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The chains restraining Caroline's wrists chafe against her skin as she pulls against them futilely. The vervain is burning her but she tries to ignore it as she forces her bindings away from her, trying to break them.
It's pointless.
The werewolf who has been left to watch her laughs at her attempts and she spits in his face. He stands angrily and slaps her, then sprays her with more vervain. Her screams of agony mix with his cold laughter and she wonders if she will ever be able to associate happiness with laughter again.
"Little pretty vampire, so far out of her depth. So close to her death," the werewolf sneers as he teases her. Caroline growls in anger. It had been stupid of her to get caught. This far away from the full moon she should have had no issue fighting them, but there had been too many and she was too weak.
(Always too weak)
A yell from outside distracts them and the man suddenly stands tall, holding the gun loaded with wooden bullets at the ready.
He never stood a chance.
Less than a second passes and he doesn't even have the chance to flinch before Damon stands before him, heart in one hand. He falls to the floor and Damon drops the still beating organ next to him, wiping the blood onto the dead man's clothes. It takes him only a moment before he breaks the chains and pulls Caroline, weak and pumped full of vervain, into his arms. She watches him in fear and he looks at her in frustration.
"Aren't you getting sick of playing the damsel in distress? I'm getting sick of saving you." She hisses in anger, he had brushed a sore spot,
"That's the problem with you Salvatores. You always think that you have to be the saviour. I don't need you to save me."
"Huh. Well in that case," he states in disbelief before dropping her onto the ground. She yelps in pain and sees him looking at her expectantly. She pulls herself off the floor ignoring the searing pain flowing through her every muscle. It takes all of her energy to stand tall without flinching and it's only when he turns away that she lets the pain show on her face. She limps out after him to see a clearing full of dead werewolves with Stefan, Bonnie and Elena standing in the middle. Caroline frowns. Why is it always her that needs to be saved? What about her screams pathetic and weak?
(Maybe the fact that she is)
Someone once told her that vampires don't need to sleep. Caroline is pretty certain that she had read it in Twilight and used to accept that book's words like the Bible. Only now does she see how wrong it is.
It would have been easier if they didn't. At least then it would mean that they didn't dream either. As it is, Caroline's sleep is filled with dreams every night. She feels vervain coated toothpicks driven under her fingernails; she sees wooden bullets being pulled out from under her skin; she hears her agonised screams as stakes are driven into her stomach. And for what? All they ever want her for is information or to use as bait or simply to torture.
At night Caroline cries. She spends all of her waking moments and all of her energy trying not to as she is surrounded by others. But at night, when there are no vampires to hear her or friends to see her or mother to care, she sobs into her pillow. She's afraid to remember and afraid to feel weak. She's afraid to fall asleep.
(She's afraid to dream)
Damon relishes in her misery. He seems to enjoy her discomfort every time that he jokes about her weaknesses and habits of being captured. She's pretty sure that he's getting sick of saving her.
Stefan suggests that Caroline moves into the boarding house. He says that it would be easier to have everyone together in case they need to find her at the last minute. His real reason doesn't need to be spoken. They all know it. It's for her own protection.
(Always needing saving)
(Damn Salvatores always need someone to save)
She's surprised when she begins to associate Damon's face with her saviour rather than her tormenter. She's not sure when it starts to happen. Maybe after he saves her from Klaus, or maybe from the vampire hunters who visited town, or maybe… She stops thinking about it. The number of times that she has been captured makes her head hurt.
He makes it clear that he's not her saviour. She points out the irony of Damon Salvatore not being a saviour. When he pushes her against the wall, hand around her throat, he makes it clear that he doesn't care about either names or irony.
"I'm not saving you next time Princess," he calls out. She frowns in annoyance at his latest nickname for her. She thinks that she actually prefers Vampire Barbie. At least that acknowledges that she isn't totally defenceless and weak.
"I don't want you to save me," she whispers and wonders if he hears her.
He doesn't reply.
This time it's different. They don't have a threat or warning that they want her to carry to the Salvatore brothers. They don't want her for information on the supernatural activity of the town. They don't even want her for bait.
They simply want her dead.
They're werewolves again and she's beginning to get frustrated at how easily they defeat her this far away from a full moon. One holds a stake and the others crowd around, eagerly awaiting the death of one of Satan's spawn. He moves to plunge the wood into her heart but is stopped before he gets the chance. Again, she sees Damon standing behind her attacker, heart in hand, and is rewarded with a most wonderful sense of déjà vu that seems to be a daily occurrence. As the first werewolf falls to his feet, the others lunge forward and Damon fights them off without breaking a sweat. Another comes from behind her attempting to finish the job that the first failed in.
