TITLE: The Eye of the Storm (Part 2 of series)
AUTHOR: Ally K
EMAIL: sunshine_slayer@hotmail.com
ARCHIVE: heliopolis when its back up and running, website in progress
CATEGORY: POV, S/J, Future
SPOILERS:
SEASON/SEQUEL: Is the sequel to 'A thousand days, a thousand miles'
RATING: PG
CONTENT WARNINGS:
SUMMARY: What happens when Sam and Jack meet up after seven years, can Sam give up her children, if he still loves her?
DISCLAIMER: None of this is mine; the actual story and idea is mine, but the characters and name etc, don't belong to me.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: There might be a sequel depending on response. Feedback would really be appreciated; did u love/hate it, any comments would really help.
The Eye of the Storm
"Jack? It's Sam" I tell him nervously. I wonder constantly whether I'm doing the right thing and feel immediately in the wrong. Though it is only a phone call after all.
"Hey".
Now that I'm here speaking to him I become conscious that I don't actually know what to say. All my courage has left me and I'm silent, on the phone. Great move. Forcing me to say anything that comes to mind.
"I was just.wondering.. whether you would like to meet me for a drink. tomorrow?" I mumbled it, so I hoped he'd heard.
"Sure" he sounded surprised but not annoyed, I took it as a fairly good sign. "Where and when?"
"Um.Oasis at 9?"
"See you there".
"Bye" I put the phone down amazed, just hearing his voice has placed butterflies in my stomach but now I somehow have to get a babysitter.
When Toby comes in late, I instantly feel guilty, for even ringing Jack. There and then I'm prepared to give it up but I have to do it. I've convinced Toby to do the babysitting so I can go out with the 'girls' and now I debate what to where. If I'm sexy, do I give the wrong signals, or aren't those what I want? I pull on my red sleeveless top with a moderate length black skirt. As I gaze in the mirror, I realise I'm not as young as I used to be but I pound on the makeup in attempt to conceal it.
I see him waiting at the bar, looking older but it only gives him a more distinguished look about him. Still as gorgeous as ever, I wonder how he does it?
The conversation is initially slow with unwanted pauses on which I'm so desperate to break, I nearly say about the weather! When he asks about how Toby and the kids, I cringe. I deliberately stick to just the children and tell him, smiling, about the comical things they do and say.
"So how are things between you and Toby?" he says roughly.
I breathe in deeply and prepare myself to tell him the truth.
"Jack.. the reason I'm here is." I stop; I can't say it. The kids.but I'm here. I don't know what to do..
"What is it?" he asks sweetly.
I'm caught, between my feelings for him and the disgust of doing this to my children.
"I'm sorry" I flee out if the building after grabbing my handbag from the floor.
"Sam" I can hear him chasing after me and I stop. "Please, tell me" he begs.
I feel the tears slip down my cheeks and he moves closer and brushes them away. I can't speak.
"I'm sorry Sam" he apologises. "For how I hurt you". I stare up at him and I can see the hurt in his eyes, and regret.
"I still think of you" I tell him, not sure whether I've said too much.
He's so close now I feel the warmth of his breathe against my hot skin. "I miss you every day, every moment". He forces me to look at him and just his stare penetrates straight through to my heart. "I was a fool then, I never should have let you down".
I break away fearing that soon I'll be unable to resist him. I have to know the answer to the question that had ripped my heart into pieces. "Why, then?"
His eyes immediately dart to the floor and he can't even held his head up. I hope coldly, that he realises how much he hurt me and that he can leave now, if he doesn't feel any regret. He looks guilty and I'm glad. He was the one in the wrong.
"I." he looks up at me, and I think he seeks forgiveness but I don't allow him the easy way out. He doesn't deserve it. Finally he slowly tells me. "I guess I was scared".
"Of what?" I can't even believe myself how callous I'm being but I can't help myself. I just keep remembering the depression I sunk into after he hurt me. I'd never told anyone; even Toby that I'd contemplated suicide because of what Jack had done to me. The only thing that I held onto was the fact that no man would take my life away from me, the life, which I had fought so hold onto.
