Title: Better to have Loved
Author: Rachel Wong
Email: cali_girl_916@hotmail.com
Summary: Lana gets into a serious fight with Nell and her past. Along the
way Clark and her manage to come together. Clark/Lana
Disclaimers: I don't own anything that is related to Smallville, but I did
however write this story so it belongs to me.
Rating: PG-13
Better to have Loved
************************************************************************
Chapter 1, Lessons to be Learned
Lana was sitting in her bed with a book in hand as the sun was hidden behind the horizon. It was now nightfall on a brisk Saturday night. Lana had now been a junior for almost a whole year, but she still felt like a freshman. Lana was intently reading her book as it captivated her and transferred her into a new world where she could escape. She was peaceful until she heard a tapping on the window by her bed with the curtains half open. She looked up not sure if she even heard a noise at all. Once it didn't return she tried to get back to her chapter. Then again another tap came ever so lightly. She finally got out of her bed slowly and walked to the window not expecting to see anyone. With one of her hands she reached for the curtains to remove them from her view. She slowly and causally leaned her head towards the window looking down at the ground. With much to her surprise she saw Clark Kent holding little pebbles. When Clark realized she had noticed him, he gave out the most incredible smile that made Lana melt. She smiled back to him to her delight. She was incredibly shocked to see him out on her lawn at ten at night, but was so thrilled as well. Lana opened her window as quietly as she could without Nell noticing. She bobbed her head out of the window.
"Clark, what are you doing here?" Lana asked.
Before Lana could get a response Nell opened the door to Lana's room about to place some of Lana's schoolbooks; she left in the kitchen, on her dresser. Nell soon saw Lana and met her gaze.
She always seems to come at the most inopportune moments. Lana thought to herself.
"Lana honey, what are you doing?" Nell asked suspiciously.
Lana had to think of something quickly.
"Um. I just needed some fresh air."
Nell stared at her for a moment and shrugged it off until Clark started to yell to Lana not knowing Nell was in her room.
"Lana? Lana.!" Clark began.
Lana gave an innocent grin and tried to signal to Clark to be quiet. Clark not knowing what she was doing kept talking.
"Lana I just had." Clark started to say but got cut off when Nell's head appeared from the window next to Lana.
Clark gasped and smiled a cheesy grin.
"Clark, hello." Nell said.
"Hello Ms. Lang," he said trying to save himself and Lana.
"Can I ask you what you're doing at my nesses window?" Nell asked.
"I. I. just wanted to see her." Clark stated truthfully.
"Yes, well, most people do." Nell said harshly.
"Nell!" Lana began.
Nell looked at Lana with a straight gaze of punishment.
"Clark good night," Nell said while shutting the window.
Clark left in shock and felt sorry for what he had done. "Maybe it was a stupid thing to do. After all we do see each other almost every day. I just. wanted to see her." Clark thought.
Mean while, Lana was upset at her aunt. "What was that for?" A long pause with no answer. "He just wanted to see me!" Lana groaned. "There was no use for that."
"Lana, I just don't like teenage boys coming in the middle of the night up to your window." Nell said while walking away.
"It's ten at night on a Saturday! It's just Clark!" Lana yelled.
"I don't like him and wish you would stop seeing him like you are." Nell stated.
"What do you mean? You don't even know him. He is so wonderful, kind and sweet. He would do anything for me. And as for stop seeing him, we're just friends. When has it become such an issue who I like to hang out with?" Lana asked.
"It has become an issue when it involves the Kent family." Nell said almost regretting her words once they were unlatched.
Lana looked at her shocked at her indiscretion. "This doesn't have to do anything with Clark. You.You're just bitter about the fact that Mr. Kent married some one else!" Lana noted.
Nell started walking down the stairs. "I don't want to hear this."
"You and Mr. Kent had a thing back in high school and your just mad about the fact that some one else got him!" Lana said again. "You're just mad, because I'm falling for Clark." Lana looked at what she just said without any regrets and continued. "It reminds you too much of what you had with Mr. Kent! Who knew you could be so bitter?"
Now by this time Nell was infuriated with Lana she turned around and slapped her across the face to the surprise of Lana. Lana turned her head slowly towards Nell in shock as her eyes started to fell up with tears.
"Lana! I'm so sorry!" Nell begged. "I didn't mean it." Nell grabbed Lana by her head gently trying to apologize. Lana pulled away as tears cascaded down her check. Without a word she ran to her room closing the door behind her as she slide down to the floor still crying. Nell walked to her room but saw the shadow of Lana on the floor through the crack on the bottom of the door, and heard her sobs. Nell touched the door trying to maintain her self.
