SONG OF THE SPIKE LOVERS
Mercy! There is nothing like
The wondrous goodness that is Spike.
Silver hair shot through with lightning,
He's so ravishing, it's frightening.
Lips like his are made for sin;
Eyes like rain, lit from within;
High cheekbones, sharp as his wit -
Who needs Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt? -
There's no sexier vampire...
Loads of lust does he inspire!
Even that white eyebrow scar
Can't his vivid beauty mar.
Hot or cold, in any weather,
In that black duster of leather,
He's delicious, dark and sleek...
Only one girl makes him weak.
How can stubborn, silly Buffy
Be so senseless, blind, and stuffy?
While she's running after Riley,
There's our Spike, so quick and wily.
She's the lucky one he chose...
What's he get? Punched in the nose!
Frequently slammed into walls,
Often kick-boxed in the ---s!
How can Buffy try to hurt
Spike when he's without a shirt??
So he's got those pointy teeth, her
Telling Spike that he's beneath her
Broke our hearts along with his.
Who does Buffy think she is?
Poor, sweet Spike, she made him cry,
Just 'cause he's made thousands die?
So he's evil...so he's bad,
Who could hate so cute a lad?
So he'd bite you till you're dead
If that chip weren't in his head.
He's not boring, dim, or shallow,
He loves cocoa with marshmallow!
He is anything but bland...
He's romantic, clever, AND
Here's a guy so loyal that he
Loved a girl completely batty!
So he isn't big and burly,
So his scream's a *wee bit* girly...
Look how he can throw a knife!
Though he's dead, he's full of life!
Slayer, if you turn him down,
You're the dumbest girl in town.
You don't want a vamp that fine? -
There's a few million in line!
So before you try to stake him,
Off your hands we'll gladly take him.
Keep your Rileys and the like,
We'll take naughty, wicked Spike!
Mercy! There is nothing like
The wondrous goodness that is Spike.
Silver hair shot through with lightning,
He's so ravishing, it's frightening.
Lips like his are made for sin;
Eyes like rain, lit from within;
High cheekbones, sharp as his wit -
Who needs Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt? -
There's no sexier vampire...
Loads of lust does he inspire!
Even that white eyebrow scar
Can't his vivid beauty mar.
Hot or cold, in any weather,
In that black duster of leather,
He's delicious, dark and sleek...
Only one girl makes him weak.
How can stubborn, silly Buffy
Be so senseless, blind, and stuffy?
While she's running after Riley,
There's our Spike, so quick and wily.
She's the lucky one he chose...
What's he get? Punched in the nose!
Frequently slammed into walls,
Often kick-boxed in the ---s!
How can Buffy try to hurt
Spike when he's without a shirt??
So he's got those pointy teeth, her
Telling Spike that he's beneath her
Broke our hearts along with his.
Who does Buffy think she is?
Poor, sweet Spike, she made him cry,
Just 'cause he's made thousands die?
So he's evil...so he's bad,
Who could hate so cute a lad?
So he'd bite you till you're dead
If that chip weren't in his head.
He's not boring, dim, or shallow,
He loves cocoa with marshmallow!
He is anything but bland...
He's romantic, clever, AND
Here's a guy so loyal that he
Loved a girl completely batty!
So he isn't big and burly,
So his scream's a *wee bit* girly...
Look how he can throw a knife!
Though he's dead, he's full of life!
Slayer, if you turn him down,
You're the dumbest girl in town.
You don't want a vamp that fine? -
There's a few million in line!
So before you try to stake him,
Off your hands we'll gladly take him.
Keep your Rileys and the like,
We'll take naughty, wicked Spike!