A cool breeze came in through your open window, carrying with it the smell of summer. You could hear the chirping of birds in the distance as you sat at the table and gazed into the deepness of the forest, an open book sprawled out in front of you.
It was mid-afternoon and the sun was bright, begging you to let it warm your skin with it's soft touch. Smiling to yourself, you stood up as you decided that a cup of your favourite tea would go so fittingly with this perfectly quite afternoon.
The gentle wind that came in intervals was inviting you into a journey as you watched the way the branches and leaves shook under it's strength. Maybe when the sun went down you would be able to step outside for a short while, escaping your confines for only a moment.
As you made your way back towards the table you felt a more powerful gust of wind come through the still open window, blowing the pages of your open book rapidly. You rushed yourself over, placing the cup of tea down as you attempted to regain your lost page quickly.
Sitting down as you concentrated, a flash of colour passed the corner of your eyes. You shot your head up and were met with another pair, small and black, staring curiously back into yours from the ledge of the window.
"Hello there. And where did you come from?" You smiled as you spoke to the small creature as it flapped it's bright coloured wings, inching forward with little hops. You placed your hand on the table in hopes of being able to hold the small bird for a while before it would decide to leave you alone once more.
A few louder chirps could be heard and before you knew it, your new friend had taken off. Had he been called back by his friends, perhaps? You couldn't help but giggle a little to yourself at the thought of their possible camaraderie.
The world was surprisingly simple, wasn't it? Things like friendship and family existed throughout nature time and time again.
It was only you that was the exception to that phenomenon, wasn't it? You were the strange one. Something that could not be understood.
Where other species found comfort in being together, you were here alone. A small house for one in the middle of the forest, as far away from anybody's attention as possible. There were no prying eyes or whispers here – just the solitude of the forest and your own thoughts.
Not once had anyone came to knock on the small, wooden door of the house you called home.
You took a sip of the tea you had been taught to make as a child, from a woman you had once referred to as your "mother". Whether that was the actual case or not, you were now unsure.
The warm liquid felt like silk as it traveled gently down your throat. A sharp contrast to the rough thoughts that plagued your mind once more on this average day.
"That kid – it's a damn monster!"
Regardless of the memories you held, the reality was that you now lived out your days in solitude. Sometimes you felt angry, enraged by the actions taken by the others around you. Sometimes you felt lonely, sadden by the look of fear on their faces.
And yet you had been the one to confine yourself here – this punishment was your own.
Because you understood.
You were the strange one. It was an issue too complicated for others to understand – hell, you didn't understand it yourself. But you knew that you were the one who needed to leave.
You remembered clearly the face of the man you had referred to as your "father". The kindness he had shown you and the warmth of his strong arms.
The pain in his eyes and the trembling of his hands.
"How could you bring that thing into our home? It's going to kill us!"
You were unsure of what it was that you were supposed to feel as you looked into your past.
You brought the cup once more to your lips and let the scent of your favourite concoction fill your nose and clear your head. You took another sip, focusing on the relaxing sensation that came with it.
You had already made your decision and it was much too late to turn back now. Not that you were able anymore, either.
For the fact that you were, undoubtedly, a monster was something you knew all too well yourself.
You had already resigned yourself to your self-imposed confinement as well as the loneliness that came with it. You now lived out your days here, gazing longingly out of the single window as you read the same few books you kept over and over again.
Hey Dad... Is it okay if I still want to see the world? Will you forgive me for holding onto these impossible dreams?
You ventured outside rarely, only free from your solitary for the moments that it took for you to stock up on water from the small river and gather what food you were able. They were simple, small moments of freedom and yet you treasured them all the same.
You stood up, pulling the window to a near close and tugging the curtains shut. Strange, wasn't it? That the frame you spent hours staring so longingly out of was such a clear reminder of the freedom you would never have. It was your biggest happiness and your worst nightmare in one.
With it's view blocked, however, you were able to lose yourself inside of your own fantasies for a while. You were able to pretend that your lone house was actually one of many in a simple neighborhood. You could pack a lunch for the picnic you and your childhood friend from the house over were planning or you could make dinner to surprise your father for when he came home from a long day of work in the evening.
As you sat around the dinner table you would speak of his troubles at work and the gossip from the old lady down the street. You would talk about your dreams of travelling the world; it's vast space yours to conquer. About how the future was still bright and so full of possibilities just lying in wait.
"Your future is waiting for you, _. You just have to be sure to open the door when it finally knocks."
"Maybe... knock..."
A small whisper cut into your thoughts suddenly causing you to snap your head up in alarm. Was that your imagination?
"Don't... signal..."
Had someone just been speaking?
You stood up in half panic, bumping your leg against the table as you rushed from your seat towards the door. You placed a ear against the wood, your palms already covered in a light layer of sweat.
