For Old Time's Sake (part three)
(a.k.a. The One Just By Cath #3)
I would suggest that you read parts one and two (found at http://www.geocities.com/jellybaby_babe/old_times_sake.htm and http://www.geocities.com/jellybaby_babe/old_times_sake2.htm respectively) before you read this installment.
Same disclaimers apply.
However I would like to add that although I did try to do extensive research (well, half an hours worth…) I have never been to New York and so I don't know the geography at all and therefore have only used places I've heard of. So if they do seem to have to go ridiculous distances to get somewhere don't blame me…. However if you can help out to make it become more accurate, I'd be very much appreciative.
Also it may get a bit mushy, but that was unfortunately unavoidable given the story line, and I did have to get a bit drunk in order to be able to tackle the mushy bits which will make them more mushy, which I hope makes sense…
Well, here we go…
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2 years later…
The plane from Seattle landed at New York's JFK airport at 13:55 - 17 minutes late by Monica's estimation.
She had been on edge ever since she had received the call 4 hours ago from her brother, unable to keep still throughout the flight in anxious anticipation.
She exited the plane quickly, dodging other passengers and trying her best not to hit them with her bag.
She only had her hand luggage and so she was not kept waiting at the luggage claim, which would have been unbearable for her. She walked out into the arrivals lounge to be greeted by thousands of relatives and friends of people that she did not, and probably never would, know. A sea of faces that she quickly surveyed to see whether there was anyone she might recognize. There was not.
Quickly she pulled her bag further up her shoulder to prevent it from falling as it had threatened, and she walked through the doors into the outside world.
She stood in line impatiently waiting for a taxi before she heard the voice behind her.
"Monica! Monica!" Chandler called out, breathless from a chase that had continued from arrivals.
"Chandler?" She asked when she finally realized that there was someone calling her.
"They sent me to get you." He explained when he finally caught his breath. "This way." He motioned as he pulled her out of the ever-increasing queue.
They walked quickly, her following him, as she was unaware as to where they were going.
"When did you get here?" Monica asked.
"About two hours ago. When I got to the hospital they told me that you were going to be coming in about now so I offered to find you."
Monica nodded, and finally saw where they were headed.
A new silver Lincoln was parked in front of them, and Chandler searched his pockets to find the keys before opening the car. "It's a rental." He explained unnecessarily.
He opened the back door and put Monica's bag on the seat before entering the car himself. Monica followed suit, and they were soon headed out of the airport car park and onto the open road.
They arrived shortly at Beth Israel Medical Center and Chandler parked the car. They exited with some speed, and set about trying to find a way into the hospital and to the waiting room where their friends and family were gathered.
They finally arrived after some difficulty and several sets of directions from less than helpful hospital staff.
They opened the doors to find Monica's parents, Phoebe, John and Rachel's parents all gathered anxiously.
"Monica! It's so nice to see you again." Judy Geller exclaimed, giving her daughter a hug.
Monica smiled, and went on to greet her father.
"Hey Dad."
"My little Harmonica!" He greeted her, giving her a hug, which Monica accepted, only mildly embarrassed.
"It's like a Geller family reunion." Phoebe commented. "I want to be part of it." She said with a slight pout.
"Hey Pheebs!" Monica greeted her friend, who immediately cheered up.
The reunion carried on in a similar fashion until everyone had been spoken to.
Monica then sat down on one of the uncomfortable hard plastic chairs that were situated in the waiting room.
"So what's the latest news?" Monica asked after a while.
"The doctors think it could be a while yet, but she's doing fine." Judy said, sitting down next to her daughter.
At that moment, Ross entered the room with Jessica in tow. He immediately noticed the presence of his sister.
"Monica! You got here finally!" He exclaimed, and as before with the others, greeted her with a hug.
"Hi Auntie Monica." Jessica said when her father was finished.
"Hey Jess. Wow, you've grown up so quickly! You're so big!" Monica commented.
Jessica smiled.
"Anyway, is it okay if Jessica stays here now?" Ross asked everyone. There was a general consensus of yes, and so he then crouched down and spoke to his daughter. "Jess, I'm going to go see mommy now, can you stay here for me?"
Jessica nodded, as if this was a big responsibility. "Thank you." Ross said, "Monica, do you want to join me?"
"Sure I'd love to." Monica replied, following her brother out of the door.
