A/n hey all. This is based on the promo for tonight's "Personal Foul." My muse has gone to the dark side again. This is based on the song from "The Who." This follows cannon up to tonight's episode.
Warnings: Character death and what I sincerely hope is OOC behavior for Danny. If you don't like the above, please turn back now.
Disclaimer: I don't own the show people; I just play in the universe.
No one knows what it's like to be the bad man to be the sad man behind blue eyes No one knows what it's like to be hated to be fated to telling only lies
"Danny…" Her voice was soft and slumberous. "Danny… I love you Danny…"
She turned over in his arms, her golden brown hair slipping across his chest, which invoked a shiver throughout his entire body.
"I love ya too." He kissed the top of her head. "I never want ta move from this position again."
Her dark eyes began to twinkle mischievously. She reached up and ran her fingers through his short, spiky hair. "I can think of other positions that are a lot more fun than this."
He laughed, "You know, when I first met ya, I thought you were just a nice, reserved, kinda cute little country girl.
"You were wrong Cowboy…"
She swung around and straddled him. "I'm going to show you just how reserved and quiet I'm not…" She assured him.
The thunder outside the window crashed again and lightning lit the room like an old fashioned camera flash. They came together and it was fast and hard. They joined their voices to the growl and scream of the storm, making an odd but beautiful symphony. The room flashed black and white again and suddenly Lindsay was gone, vanished like mist on the wind.
"Lindsay…" He called, his eyes darting around the room.
"Lindsay… Where are you?"
The thunder crashed again, echoing off the windows like cymbals in heaven. This wasn't heaven, it was hell… He leapt off the bed and ran frantically around the small apartment. "Lindsay… Where are you?" His voice was hoarse from screaming, and his lungs were on fire, by the time he admitted and remembered that she was gone.
Rain lashed the windows so hard he could hear nothing over the roar and the crash. The news said that this was the storm of the century for New York. It didn't matter. Lindsay was gone, stolen from him before he could make it up to her.
He leaned up against the white wall of the hallway and began to cry, just like every night. It had rained for days, as though all of heaven mourned with him. It would stop raining one day and she would be gone. He'd never get the chance to make it up to her, ever! He slipped down the wall to the cold, hard wood floor, and cried till his throat was raw from screaming grief. The rain still fell and the thunder roared.
He got up and went back to his bedroom. It was time to go out again. It had been six months. He would find the man that did this tonight. He was sure of it. He dressed in old torn jeans, a grey tee-shirt, white socks and running shoes. He pulled on a long black belted raincoat that fell to below his knees.
But my dreams they aren't as empty as my conscience seems to be, I have hours, only lonely my love is vengeance that's never free
The door to the apartment building slammed and locked behind him. He didn't care. It was time to end this torment once and for all. He walked, keeping to the walls of the buildings while watching for a cab. It would be tough to find one in this rain, but he would walk till he found it. Several people passed him, but they all looked away from the man walking in the rain, in the middle of the night, without an umbrella.
A yellow car pulled up to him fifteen minutes later. "Where to buddy," the driver asked.
Danny asked for Central Park and inspected the back of the cab. From what he could see this wasn't the one he wanted, and when he wasn't poisoned with carbon dioxide, he growled in frustration. Every night for the last six months he had looked for this so called Cab Driver Killer. Lindsay had found him… Why couldn't Danny find him? Why couldn't the lab and the police find him? Why was he still out there?
Danny shook the water from his hair and rubbed at his face. The cabby tried to make conversation, but Danny ignored him. Why did everyone what to talk to him? Talking was cheap and it was worth nothing without Lindsay.
Oh God how I love you… I'm sorry I didn't tell you before…
"Hey buddy… Are you sure you want to get out here?"
"Yeah… I'm fine!"
"Suit yourself…" The cabbie took Danny's money and left him outside the park.
He began to walk and there was something in his eyes that made all the denizens of the park gave him a wide berth. The rain went on endlessly. He was soaked, but it didn't matter. He hoped he'd catch pneumonia and die… then it would be over and he could see Lindsay again.
He went three blocks before another yellow cab stopped for him. The man behind the wheel was quiet. Danny gave him another address and sat back shivering. He looked at the passenger bill of rights, and saw that there was what looked like claw marks across the surface. Adrenaline surged to his heart making it race faster than it had in many months, even after the dreams of Lindsay.
