Broken Time is an entry for the Musical Cues One-shot contest at The Free Writers and Readers site. The writers have to pick any song and bring it to life in the story.
I included a playlist of the song that inspired this One-shot on my profile. You will see parts of the lyrics sprinkled throughout the story. Happy Reading!
Summary: Edward loses the best thing in his life due to his addiction. Bella cannot take the lies anymore. Its over. There would be no chance that Edward could get her back as his Special Forces Unit was shipped out to Afganistan. Nearly a decade passes by and Edward decides to call Bella where they reconnect and Edward tells her he has only loved her. Bella is thrilled but stunned when Edward refuses to meet with her in person. How can you tell someone you love them and yet not be with them? Come read to unravel the mystery.
***3rd Place Winner - FreeWriters & Readers Musical Cues One Shot Contest***
Broken Time
EPOV:
November 2, 2001
A part of me died when I let her go. Bella walked out of my life and it was entirely my fault. Our divorce was finalized a week before I received the call that my troop and I would be shipped out. As a Lieutenant for the Army Special Forces I was to report for my next assignment after an emergency leave that I requested for so I could deal with my marital problem, my destination was Afghanistan. My hands trembled as I placed phone back to its cradle. A big part of me failed when I signed the piece of paper erasing our bond as husband and wife. It was final. Our life together was over and I had no one to blame but myself.
I was a compulsive gambler and Sin city was around the corner and the temptation was far too great to ignore.
I gambled our life savings away. I returned day after day, intent on winning back what I've lost, believing that I was still in control of myself, my destiny and our life. I believed in the back of my mind that I would win all the money back. But each single day proved heartbreaking as the day it preceded. I lied to Bella when she asked me. I told lie after lie. I wove stories that led her to believe me and I deceived her because I knew she had faith in me and I let her down. I used her love as an instrument to get what I needed to support my vice and it all went down the drain.
I was in too deep, way over my head. Loan sharks were breathing down my neck and beating at my door demanding payback of what I owed them and hell broke loose when I finally dropped our carefully tucked life savings as payment for my debts. I made myself believe that I would repay every single penny back and Bella wouldn't ever have to know. But my luck ran out and I groped for ways to make it up and all my attempts came up empty.
My deceit finally came to bite me. I broke her heart and I felt like an utter fool for doing so. The only woman that meant the world to me was gone and I was all alone.
I cried and felt like a big part of me died that day. I would be all alone for the rest of my life because I could only love one woman, and I let her slip away. I should've gotten down on my knees and begged her to come back. Deep down I knew she deserved someone better. I held her back long enough and my selfishness robbed her of time and I didn't wish to impede her any longer.
I didn't feel the gratification one would feel when they knew that they've done a good deed. I killed her with suffering and I broke her heart. For that, I deserved to suffer a life alone. I would forever regret my inadequacy and shortcoming.
January 14, 2010
I sat in front of my computer and after months of deliberation, I decided to look her up. She was still connected with the Las Vegas Sun newspaper. A picture of her and her husband surprised me. She looked happy in the picture which in my rough estimate was taken a few years ago. Under the picture, a caption said that Eric Shaw died from injuries due to a car accident a week ago and Bella took a bereavement leave of absence for an indefinite period of time.
I sat in front of the computer dumbfounded. I stared at the picture for what seemed to be a long time before I made an impulsive decision to call the newspaper to ask for her number. After getting transferred from one extension to the other, her supervisor, after careful evaluation of my identity that I provided, finally gave me her number.
I stared at the number for a long time. I couldn't bring myself to call even though I just wanted to offer my condolences. I sat in my room debating whether I should call or not. Trickles of sweat made their way down the right side of my face as I sat there conflicted.
Should I or shouldn't I?
To compose myself, I limped towards my IPod perched on a speaker system and browse through my list until I found the song that never failed to calm me down. The trick always worked as the soothing song called Blind filled the room and I found myself singing with it.
I was young but I wasn't naive
I watched helpless as she turned around to leave
And still I have the pain I have to carry
A past so deep that even you could not bury if you tried
After all this time
I never thought we'd be here
Never thought we'd be here
When my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go…….
I dialed the number that was given to me without even thinking anymore, I would hate myself if I lost my nerves. I heard the first ring and got a little dejected as each ring went unanswered. I was about to give up when someone picked up on the fifth ring.