"Lana I'm so sorry," Nell pleaded.
Without a word from Lana, that she could understand, she went into her bedroom. Nell grabbed an old shoebox full of pictures and notes. She looked at all the pictures one by one. Mr. Kent and Nell where in most of the pictures much younger in high school. They were on swings together, showed riding on skates and going to the movies with old friends. Groups of people Nell once knew and loved. Old memorizes coming back to her in a flood of emotions. Nell started to cry at the sight of her past. For years not letting herself come to the realization of how long it has been and all the things she use to do and treasure. Thinking Lana should see some of these pictures it would better show her pain; Nell walked to Lana's room and placed the box by Lana's door. "Forgive me." Nell said last. Once Nell was out of the hallway, Lana opened the door and looked down. She picked up the box and took it to her room not knowing what it was. Scanning everything and reading all of the letters she started to see why what she had said hurt Nell so badly. Coming to a reconciliation Lana walked out of her room and into Nell's.
"Nell I didn't know," Lana said while still in the doorway. Nell opened her arms and Lana ran to her for a hug. "I am so sorry Lana," Nell confessed. "I shouldn't do such things to Clark and you. I'm sorry."
"It was mean of me to say what I did," Lana told.
"No Lana, it only hurt so much because it's true," Nell said. "I'm just trying to protect you from hurt," Nell said as she kissed Lana on the head.
"Isn't it better of have loved and lost then to have never loved at all?" Lana asked.
Nell smiled at her. "Yes it is Lana."
"I mean, If you could, would you just take all the pain and memorize away?" Lana asked another question.
Nell looked at her seriously. "I wouldn't take any memorize away for the world. Imagine, I'm getting taught a lesson from my nesses." Lana began to laugh as her tears dried up.
Nell looked at Lana with longing gaze. Nell started to see herself and Lana's mother in her eyes.
"Go see Clark," Nell said. Lana looked at her.
"But why?" Lana asked.
"Because I know you want to." Nell stated.
Lana looked down still in Nell's embrace.
"You heard what you said about falling for Clark. Go with your emotions." Nell said sympathizing.
"I am falling for Clark, but, what happens if it doesn't work out. We're such good friends I don't know if I want to ruin it." Lana confessed.
Nell gazed at Lana with some shared wisdom. "A very smart girl said to me once, it's better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all."
Lana smiled at her trying to take her own advice.
"I believe that was more of a question when I asked it." Lana smiled.
"Who said it was you? I just said a very smart girl," They both smiled at each other.
"I don't know." Lana began.
"Look Lana, I'm just starting to feel like a mother figure, so would you please not ruin it for me!" Nell said with a smile.
Lana laughed. "Ok."
Chapter 2, What it is to be Young **************************************
Lana was on her way out the door not before giving Nell a kiss on the cheek. "Thanks." Lana said as she ran down the stairs. Nell watched Lana leave and felt her youth coming to a peaceful unity. "Oh what it is to be young." Nell said aloud to herself. Lana ran to Clark's home and saw a light on in his loft. She quickly changed directions and ran up to the loft door; opening it slowly as her heart raced in her chest. She couldn't wait to see Clark. She stepped in his loft slowly as he sat on a wood stool leaning his head between his knees obviously feeling sad.
"Clark!" Lana said louder then she expected, so happy that she was in Clark's presence.
Clark stood up almost tripping over the stool as he saw Lana. His heart was equally racing in his chest when he saw her. Lana started to walk up to Clark slowly already knowing what she wanted to do. She walked up the stairs and their gaze never left each other eyes. As they got closer neither of them said a word. Now their bodies' four inches apart standing, looking, wondering. Lana started to open her mouth and breathing heavily. Clark couldn't stop his raging emotions as he tried to control himself. Both of them not sure what to do. But both of them knowing what they wanted to do. Lana looking down at the ground but quickly lifted her head up to see Clark still standing there. Clark's lips spread apart slowly, wanting hers. Lana took a step closer to his warm body. She could feel the heat coming from him. She could almost hear his heart pounding in his chest. Lana lifted her hand and placed it on his beating heart. She smiled happily. Standing on her tiptoes she leaned in hard quickly kissing Clark on his mouth as he met her enthusiasm with his beating warm lips. She placed her arms around Clark's broad shoulders as he lifted her up and embracing her warm body so close to his. Lana slipping her hand under his shirt feeling around his muscles and beating heart. They wanted each other so badly it hurt just to be this close. Clark started to kiss Lana's neck. Lana just wanting to feel him, moves her head in the direction of his lips for more passionate kissing. Blood rushing, harmonies raging, emotions crashing and love connecting. They finally realized how much they truly loved one another and wondered how they could have resisted each other's touch for so long. Their love overflowed each other and they now both felt wonderfully complete.
