I wrote this pretty quick so there might be some or many grammar errors, I think I caught all spelling errors, it's been a while since I wrote a Fan Fic my original sign on was Evan67 if you want to read some of my earlier stories . Also I made a few things up that aren't in the Star Wars universe.
Let me know if you like or dislike.
Jerry, George, Elaine, Kramer and the rest of the gang are on the Death Star and part of the Empire. I own nothing of Seinfeld or Star Wars.
A Dreadful Hope
Jerry is in his quarters when the buzzer sounds.
Jerry: Yea
George: It's George.
Jerry presses the door mechanism opening it.
George: Jerry I got big news.
Jerry: You decided to dress as a Storm Trooper to pick up woman again.
George: No and I did that once and for the record it worked.
Jerry: Oh that's right Morgana from laundry. What did she do again when she found out you weren't a Storm Trooper?
George: Nothing.
Jerry: Nothing, she told Governor Tarkin who had you clean out the turbo flushes in the guest suite after Jabba the Hut stayed there.
George: I still can't figure out what or who he ate.
Jerry: So what is it this time?
George: I was down in the brig dropping off a new droid to the guards and I saw Vader enter and guess who he had with him.
Jerry: I don't know Admiral Ackbar.
George: Admiral Ackbar the squid?
Jerry: How did that happen anyway a squid getting intelligence and becoming an Admiral? What's next the Ewoks will over throw the Empire.
Jerry and George Laugh.
George: Any way it wasn't Admiral Akbar it was…
The door opens and in walks a Storm Trooper.
George: Oh great I'm done for, Vader will probably choke me to death with his finger. I knew I shouldn't have hit on that Medical Droid.
Storm Trooper: George it's me Kramer.
He removes his helmet.
Jerry: Really George a Medical Droid.
George: It had human hands.
Jerry: I'm surprised you're still on this floating ball. And you Kramer I would love to know how you became a storm trooper.
George: I guess it's because you can't shoot the back end of a star destroyer from two feet away.
Kramer: Very funny I told you Bob Sacamano put a good word in for me.
Jerry: Bob Sacamano he is about as areal as Yoda.
George: How did you even get through basic training?
Kramer: Basic training I just put the uniform on.
Jerry: That explains a lot.
Kramer: Any way I was just down in the Storm Trooper lounge and guess what.
George: There's a lounge for Storm troopers.
Kramer: Oh yea we have weights, hot tubs, card tables and a steam room, even a sub particle juicer it's great down there.
George: A steam room, I'm lucky if I get one minute to take a shower and forget about hot water.
Kramer: Guess what I just found out.
Jerry: That women from the planet Wilkin are actually men.
George: What do you mean men?
Jerry: Men male guys.
George: That can't be true.
Kramer: Oh it's true.
Jerry: Of course it's true everyone knows that.
George: George doesn't know that. Plus wouldn't you see there ….you know.
Jerry: No, when there with a male there outer appearance changes to look female and it kind of hides and when there with a female it's the opposite but there physically males.
George: Oh my G-d.
Jerry: Georgie something you want to tell us.
George: No no Kramer go on.
Kramer: Anyway I just found out this space station can destroy a planet.
Jerry: You're just now finding that out. It's called the Death Star and its run by a guy named Darth Vader, plus another guy who is about 200 years old with the title Grand Moff and has the personality of dead space slug.
George: What did you think we went around saving puppies and kittens?
Kramer: I don't know I thought we were just exploring places.
George: Exploring places, Kramer this is the Empire we don't explore things we destroy things it's what we do.
Jerry: Remember last week when we explored how to kill the last remaining members of the Jomari race.
Kramer: I can't be a part of this.
Jerry: Kramer you're a Storm Trooper or at least pretending to be one.
Kramer: Then I quit.
Jerry: You can't quit the last Storm Trooper to quit was used as target practice.
George: Of course he died of starvation but still.
Kramer: Then I'm going on a peace strike.
Jerry: A peace strike.
Kramer: Yea I won't be a part of it Jerry no way. Oh and Princess Leia is on board.
George: I wanted to tell him thanks a lot Kramer.
Jerry: How do you know?
Kramer: I was on board her ship when it docked. She shot Willy Womper.
George: Not the same Willy who still owes me two hundred credits.
Kramer: That Willy.
George: Just my luck.