"Hello?" Bella's sweet and melodious voice came alive on the line, the same familiar and comforting voice that I remembered.
I held the phone tighter as I savored the sound of her voice; it had been nine years, nine long years since I last heard her voice.
"Hello?" she asked again and I finally found my voice.
"Bella…" I breathe carefully, afraid that my voice came out squeaky.
"Edward? Edward is that you?"
"Yes Bella. I read about your husband's death, I am calling to offer my sympathy and my sincere condolences." I hurried the words out in case she decided to hang up on me.
"Thank you. This call…..surprises me Edward. How have you been?"
"Could be better, but I am good Bella, thanks for asking. How are you coping?"
"It was so sudden! It still hasn't fully sunk in yet." She admitted in a small voice that left me feeling sorry for her.
"I can just imagine what you are going through Bella. I am here to listen if you need an ear or a shoulder to cry on." I offered sincerely. I felt something in me woke up as I listened to her voice. It had been a long time indeed and I had been craving to hear her voice. I haven't stopped loving her after all these years.
November 24, 2001
Kandahar, Afghanistan
The god forsaken place was arctic, lonely and barren. We trained for every single scenario possible but once I set foot on its soil, the harsh and bitter reality hit me in the face. The awful stench of political unrest and cultural divide was evident. There was no glue that held each tribe together. They would rather look inward than outward. The stretch of their tolerance could only go as far as the boundaries they covered.
My troops and I were there as a surgical air strike team. We were present to provide aid to the Northern Alliance, the strongest unified force in Afghanistan that consisted of several ethnic tribes and resistant forces in the northern part of the country. Our technological know-how would be the ground support as far as calling in an air strike if necessary.
Sad as it seems but I welcomed the strange and unfamiliar feel of my situation. I fed on the unknown to drown my sorrows and the absence of Bella in my life. I deserved every single thing that had happened in my life after I turned hers upside down.
I carried her picture with me, just like every other soul in my group. We all cherished something from our native soil to keep us connected with what we've left behind. I had Bella's picture to look at and to talk to. My parents were both dead, having died in a car accident. I had been going solo for a long time. I was lonely and my loneliness kept me company.
The ache did not diminished with each passing day, instead the pain multiplied knowing that I was responsible for the hurt to the person that I loved. I should have cherished her as I promised in our wedding vows. I could have protected her from the pain that I subjected her to, but I was a coward and I let my lies grow to massive proportion, until it was too late. The damage had been done and the rift between us grew so wide that even I could not even dare cross.
Days turned into weeks that later translated into months, before I knew it I celebrated my second year anniversary shuttling back between Jalalabad, Kabul and Kandahar. I found myself more immersed in my duty and thinking less of my worries. My gambling days were over. I not only lost money but the love of my life. It was much more costly and staggering than any dollar figure could measure up with.
I kept my nights occupied by reading, anything I could get my hands on. I spent minutes even hours in line to get my chance to use the limited internet and computer our base had to offer. I scoured the net to find anything about Bella. I googled her name and came up with few answers. Among them were that she got engaged a month ago and her column in the local paper took off and she was now working for the Las Vegas Sun- a premiere paper for the Sin City as one of it news correspondent.
Life had a way of working itself out. Bella's journalism career finally took off, she was now enjoying the life that she had worked hard for. This was her ultimate dream and that of having a family. Her life was now complete.
Mine was still empty. The gaping hole she left remained vacant.
The war in Afghanistan was deemed the War on Terror.The character of the war evolved from a violent struggle by U.S.-led forces against Al-Qaeda and its Taliban supporters, to complex counter -insurgency effort by U.S.-led forces, against Afghans who claim to be trying to expel those U.S.-led forces. The war has killed tens of thousands of people, the majority of whom have been civilians.
The first phase of the war was the aftermath of the attacks of September 11, 2001, when the United States launched Operation Enduring Freedom, which they claimed had the goal of "removing the safe haven to Al-Qaeda and its use of the Afghan territory as a base of operations for anti-U.S. terrorist activities" In that first phase, U.S. and coalition forces, working with the Afghan opposition forces of the Northern Alliance that quickly ousted the Taliban regime. Insurgencies broke out as a result of the coalition, insurgents blended with the local population using improvised explosive devices and suicide bombings.