The End
Better to have Loved
************************************************************************
Chapter 1, Lessons to be Learned
Lana was sitting in her bed with a book in hand as the sun was hidden behind the horizon. It was now nightfall on a brisk Saturday night. Lana had now been a junior for almost a whole year, but she still felt like a freshman. Lana was intently reading her book as it captivated her and transferred her into a new world where she could escape. She was peaceful until she heard a tapping on the window by her bed with the curtains half open. She looked up not sure if she even heard a noise at all. Once it didn't return she tried to get back to her chapter. Then again another tap came ever so lightly. She finally got out of her bed slowly and walked to the window not expecting to see anyone. With one of her hands she reached for the curtains to remove them from her view. She slowly and causally leaned her head towards the window looking down at the ground. With much to her surprise she saw Clark Kent holding little pebbles. When Clark realized she had noticed him, he gave out the most incredible smile that made Lana melt. She smiled back to him to her delight. She was incredibly shocked to see him out on her lawn at ten at night, but was so thrilled as well. Lana opened her window as quietly as she could without Nell noticing. She bobbed her head out of the window.
"Clark, what are you doing here?" Lana asked.
Before Lana could get a response Nell opened the door to Lana's room about to place some of Lana's schoolbooks; she left in the kitchen, on her dresser. Nell soon saw Lana and met her gaze.
She always seems to come at the most inopportune moments. Lana thought to herself.
"Lana honey, what are you doing?" Nell asked suspiciously.
Lana had to think of something quickly.
"Um. I just needed some fresh air."
Nell stared at her for a moment and shrugged it off until Clark started to yell to Lana not knowing Nell was in her room.
"Lana? Lana.!" Clark began.
Lana gave an innocent grin and tried to signal to Clark to be quiet. Clark not knowing what she was doing kept talking.
"Lana I just had." Clark started to say but got cut off when Nell's head appeared from the window next to Lana.
Clark gasped and smiled a cheesy grin.
"Clark, hello." Nell said.
"Hello Ms. Lang," he said trying to save himself and Lana.
"Can I ask you what you're doing at my nesses window?" Nell asked.
"I. I. just wanted to see her." Clark stated truthfully.
"Yes, well, most people do." Nell said harshly.
"Nell!" Lana began.
Nell looked at Lana with a straight gaze of punishment.
"Clark good night," Nell said while shutting the window.
Clark left in shock and felt sorry for what he had done. "Maybe it was a stupid thing to do. After all we do see each other almost every day. I just. wanted to see her." Clark thought.
Mean while, Lana was upset at her aunt. "What was that for?" A long pause with no answer. "He just wanted to see me!" Lana groaned. "There was no use for that."
"Lana, I just don't like teenage boys coming in the middle of the night up to your window." Nell said while walking away.
"It's ten at night on a Saturday! It's just Clark!" Lana yelled.
"I don't like him and wish you would stop seeing him like you are." Nell stated.
"What do you mean? You don't even know him. He is so wonderful, kind and sweet. He would do anything for me. And as for stop seeing him, we're just friends. When has it become such an issue who I like to hang out with?" Lana asked.
"It has become an issue when it involves the Kent family." Nell said almost regretting her words once they were unlatched.
Lana looked at her shocked at her indiscretion. "This doesn't have to do anything with Clark. You.You're just bitter about the fact that Mr. Kent married some one else!" Lana noted.
Nell started walking down the stairs. "I don't want to hear this."
"You and Mr. Kent had a thing back in high school and your just mad about the fact that some one else got him!" Lana said again. "You're just mad, because I'm falling for Clark." Lana looked at what she just said without any regrets and continued. "It reminds you too much of what you had with Mr. Kent! Who knew you could be so bitter?"
Now by this time Nell was infuriated with Lana she turned around and slapped her across the face to the surprise of Lana. Lana turned her head slowly towards Nell in shock as her eyes started to fell up with tears.
"Lana! I'm so sorry!" Nell begged. "I didn't mean it." Nell grabbed Lana by her head gently trying to apologize. Lana pulled away as tears cascaded down her check. Without a word she ran to her room closing the door behind her as she slide down to the floor still crying. Nell walked to her room but saw the shadow of Lana on the floor through the crack on the bottom of the door, and heard her sobs. Nell touched the door trying to maintain her self.
"Lana I'm so sorry," Nell pleaded.