Jerry: I thought those suits protected you guys from Blasters.
Kramer: This suit it's like wearing paper couldn't stop a spit ball.
George: So are you going to see her.
Jerry: You know it wasn't a good break.
George: Oh right you broke up because of her hair.
Jerry: The double side bun, not a big fan. It was like being with someone wearing two bagels on their head.
George: I always found that hair style very attractive.
Kramer: Come on Jerry you have to go see her.
George: Yea Jerry.
The door buzzer goes off again. Jerry hits the button and in walks Elaine.
Jerry: Lanie.
Elaine: Jerome, George, Cosmo.
Kramer: Guess what Elaine, Princess Lea is on board.
Elaine: I know that's why I'm here I was taking notes while Vader interrogated her. I'll tell you Vader is one scary guy he might be sponge worthy though.
Jerry: The Darth Vader is sponge worthy; the guy is the walking definition of evil.
George: You're telling me once I had to bring him his lunch and the cook forgets to include a piece of cake. Vader brings him up on the screen the next thing you know the guy lights on fire.
Elaine: What did you do?
George: Nothing.
Jerry: You ate the cake didn't you?
George: Yes I ate it I was hungry; I didn't think Vader would care. To this day I always get this feeling Vader knows it was me. He uses the Force its crazy he can sense it.
Jerry: So Darth Vader the Dark Lord the right hand of the Emperor, who has studied the Force since he was a child, killed countless beings uses it to find out who ate his cake.
George: I know it's crazy Jerry.
Elaine: The Force isn't no big deal I dated a Jedi once not that impressed. We would be at a restaurant and he would make the waiter bring us free appetizers.
George: They can do that.
Jerry: Why you want to ask him out.
George: I'm just saying a guy like that could come in handy.
Elaine: I'll give you his number he's a Wilkin.
Jerry: George maybe you know him.
Elaine: Any way Jerry, are you going to go down and see her.
Jerry: No.
Elaine: Jerry she knows you're on board.
Jerry: How.
Elaine: She remembered me and asked about you.
Jerry: Before or after she was interrogated.
Elaine: Before.
Kramer: Jerry she asked about you.
Jerry: I don't know she's on the cell block level I can't get down there.
Kramer: Hold on.
Kramer takes his communicator out of his belt.
Kramer: Newman I need you at Jerry's place.
Within a few seconds later there's a knock. The door opens.
Jerry: Hello Newman
Newman: Hello Jerry.
Kramer: Newman can you get Jerry down to the cell block level.
Newman: What for telling bad jokes. Ehh ehh ehh
Kramer: No his ex-girlfriend is down there.
Newman: Oh right Princes Leia.
George: Even Newman knows.
Jerry: And how is Newman going to get me down there, have me hide in his pants.
Newman: Very funny Seinfeld.
Kramer: Newman delivers messages all over this place.
Newman: That's right I'm an Imperial Mail Carrier, I know all that goes on in this station.
Jerry: Imperial Mail Carrier that's right up there with Assistant to the Assistant manager of Droid delivery.
George: Hey that's my job.
Jerry: I know.
Newman: Yea well I know every ones dirty secrets on this station; I know that Governor Tarkin likes to take midnight swims naked making Jawas watch him. I know the meat we eat is all from a single animal just cloned millions of times. I know when I'm in bed at night rolled up in a ball praying for this metal planet to explode and free me from my nightmare of a supervisor Lieutenant Harchrang. He's always yelling at me and hitting me. I tell you I want to kill him I want to tie him to the back of a Tie fighter, oh how ironic that would be, I hate him.
Kramer: Newman!
Newman: Sorry. Jerry meet me at lift 44 at 3 today and I'll get you down there.
Newman leaves.
Jerry: I don't know I'm sure she's still mad about the whole hair thing.
George: It's been years she probably doesn't even remember why you broke up.
Elaine: Yea don't worry about it.
Jerry: Alright I'll go.
Kramer: Giddy up
Elaine: I'll see you guys later, Captain Peterman Wants to talk to me.
Its three o'clock and Jerry is standing by lift 44 when he gets a tap on the shoulder.
Ba: Jerry how are you.
Jerry: Banya I thought Vader stuck you on a garbage scow.
Banya: He did, but I got off on Tatooine and worked two shows a day at a local club, I killed Jerry Killed.
Jerry: Yea you killed all right, what was the audience Sand people.