You felt every thump of a fist against the wood as it resounded loudly through your ear.
Your eyes were wide as you backed away, frantically running your vision across all areas of the room.
What am I supposed to do?
With no other options you crawled, terrified, underneath the table you had just been sitting so peacefully at mere seconds ago. You had no time to clean the half-empty cup of tea as it had spilled over the table and created a small puddle at the base of furniture.
The deadly silence was interrupted by much-too-loud drip of the liquid as it fell past your vision. Curled up in the corner and frightened, your mind was racing.
It's too loud. They'll hear it. If I just put my hand out and catch the drops it'll be okay, right?
The sound of the a small drop of liquid that fell roughly onto the tip of your finger was drowned out by the loud creak of hinges as the door was opened.
Startled, you quickly pulled your hands back and over top of your mouth.
I have to calm down or they'll hear me. Breathe normal, me! Please!
From your position you could only just see the two sets of large boots as they made their way inside, pausing only for a moment. You could feel the way your body trembled and hoped that, for the sake of your life, the feet that stopped in front of you to inspect the spilled liquid would believe that you had escaped out of the window instead of cowering like a child down below.
The seconds that those legs stood in front of you were menacing by every definition of the word. Your breath caught and you didn't have the ability to close your widened eyes as you watched the man lean forward. His knees bend. His waist come into view followed quickly by his chest and arms.
A head of neat, blonde hair as he inspected the puddle before you.
You could feel the almost long forgotten sting of tears behind your eyes as you noticed his body tense and his gaze lift. A pair of deep, light blue eyes met your wide and trembling ones.
As he stared directly at you, you could feel the warmth of tears as they began to fall down your cheeks.
They found me. They're going to kill me. I'm so sorry, dad.
You vision blurred as you heard the sound of more footsteps making their way towards you. You shook your head, finally releasing your cries into an audible form as you wept into your knees.
"Hey, there's no need to be scared." A voice spoke from directly in front of you and you looked up into those same blue eyes once more. Through your watery vision you could see the makings of a small smile on his face as he outstretched an arm towards you. "Nobody will hurt you. Why not come on out from there?"
You shook your head once more, pushing yourself further against the hard wood of the walls.
"My name is Erwin Smith from the Survey Corps. You can trust me, _."
"H-how do you know my name?" Your voice shook as you spoke in surprise.
"Your father told me. Why don't we talk for a little while?" You blinked your eyes and saw clearly now the inviting smile he wore. It was the same as when the sun called you outside with it's warmth.
"My f-father? Then... you know what I am?" Your hand shook even more violently than your voice as you lifted it, stopping to question the man before you would accept his still outstretched palm.
"I do, _. I promise that no one will hurt you this time, either." With another flash a smile, the hand you held above his was taken into his grasp. "I'll protect you, _."
You nodded as he tugged on your hand, helping you stand as you crawled out of your hiding spot. You wiped your eyes once more on your sleeve, feeling a little less frightened at the mention of your father.
When you opened your eyes, however, you noticed the group of men that had entered your small home all staring directly at you and the fear quickly returned. You froze with your feet rooted in spot.
What do you want from me? Stop glaring at me like that!
Perhaps the man with the blue eyes took notice of your fear and he smiled down at you, giving a squeeze of your hand to remind you of his words. You hesitated, taking another look around the room, but his smile never wavered. You gave a small nod and he led you around the table, pulling the single chair out for you to sit on.
"Are you scared, _?" He spoke again as you stared up at him. You nodded. "I understand. We all are, though. So wouldn't it be better to live without that fear?"
What was he talking about? Of course it would be better if you could live without fear. You nodded once more.
"In order to do that, _, we need your help. Will you hear me out?" His blue eyes bore into you and you broke away, glancing once more around the room as your eyes landed on the still open door that the men had entered from.
"You just have to be sure to open the door when it finally knocks."
Did it still count if you weren't the one to open it?
You turned back and met his eyes once more. The man in front of you gave off an aura of strength. When you looked into those eyes, it was as if you truly had nothing to be afraid of anymore.
They held hope and expectation. They held strength and capability. Knowledge and freedom.
Reflected in those light blue eyes were all of the things you were in such desperate need of.
"I-I understand. Tell me how I can help."
A new SnK fic! I should probably move on already but I just can't seem to stop. This time it's Erwin x Titan!Reader - although that's probably obvious by now.
I don't know how often I will update this, honestly, since I can't say it's a huge priority just yet. But I will say that it's going to be a little AU since there is no Eren or any 104th squad at all. And it will without a doubt have angst because Erwin brings out the feels in me ;.; Regardless, I hope you will enjoy reading this chapter and I will try to set up a schedule for new chapters as soon as I can w