Life for us soldiers tethered on the border of unsafe and highly dangerous. We had no idea when our number would be called. Our growing distrust for the civilian population was a big disadvantage, we could be out there patrolling and the next thing we knew, a woman or even a child strapped in a bombing device would go off any time in our midst.
Precarious at it seems I lived each day thinking it could be my last. A son serving his motherland was a good way to go and silently, a way to purge myself of my sins. Bella always haunted my every waking moments. I just wished that she later learn to forgive me and for her to know that I loved her and no one else.
December 12, 2001
Battle of Tora Bora
Our convoy made its way towards the Tora Bora Mountains, believed to be the nesting place of Osama Bin Laden. He supposedly was holed up in the deepest crevices of the mountains. Exactly where was the big question mark. We could only rely on our ground intelligence as we prepare to lay siege on America's most wanted.
The poppy-opium fields were in abundance. Everywhere my eyes could reach, a sea of green and pink bath my eyes with its beguiling beauty. The harvest had been embraced by the American Troops instead of destroying them; we feared the backlash of the farmers would blame us for their poverty.
I sat on the passenger side of the Humvee next to George who was my closest buddy as I surveyed the area with keen and watchful eyes. Damian and Robert sat in the back armed with sniper and assault rifles. We were running in between two other Humvees on our way to the base that was set up in the foot of the mountain. The air was clear and the cold was unbelievably biting as we made our way through hails of dust.
"Boss, why so quiet today?" Damian asked from the back as he mechanically chewed on a stick of gum.
"Nothing feels right today guys, just a bad feeling I guess." I muttered under my breath as I kept my eyes forward, more alert than ever.
A gut feeling that stayed me long after we left our base enroute to the mountains. I could sense that something out of the ordinary would happen today. And the unthinkable did happen. I heard the loud thud that could only come from a rocket propelled grenade even before it hit us. The grenade hit the side of our Humvee where the gas tank was located. I knew from the ensuing explosion that we were going to die.
We had didn't have much time to react as our Humvee flipped and burst into flames even before it landed on the ground. I was thrown off of the vehicle and landed about 10 feet away. I could feel the left side of my body burning. The smell of my burning hair and flesh nearly sent me vomiting as I rolled on the ground to extinguished the flames that ravaged my body. It took me several minutes and many attempts before the flames were snuffed out. I knew I was pretty messed up at that point but the sound of a faint whimper brought me out of my shocking situation.
I saw my staff sergeant Robert, writhing in pain as his leg was pinned down by a piece of broken metal from our vehicle. I had no time to lose, judging from the looks of the remaining portion of our Humvee that was split in half, it would explode at any time. I dragged my body over to my comrade and mustered enough strength to push the metal away from his body and pulled his body in any way I could to safety. Damian and George died on impact and there was nothing else I could do beyond that point.
I couldn't feel the left side of my face as well as the left part of my body. The nauseating stench of my burnt flesh smelled like that of a tanned leather burning over a flame. The revolting odor of my burnt hair was enough to make someone's stomach lurch in disgust. The stink would stay in one's nostril for days.
Adrenaline was the one that gave me surge of power from within because after the explosion, my world went pitch black. Darkness took me and stayed with me for a long time.
I woke up but drifted in and out of troubled, heavily medicated sleep for the days to come. I remember seeing lights and heard commotion around me but I didn't stay awake for very long. I couldn't feel my face and the feeling of emptiness grew more and more. I couldn't find my voice to ask anyone what the heck was going on with me. I remembered feeling all alone, much more alone than ever before. Then I thought of Bella and drifted off to another uneasy sleep.
The months and years the followed after that fateful day in Afghanistan haunted me every day. Not a single time had passed that I didn't think of the day I nearly lost my life. Every time I looked at myself in the mirror, I felt a mixture of I am glad to be alive and why in the heck didn't I died that day. It couldn't even pass as a face that only a mother could love. Seven years after and several skin grafts later, the road to recovery was a slow and painful one.
Doctors claimed that I was pretty lucky that most of my injuries were limited to one side of my body. Whoopteeedoo! I have an artificial ear grafted from pieces taken from the skin of my ass, my hair on the left side of my head was gone replaced by a map-like, keloid looking skin. I shaved my head bald to keep the even look. The left side of my face sustained some burns too and skin grafts were still visible even after years had elapsed.