Banya: Sand people that's gold Jerry gold. No, one of Vader's people saw me loved my Womp Rat bit next thing you know I'm performing at Commander Praji's kids Manhood ceremony.
Jerry: That was supposed to be my gig.
Banya: I'm working the big room here tomorrow night.
Jerry: You're working the Emperor Room.
Banya: I am and the Emperor will be there.
The lift opens.
Jerry: I got to go.
Banya: Alright Jerry I'm late any way I have a meeting with my agent.
Jerry gets in the lift.
Kramer is in the Storm Troopers lounge with his helmet on just sitting there when two other troopers show up.
Storm Trooper 1: Hey Buddy what's wrong, you're hanging your head.
Kramer: What's wrong? I just found out this place can destroy a planet.
Storm Trooper 2: Really. I thought that was just some stupid rumor.
Storm trooper 1: Me to.
Kramer: Oh it's no rumor it's a full on Death Star, Boom POW goodbye planet.
ST1: I can't be a part of this; I only joined up to see the galaxy.
ST2: I joined for the medical plan.
Kramer: Well I'm starting a peace strike.
ST1 & ST2: Peace strike?
Kramer: Yea you know peace love and more peace.
ST1: I'm in.
AT2: I'm in also, plus I know a bunch of other troopers who will join.
ST1: Lets meet at the supply bay at midnight.
Jerry is in the lift when it comes to a stop as the door opens Newman walks in.
Newman: Hello Jerry.
Jerry: Hello Newman.
Newman: Ok next stop the brig just take this.
Newman hands Jerry a black mail bag.
Jerry: Why is there sweat stains on this,
Newman: That's not sweat, ehh ehhh ehhh
Jerry: Newman!
Newman: Relax Jerry it's just gomba berry juice.
Jerry: What are you five, gomba berry?
Newman: Enough Seinfeld when the lift stops just follow me.
Elaine is sitting across from Captain Peterman who is looking at a model of the Death Star. The door opens behind Elaine and a Storm Trooper is standing there.
Elaine: It was George Costanza he did it.
Storm Trooper: It's me Elaine, Kramer.
Elaine: You know Kramer you need to stop doing that. Can't you wear a name tag or something?
Peterman: Mr. Kramer what is it I can do for you.
Kramer: I need some chairs.
Elaine: Why do you need chairs?
Kramer: I'm having a meeting.
Elaine: A meeting about what.
Kramer: It's the first Empire Peace meeting.
Peterman: Empire Peace meeting. Ahh yes I remember back in my pre academy days I was part of the Droid Freedom Movement, the DFM. Oh what a time, we protested to give Droids all the rights we have. We spent our time wearing flowers in our hair, dancing in fields eating non cloned food and listening to some spectacular music.
Elaine: So what happened?
Peterman: Some Imperial Droids infiltrated us and killed every one but me and a young man name Obie-wan Kenobi . Not sure what happened to him but from what I remember he could wear the hell out of a robe.
Kramer: that's not good.
Peterman: Oh but that was years ago, now it's all different I'm sure they are more tolerant of different views.
Kramer: So about those chairs.
Peterman: I'll send some droids down to set them up.
Kramer leaves.
Elaine: Why am I getting this feeling this will not end well.
Peterman: Maybe it's the force.
Elaine: Yea maybe.
Peterman: Any who Elaine these Storm Troopers a clumsy bunch I liked them better when they were clone troopers. But I digress lately the air in here has been pretty rank can you get someone to open the ventilation tube.
Elaine: I'm not sure.
Peterman: Elaine you can do it just head down to the control bay look for a guy named Spinchacca tell him I sent you and he'll open the vents.
Elaine: Spinchacca that's his name.
Peterman: Yes me and him go back years he was my roommate at the academy he always claimed he was part Wookie. I'll tell you when he took his shirt off it showed.
Elaine: Why don't you just call him on the radio?
Peterman: do you know what level the ventilation controls are on.
Elaine: No.
Peterman: Then you better get a move on.
The lift that Jerry and Newman are on comes to a stop at the prison level.
Newman: Just be cool Seinfeld.
Jerry: Be cool, what are you a Jazz musician.
As the two walk out Newman goes to the desk where two guards are standing.
Newman: I was told to deliver this to the Princess from Governor Tarkin.
Newman takes out an envelope.