Jessica left to make the decision of who to go to, chose Chandler, who had been sitting next to Monica, and made her way slowly towards him, and then climbed onto his lap.
"Hey Jess." He welcomed her. She held out a book for him.
"Read." She instructed and Chandler, given no option, did as was told.
Monica entered the stark white room after Ross had held the door open for her. She peered in to be greeted by Rachel, who was lying fairly comfortable on the hospital bed. Rachel made a motion for Monica to sit on the side of the bed, whilst Ross closed the door behind him, telling them that he'd wait outside for a minute.
Monica sat anxiously on the edge of the bed. "So, how are you?" She asked tentatively.
"Fine." Rachel replied, rolling her eyes. "I'm already so bored by sitting here though. I could have to wait hours yet, it was 18 for Jess."
"Rather you than me." Monica said smiling, although her eyes betrayed her, and portrayed her true feelings.
Rachel's hand moved over to hold Monica's and gave it a quick reassuring squeeze. "You'll get your chance." She said quietly. "Just stay with me for a few contractions and you'll soon never ever want children." She said more jovially, attempting to lighten the atmosphere of the room.
Monica laughed, although it came out a little forced. "Don't hold me to that, okay?" She said with a slight grin.
"So, how are things?" Rachel asked.
Monica pondered over that a while, unsure as to what aspect of her life exactly Rachel was referring to. "Fine." She said in the end, unwilling to commit herself to anything more than that before she knew what Rachel wanted exactly.
"Fine?" Rachel questioned. "What about you and Chandler?" She asked with an almost evil smile.
"What about Chandler and I?" Monica asked quickly and maybe a little too sharply for her own liking.
"Well, he was telling us earlier how you've been phoning and writing to each other for months now, and he did offer to pick you up from the airport. In fact practically begged to pick you up from the airport." She amended.
Monica smiled in spite of herself, only to then remember to cover it up when Rachel looked at her not so questioningly. "I…I…I knew nothing about that. We're friends. Just friends." She said adamantly, but the minute she turned away from Rachel a smile tugged at the corners of her mouth in an almost hopeful gesture.
"So you've got no gossip at all?" Rachel complained. "At least let me use that to amuse myself, I've been sat on my butt for too many months now with nothing to do, I was hoping that you might tell me something interesting. Boyfriend? Hell, girlfriend?" Rachel asked almost pleadingly, Monica laughing, but shaking her head at each suggestion.
Ross chose that moment to reappear, and started fussing around Rachel as soon as her came within reach. "Ice chips? Water? Anything?" He asked, Rachel rolling her eyes at Monica, and shaking her head at Ross.
"Honey, I've got the epidural, I'm fine." She insisted to unwilling ears.
"Anyway, I'd better get back to the others." Monica said, feeling slightly like a third wheel.
Ross started to fluff Rachel's pillows, and fuss over her more. "Don't leave me here with him, Mon!" Rachel begged; Monica laughed, and Ross pretended to be offended.
"I'll be back." Monica promised before exiting the room and rejoining the others in the waiting room.
The waiting room exerted an atmosphere of both anxiety and boredom. Jessica by now was asleep on Chandler's lap, Chandler looking desperate at the idea of not being able to move.
"Could you possibly take her off me, Mon?" He asked, motioning to the sleeping form on his lap.
Monica shook her head. "Nope, you have to pay the price of being the favored 'uncle'." She told him, and smiled almost evilly.
"Urgh!" Phoebe complained quite suddenly, "I'm so bored!"
There was a general acknowledgment of Phoebe's point of view, but no one seemed particularly interested in alleviating it.
Monica, who was sat next to Chandler, rested her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes. Chandler was less than receptive to this idea. "Nu huh." He said, moving his shoulder a bit so Monica wouldn't get to comfortable. "I'm not having the both of you sleep on me."
Monica made no comment, just looked at him pleadingly.
Chandler gave in. "Okay, okay, but just for you."
Monica resumed the position as Joey and Sarah burst into the room, and everyone's eye strayed towards the movement.
"Is there any news?" Joey asked excitingly.
There was a general murmur of 'no' before people looked away, and Joey seemed disappointed. He sat down, Sarah following his example.
"And there's been no news now for 4 hours." Phoebe complained, not really aimed at Joey in particular, more anyone who was interested enough to listen. Which was almost no one.
