabs.. It was your vault being opened.. someone just came in and took ALL your precious MONEY...
Mr Krabs: *eyes buldge out* What?! Noooo!!! Not me precious money! All those pennies and nickels, dimes and quarters, ones and fives, tens and twenties.. fifties and hundreds! Ahhhhhh!!! *rips off eyes*
Squidward: *blinks* Uhhhh....
Mr Krabs: *slaps his eyes against the floorboards, before running around the restuarant*
Squidward: .....
Spongebob pushes open the kitchen door, a spatula in his hand
Spongebob: What's wrong with Mr Krabs?
Narrator: *puts on a nasally, bored voice and tries to imitate Squid* He thinks his precious money was stolen.. how pathetic...
Squidward: *glares at Narrator* I'M Squidward, not YOU...
Narrator: *reverts back to normal voice* Oh right.. sorry.. *a pause, and then..* But it's just so BORING being the narrator.. I mean, I get to talk what.. twice in the whole story? It's not fair! I want to play Squidward! He's my idol.. *shiny eyes*
Squidward: Uhhhh... that's.. nice?
Writer Andri: *smacks Narrator with a trout* This isn't in the script, dummies!
Narrator: Ouch! *rubs head* Fine... sorry... continue on without me, everyone.. *sulks*
Spongebob: [whispers] Squid.. you aren't supposed to talk to the Narrator yet.. We don't know he's there...
Narrator: *whimper*
Squidward: *sighs and rolls his eyes, going back to reading a magazine*
Narrator: Hey! I didn't say he was reading a magazine! I said he was sleeping! How can he go BACK to reading a magazine if he wasn't reading one in the first place?!
Spongebob: *twitches* [whispers to anyone and everyone] Can I talk to the narrator now?
Andri: *glare* No, you can't talk to the narrator yet! *looks around* And where the [dolphin sound] is Mr Krabs?!
Spongebob: *overly dramatic gasp* Oh no! You said a baaaaaad word!
Patrick Star rushes in from stage left, with ice cream all over his mouth, while holding an empty cone
Patrick: Someone ate all my ice cream, Spongebob! I think it was... *shivers* [whispers] The Evil Ice Cream Eaters! Ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!
But before Spongebob can respond, in comes.. Mermaid Man and Barnicle Lad!
Barnicle Lad(BL): Hey.. It's BOY.. not LAD... get it right!
Andri: Well Barnicle BOY stucks, so I've changed it to Barnicle LAD.. Just for this story, of course. It's my right to do so.
BL: Well... all right. I guess Lad'll haveta doo.. Scobby Dooby Doo!
All: .........
BL: What?!?!?!
Andri: *sighs* Nevermind.. just get on with the story!
Once again... in come Mermaid Man and Barnicle Lad!
Mermaid Man(MM): Oooohh.. food! I'm starving!
BL: *frowns* Ex-nay on the food-ay...
MM: *blinks* What did you say? I can't understand a word of your jibberish...
BL: *growls* I was trying to tell you to stop with the food! It's YOUR famous line, remember? The one about evil... Remember?
MM: *gasp* Evvviiillll!!!!! Where's the evil? Where where? *dives into the kitchen*
Squidward: *still reading a magazine* There's nothing evil in there.. unless you count the food.. ahaahaaahaa...
MM: The food's eeevvvviiiillll?! Ahhhhhhh!!!! *dashes out of the kitchen*
BL: Why, oh why did I get stuck with a baffoon as my sidekick?
MM: *screeches to a halt, smashing into Mr Krabs who everyone has forgotten about* Your sidekick? YOUR sidekick?! I think not! I am not YOUR sidekick, YOU are MY sidekick! Just read the comics...
Mr Krabs: *finally puts his eyes back on* Me moneeeeyyyy!!!
Mr Krabs exits stage right, heading for his money vault, where he finds...
Narrator: *is building a house*
where he finds.....
Narrator: *puts the door on backwards.. somehow* Opps...
Andri: Grrrr.. [yells] Yo, Narrator dude! It's your line, dummy!
Narrator: *drops hammer onto foot* Ow! Um, I mean, it is?! Oh goody! *reads the story so far* Aha! I see.. *clears throat* Inside his money vault, Mr Krabs finds all his money, still there.
Spongebob: Mr Krabs found his money? Horray for Mr Krabs! And horray for the Narrator, for doing such a [dolphin sound] job!
Narrator: Gasps are heard all around, as Spongebob says a baaaaaaaaddd word... tsk tsk.. shame on him.. *pauses* Hey, he just insulted me! Why you little...
Spongebob: *is currently busy eating soap*
Patrick: *has forgotten his ice cream dilema* Hey Spongebob... gimme some! I want some candy too!
Spongebob: Bit bot bandy, Batrick. Bit's boap...
Patrick: Caaanndy! *munches on a piece of soap* Hey... this isn't candy.. It's soap! You tricked me, Spongebob! You said it was candy!
Spongebob: Bo BI bidn't, Batrick. BI bold bou bit bwas boap...
Patrick: Liar liar, chant the choir!
Spongebob: Bit's blants bor bire, Batrick.. BI bean bants bon bire...
Patrick: I'm not an idiot, Squidward is! I don't like you anymore, Mr Krabs.
Patrick begins to exit stage left, before coming back
Patrick: Oh hey, Spongebob.. can I borrow a quarter for the bubbles? I mean bus?
Scene fades... curtain falls...
Patrick: Ahhhh! Who ate the lights?!
Ahem.. I'm sad to say, that this is the end of scene one. For those of you who are sad as well, don't worry! There's many more scenes coming soon! ^_^ And for those of you who are glad this is the end.. well.. poop on you! Bwaahhhhaaaaa!!! :P Nah, not really... Heck, if you read THIS far, I'm happy as a cow! I mean duck! Err.. lark! Whatever... eheeehheee..