Guard 1: It's late for you to be down here Newman.
Newman: Training this new guy. I think he's from the planet Moron.
Guard 1: Yea he looks likes like a Moron.
Jerry: Very funny.
Guard 2: She's in cell 2187.
The two of them start to walk down the hallway.
Jerry: That was easy.
Newman: I told you I'm an Imperial mailman, I have clout.
Jerry: You have clout?
Newman: Also I found out those two Guards are very much in love.
Jerry: Ok.
Newman stops and turns back to the guard desk while Jerry goes to the cell.
When he gets to the cell the door opens and sitting on the bench is Princes Leia.
Jerry: Princess Leah.
Leah: Jerry Seinfeld, I heard you were on board. Do you like my hair?
Jerry: I see your still going with the double side bun
Leah: I can't believe you broke up with me because of my hairstyle.
Jerry: You wear it that way every day.
Leah: I like it everyone tells me they liked it.
Jerry: You're a Princess no one's going to tell you the truth. You could shave your head and paint it green and people would still tell you how much they like it.
Leah: Okay, Okay. Listen can you get me out of here.
Jerry: Help you escape. No way.
Leah: Come on Jerry. You owe me.
Jerry: Owe you for what.
Leah: Remember when we went to the planet Hoth for that romantic ski weekend and I wore that snow bunny outfit.
Jerry: Yes.
Leah: Well?
Jerry: I don't know I have a good thing here I do two shows a week lots of free time.
Leah: You work for the Empire.
Jerry: Empire shempire.
Leah: You know Jerry I might have that snow bunny outfit on my ship plus this hair style is getting a little tired.
Jerry: Alright I'll do it.
George is in his office when his supervisor comes in.
Lt. Carlton: Costanza, Darth Vader wants to see you in his quarters right away.
George: What why.
Carlton: I don't know just get up there.
George: Okay.
George is sweating walking to the lift. He gets in and heads up to Vader's quarters. Once out he walks to the door and knocks.
Darth Vader: Enter.
George: Lord Vader, you wanted to see me.
Vader: George Costanza, I've been looking over your file.
George: You know you can't believe everything you read; I mean that whole Medical Droid thing was just a big misunderstanding. Human hands.
Vader: I sense something in the Force that you are not telling me. I will ask you a question if you answer honestly your punishment will be harsh but fair, if you lie to me I will strike down your father.
George: Oh great my father's here.
Vader looks over at a door and when it opens Frank Costanza comes out.
Frank: George what's going on, I was home enjoying a massage from a very pretty Wilkin woman while your mother was out shopping, next thing you know I'm here.
Vader: You know Wilkins are men?
Frank: Of course I know, what fool wouldn't know that!
Vader: Your son.
Frank: Really George you didn't know that.
George: How am I supposed to know?
Vader: I learned that when I was five years old.
George: Well there you go blame my father he never told me.
Frank: I blame your mother!
Vader: Silence! I didn't bring you both here to argue over Wilkins.
Vader points his hand at George
Vader: Now George Costanza did you eat my cake.
Frank: This is what this all about a piece of cake.
Vader: Silence.
George swallows
George: Well …
Vader: Answer me as I have a ping pong tournament in the Storm trooper lounge in thirty minutes.
Frank: Answer the man.
George: Yes I ate it I didn't think you wanted it.
Vader: Very well then George, you shall face your punishment.
Vader lifts his hand points it towards George who is sweating and scrunching his face.
Vader: Ahhhhhhh we got you.
Frank: Look at his face Darth.
George: What's going on?
Frank: George, me and Darth go back years.
Darth: Your Father and I used to chase the ladies back in the day.
Frank: But not Wilkins.
Darth: Maybe one or two.
Frank: Maybe. We would use the force to get them to come to us.
George: Wait so I'm not going to be shot out into space or choked to death.
Frank: No it was a joke.
Darth: But really George you at my cake.
George: I didn't think you would care. It was such a small piece.
Vader: Okay, well I have to run seems we just picked up a Rebel Spaceship.
George: You mean Rebel scum.
Vader: Yea sure.
Vader leaves.
George: How could you do that to me I thought he was going to kill me.
Frank: You should have seen your face.
George: You should see my pants, now I have to change.
Frank: I think I'll tag along.
Jerry is in the cafeteria at a table when George shows up.
George: Do you know what just happened to me.