At that moment Ross decided to re-join them.
Everyone looked up at him in anticipation as he opened the door.
"No news yet." He said, and everyone groaned. "I'm just gonna take Jessica off to see her mommy." Jessica was just stirring, and so he felt less guilty about removing her from her position on Chandler's lap. Chandler let out a sigh of relief as soon as she went out the door, and started to move his limbs in exaggeration, which did nothing to please Monica particularly.
"I'm gonna go to the cafeteria." Monica announced eventually, after deciding that there was no way that she could sleep under the circumstances, and there was nothing else to do. "Anyone care to join me?"
Chandler started to get up, stretching out. "I'll come." He offered, but no one else seemed to be all that bothered.
They walked together almost in silence until they reached their destination. Monica and Chandler both purchased themselves a coffee, and Monica also bought herself a muffin, having not eaten in a good few hours.
They sat down in the almost empty cafeteria, near a window, and as far away from anyone else in the place as possible.
Chandler blew on his coffee. "Did you ever see us going through this?" He asked seriously.
"What, sitting in a cafeteria, drinking coffee and waiting for Rachel to give birth?" Monica asked, confused. "We're kinda doing it now if you hadn't noticed."
"Ha ha, very funny." Chandler laughed sarcastically. "I mean the whole baby thing. You and I, I mean." He said, starting to say more, but decided against it, and went silent, embarrassed almost.
Monica thought over this for a while. She wasn't sure what to say, so in the end she opted for the truth. "Yes." She said slowly. "At some point, anyway. When we were both ready…which unfortunately never happened." She continued almost regretfully. "Why, did you have ideas about our future? Marriage? Kids?"
Chandler did not hesitate as Monica had, knowing full well his answer. "Yes, I did. I just can't believe that we never got round to it." He said truthfully.
"So, why didn't you and Phillipa have children?" Monica asked, before deciding it might be a little intrusive. "You don't have to answer that."
Chandler answered though. "It was another of those, we can do it later things. But as it turned out, later never happened." He paused. "And in a way I'm glad for it. It would have been much worse going through a divorce with children involved as well."
They sat again in silence, pondering the questions and answers over in their minds.
"So, you still up for the 40 thing?" Chandler asked semi-jokingly, breaking the silence.
"The 40 thing?" Monica asked questioningly.
"Yeah, you know, when we're 40 get married and have a baby. Do you not remember?"
Monica laughed. "I can't believe I'd forgotten about that." She exclaimed. "Sure why not, it's not as if I've had any better offers recently." She said, still laughing.
Chandler pretended to look hurt. "Well, thanks, I'll keep that in mind."
Monica gave him a hug. "Aww poor baby." She said mockingly.
"Anyway, we'd better get back." Monica said looking at her watch, and then breaking the hug, which had lasted, some might think, rather longer than it ought.
As they were arriving back at the waiting room, Ross, who was running towards them, happy, but rather exhausted looking met them.
Monica opened the door, Chandler and her entering before Ross followed behind.
The room went silent, rather more in honor of Ross' presence rather than that of Chandler or Monica.
Everyone looked at him again in anticipation.
He paused a few seconds, which to Monica seemed to drag on forever.
"It's a boy!" He announced, and all hell broke loose in the room. Cheering, shouting, jumping, hugging and general congratulations all in one second.
"Any names yet?" Someone asked loudly.
"Ask Rachel about that one." Ross said back, and everyone laughed.
Everyone wanted to go see Rachel and the new baby at once, but both Ross and Rachel had already decided to let them both have a quick rest before family visited first.
About 30 minutes later Monica entered the Rachel's room followed closely by Chandler.
Rachel eyed him suspiciously. "I thought only family were allowed in?"
"I'm your brother in law." Chandler said unconvincingly. "Remember Mon and my wedding last fall? With the big brass band and the …dancing monkeys?"
Both Monica and Rachel looked at him. "I don't see Monica going for the monkeys somehow." Rachel pointed out. Whilst Monica said, "Sounds like one hell of a wedding, why wasn't I invited?"
But then both Rachel and Monica laughed and allowed Chandler to stay.
Then Monica noticed the tiny baby sleeping happily in Rachel's arms. "Aunt Monica, Uncle Chandler, meet Jack." Rachel introduced them.
"He's adorable, Rach." Monica said. "Can I hold him?" She asked hopefully.