With an honorable discharge, a hefty check that comes to me every month, a Purple Heart and a Silver Star, I was set for life, an early retirement at the age of 32. Disabled and still alone.
I have a noticeable limp due to the fusion of my skin behind my left knee. Other than that, they said I got away with my life and considered my injuries far better than what the others sustained, and I was fairly lucky that extensive damage was avoided. I could barely feel the left side of my face as muscles died due to the burn, so I guess should consider myself lucky because I still had my right side unaffected. I smirked at the thought.
I toss most of my meat in the blender to avoid chewing hard. Although I kept most of my teeth intact, the numbness in my face made it difficult to chew. A burning and tingling sensation was ever present in my daily life and I was already living in hell. What more was in stored for me?
Throughout my whole ordeal, I still kept thinking of Bella. I thought about her everyday and wondered how life was treating her.
BPOV:
January 14, 2010
"Thank you. I am glad you called, it's been a long time." I still couldn't believe myself. Edward was on the other line after all these years.
"I will let you go now. I will call again if it's okay with you. I know you're still in the grieving process so tell me if you think it's not a good time." His tone was hesitant.
"Call me when you feel like it, Edward. Thanks again for calling." I hung up the phone before he had a chance to hear the rapid beating of my heart which would be utterly embarrassing.
I continued sorting out the paperwork to complete the divorced process that was underway before Eric met an accident. He signed the papers a week before he died and I received them just days before he died together with his girlfriend. The mother of the child he fathered a few years after we got married. What a mess!
He was divorcing me because I was unable to bear his child no matter what we did. I've had consultations with several specialists and even went to a fertility clinic to check on my options but he gave up on me easily. Ours was an easy going relationship. Eric was not a romantic person and I learned to curb my emotions to match his. We became more of a roommate with each other instead of a married couple. I had nowhere to go and my life was boring so I stayed without much option around me.
I have no intention of getting the life insurance payout and I intend to give everything to his daughter so I back dated my signature and wrote the date when I received the divorce papers. I breathe a sigh of relief as soon as I sealed the envelope.
I was twice divorced already and third time wouldn't be a charm because I wouldn't allow myself to go through another failed marriage.
I thought about Edward and his call. It was a pleasant surprise indeed. It didn't dawn on me how much I missed him 'til I heard his voice. I found myself looking forward to his call but I had to make sure that he was unattached when calls back again. I would hate to do the same thing that Eric's girlfriend did to me.
I waited all week for Edward's call. I found myself glancing on the phone and checking the caller ID if I somehow missed his call but nothing registered under his name. I saved his number and yet I couldn't bring myself to call him so I kept waiting.
I kept thinking about him the whole time, what has Edward done with his life? Had he kicked the gambling habit? What was his wife and children like if he had a family? Why do I keep thinking about him? I scolded myself for entertaining the warm thoughts of our happy times together. He was perfect. Edward was gentle and totally in-tuned with my feelings. I was very happy with our life together until things fell apart when he succumbed to gambling and squandered our life savings away. I wanted him to ask for a second chance when I brought up the divorce but he didn't. Maybe, he really wanted out. I knew in my heart that I loved him still. I never stopped loving him and it scared me.
Weeks passed without a word from him and it worried me. He may after all, just wanted to offer his sympathies and nothing else. Family matters may be a factor why he hadn't called and I made myself move on without expecting a call from him anymore. There was no use in waiting.
February 14, 2010 – 9:00 AM
The sound of my cell phone ringing woke me up that morning and I glanced on the phone and saw Edward's name. I almost dropped the phone in my haste to answer the call. I was breathless with anticipation by the time I spoke.
"Edward…."
"Good morning Bella, did I wake you up?" his low voice sent warmth all over me as I held the phone closer to my ear and snuggled my head on a pillow, a smile on my face.
"Good morning Edward, no it's okay. I was waking up anyway. How are you?" I could hear the smile in my voice too.
"I am good Bella and yourself?" A tinge of smile laced his voice too. I started rubbing my legs on my pillow at the sweet sound of his voice.
"I am doing well all things considered….." I debated whether I should ask why he hadn't called sooner and I did before I had a chance to stop myself. "Why hadn't you called sooner? I've been waiting for your call…." Putts, I can't believe I just said that.
"I…ah…ummm… got a little busy." His hesitation was evident and I sprang on my bed and ask the question that had been nagging at me the whole time.