Jerry was about to say something.
George: Darth Vader and my father just played a practical joke on me.
Jerry: Your dad and Vader.
George: Yea supposedly they were friends as kids.
Jerry: Was it a good joke.
George: Lets just say the pants I was wearing had to be ejected into space if you look close you can see them floating outside.
Jerry: Where's your dad now.
George: He's taking a tour of the kitchen.
Jerry: Well I saw Princess Lea and she wants me to help her escape. I don't want to be a Rebel.
George: Are you going to help her.
Jerry: I told her yes.
George: How could you.
Jerry: Must be the force.
George: You did didn't you in the prison cell.
Jerry: What.
George: You know what.
Elaine shows up and sits down.
Elaine: Hey.
George: Elaine Jerry is going to help the princess escape.
Elaine: Jerry did you in the Cell?
Jerry: Alright I did I couldn't help myself plus she promised she would wear her hair down for now on.
Elaine: Yea well I just saw her and it was up and tight like two Boy Scout knots.
Jerry: She lied.
George: Of course she lied she's a rebel.
Elaine: Yea Jerry I would of expected George to fall for it but you.
Jerry: I know.
George: Well you can't help her.
Jerry: I told her I would.
George: I tell people I'm going to do all sorts of things but I never do them.
Elaine: Like the time you were supposed to help me move my office.
George: I had a legitimate excuse.
Elaine: Legitimate I didn't know being first on line for tacos was so important.
George: Hey last time they ran out.
Jerry: Well I have to help her.
Elaine: Just tell her you got the times wrong and never show up.
Jerry: You know that's not a bad Idea.
George: I might even use that.
Elaine: Well my work is done here. Off to find Spinchacca.
George: What's a Spinchacca?
Elaine: He's the guy who controls the ventilation system. Peterman wants me to tell him to open it. Feels there isn't enough fresh air.
Jerry: We're in space there is no air.
Elaine: Try telling that to Peterman.
Jerry: How do you work for that guy?
Elaine: Your telling me.
Elaine leaves carrying a map of the Death Star.
George: When were you supposed to help her?
Jerry: In like an hour.
George: Ok so in three hours go back down there and ask her where she was. She'll think you went and all is good.
Jerry: Not bad at all.
Jerry heads down to the Brig when he gets off the lift he sees there was some sort of a gun fight, there are several storm troopers and guards laying on the ground. He walks down the corridor and sees the Princesses cell is open and she is gone. He also notices a hole in the wall where she likely escaped. Jerry turns and walks out very fast.
Jerry is now back in his quarters when the buzzer sounds.
Jerry: who is it?
George: Its George and Elaine.
Jerry opens the door and the two enter the room.
George: This is bad very bad.
Elaine: You don't know bad. I went to see Spinchacca and let me tell you he is definitely part Wookie, I couldn't tell if he had a sweater on or it was his back. Then when I told him Peterman wants the vent opened he starts screaming about how that's the only way some rebel fighter pilot could destroy this place.
Jerry: So did he open it.
Elaine: Yea I'm going on a date with him Friday night.
George: Well I found out the Princess did escape and she's on her way to some rebel base to try and destroy us, nice going Elaine.
Elaine: How do you know that and blame Peterman not me.
George: How do I know, well you just said if you open the vent this place could be destroyed. And she was last seen in a rebel ship.
Jerry: Now that I think of it my problem is solved the Princess is gone I didn't have to help her.
A Storm Trooper comes running in Jerry's quarters.
Elaine: It was George.
He takes his helmet off and its Kramer.
George: Really Elaine.
Elaine: Habit.
Kramer: Jerry you have to hide me Tarkin found out about the peace meeting he sent down a bunch of his personal guards they shot the place up.
Jerry: Where were you?
Kramer: Bathroom, you know how long it takes to change out of this thing.
Jerry: you think Peterman is a rebel.
Elaine: Peterman no way.
Jerry: He knew about the meeting, told you to open the vents.
George: Rebel scum.
Jerry: Really George.
George: I'm hoping it catches on.
Elaine: Either or we need to get off this thing.
Kramer: I know someone who can get us a ship.
Jerry: Let me guess Bob Sacamano.
Kramer: No. Mickey.
Jerry: Alright lets go.
Jerry, George, Elaine and Kramer leave on their way to the hangar bay. As they enter Newman, Banya, Peterman and George's dad are there.