"Of getting so close that I would ruin your life. I just kept on seeing what I had done to Sarah and I couldn't do that to you".
"How dare you!" I screamed. "You're pathetic! You didn't want to ruin my life, well let me tell you something. You did. Was that your way of justifying the fact that when I found you with her? It wasn't just a one off; you'd being seeing her for months. Get yourself out of that one".
He looked as if I had just punched him in the stomach and I didn't care. All I wanted now was just to go back home to my kids. To my husband, who I trusted and who would *never* do what Jack had done to me so I turned round and started to walk away.
He rushed in front of me, I thought he'd would. He always did want the last say. "You hate me, don't you?"
I stared at him, confused, what type of question was that? The fact that I didn't respond instinctively worried me. I shook my head and answered him. "I hate what you did to me".
I can see his eyes filling with tears and I am left dumbfounded. Jack never let me see him cry.
"I needed you to hate me that was why I did it. I knew it was the only way you'd let go," he tells me, tears flowing down his slightly wrinkled face.
"Why did you have to let me go? Did you not love me enough? What suddenly changed?" I keep throwing the questions at him and I can feel the tears fall down my face too.
"You deserved better than I could give you".
Drop of rain start to pour around us but I barely acknowledge them. I just can't stop staring at him.
"Don't you think I can make my own mind up?"
"I knew you'd never let me go, so I did it for you. I realized once we'd separated you'd forget me and move on, and you did. You see it worked out for the best" he tries to explain sounding tough but it comes out feeble.
I move closer. "You had it all worked out except for one thing". I kiss him lightly own the cheek. "That I would never stop loving you". As I said it I knew it was true. That was why I had to come here tonight.
"You still love me?" he is astonished by my declaration.
"Yes. That was what I came here to tell you". I step back away from him.
"Sam, I love you too".
I just stand there looking at him but for the first time I'm calm. "I love my kids Jack" I turn away from him and just keep on walking.
tbc
AUTHOR: Ally K
EMAIL: sunshine_slayer@hotmail.com
ARCHIVE: heliopolis when its back up and running, website in progress
CATEGORY: POV, S/J, Future
SPOILERS:
SEASON/SEQUEL: Is the sequel to 'A thousand days, a thousand miles'
RATING: PG
CONTENT WARNINGS:
SUMMARY: What happens when Sam and Jack meet up after seven years, can Sam give up her children, if he still loves her?
DISCLAIMER: None of this is mine; the actual story and idea is mine, but the characters and name etc, don't belong to me.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: There might be a sequel depending on response. Feedback would really be appreciated; did u love/hate it, any comments would really help.
The Eye of the Storm
"Jack? It's Sam" I tell him nervously. I wonder constantly whether I'm doing the right thing and feel immediately in the wrong. Though it is only a phone call after all.
"Hey".
Now that I'm here speaking to him I become conscious that I don't actually know what to say. All my courage has left me and I'm silent, on the phone. Great move. Forcing me to say anything that comes to mind.
"I was just.wondering.. whether you would like to meet me for a drink. tomorrow?" I mumbled it, so I hoped he'd heard.
"Sure" he sounded surprised but not annoyed, I took it as a fairly good sign. "Where and when?"
"Um.Oasis at 9?"
"See you there".
"Bye" I put the phone down amazed, just hearing his voice has placed butterflies in my stomach but now I somehow have to get a babysitter.
When Toby comes in late, I instantly feel guilty, for even ringing Jack. There and then I'm prepared to give it up but I have to do it. I've convinced Toby to do the babysitting so I can go out with the 'girls' and now I debate what to where. If I'm sexy, do I give the wrong signals, or aren't those what I want? I pull on my red sleeveless top with a moderate length black skirt. As I gaze in the mirror, I realise I'm not as young as I used to be but I pound on the makeup in attempt to conceal it.
I see him waiting at the bar, looking older but it only gives him a more distinguished look about him. Still as gorgeous as ever, I wonder how he does it?