"Edward, are you married? Is that why you haven't called?" I wanted to kick myself but I had to know.
"No Bella, I haven't remarried. There was no one….." he abruptly stopped in mid-sentence and my heart started beating wildly against my chest.
"No one? What do you mean by that?" I prodded on, wanting to hear what he was going to say.
Edward didn't answer right away. I could hear the sigh on the other end of the line as I waited patiently for his response. "There was no else but you Bella."
I felt tingly and overly happy when he said the words and I believed him. Deep down I could sense the sincerity of his words. I sat upright on my bed, my emotions were going haywire. I wanted to see him.
"Why hasn't there been anyone?"
"Because they're not you Bella," his voice dipped lower into a sultry bass that made my heart swell. I knew what I wanted to do right at that very minute. Dangerous waters I wanted to thread but I missed him so much and I needed to be with him.
"Can we meet Edward?"
"NO!" he spat the words out.
"Oh, I'm sorry if I made an assumption, I just thought maybe-" He cut me off before I could blurt more of my feelings out. The feeling of rejection completely blanketed me as I felt my shoulders sag.
"Bella, don't be sorry. I can't see you. I don't have any reason to waltz back into your life like this." Sadness was palpable and his voice broke as he spoke.
"I am glad you did Edward. I missed you so much." I spoke my mind and instantly regretted it when I heard his response.
"How can you miss me when your husband just died? Don't play games with me Bella!" his accusation sounded bitter in my ears. Sure, he had no idea how my life with Eric was like.
"You don't understand Edward."
"Yes I do and I am sorry that I called you. I knew I shouldn't have." He hung up the phone before I could respond. The line went dead and the busy tone followed after. I stared on the wall, unable to move. How could our conversation have ended so badly? Tears started brimming in my eyes and they flowed relentlessly down my cheeks. I felt wretched and alone. I buried my face on my pillow until I fell asleep with misery wrapped tightly around me.
A series of persistent ringing woke me up and I glanced at my digital clock, 3:00 PM. I slept the whole day away after Edward hung up on me. I flicked the phone on without even checking the caller ID as I wiped the sleep and dried tears from my puffy eyes.
"Bella, I am so sorry. I had no business talking to you that way and I feel really bad for speaking to you in such a manner." He apologized.
"It's okay…. I shouldn't have assumed that you would want to see me too."
"But I do, I just can't see you now or ever. Let's just keep talking on the phone, if that's okay."
What was he trying to hide from me? I wondered but decided not to press on the topic. I could bring it up another day, maybe.
"Okay but I want you to know something Edward." I proceeded to tell him about Eric, my life with him and the divorce. I had to make him understand that my relationship with Eric was long over even before he died.
"I am sorry to hear that Bella. Could you forgive me for jumping into conclusions?" Edward asked.
"Yes, I forgive you." We ended the call on a lighter note and I felt much better after that.
Months passed as we grew increasingly closer as we spoke over the phone nearly every day. Edward would normally call me after work or I would call him at random times when I felt like hearing his voice. He remained tight lipped about many details of his life. Whatever bits and pieces I could piece together led me to believe that he was hiding something. I subtly brought up my desire to see him on several occasions but he would either quickly change the topic or directly refuse my invitation.
I kept thinking about him and after six months of talking on the phone, I decided one day to fuck it, I will see him even without him knowing. I will knock on his door and see what happens. I couldn't just sit around and play phone games with him.
I was able to persuade a friend of mine who was connected the police department to look up his name and address.
"Bella, you know this is a crime. I am not supposed to do this." Jeremy said in an exasperated tone but I knew my persistence finally got to him.
"I owe you big-time Jeremy, I'll take you and Chloe out to dinner next week just to show you how grateful I am." I teased. Chloe and I became best friends when she worked for the paper and she met Jeremy through me.
"Here's the address, this better not leak out or I'll get my ass fired you know." I hung up happily after I wrote Edward's address down. His birthday was this coming weekend and I decided to drive to Los Angeles on that day. With my plan perfectly in place I breezed through the entire week at work with a big smile plastered on my face.
