*Please note that in the following story, I am using my real name and the parts containing family situations are real. Please do not complain or make fun of it. Any offensive comments towards this story, I will not appreciate. Thank you. *
I absolutely hate winter. Even though I'm always cold because of my Raynaud's condition, I have my limits. Walking home from the bus, to me, is my favorite part of the day. I always listen to my music. Music to me is my escape from reality. Think of it as therapy. Anyways, I'm walking home from the bus with my music softly playing through my earphones: the theme from the film Castaway. Since its winter, there are flurries of snow falling and when you have that happen and the main theme from Castaway playing, its somber and enchanting. My feet quietly crunch in the snow-covered road. The wind gently whips my dark brown hair around and I feel my face slowly start to go numb. I'm so immersed in my music and thoughts that I don't hear nor notice a vehicle coming from behind me. It stops in the middle of the road and I am startled. It's a silver Pontiac. I, however, don't realize who it was until I see there is no driver. I do a double-take.
"Jazz?"
"Hey lil' lady!" I smiled. Jazz is my favorite Autobot and seeing him come visit me makes my day.
"What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be on a mission today?" I ask. It's not like I don't mind him being here, it's the fact that he could be helping the others but I feel like I'm a slight burden on him sometimes.
"Nah, Prime cleared meh to come an' see my favorite person. Get in, Ah bet you're freezin'." The passenger side door opens and I climb in. The heater turns on and I feel my numb face and toes again. Jazz's holoform turns on.
"Thanks, Jazz."
"It's nothin'. How are ya? It's been a while." He asks. I'm quiet, unsure how to answer. My parents had gotten divorced and now we're moving again, for the third time. This time, my younger brother is planning on staying with my dad. I hadn't told any of the 'bots. It isn't my place to add more to their plate of saving the world. But, Jazz is my best friend. It would be wrong not to tell him. I have emotional issues, stemming from my dad. This makes it hard for me to speak out.
"Dee, are ya alrigh'?"
I have to tell him.
"No, Jazz. I'm-I'm.." I am not able to form the words that so desperately want to come out. I fiddle with my rubber band that is around my wrist to ease my anxiety. Jazz eases to a stop and he ushers me out. Seconds later, Jazz is in his bipedal form, crouching to look at me with worry and concern.
"What's on your mind, Dee?" I blurt it out.
"We're moving again. I really don't want to but mom can't pay the rent anymore and Dominic is looking to stay with the man who caused this whole screw-up." I start to cry. I don't want to leave Jazz and the others!
"Oh, Dee. Don' cry! Come 'ere sweetspark." I feel myself being picked up. I am in Jazz's servos and being cradled.
"Why didn' ya tell me or da others?" He asks as he sadly looks me.
"I didn't want to dump my problems on you all. I mean, you have to deal with the Decepticons and saving the world!" I blubber out, my body shaking. Jazz forces me to look at him.
"Sweetspark, it hurts meh tha' ya don' tell meh 'bout this. Don' think fo' a minute tha' ya are a burden on us! Yo're more than dat. Keepin' yor feelings bottled up like dat ain't good for ya."
"But I am! I don't do anything right!" I exclaim. I am practically in a frenzy at this point. My nose is running from the cold and my antics. I am a failure. I can't do anything right to please anyone.
Jazz stares down at me with his optics intently and frowns before saying something in his com link.
3rd POV
:: Optimus, are ya busy?::
:: No, Jazz. Why? Is something wrong? ::
:: Ya remember I went to see Dee? ::
:: Yes. ::
:: Well, she just told me some news dat she ain't taking well an' she didn' tell meh or any of us 'cuz she didn' want to burden us with her situation. Ah told her dat wasn' da case at all an' said she wasn a burden. But she said she was. ::
:: I understand. How is she right now? ::
:: She's upset and cryin'. Boss bot, I think she needs ya right now. Someone needs to talk some sense into her. ::
:: I am on my way. Stay with her, Jazz. ::
:: Ah ain't goin' anywhere. ::
And with that the com link ends and Jazz looks back at his charge and best friend. It pains him to see her this way. Ever since her parents divorced, she had gotten less social and didn't talk to anyone about it. Her mother told him she was going to group sessions to cope but… Jazz shakes his head. Where in Primus' name did Dee get the thought that she was a burden and imperfect? Soon, his charge wasn't telling him anything about it. It worried him to the point where he did' know what to do. That's why he com linked Optimus. Now, he was trying to comfort Dee while he waited for the Prime to arrive. Within minutes, a red and blue flamed semi pulled up and transformed where the two were.