"Hey buddy… you want to pull over, "Danny called to the driver.
The man ignored him, and drove on through the rain and the lightning which were heavier than ever. Danny reached for the door latch and realized the locks had been tampered with. He was locked in. For a moment he felt the terror the other victims must have felt. Was this what Lindsay had felt in her last moments? Anger surged through him. How could she have done this on her own? It was crazy. She'd been crazy. Was it his fault for pushing her away and turning to Rikki Sandoval?
There was a hissing sound and fumes began to pour into the back of the car. Danny reached into the inside of one of his raincoat pockets, and pulled out the gas mask he always carried with him when he went hunting into the night. It was a new, smaller version that had been tested in Iraq and was easier to conceal. It worked like a charm and he tapped on the window. He saw the dark eyes of the man look at him. The man didn't seem surprised. He seemed, eager…
Danny wasn't surprised when the cab didn't stop until they were in the old warehouse district of Brooklyn. It was after two am. Danny would have to work fast. The man stopped the cab in front of a falling down warehouse with the name Wilder Dry goods on the side of the rusting building.
The man got out into the pouring rain and opened the door. Danny shot him in the thigh and the man went down into the mud and the water with a splash that echoed into forever.
No one knows what it's like To feel these feelings, Like I do, And I blame you, No one bites back as hard On their anger, None of my pain and woe, Can show through.When my fist clenches, crack it open Before I use it and lose my cool. When I smile, tell me some bad news, Before I laugh and act like a fool. If I swallow anything evil, Put your finger down my throat, If I shiver, please give me a blanket Keep me warm, let me wear your coat --
Mac rubbed at his forehead. His headache had gone up three levels in the last six hours. He picked up his phone and dialed a familiar number. It rang and rang. He sighed again and shut his cell phone.
"Hey Mac…"
He hadn't heard Stella come into his office.
"Stella…" He said, looking down at the file in front of him.
"When was the last time you slept?"
He looked up at the one person he called best friend. Her curls were a little more wild than usual, and her eyes were bloodshot.
"I'm fine…"
"Sure you are… Mac we've lost two of the best CSI's we've ever had in the lab and two friends." Her voice broke. "It's not going to matter how many times you call Danny he'll never answer. He's gone for good."
"I can't give up on him Stella. We have to clear his name. He didn't do this."
"Mac… you know we found the cab with the body. All of the evidence in the car points to the body we found as that of the Cab Driver Killer. He was shot in the leg Mac, with a gun that matches the caliber we all use as our service pistols. He was tortured to death, beaten and stabbed. Nearly every bone in his body was broken."
"It could have been…"
"There is no evidence to tell us who it was. The crime scene and the body were sterilized. Only someone trained as a CSI could do that and clean up everything."
Mac opened his mouth and his eyes burned into hers. "Stella I…"
"Face it Mac… He did this. I don't want to believe it! I wish to God that none of this were true, but it's the only answer."
Mac sat back in his chair, defeated. She was right… Danny had disappeared and three days later the body of the Cab Driver Killer was found. What else could it mean?
His phone rang. "Mac Taylor," He said gruffly trying to keep the tears back.
"Mac…"
"Danny… where are you."
"It doesn't matter… You won't find me with a trace. This is a disposable cell phone.
"Why did you do it Danny…?"
"What do you think I did?"
"You took the law into your own hands. You should have brought him in."
"You don't understand Mac… She was my life! I messed it up. It is the least I could do for her. I dream about her every night. I hear her screams in my head and I can't think anymore."
"She wouldn't have wanted you to…"
"Don't tell me what Lindsay would have wanted!"
"Come back Danny… We'll get you the best defense. We can argue diminished capacity."
"No way Mac…"
"Danny…"
"Tell them all I love them…"
"Danny…"
The young man was gone. Mac slapped his phone shut. Stella closed her phone. She shook her head at Mac. "We couldn't trace it."
Mac nodded, "I know… He's gone. He won't be back!"
--
Danny straddled his motorcycle, the newly purchased one bought with the money from the trade in on his old bike. He pulled on the helmet and kicked the cycle into life. The sun was setting to the west in a riot of scarlet and burnt orange. There would be another storm in Manhattan that night. He would be gone before the first drop splattered on the city he had loved, and on the grave of the woman he would love forever.
No one knows what it's like to be the bad man to be the sad man behind blue eyes