"Of course." Rachel agreed, handing over her son.
"Named after Dad?" Monica asked taking hold of the small infant. Rachel nodded.
Chandler watched the scene all the time thinking about their conversation in the cafeteria and thinking lots of nice thoughts about him and Monica and little adorable children, all cute and all his and Moni…
"Chandler? Chandler?" Rachel brought him out of his reverie.
Chandler shook his head momentarily as if trying to focus by clearing the images out of his mind. "Sorry." He apologized, and Rachel repeated her question.
"Do you want to hold him?" She asked, and it was then that he noticed that Monica was staring at him, her grin not quite as well hidden as she might have liked.
"Sure…sure." He said, before Monica passed over the baby to him. He held the boy in his arms, and the thoughts from just seconds ago reappeared suddenly in his mind.
Monica was thinking similar thoughts, thinking about what would have happened if she and Chandler had had children. She thought, with no real reason for doing so, that Chandler would be a good father, the sort of man she would like to father her chi…. She stopped mid-thought. It was no good thinking about these things now, she chided herself; you're only about 6 years late.
Chandler rambled incoherently to the baby; the baby not quite sure of what was going on.
Eventually Chandler passed the baby back to his mother, as other people were anxious to see them.
"We'd better let some other people see you." He said, and Monica nodded in agreement.
"You're going home tomorrow, right?" Monica asked.
"Yeah. You'll come visit then?" Rachel asked eagerly.
Monica nodded, and Chandler remained silent, unsure as to whether this invitation was including him or not.
"You too, Chandler?" Rachel asked, understanding his silence.
"Sure, I'd love to." He replied. "Phone me when you think you're ready for me. You've got my cell number, right?" Rachel nodded. Chandler leaned over and kissed Rachel on the cheek and gave her a hug before exiting the room.
"Where are you staying tonight?" Rachel asked Monica, who had remained in the room briefly to say her own goodbye.
"I have no idea. I hadn't thought about it." She admitted. "I supposed I'll ask mom and dad, but I think it might be more fun to stay in a hotel for a few nights."
"Chandler's staying at the Grand Hyatt." She told Monica.
"And I care about that why?" Monica asked.
Rachel said nothing, but merely smiled.
Monica gave her a reproving look, then gave her a quick kiss on the cheek, and hugged her as Chandler had done.
"I'll see you tomorrow." Monica said before leaving the room.
Nearly 1 hour later Monica booked herself into the Grand Hyatt hotel. She reasoned with herself that it had nothing to do with Chandler and merely the close proximity to both Ross and Rachel and her parent's house was its selling point.
It was past 5 o'clock when Monica had finally settled in her room, her few clothes stacked away neatly in the wardrobe and drawers. She looked at her watch. She was due at her parent's house for dinner in an hour and a half.
It wasn't going to take her that long to get ready. She played with the idea of finding out which room Chandler was in but decided against it as it might seem slightly too obvious, where as if she 'discovered' that they were staying in the same hotel whilst in conversation at her parent's it might not quite look as though she was stalking him.
Instead she settled on half an hour of TV. There wasn't anything of particular interest on, and so Monica's mind wandered over the background of some cookery show. She wasn't sure as of yet how long she would be staying, the restaurant where she worked had agreed that she could have a few days off, only after she had filled them in on the details, and they were still a bit unsure. Maybe tomorrow before going to Rachel's she could go shopping. Buy something for the baby, some new clothes for herself, a birthday present for her mother, although this was less urgent as she did have a month to find something.
At 6 o'clock Monica decided that she ought to start getting ready. She took a shower, glad to get rid of the dirt accumulated over the day and find herself in some fresh clean clothes.
She dried her hair, did her make up and before she knew it, it was time to leave.
She made sure that she had everything, especially her room key, and made her way down to the lobby where she quite literally bumped into Chandler.
At first she didn't realize who it was, and so made some apologies without looking up.
Chandler made a half hearted notion to accept the apology, looking at Monica with a small smile, then looking down at the letter in his hand before double taking and realizing who it was that had run into him. "Monica?" He asked, shaking his head in disbelief. "Of all the hotels…" He commented, smiling.
Monica, who had by now realized who he was, smiled back. "Are you going to my mom and dad's now?" She asked.
Chandler nodded.
