Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight Characters.
A/N: Yup, here with a new update to a new story. I've always wondered what Edward heard when he spied on Bella in the begining--so I came up with this! Review Please!
Edward:
I knew what I was doing was what Carlisle considered wrong. I shouldn't be sneaking to Chief Swan's house of all places—and to go spy on his daughter of all people. I could almost hear Carlisle's tone of voice in my head.
God, what a monster I was.
I opened the door silently and crept to the staircase. I could hear Charlie snoring from down the hall. I reached the door to what I assumed was her door. Bella's door.
She was sleeping silently; her blankets bunched down at her knees, and she was shivering. The room was cold for a human.
I stood, looming over her for a few moments, wondering, contemplating if pulling the blanket up over her would be a good idea. Finally, I grabbed the blankets quickly—my lightning speed hands moving so quickly as not to disturb her. She simply pulled on the blankets as I brushed them over her shoulders, and turned onto her side.
I couldn't do anything that would jeopardize the knowledge that I was there. She couldn't just wake up and find me sitting in her room.
My family and I would defiantly have to move then.
What was it about her that I found so irresistible, that here I was…sitting here. Watching her sleep. Watching her dream away her nights. It wasn't her blood that drew me to her; No, not this night.
I had gained some control over that hunger.
Was I truly attracted to her? After all these years; after all the possible people, the easier scenarios… was it really to this girl, that I lost my heart to?
I heard her sigh a name, but I couldn't make it out. Was it Jacob? I felt my breath hitch. She had seen that boy?
He knew…too much for his own good.
He knew things that he didn't even understand. He was still young.
But I had a very bad gut feeling about him. Something in the back of my mind told me that my journey with Jacob Black and his family was not over.
No, not by a long shot.
Bella tossed and turned again; the blankets pushed to the side and her little whimpers of fear filled the room. I wanted to know what she was dreaming about. What was it that haunted her dreams?
"Edward!" She shouted. If I still had a heart, I knew that it would have stopped just then. "No! Edward!" She tried again, reaching into the air for an imaginary person.
But…that person was supposed to be me.
She was reaching for me.
Why me?
I thought she hated me after the way I treated her. I deserved to not be talked to…though, I knew she was curious about me.
Just as I was curious about her.
"Bella…" I whispered against her ear. "I'm here." She tossed her head, looking worried. Lost.
"Don't leave…" She begged. It sounded like she was about to cry.
Dear…sweet… my Bella.
The words just slipped in and out of my mind. There was no controlling or handling it.
This girl. This Bella…
Was My Bella.
"I will never leave your side, Bella. Unless you wish it." I whispered again, talking into the deep darkness. I knew that she hadn't heard me, and it was probably better that way. I didn't want her messing up her life…giving up her life…for a thing like me.
Someone that could never give her what she most wholly deserved.
Her body seemed to stop trembling, and she sighed—contented.
"Edward." She whispered again. I must have done something good in her dream.
I would be someone good in her dreams…but in reality…
I could never be what she deserved.
I knew I had to go before her dream ended. I couldn't stand here all night and listen to her—even though I enjoyed it very much.
"Goodnight, my Bella." I whispered again, wondering if I should chance it and kiss her lightly on the forehead.
I decided that it was best if I left her alone completely. The only way I would ever get involved with her…is if she wanted me around.
The dream Edward, and the real one were two different people.
I just prayed for a moment that she would be blind, and love me despite my faults.