My POV
My eyes were red and puffy from all the crying I did.
"Deanna." A calm and baritone voice said. I looked around Jazz and see Optimus. I sent Jazz a look that said Why did you call him? I sniffled and looked at my feet, avoiding the leader's gaze.
"Why do you believe you are a burden that you do not confide in any of us?" he asked.
"Because it's true." Was my simple reply. There was an eerie silence that followed, nothing but the whistling of the wind and the swirling of the snow. I stared out onto the nearly frozen lake. My mind had been plagued with memories I wished to be forgotten. Somethings I just couldn't change. My mom always told me that she felt sorry for me because I didn't really have a male role model around. My two uncles never contacted me. My brothers and grandfathers didn't bother with me as if I was invisible. The only person I had at the moment was my mom.
"You know that that is not true. You are not a burden to anyone. What makes you think that you are?" Optimus asked.
"My dad." I replied. Optimus's eyes showed sadness as he heard my answer. I couldn't look at him and not cry.
"My dad thinks I'm a failure. He doesn't think I'm good enough to be forensic scientist because I'm getting a B/B- in a class elective of forensics. You know what he said? 'You might want to rethink your major if you're not going to take the class seriously.' Yet if my brother gets a C in art, he's a better child. He doesn't come to my competitions. He doesn't go to majority of my soccer games. He mentally scarred me when I was 14 and he didn't care." I told Optimus, who silently listened. I looked at him with tears slowly traveling down my cheek.
"It's his fault he's an alcoholic. He doesn't care if he hurts us." I huff in frustration. Optimus gently places his finger under my chin and lifts my face up. I'm forced to look into blue calming eyes.
"In my eyes, you are an amazing child. You bring out the joy in others when there is sadness. You bring hope when there is despair. I see nothing but a caring and kind child. Do not think for a moment that you are a burden or useless." Optimus said. By this point, I'm crying and fumbling around with my jacket. I was unsure what to say or do. I wipe my eyes of tears and look to Jazz, who looks at me with a smile on his face. I try to smile back but my face is too cold from the wind. Talking with Optimus made me feel a bit better. But the way he showed concern for me made me wonder why he was so much more of a father to me than my actual dad? Optimus was the leader of the Autobots and he found time to speak with me about my situation! He was this caring and understanding person when I needed it the most. A thought came to my mind, but I was unsure whether or not to ask Optimus. He started to transform back to his alt mode, and his holoform activated in the driver's seat.
"Um, Optimus?" I hesitantly asked. I didn't want to prolong his drive back to base but I didn't know when I would see him again. There was a short moment of silence before Optimus replied.
"Yes, Deanna?"
"I want to ask if you could, um, be my, uh…" I stumbled over the words I wanted to come out. I felt so stupid. It's just Optimus. As I struggled to ask my request, his holoform stepped out of the cab and came over to me. And then, Optimus's response surprised me.
"I would be honored."
Wait, what? Somehow, he knew what I was going to ask and he said yes. Before I could get a word out of my mouth, I immediately flung my arms around the holoform's waist in a hug tightly. Optimus's eyes shone bright with pride and happiness as he returned the hug. Suddenly, out of nowhere, I heard:
"Aw! Group hug!"
I felt another pair of arms wrap around me.
"Jazz!" I exclaimed.
"What? Don' tell meh ya didn't want the Jazzman to hug ya too!" was his sassy remark. I rolled my eyes as I released my arms from Optimus and I felt Jazz do the same. Optimus chuckled at our antics and knelt in front of me.
"If there's anything you need, I won't be far away." He said and I nodded and smiled. Optimus smiled back and his holoform slowly disappeared. His alt mode's engine rumbled to life and as he turned the corner to leave, he blew his horn. I waved goodbye and I was left with Jazz, who then transformed into his alt mode. The passenger door opened and I climbed in, the seatbelt wrapping around me snuggly. As we headed home, Jazz turned on the radio and the words from the band The 1975 flowed through. I smiled at the thought of the words.
Well I know when you're around 'cause I know the sound
I know the sound, of your heart
Well I know when you're around 'cause I know the sound
I know the sound, of your heart