"Well, shall we walk together?" She asked, hoping that she wouldn't come across as desperate.
"Sure, that sounds like a good idea." He agreed, folding up the piece of paper and placing it in his coat pocket. Monica wondered what this letter could be, but said nothing about it.
They arrived at her parent's house laughing and joking just after they were scheduled to do so.
The other guests, including Joey, Sarah, Phoebe, John and Jessica had already arrived and several looked questioningly to Monica and Chandler as they entered, but Monica and Chandler were oblivious to the looks.
After half an hour the guests all went to help themselves to a buffet dinner. After getting her food, Monica sat subconsciously rather close to Chandler on the sofa.
"I didn't know you were going out with Chandler again." Judy asked Monica when Chandler had left to go to the bathroom.
Monica looked perplexed. "I'm not." She said.
Phoebe, who had heard the conversation, took her turn to look confused. "You're not? So why are you two acting like that?" She asked.
"Like what?" Monica asked, but the conversation was terminated when Chandler arrived back.
"Talking about me again?" Chandler asked jokingly as he noticed the immediate silence.
"No, I was just saying that it was about time Monica got married." Judy lied and then walked off towards her husband.
Monica shot her a look, which went unnoticed. "And I was saying stay out of my business." Monica said quietly to her mother's retreating figure.
"She bothering you again?" Chandler asked, worriedly, giving her a quick hug.
Phoebe gave Monica a meaningful look, which Monica deciphered as the sort of action that had made people think they were dating again. At this realization Monica pulled away. Chandler looked confused at the sudden change of sentiment, but before he could say anything, Jessica ran up to him and jumped on his lap, Chandler only just able to prevent his food from falling off the plate.
"Uncle Chandler!" She shouted. Chandler grinned, but said nothing. "Look what Grandpa got me!" She exclaimed, showing him a Barbie doll.
Chandler made several impressed sounds before saying. "That's really nice, Jess."
Monica sat looking at the pair in silence while they continued their conversation. She thought again back to the conversation that they had shared in the cafeteria. She had never realized until now how much she wanted that. How much she had wanted that, she mentally corrected herself, it wasn't as if she wanted a life with Chandler now…did she?
Phoebe interrupted any further thoughts on the subject. "Monica, are you still with us?" She asked waving her hand in front of Monica's eyes.
"Sure, I was just thinking."
Phoebe followed Monica's eyes towards Chandler and Jessica, who had moved from their original position, and were now on the other side of the room playing with Jessica's toys, which were spread haphazardly in one corner.
"Anything you want to share with the rest of the class?"
"Not really." Monica said.
But Phoebe wouldn't take no for an answer. "Tell." She instructed.
"You promise you won't laugh or tell anyone?" Monica asked.
"Cross my heart and hope to die." Phoebe promised. "Well, not really, cos I'd never want to die but…"
"Yeah, I get the idea." Monica told her before she went into a long-winded explanation as to what she really meant. "I was just thinking about Chandler and me." She explained.
"Well, duh. It's kinda obvious." She said. "What exactly about you and Chandler?" She asked after a pause.
But Monica had decided to tell no more and left it as it was. She wasn't sure that she really wanted to tell anyone that she thought that she might be falling in love with Chandler again. Well, not exactly falling in love, that was a bit too strong, and besides she was only building on pre-existing feelings towards him, which were strong enough previously to think almost constantly about a future with him. She shook her head, and wondered if she'd lost it, trying to reason with herself about her feelings, if any, towards Chandler.
Later found Monica walking outside towards the wooden bench stood outside her parent's house.
She sat down, marveling at the darkness and the quiet.
The moon was hidden by a thick covering of clouds which added to the darkness and at this time of night no one had need to venture outside, contriving in an almost complete silence.
She sat there a while, thinking and, as recently had so often been the case, her thoughts trailed in one particular direction.
Back in Seattle when she had felt lonely, or even just in times like these, she had often felt solace in picking up the phone and calling him. They'd speak for hours, talking about what they had been up to recently; joking and laughing like friends. Best friends Monica sometimes ventured to hope.
It had taken a long, long time, but finally Monica at least felt that they were back to where they'd been before their relationship. It scared Monica in a way especially as this was practically the place she'd been in 10 years ago. 10 years on and still no progress. Well, okay she'd moved across the country, but what else had she done? Where had she been half her life? No wonder her mother never thought she'd amount to much.