The conversation is initially slow with unwanted pauses on which I'm so desperate to break, I nearly say about the weather! When he asks about how Toby and the kids, I cringe. I deliberately stick to just the children and tell him, smiling, about the comical things they do and say.
"So how are things between you and Toby?" he says roughly.
I breathe in deeply and prepare myself to tell him the truth.
"Jack.. the reason I'm here is." I stop; I can't say it. The kids.but I'm here. I don't know what to do..
"What is it?" he asks sweetly.
I'm caught, between my feelings for him and the disgust of doing this to my children.
"I'm sorry" I flee out if the building after grabbing my handbag from the floor.
"Sam" I can hear him chasing after me and I stop. "Please, tell me" he begs.
I feel the tears slip down my cheeks and he moves closer and brushes them away. I can't speak.
"I'm sorry Sam" he apologises. "For how I hurt you". I stare up at him and I can see the hurt in his eyes, and regret.
"I still think of you" I tell him, not sure whether I've said too much.
He's so close now I feel the warmth of his breathe against my hot skin. "I miss you every day, every moment". He forces me to look at him and just his stare penetrates straight through to my heart. "I was a fool then, I never should have let you down".
I break away fearing that soon I'll be unable to resist him. I have to know the answer to the question that had ripped my heart into pieces. "Why, then?"
His eyes immediately dart to the floor and he can't even held his head up. I hope coldly, that he realises how much he hurt me and that he can leave now, if he doesn't feel any regret. He looks guilty and I'm glad. He was the one in the wrong.
"I." he looks up at me, and I think he seeks forgiveness but I don't allow him the easy way out. He doesn't deserve it. Finally he slowly tells me. "I guess I was scared".
"Of what?" I can't even believe myself how callous I'm being but I can't help myself. I just keep remembering the depression I sunk into after he hurt me. I'd never told anyone; even Toby that I'd contemplated suicide because of what Jack had done to me. The only thing that I held onto was the fact that no man would take my life away from me, the life, which I had fought so hold onto.
"Of getting so close that I would ruin your life. I just kept on seeing what I had done to Sarah and I couldn't do that to you".
"How dare you!" I screamed. "You're pathetic! You didn't want to ruin my life, well let me tell you something. You did. Was that your way of justifying the fact that when I found you with her? It wasn't just a one off; you'd being seeing her for months. Get yourself out of that one".
He looked as if I had just punched him in the stomach and I didn't care. All I wanted now was just to go back home to my kids. To my husband, who I trusted and who would *never* do what Jack had done to me so I turned round and started to walk away.
He rushed in front of me, I thought he'd would. He always did want the last say. "You hate me, don't you?"
I stared at him, confused, what type of question was that? The fact that I didn't respond instinctively worried me. I shook my head and answered him. "I hate what you did to me".
I can see his eyes filling with tears and I am left dumbfounded. Jack never let me see him cry.
"I needed you to hate me that was why I did it. I knew it was the only way you'd let go," he tells me, tears flowing down his slightly wrinkled face.
"Why did you have to let me go? Did you not love me enough? What suddenly changed?" I keep throwing the questions at him and I can feel the tears fall down my face too.
"You deserved better than I could give you".
Drop of rain start to pour around us but I barely acknowledge them. I just can't stop staring at him.
"Don't you think I can make my own mind up?"
"I knew you'd never let me go, so I did it for you. I realized once we'd separated you'd forget me and move on, and you did. You see it worked out for the best" he tries to explain sounding tough but it comes out feeble.
I move closer. "You had it all worked out except for one thing". I kiss him lightly own the cheek. "That I would never stop loving you". As I said it I knew it was true. That was why I had to come here tonight.
"You still love me?" he is astonished by my declaration.
"Yes. That was what I came here to tell you". I step back away from him.
"Sam, I love you too".
I just stand there looking at him but for the first time I'm calm. "I love my kids Jack" I turn away from him and just keep on walking.
tbc