August 11, 2010
I happily sped through the freeway from Las Vegas to Los Angeles. I had already ordered a birthday cake from a famous bakery for Edward. It would be ready and waiting for me just before noon. I planned to take him out for his birthday lunch and hopefully, we could have a great weekend together. I made a hotel reservation close to his address and I wouldn't take no for an answer. What could he do if I was already at his doorstep? I was ready to take our friendship to the next level. I hope that he felt the same way too.
With cake in hand, I bounded for the stairs of a lovely rows of townhome nestled in a quiet part of the city. Not bad Edward! I happily told myself as I rang the doorbell. I heard shuffling footsteps before the door opened.
"Hi, is Ed-" the words were stuck in my throat as I stared in horror and disbelief at the man who had answered the door. The left side of his face was disfigured. The skin was shiny white and flaky looking and his left ear didn't look right and his left eye had an opaque appearance. His bronze hair was gone and a part of his lips were fused together.
The look that crossed his face ranged from surprised, anger and mortification. His mouth hung open in utter surprised immediately replaced by a pained look before he slammed the door on my face.
I dropped the cake on the ground as I wrestled with the realization behind the reason why he didn't want to see me. I stood outside his front door for a good amount of time as tears wouldn't stop pouring. It took a decent length of time before I gathered my bearing.
I rang the doorbell and knocked on the door again and waited.
Silence.
"Edward, I know you can hear me. I will stay out here until you let me in." I didn't stop pounding on the door and ringing the doorbell alternately. If I have to stay out here overnight, so be it!
EPOV:
August 11, 2010 12:00 PM
I turned 33 years old today. Another insignificant birthday with no one to celebrate it with. Bella said she would call and I have been waiting all morning to hear from her. It's almost noon and I haven't heard from her. I would call her sometime soon just to check if everything was alright with her. I have gotten used to our almost daily talks over the phone and hearing her voice over the phone had brought me comfort and peace. She finally forgave me and I was thankful for that. Although Bella had grown insistent on seeing me and I turned her down every single time. I knew that I wouldn't let her see me in my hideous appearance. People grimace when they see me and stares followed me everywhere I go. I was not going to subject Bella to such a discomfort. It's better if we leave our communication over the phone.
The sound of the doorbell rang and I padded over to open it, not bothering to use the peephole. It would likely be one of those people trying to sell something door to door.
I swung the door open and was shocked to see Bella standing outside looking more beautiful than ever, clutching a birthday cake on her hands with a big smile on her face that slowly faded away as it dawned on her who I was.
I followed my instinct and slammed the door on her face. What was she doing here? Why would she take a four hour trip to see me?
What could she possibly be thinking now? I looked like a monster! A freak show! How could she be so insensitive and not heed my request that we leave our communication strictly by phone?
The doorbell chimed repeatedly followed by the pounding of the door after thirty minutes, just when I thought she might have left. I heard her say that she wouldn't leave until I open the door.
She cannot be that persistent! I angrily muttered to myself as I paced the living room. The rapping on the door continued and the doorbell didn't stopped buzzing.
Whatever! I finally decided after a good hour to let her in. It's better this way. She could see me and go on with her life. I felt sadness knowing that this may well be the last time I would hear and see her.
I opened the door and found her leaning on it. She nearly fell on me if I hadn't caught her by the waist as she stumbled forward.
I caught a whiff of her sweet smelling hair that fell on her face as I steadied her on her feet. She looked rather embarrassed as she held on my arms for support. The feel of her soft and warm hand sent shivers down my spine as I braced myself for what was to come.
I gestured to the sofa in the living room before I closed the door, taking note of the smashed cake on the ground. Bella seated herself on the sofa, not taking her eyes off me.
"Bella, why didn't you respect my wishes?" I crossed my hands over my chest as I leaned on the door. I quickly donned on a baseball cap and a sunglass to cover my blind left eye.
"I…..wanted to celebrate your birthday with you…..I had no idea…..Edward, please forgive me for not listening. I am so stubborn but I just wanted to see you….honestly. I am so sorry." She started weeping in front of me and my heart melted at the sight of her crying form. Only I could make her cry again. I knew I shouldn't have called her, I shouldn't have re-entered her life and involved her in my messed up life. We have nothing together but the memories we had once, long time ago.
I crossed the room in a few strides despite my limp. I sat next to her and deliberated if I should console her. My urge to touch her got the best of me and I put my arms around her, she turned and buried her face against my chest and cried.