Peterman: Ok Mr. Kramer which one of these fine ships is ours.
Jerry: Oh no Banya can stay.
Banya: I don't want to stay Jerry I want to go with you.
Elaine: How did they find out anyway?
Kramer: Communicator in the helmet.
Elaine: Great the guy who gave away the secret to destroy this place is going with us.
Peterman: Yes Elaine I did but I'm no rebel, it was the Princesses hair, reminds me of dear old mum. She would wear the double side bun all the time.
Newman: Your mom that's disgusting.
Frank: You're a rebel I sensed it in the Force.
George: Rebel scum
Jerry: Not working George.
George: You use the Force?
Frank: Of course I used to be a Jedi knight till that little green pile of Bantha poop tossed me out.
George: What? Why?
Frank: You want to know why, cause I used the Force to make your mother marry me and what a mistake that was. Oh and some very large unexplained gambling winnings.
Jerry: I thought Jedis couldn't marry.
Frank: Well no one told me that part!
Jerry: Of course.
Elaine: Mr. Peterman how could you.
Peterman: We men do very dumb thing when we think of our mothers.
Newman: Again disgusting.
As they are standing there Mickey comes running up.
Mickey: Ok lets go she's over there.
Mickey points to a ship in the corner of the hangar bay.
Jerry: Aren't we going to be noticed getting in a ship and just leaving.
Mickey: Nah there to busy getting ready for the Rebel attack.
George was about to say something.
Jerry: Don't George.
They all run to the ship and get in. Mickey heads to the pilots seat and within a minute or two they are out of the hangar bay and in space.
Mickey: We're clear.
Jerry: That was easy.
Frank: The Force.
George: So you think I have the Force.
Frank: I'm thinking of a number between one and ten.
George: Six.
Frank: You don't have the Force, another disappointment.
Jerry: So where are we headed.
Mickey: I got these coordinates from a friend of mine said we should be pretty happy there, it's a tropical planet.
Elaine: Tropical I like the sound of that.
Newman: Me to. (Looking at Elaine)
George: What about mom.
Frank: We'll send her a post card the woman hates to travel.
Kramer grabs the paper.
Kramer: Let me see that.
Kramer starts inputting numbers into the Nav Computer.
Mickey: Kramer make sure you enter them correctly.
Kramer: I know what I'm doing.
Newman: Hey Mickey got any gomba juice on this bucket.
Newman was standing behind Kramer when all of a sudden the ship starts to rattle back and forth. Newman pushes Kramer who hits a bunch of number.
Kramer: Uh Oh.
The ship goes into hyperspace.
They all scream.
This is where the commercial would be before coming back for a quick add on ending (not sure what the term is)
As the ship comes out of hyperspace they can see large space ship right in front of them. A female voice comes over the radio
Voice: This is the USS Enterprise of the United Federation of Planets, please identify yourself.
Jerry: United Federation of Planets?
Frank: Sounds like some workers union. Space Communists!
Peterman: Space Communists, I had my run in with them a very odd bunch they
Elaine: Ah shut up.
Kramer grabs the radio.
Kramer: Yea this is Kramer I'm here with Jerry, George, Elaine, Frank, Newman, Mickey and Peterman.
Banya: Hey what about me.
Kramer: And Banya.
Jerry: What are you doing you don't know them.
Kramer: There space Communists how bad could they be.
George: Give me that.
He grabs the radio.
George: This is George Costanza how are ya. Look where just trying to find a safe place to land.
Captain Kirk: This is Captain James T. Kirk are you requesting refugee status.
George: Ah yea sure.
Jerry: Refugee status great George now we'll wind up making spare space ship parts on some desolate planet. Space Communists!
Banya: I can't work in a factory I have a hologram special coming up.
Jerry: Hologram Special that was my gig also.
Kramer: I can't be a communists I'm a Storm Trooper we have certain rules.
George: Rules like making sure not to shoot the enemy.
Mickey: It's your fault we're here Kramer.
Kramer: Newman pushed me.
Captain Kirk: prepare to beam on to our ship.
Elaine: Beam what the hell does that mean.
Just as she finished talking they were beamed to the Enterprise.
As they transport stops they are all screaming.
Kirk, Mr. Spock and Bones are in the transporter room.
Mr. Spock: Very odd.
The End