She was so lost in thought that she didn't hear him approach.
"Can I sit down?" Chandler asked her.
"What?" Monica asked in confusion before realizing what he'd said. "Oh, yeah, sure."
"We thought you'd got yourself lost." Chandler said, sitting himself next to Monica.
Monica smiled "No, I was just sitting here thinking."
Chandler looked at her almost hopefully. "Anything you need help with?"
Monica shook her head. "Just something I've got to sort out myself."
Chandler looked slightly crestfallen, so Monica elaborated on some of what was on her mind. "I was just thinking that maybe my mother is right. Perhaps I'll never do anything with my life."
"But you've already done plenty." Chandler argued.
"Like what?" Monica asked.
Chandler thought for a while. "You've got a good job," he started. "You're happy."
"Am I though?" Monica questioned. "I've not got any of what I really wanted. I'm not married, I've got no children, and I don't enjoy my job all that much."
Chandler had no reply for that but instead said "And what about me? What have I done? Yeah I've been married, but how long did that last? I've got no kids, and the only thing in my life at the moment is…" he seemed to have to think about this before deciding quite what to say. "…Is my job, and I'm moving with that so even that won't be much fun. Not that it is at the moment."
"You're moving?" Monica asked astonished, wondering why he had not divulged this information sooner.
"Possibly." He said before continuing. "Probably." He paused. "That letter I had earlier? It said there was a promotion for me if I wanted it. They want me to move back here, to New York."
"Are you going to?" Monica asked intrigued.
"I don't know. I'm going to think about it definitely, but whether I can live here again…" He trailed off.
Monica shivered in the cold night air.
"C'mon." Chandler said, standing up. "It's getting cold out here, let's go back in." He waited for Monica to join him and eventually she did. Chandler put his arm around her as though trying to make her warm. It didn't work, but Monica didn't complain. They arrived shortly back at the house and on entering Monica noticed that most of the guests had left since she had been outside; and the rest seemed about to leave.
"I guess we ought to go soon, then." Monica suggested, a little disappointed as a quick glance at her watch had told her it was still quite early.
"Maybe we could stop by the bar at the hotel?" Chandler said, obviously thinking similar things as Monica. Monica nodded her agreement.
They gathered their belongings, said a quick goodbye to Monica's parents and left, walking slowly towards the hotel.
The bar was quite full when they arrived, but they still managed to find 2 seats together, although a little squashed.
They sat down and ordered their drinks before attempting to start a conversation between themselves, but to little avail.
"It's a bit crowded in here, isn't it?" Monica complained after apologizing for what seemed like the hundredth time to the person sitting next to her for elbowing them when she took a sip of drink.
"Finish your drink and then come up to mine." Chandler suggested, shouting over the din.
Monica looked at him and raised her eyebrows.
"It's not like that." Chandler protested. "We can watch TV or something, it'll be less crowded is all."
Monica made no comment, bored by trying to be heard and having to repeat herself, and so merely did as was asked.
She finished her drink, Chandler doing the same, and then followed, well more like was pulled by, Chandler out of the bar.
They reached Chandler's room a short while later and Monica as invited to do so, sat down on the bed and attempted to make herself comfortable whilst Chandler rummaged around in the mini bar before producing a rather sizable bottle of vodka. He poured some into the 2 plastic cups on the table and handed one to Monica.
"Lemonade, orange?" He offered, but Monica declined both, and downed the proffered alcohol in one gulp.
Chandler just looked at her in almost disbelief before doing the same himself.
"More?" He asked. Monica nodded and held her cup out whilst Chandler poured.
This continued for some time amidst chatting happily away, more and more merry.
At about 12 o'clock Monica refused to drink more and insisted she go back to her room. However upon attempting to stand she found her legs refusing to cooperate as she sank to the floor in a fit of giggles. Chandler helped her stand, although he was in a state not dissimilar to her own, and so walking back to her room was not going to happen.
Monica sat herself again on his bed, still giggling. "Well I'll just have to stay here then." She said, stumbling across the words and not sounding half as upset about the idea as she should have.
Suddenly she leaned over to Chandler who was sitting very close to her and kissed him quickly on the lips. They both found this very amusing in their not so sober state, and so Monica repeated, this time for longer. This was still, apparently, hilarious so Monica went for a third time, but did not pull away. The giggling subsided as it turned from fun to more serious and passionate, and Monica started undoing the buttons on Chandler's shirt as Chandler lifted Monica's top over her head.