"Bella honey, please don't cry. It wasn't your fault. You had no idea of what became of me. I am sorry that you had to see me this way." I continued holding her as I rubbed her back as her body started shaking in grief. It feels so right having her in my arms, just like before.
She wrapped her hands around me as sob after sob consumed her. We stayed enfolded in each other's arms for a long period before she spoke.
"Edward, can you tell me what happened to you?" She looked at me, trying to look through my dark sunglasses, her face etched with sadness.
I pondered on how much information to disclose and decided to let her in on what happened to me after I signed our divorce paper. My trip to Afghanistan, my painful recovery and my misery all because I let my foolish gambling habit take away the most important person in my life.
"Would you believe me when I say that not a day passed that I haven't thought about you?" I finally asked when I finished recapping the past nine years of my life.
Bella chewed on her lips while occasionally gasping and cried some more while I told my story. Her face was intent and lovely brown eyes never left my face. She somehow took a hold of my scarred hand and kept it on her lap.
"Would you believe me if I say that I haven't stop loving you, Edward? Even after all these years, I kept wondering why you didn't ask me for a second chance because I would have given it to you." She whispered as she scooted closer to me.
"I don't want you trap in an unhappy marriage and I saw how unhappy I have made you. I saw the pain and misery in your eyes. I cheated you out of the life that you were trying to put together for us. I was young and foolish. I thought I could make everything back before you found out what a loser I was." I picked up her other hand and held onto it. I don't know what emboldened me but I had to feel Bella again.
"I went because I thought you wanted an out already. I was foolish also. I shouldn't have given up so easily."
"I love you so much Bella, so much that it hurts!" I confessed and I took one good look at her but saw nothing but love in her face. Could I be dreaming?
"Edward, can I do something if it wouldn't offend you?" She sat up straighter as she removed her hands from mine.
"Sure," I answered hesitantly.
"I want to see your eyes when I talk to you." She gently brought her hands up on my face and gently removed my sunglasses before I could stop her.
"I am blind in one eye Bella, but I can still see that time hadn't changed you. You are still the most beautiful girl I've ever seen."
"And you are still the same Edward to me," her voice was suddenly husky. My breath caught in my throat as it dawned on me that she might just be a brave girl despite being repulsed by my appearance.
"Aren't you in the least repulsed by me? I am hideous Bella. I am disfigured and ugly and horrifying looking-"
She stopped me from talking when she raised her lips to mine. I didn't return her pity kiss. I moved my face away from her.
"No Edward, I love all of you. I don't care how you look."
She boldly took over by seating herself on my lap to face me and held the back of my head to plant another kiss on my lips. This time I didn't fight it but returned her kisses hungrily and with ardent passion. We explored each other's mouth with desire and urgency.
"You have to know that I can't feel on my left side very well." I said after we paused to catch our breath. She rubbed her body against mine. Her desire was clear, she wanted me as I much as I wanted her.
"Then I will make sure that my tongue will stay on the right side all the time." She said with a twinkle in her eyes, her sultry red lips breaking into the smile that always killed me. I could feel her need radiating off her sending ripples of desire vibrating within me. I wanted to taste her right then and there.
"Aren't you in the least worried about my performance in bed?" I asked the most dreaded question since my accident.
"I would only worry if you are worried about it." She responded too quickly.
"I don't think we'll have a problem in that department." I replied with a wicked gleam in my eye as I tugged on her hand to help her on her feet as I led her to my bedroom.
After all this time I never thought we'd be here.
"Happy Birthday Edward!" Bella whispered as she slowly released the buckle of my belt.
"A very happy birthday indeed." I echoed as I finally held her as closely as I had been longing to do knowing that somehow I been given a second chance.
A/N: The story came up after I chose a song I want to use for the contest. I had no idea what I would write initially. I loved the twilight characters especially Edward and Bella and I wanted to see them in another scenario, as humans. So this story came about as I was browsing over the internet and came upon some news about President Obama planning to get our troops home soon. The rest is history... I buried myself in research and looking at pictures of burn victims, opium fields and so on. If you are wondering if I ever served in the military, the answer is no. I wish I did but I am past that age bracket already lol.
So what do you guys think of my little one-shot? I really would love to hear your thoughts and get a chance to read your comments. Show me some of that honest to goodness "pat in the back and thumbs up." Please hit the comment button before you go. Thanks for reading!