Without a word from Lana, that she could understand, she went into her bedroom. Nell grabbed an old shoebox full of pictures and notes. She looked at all the pictures one by one. Mr. Kent and Nell where in most of the pictures much younger in high school. They were on swings together, showed riding on skates and going to the movies with old friends. Groups of people Nell once knew and loved. Old memorizes coming back to her in a flood of emotions. Nell started to cry at the sight of her past. For years not letting herself come to the realization of how long it has been and all the things she use to do and treasure. Thinking Lana should see some of these pictures it would better show her pain; Nell walked to Lana's room and placed the box by Lana's door. "Forgive me." Nell said last. Once Nell was out of the hallway, Lana opened the door and looked down. She picked up the box and took it to her room not knowing what it was. Scanning everything and reading all of the letters she started to see why what she had said hurt Nell so badly. Coming to a reconciliation Lana walked out of her room and into Nell's.
"Nell I didn't know," Lana said while still in the doorway. Nell opened her arms and Lana ran to her for a hug. "I am so sorry Lana," Nell confessed. "I shouldn't do such things to Clark and you. I'm sorry."
"It was mean of me to say what I did," Lana told.
"No Lana, it only hurt so much because it's true," Nell said. "I'm just trying to protect you from hurt," Nell said as she kissed Lana on the head.
"Isn't it better of have loved and lost then to have never loved at all?" Lana asked.
Nell smiled at her. "Yes it is Lana."
"I mean, If you could, would you just take all the pain and memorize away?" Lana asked another question.
Nell looked at her seriously. "I wouldn't take any memorize away for the world. Imagine, I'm getting taught a lesson from my nesses." Lana began to laugh as her tears dried up.
Nell looked at Lana with longing gaze. Nell started to see herself and Lana's mother in her eyes.
"Go see Clark," Nell said. Lana looked at her.
"But why?" Lana asked.
"Because I know you want to." Nell stated.
Lana looked down still in Nell's embrace.
"You heard what you said about falling for Clark. Go with your emotions." Nell said sympathizing.
"I am falling for Clark, but, what happens if it doesn't work out. We're such good friends I don't know if I want to ruin it." Lana confessed.
Nell gazed at Lana with some shared wisdom. "A very smart girl said to me once, it's better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all."
Lana smiled at her trying to take her own advice.
"I believe that was more of a question when I asked it." Lana smiled.
"Who said it was you? I just said a very smart girl," They both smiled at each other.
"I don't know." Lana began.
"Look Lana, I'm just starting to feel like a mother figure, so would you please not ruin it for me!" Nell said with a smile.
Lana laughed. "Ok."
Chapter 2, What it is to be Young **************************************
Lana was on her way out the door not before giving Nell a kiss on the cheek. "Thanks." Lana said as she ran down the stairs. Nell watched Lana leave and felt her youth coming to a peaceful unity. "Oh what it is to be young." Nell said aloud to herself. Lana ran to Clark's home and saw a light on in his loft. She quickly changed directions and ran up to the loft door; opening it slowly as her heart raced in her chest. She couldn't wait to see Clark. She stepped in his loft slowly as he sat on a wood stool leaning his head between his knees obviously feeling sad.
"Clark!" Lana said louder then she expected, so happy that she was in Clark's presence.
Clark stood up almost tripping over the stool as he saw Lana. His heart was equally racing in his chest when he saw her. Lana started to walk up to Clark slowly already knowing what she wanted to do. She walked up the stairs and their gaze never left each other eyes. As they got closer neither of them said a word. Now their bodies' four inches apart standing, looking, wondering. Lana started to open her mouth and breathing heavily. Clark couldn't stop his raging emotions as he tried to control himself. Both of them not sure what to do. But both of them knowing what they wanted to do. Lana looking down at the ground but quickly lifted her head up to see Clark still standing there. Clark's lips spread apart slowly, wanting hers. Lana took a step closer to his warm body. She could feel the heat coming from him. She could almost hear his heart pounding in his chest. Lana lifted her hand and placed it on his beating heart. She smiled happily. Standing on her tiptoes she leaned in hard quickly kissing Clark on his mouth as he met her enthusiasm with his beating warm lips. She placed her arms around Clark's broad shoulders as he lifted her up and embracing her warm body so close to his. Lana slipping her hand under his shirt feeling around his muscles and beating heart. They wanted each other so badly it hurt just to be this close. Clark started to kiss Lana's neck. Lana just wanting to feel him, moves her head in the direction of his lips for more passionate kissing. Blood rushing, harmonies raging, emotions crashing and love connecting. They finally realized how much they truly loved one another and wondered how they could have resisted each other's touch for so long. Their love overflowed each other and they now both felt wonderfully complete.
The End