They were both almost fully undressed, only in underwear and socks, when Chandler pulled back. "We can't." He said, now slightly more sober.
Monica looked at him incredulous. "We can." She said, trying to kiss him again, but Chandler refused and got up off the bed.
"No." He insisted. "We'll both regret it."
This made Monica really quite mad and so she threw a pillow at him violently uttering a few choice words. Then she lay down on the bed, angrily turned away from him and climbed under the covers.
Chandler, confused, retrieved a blanket from the wardrobe, put the pillow down on the floor before lying down and connecting his head with it, pulling the blanket over him.
Due to the exhaustive affect of the alcohol both went to sleep quite quickly, but not before both thought about what they did and didn't do.
Chandler woke late that morning to find Monica already awake and pulling her clothes on which had been discarded in their passionate frenzy the night before.
He got up slowly and stood watching her finish dressing, unsure whether or not to speak.
Monica pulled her coat on and started to walk towards the door, before thinking twice and turning around. She came up close to Chandler and kissed him quickly on the lips, but with different emotion to the previous night. She did it quickly again. "Thanks." She said finally. "For everything." She completed before she turned back around and left the room. Chandler sat slowly on the edge of the bed, trying to understand what had happened both then and last night.
Monica wasn't quite sure how she'd made it back to her hotel room, but somehow she had. She entered, closed the door behind her and immediately went into the bathroom and took a shower. She stood, lost almost, and hung-over even, under the persistent spray of the shower, not thinking, for thinking would mean understanding what she had tried to do the night before.
Eventually she got out of the shower, dried and dressed herself, and then in an unconscious mimicry of Chandler's earlier actions, sat down slowly on the edge of her own bed, It was here that she completely lost it and started crying uncontrollably. Why, she wasn't even sure herself, and put it down to being overly tired, and the onset of PMS. Why, why had she done it? Was she so totally lonely and missing male companionship that she had to try it on with her friends? Her ex-boyfriend even.
Embarrassed. Embarrassed was a word that came to her when she thought about it. Could she ever even face Chandler again?
It was then that she heard the knock on the door. Attempting to dry her tears she went and opened it. Chandler saw how upset she was and wordlessly put his arms around her and hugged her.
She was unreceptive at first, but didn't fight it and then relaxed in his arms and began to cry again, and after shutting the door, Chandler led her over to sit on the bed and gave her words of comfort.
The tears finally subsided, and Chandler released Monica, not questioning what brought on the onset of tears.
"What did you want then?" Monica asked laughing slightly that it had taken her so long to ask.
Chandler laughed slightly as well. "To find out if you were ready to go see Rachel. I called to see if she'd got back yet and she said I should bring you to come see her."
There was a slight moment of awkwardness.
"About last night." Chandler started uneasily.
"Don't." Monica stopped him. "I'm so, so sorry about it."
Chandler shook his head. "It's not your fault." He started again and held up his hand up as Monica tried to interject. "I did want it." He said, slightly awkward, unsure as to whether or not he was saying the right thing. "Just not like that, not as a drunken spur of the moment thing that we would just put down to a drunken mistake. We've already started like that once." He stopped and looked away, embarrassed. He said nothing more though and Monica wanted to tell him that it wouldn't have been a mistake, at least not in her opinion.
"I agree." She said.
Chandler looked at her, happy, but decided not to show it, or say anything more as she was probably saying it to make him feel better.
"So…" He began awkwardly. "We'd better set off for Ross and Rachel's."
Monica nodded and went over to the mirror to check her appearance, fixed her makeup then grabbed her coat and purse.
"Let's go then." She said as she opened the door.
They arrived at Ross and Rachel's house shortly after 1pm, just in time to sit down and eat with the rest of the family.
As it was a Sunday, no one had to be or go anywhere and so they ate at a leisurely pace, their conversation only interrupted occasionally by the baby and it's demands for food, drink or changing, and even he went to sleep after a while, leaving the adults in peace.
After dinner Jessica went and watched the television along with Ross and Chandler, although they weren't all that interested in the latest Sesame Street movie, and Monica helped Rachel take the plates into the kitchen and clean up.
