A/N: Written for the Phoenix Wright kink meme.
Trucy frowned. "I don't understand, Uncle Larry."
She left the half clean dishes, and moved to sit down across from Larry at the kitchen table.
"Well, I just don't have a girlfriend. That's all."
Trucy thought about it for a minute. "Oh, I see. You have a boyfriend like Daddy, right?"
Larry looked thoughtful. "So that's why Nick and Edgy asked me to babysit you while they went off together for a week. I'd always wondered..." Trucy was still looking at him inquiringly, and Larry realised she was still waiting for him to answer her question. "No, I'm straight, Truce. I'm just single."
"But..." Trucy looked confused. "Then, who does your cooking?"
Larry was shocked at that. "Has your Daddy been telling you that men can't do the cooking in a relationship, because that's not true. You need to learn to stand up for yourself and tell—"
"No, no, not that." Trucy smiled. "It's just that, Mr Edgeworth always says that the only person he knows that cooks worse than Daddy is you, and it's a wonder that we don't starve."
"He said that, did he?" Larry frowned. "I've had girlfriends. They seem to dump me a lot, though, so I eat a fair bit of takeout."
Larry watched Trucy's face. She had an odd expression on it as she looked from their half-finished game of attack-of-the-dinos (where plastic velociraptors attacked the barbies, and the barbies were forced to baracade their house and defend themselves) to the not-quite-packed-away Monopoly board (Trucy wanted it to still be out when Daddy got home, so she could tell him she'd won) to the Wii Larry had brought with him (they'd been playing Smash Bros and Trucy had been smashed off the level half a dozen times before Larry had started teaching her his favourite tricks).
"But... You're a nice guy, Uncle Larry. I don't understand."
Larry smiled ruefully. "Yeah, neither do I. But, I figure, eventually I'll meet the right girl, right? Just gotta keep trying, treat every one like she'll be the future Mrs Butz. And eventually I'll get lucky." Then he quickly added "But not in that way," in case Trucy was getting wrong thoughts.
Trucy stopped for a long moment to consider this. Then she looked up at Larry and grinned. "I know exactly what to do!"
Larry frowned. "Thanks, but I've already had my conciliatory chocolate sundae with extra sprinkles."
"No, no! We need to get you a girlfriend!"
Larry smiled. "You know, I don't need matchmaking help from a ten-year-old."
"Don't be silly," said Trucy, and for a moment, Larry felt relieved. "I'll be your girlfriend."
Larry looked at her, and said gently, "Your Daddy would kill me, Truce."
"Why?" she asked defiantly. "You're nice, and funny, and you play with me heaps, with really cool toys, too. And you have good taste in food, and have pros—pros—"
"Prospects?" suggested Larry.
"Yeah, that's it. What with the painting. And Daddy says all guys are jerks, and I should stay away from them until I'm at least thirty, but I know you're not a jerk, because you're friends with Daddy, and he can't mean me to stay away from you, because he asked you to babysit. And I can cook for you, and do the washing – I know from how your clothes smell funny that you don't know how, not properly, anyway – and I even know how to clean the toilet, because Daddy taught me."
Larry said, "You're ten, Trucy."
"Why does it matter?" She crossed her arms, and looked at him with wide puppy-eyes.
"Well, I'm pretty sure there are laws against me dating someone your age."
"Yes, but my Daddy used to be a defence attorney, remember? I bet he still knows enough to get you off. And Uncle Edgeworth's a lawyer, too, so everything will be fine."
Larry sighed. "Look, Trucy, your offer's sweet, but... You're my best friend's daughter. I couldn't do that to your Daddy. And you're ten, and I could never touch a kid. I know I've had lots of girlfriends, but... No. Just no."
Trucy looked at him dejected, before abruptly getting up and going back to the dishes. Larry watched her for a long moment, before sighing and getting up too. He walked over to stand next to her, and put his arm around her shoulder.
"I don't need a girlfriend, anyway," said Larry. "I like take-out, you know? I'm happy, single. But, there is something I do need."
Trucy looked up at him. "What?" she asked.
"Well, I could use a friend. Especially if Nick and Edgy are doing that love-dovey thing – it'll be a while before they remember that I exist, at least if past experience is anything to go by. So, this is a very, very important question. Will you be my friend?"
Trucy grinned. "I'd love to."
"Good. Then, as my friend, you have to go play Wii with me. I haven't shown you Mario Kart yet."
Trucy saluted. "Sure thing, Uncle Larry."
Then she made him lean over, so she could whisper something in his ear. "This doesn't mean you're off the hook, you know. I'm still going to find you a girlfriend. It just means I'll need to make sure she's more age-appro— age-apope—"
"Age-appropriate?" offered Larry.
"Yeah, that's it," said Trucy.
