Author's Note: Really, Jason? You just slipped into life in Atlantis, just like that? I wrote this little snippet spontaneously in a PM message to StoneWingedAngel and had to share it. I wish I was sorry for this, but I'm really not. Title is a quote from Harry Hill.
Bush Push
Jason started to dance on the spot, twigs snapping under his sandals.
"What are you doing?" asked Hercules, frowning at his new friend, wondering if this was some sort of ritual that he was unaware of.
"I need – need to – to go," Jason stammered, looking a little frightened.
"Go? Where are you going?" Pythagoras scanned the forest around them, searching for signs of danger.
"You know... go," Jason insisted. "Do a – a number two."
"Eh?" Hercules scrunched his face up in confusion at the same time as Pythagoras started one of his lectures.
"The number two is a fascinating number indeed, Jason—"
"I need to poo and I need to poo now!" Jason suddenly erupted.
"Oh. Well, on you go then. We won't watch if you don't want us to," assured Hercules.
Jason gulped. "Erm... how exactly do I go about - er, this?" He waved a hand around vaguely, before continuing his little dance.
Pythagoras and Hercules exchanged A Look. Clearly, their new friend was a few apples short of a barrel. Hercules stepped forward and gave Jason a gentle shove into a nearby bush. "Have fun," he said cheerfully. "Yell if you need anything."
The bush whimpered pitifully.
The End