He fails too. The stake brushes the side of her heart and she turns white and gasps in pain. Her attacker doesn't get the opportunity for a second strike. He's dead before he can realise his first mistake. Finally, no living being stands in the room. The only breath comes from her and Damon who are more dead than the bloody werewolves lying on the ground. He leans forward and pulls the stake from her chest and she screams in agony. He lifts her from the chair, yet again breaking the bonds with ease, and holds her in his arms. She doesn't bother complaining this time.
(This was all becoming far too routine)
Caroline wakes in Damon's bed at some point during the night. It's the first time that she's slept in a while, simply as a result of pure exhaustion. It didn't stop the dreams from coming though. She hopes that Damon hasn't heard her quiet sobs or soft groans of pain. Her hopes, however, are dashed when she sees him standing in the corner of his room. She groans,
"I get it. I'm stupid. I'm weak. I'm pathetic. Save it for the morning." He shakes his head and steps closer. As his face is illuminated in the pale moonlight, she sees that he is furious. And she feels more afraid in that moment than the werewolves or the dreams ever made her.
Because they could only kill her.
(With a single word, he could break her)
She shrinks back against the headboard in an attempt to escape the anger that was dripping off him.
"What the hell were you thinking?" he growls, teeth clenched. She looks at him in disbelief,
"Oh. Because I planned to get myself kidnapped and tortured just like every other time."
"No!" he yells in anger and she jumps in fright. "Not like every other time." He is livid and Caroline is afraid of what he might do to her when he's this angry.
"This was not like every other time Caroline. They didn't want to torture you or use you. They wanted you dead!" His chest is heaving and his eyes are blazing, a pale blue fire that haunts her. She frowns and averts her eyes from his,
"So why did you bother rescuing me? They would have solved one of your problems." He sighs and runs a hand through hair that looks like he had been repeating that action all night. Sinking down onto his bed he speaks softly,
"Yes Caroline. You are my problem. Somehow it seems to have become my responsibility to protect you and God only knows why considering that my brother is so much better at playing the hero. You're not making my job any easier by constantly getting kidnapped. You're a vampire for heavens sake." She bites her lip and tries not to let the tears building in her eyes fall,
"It's not my fault. I try to fight them but they're too strong."
"No," he corrects her, "you're too weak." She hisses in anger but knows that he's right. He continues,
"You need to stop drinking Stefan's stupid bunny blood. It will be the death of you." She shakes her head,
"I can't be a murderer Damon."
"You don't have to be."
"I can't live my life out of a blood bag! I can't let it control me," she yells determinedly.
"Of course it will control you," he says bluntly. "It's like thirst or hunger or any other mortal desire. It's a life force; you need it to survive. You won't survive on animal blood and I'm getting fucking sick of saving you."
"Then don't save me!" The pair stare at one another, breathing heavily as if the oxygen they were craving could have any effect on their bodies. Damon furrows his brow,
"I can't. I can't not save you." She doesn't respond. Instead she crawls under the covers of the – his – bed. He sighs and runs his fingers through his hair again. Shaking his head, he climbs into the bed next to her and wraps her in his arms, pulling her tightly to his chest. She tenses momentarily but allows herself to relax in his embrace. She hears his voice gently whisper in her ear,
"Maybe you're like blood to me. You have this power over me that I don't understand. You control me. And I can't let you die." She wonders when her life got so messed up. She's already dead, forever young and eternally wrong. Is this what her life is going to be?
(Empty hopes, broken lullabies and him)
Somehow the thought of it doesn't seem so bad. Him. The thought of her being able to control Damon Salvatore is laughable. And wonderful. The thought of someone needing her for once is terrifying. And exhilarating. She falls asleep in his arms and her dreams aren't so frightening tonight. She doesn't relive her torture or her wounds, but she sees every moment when he breaks through the door; when he sweeps her into his arms; when he defends her with his life.
(Or whatever's left of it)
"Damon," she whispers when she wakes up, the sun barely above the horizon. He groans but she knows he's listening.
"I'll get off the bunny blood on one condition." He doesn't respond but he's definitely listening now. "Teach me how to fight; how to defend myself." She can feel him nodding in approval.
"I need for you to teach me how to be strong so that you don't need to save me anymore." He laughs softly and whispers kindly,
"Sweet Caroline. I'll always save you." She frowns in annoyance. That's the problem with Salvatores. It doesn't matter how strong she is or how much she doesn't want him too.
(He'll always end up saving her)