Monica washed the plates and silverware despite Rachel's initial protests, and contemplated telling Rachel what had, or almost had, transpired the night before. She decided against it until on finishing the washing up she walked over and slumped into a chair.
"Oh God." She said, Rachel looking at her questioningly. "I did something really stupid last night." She started, before telling Rachel select parts of her evening.
Rachel, ever the supportive friend, laughed.
Monica raised her eyebrows, slightly annoyed at Rachel's lack of sympathy.
"Sorry, sweetie." Rachel eventually said, walking over to Monica and giving her a quick hug. "It's just that I've been expecting something like this for ages. It's obvious that you and Chandler don't exactly hate each other."
Monica just looked up at her wearily, still not fully appreciating Rachel's words of comfort. She gave a quick sarcastic grin. "Thanks, hon, I love you too."
Rachel gave her a similar smile before turning serious. "Monica, do you still love Chandler?" Monica looked at her in surprise. She contemplated the question before answering.
"Did you love Ross even after you'd split up?" She asked finally.
"Sometimes." Rachel replied. Monica looked at her as if her answer wasn't satisfactory.
"Yes." Rachel amended. "Always." She looked at Monica. "That was the strange thing. No matter how much I hated him for that break thing, I still loved him."
"I still love Chandler." Monica admitted after a while. "Whether we can be more than friends, I don't know. I'm not sure if I even want to know."
"Yes you do." Rachel told her. "You know exactly what you want."
"What if it's not what he wants?" Monica asked.
"It is." Rachel said confidently. "It is." She echoed.
Chandler had yet to seek the courage to tell Ross what had happened. The current discussion on the state of children's TV these days was much more satisfactory and less threatening.
Finally he blurted it out. "I almost slept with Monica last night." Fortunately by this time Jessica had gone upstairs to play.
Chandler took one look at Ross' expression before wondering what the hell he'd been thinking.
"Ignore that. I never said it. It's a lie, I tell you."
Chandler tried to take back what he'd said, but to no avail.
"What's going on with you two?" Ross asked when he'd finally got over the shock.
"Nothing. Nothing at all." Chandler said quickly, but Ross' reproving look forced him to reconsider. "I don't know. Honest to God, I don't know." He said truthfully.
"Cos if you get together and break up again I'm not sure either of you could cope." Ross told him.
"I don't want to go through that again." Chandler said. "Listen, I'm sorry I told you. I should sort it out with Monica."
"You should." Ross said. "But tell her the truth. She deserves at least that much."
And that was it on the subject.
That evening Chandler and Monica walked back to the hotel in silence.
Chandler walked Monica to her room, gave her a quick smile before wishing her goodnight, completely wimping out on having any sort of discussion with her at all.
Monica woke up the next morning knowing full well that her time off should be up now and that she ought make a return home.
So nothing happened between her and Chandler. So what?
Actually, she cared more than that, so it was a big deal.
She contemplated not telling him she was going back, but realized that it would be cruel and unnecessary. He was a friend; at least give him that much recognition.
She phoned his room, but only after calling her parents, Ross and Rachel and any other friends, including Phoebe and Joey.
"Hello?" He answered.
"Hey, it's me."
"Me?" He questioned.
"Me, Monica." She replied.
"I knew that. Really."
"Yeah, right. Sure you did."
"Hmm. So, why'd you call? Want me right here, right now?" He asked, laughing suggestively.
"Actually, no. I called to tell you I'm leaving this afternoon. Well in a minute actually."
"Oh."
"Yeah, thought I should tell you."
"Oh…so, this afternoon, eh?"
"Yeah, this afternoon."
"Don't go."
"Huh? What?"
"Stay. Here. With me."
"I can't. I've got to get back to work."
"You can work here."
"My life's in Seattle now. I'm sorry."
"Don't go. Please."
"My cab will be here in a minute. I've got to go."
"Now?"
"Yeah. Listen I'll call you when I get back. See you soon."
"But I love you." The phone went dead. The receiver put down. Had she heard what he'd said?
Monica got on the plane later with some, well actually a lot of, reluctance.
He wanted her to stay.
She wanted to stay.
So why wasn't she? Why? Why? Why?
She knew the answer.
Scared. She was scared.
She walked slowly on to the plane half-hoping he might turn up.
He didn't.
She collapsed in her chair and began to cry.
To be continued…hopefully within the next century or so…