Disclaimer: I don't own CSI

A/N: just trying something out. Leave me a review if you want me to continue, or if you want me to delete it. And there's the sock cliché in this one. Didn't know what else to do.

…ugh, want to write some fluff now. Have gotten all depressed.

Warning: contains slash. Dark themes.

Living with a Monster

We all wear masks. Not just when it's Halloween. We wear one when we are working, we have one when we buy the day's dinner at the grocery store, one when we eat disgusting meals on family reunions no one really likes (except for the poor lady who cooked the meal), one with friends and one when we are with our lovers. And some of us even wear a mask when we are by ourselves. We all hide the monsters we all really are behind masks. Happy, perfect looking masks.

We keep our masks on, and some even have full costumes, so the world can keep swirling around like it always has done. So our community, and our social morals and unwritten rules, can keep on being the roots of our behavior. The roots of our existence. Our civilized society. The root of how others see us. How they think of us.

Some of us have alcohol problems, others have mental issues and some of us don't want people to see their dark monster. If a family member tried to take suicide, it wouldn't have been talked about. The people who knew about it would simply never bring up the subject, because it's a shame. The neighbors can never know. That would have changed their social status for them. If they knew. The same with alcohol problems. People can never know.

The monsters can never be released. They can never be seen.

So the masks stay on. But sometimes they slip of, by accident. But they get right on afterwards. Like nothing ever happened. But the price for that little slip is high. People know.

Greg Sanders' slip turned out to be a fatal one.

It all started for a few years ago. He moved in with the most lovable guy possible, Nick Stokes. A guy who never did anything wrong, he was a CSI. He caught killers and rapists and put them behind bars. Or at least he helped the police putting them behind bars.

No one knew about their relationship, they kept it secret. Friends, coworkers and family. None of them knew. Couldn't know. So they both held their straight masks up. They might have been revealed, because they couldn't not exchange looks, touches, and the more or less innocent small kisses. But no one ever noticed them. It was a game to them. How long can we fool them, how long will it take before someone notices?

No one noticed that they took the same weekends off, no one noticed that their addresses became the same, and no one noticed the same colored cat fur on their clothes, or that they smelled the same.

It all started so well. The lab rat believed that he couldn't love someone higher than he loved Nick. And it seemed like Nick loved him just as much back.

But every relationship staggers sometimes, as did theirs. It started with something stupid. A simple mistake. No one's fault. Or maybe it was both of them. It really didn't matter. But things developed.

It was a sock. Greg had tossed one of his dirty socks on the bathroom floor Nick just had cleaned up. Nick had had a bad case, and was tired and annoyed even before he saw the orange sock on his very clean tiled floor.

"Greg!" Nick was going to fix this problem. He was tired of being the one who did cleaning all the time. He was going to make Greg pick up that sock even if he had to force the bastard himself. Nick found it ironic that Greg now was in the living room, watching some stupid show on the TV. His TV. In his apartment. Greg was currently sitting on his couch. He knew that they shared everything quite fair, but he was so just so tired of all this. It wasn't just socks Greg left on the floor.

"Yeah? Where are you Nick?" Greg entered the bathroom without noticing the danger he was in. he had a soda in his hand. A soda Nick had bought the other day. "Oh, there you are."

"I thought we talked about this a week ago, Greg!" Nick said angrily to Greg, and lifted the colorful sock so Greg could see what the problem was.

"Oh, yeah, I forgot that one. 'S no big deal, Nick. It's just a sock. Relax, man. Hey, what do you want for dinner tonight?" Nick's jaw clenched. It was always like this. It's no big deal, Nick. But it was.

"That was what you said last week too, and the time before that, and the time before that again. I'm beginning to get sick of all this, Greg. I'm the one who does all the cleaning, and you're the one who makes a mess of everything after I'm done."

Greg only looked at him funnily. "Well, I do at least just as much cleaning around here as you do, Mr. Stokes. I think you're being a little unreasonable right now." Nick threw the dirty sock at him, and they went into the living room again.

"I'm the unreasonable? It's not much I'm asking of you, Gregory! But you're never doing anything about it! You just keep living in your head, never really growing up! You just keep acting like a spoiled child who never really left his parents!" Gregory. Nick never called him that. Now he knew that Nick was pissed. Greg had no trouble when it came to money, his mother had worked with oil back home in Norway, and moved to the US with his dad so she could actually use her money. Her son got a big part of it, so she knew that he would make it even if they lived in separate countries from times to times. So Greg worked as a DNA tech, not because he needed the money, but because he liked the job, and because Nick also worked there. He could have worked many other places with much higher wages, but he still stayed, because he knew Nick wanted that.

"If this is about the money, just tell me. I can do things about that." Greg was hurt. Nick didn't usually have a problem with that. But he knew that Nick's pride had gotten a bit hurt when he figured out exact how much money Greg really had, but didn't use just because of him.

"It's not about the money, you moron, it's about your behavior! You're never growing up! You're never taking any responsibility! And I'm sick of it!"

"And you're always acing perfect, is that what you're saying? Because that's not true. You're the one who very often comes home all grumpy, tired and antisocial because you let a case get onto you. But I never complain! And here you are, complaining about a fucking sock? If that's so, then I'm not the only moron in here." Greg was pissed off.

"That's over the line, Greg!" Nick pointed a finger warningly at his now angry lover.

"No, it's not! Every time a kid has gotten killed or raped or robbed or whatever, you always come home all mad for nothing! And I can never do anything about it. I don't know how long I can take treatment like that, Nick!"

Kid who's gotten raped. That touched a nerve. Nick had never told Greg. He didn't need to know.

Nick exploded like he'd never done before. He wanted to leave, and never come back. Greg would manage without him. Greg didn't need him.

"You have no right, you motherfucker. No right! It's OVER" Greg shocked face was the last thing he saw before he found his keys and turned to leave the apartment. But his smaller boyfriend was faster than him, and blocked the doorway.

"Don't you leave me din helvetes jævla kuksuger, I won't let you!" Tears stung Greg's big, scared eyes.

Nick was now so angry that he went all calm. Greg might have believed that Nick wouldn't understand what he had said, but Nick had understood more than enough. "If I remember right, Greg, you're the one who sucks my cock."

And Nick's fist connected with Greg's jaw hard, so Greg fell unconscious down on the floor, and Nick left the apartment.

Nick lost his mask.

And it only got worse.