When Lovers Become Friends

Authors Note: This story will be told from Keiko Yukimura's point of view. It may be a little confusing at first, but trust me; it will make sense in time. This is not a normal he-broke-up-with-me-I-still-love-him-and-now-I-have-to-watch-them-be-happy-together story. Nor is it a she-stole-him-from-me-and-I-will-break-them-up-so-we-can-be-together story. It has some unique twists. I wrote this from my own personal experience, so if I go over the top sometimes, I apologize. I just thought that maybe writing it down would help me put things into perspective. I have nothing against Botan either. Of course standard declaimers apply: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho, or any of the other characters. Please read and review. Take it easy on the flames though. I am a fragile creature. Enjoy.

Chapter 1: I'm Sorry, Did You Just Say What I Think You Did?

I cannot believe the words that he is speaking. I refuse to accept this as the truth. How can this be happening to us? My heart was shattered into a million pieces the second he uttered those words.

"Keiko, I have feelings for Botan. I think it would be best for me to look into a relationship with her. But I need some time to decide. I'm sorry, but we need to take a break. I need some time to sort out my feelings."

That was it. He may want her instead of me, and there is nothing I can do about it.

What was I supposed to say? How did he expect me to react? Does he even care about my feelings? Did he ever?

These questions swim rapidly through my head as I dejectedly get up out of his car and walk towards my own. I can no longer feel anything. I believe this is what people call shock. Of all the things I am asking myself at this moment, the most pressing query on my mind is; how could this happen after last night?

I flop down into the seat of my car and lower my head down onto the steering wheel as sobs began to violently rack throughout my body and warm tears started to stream down my cheeks while I recalled the events of the previous evening...

We were over at Yusuke's house and watching a movie. He kept getting messages on his communicator from her all night long. I figured it was work related, so like always, I chose not to interfere. Then he started laughing, and got up and walked off to his room. I continued to watch the movie all the way through by myself. By the time it was over, my patience was gone. I went to his room, opened the door, and he was still talking to her.

"I'm going to go ahead and leave now," I said to him, irritation in my voice obvious, "Goodnight." I turned to walk away when I heard him speak.

"Why are you leaving?" he replied, seemingly having no idea what my problem was.

"Well, it appears you are busy at the moment, and I don't want to bother you, so I will just go and leave you guys alone since it seems you would rather talk to her than me."

And then he reached up and grabbed my hand, looked deep into my eyes. In that instance, there was nothing I could do to tear myself away from his gorgeous, brown eyes.

"Keiko, you are my girlfriend. She is just a friend, she can wait." He sounded so genuine and almost offended. As if to apologize, he tried to pull me down into his lap to hold me.

I resisted his grasp and replied almost coldly, "Oh is that what I am? I couldn't tell by the way you have been acting lately." I knew I was being irrational, but I was hurt and felt the need to lash out at him.

This statement was made in reference to that fact that he had been spending an increasing amount of time with her. Not just through work, but outside, hanging out as friends. I have been so busy with school and work that I just don't have as much time to spend with him as I did before. I know this has been bothering him, so I thought that it would be a good idea for him to spend more time with other people, including Botan. After all she is one of my closest friends, and she would never want to hurt me. Besides, they work together all the time, and I trusted him, and her. So I paid it no mind when she would call him on occasion, but for lately it has become more and more frequent. People have been telling me for months that she has feelings for him, and that I needed to watch my back, but I told them they were wrong. Yusuke loves me and me only. I kept telling myself that it shouldn't bother me, but it did that night, and for some reason, I couldn't let it go. In retrospect, maybe I should have.

He seemed a bit taken back by my words, but kissed me and tried to reassure me by telling me that, 'I was the only woman he wanted in his life and arms at that moment.'

'AT THAT MOMENT' was what he said. I should have realized something then, but instead I pushed to the back of mind and chose not to think about it.

He tried again to get me to snuggle with him.

I recoiled.

"Yusuke, please listen to me," I began, kneeling down beside him and looking him square in the eye, "I am worried that Botan may be trying to steal you from me. I'm not the only one who thinks so either. Both Yukina and Shizuru have told me to watch my back. I told them I have nothing to worry about and that you love me and you would never do anything like that. Please tell me I was not wrong to make that assumption. She seems to need to be in contact you all the time and I understand that you work together, and that you are friends but it is a bit bothersome and curious that this constant communication has really started up all of the sudden. I don't want you to think that I don't trust you because that isn't the case. I trust you more than anyone, but please try to understand that it's her I'm starting not to trust."

He looked at me and nodded like he was taking this all in and in response all he had to say was, "Keiko, I love you. Trust me you have nothing to worry about. Botan and I are just friends. She wouldn't do that to you. She doesn't even like me like that. She just needs someone to talk to. You know she doesn't have many friends, and she just gets lonely some times. You should know how much I care about you. Do you want me to stop talking to her; do you want us to not be friends anymore?"

My first instinct was to say, 'YES, I want you stop talking to her, and just keep your relationship to work only' but I wanted him to know I had faith in him and his love for me.

"No, Yusuke. It's not that I want you to stop being her friend so much as I just want you to be aware of my fears, and just keep an eye open for any advances on her part. Like I keep saying, I trust you, and I feel that you are smart enough to handle this situation the best way you see fit. If you don't think there is anything wrong, than do as you wish."

That was the biggest mistake I ever could have made. Never, ever let the guy decide.

He seemed to be content with my answer so he leaned forward and began to rub my back and kiss my neck. He knows how helpless I am to his charms. I tried to resist at first but I eventually gave in to his advances.

We made love that night. The passion that was shared between us was unlike anything I had ever felt before. I would even go so far as to say that it was the best we've ever had. Both of us were trying desperately to prove our love for one another. I needed him to reassure me that I was the only woman for him, and he knew this and did needed to be done to put my fears at rest.

I left that night feeling like I had nothing to worry about. Yusuke and I were just fine. He and Botan were only friends, and I was just imagining things.

How could I have been so stupid?

Authors Note: So ends Chapter One. Please let me know what you think so far. Like I said before, this story is not as usual as it seems. Who knows, maybe you have been here before too? Please keep reading and reviewing.