Okay, I'm taking driving school now, and I thought, "who the hell would
give Kitty her learner's permit?" Especially after mutants were exposed.
The answer, my oddball teacher, Khash. The first chapter is a
bit...well...unhumorfull, but it will get funnier. I mean, the only stories
that are funnier than Kitty's cooking is her driving. So, read and review!
Kitty Pryde got out of Scott's car and looked at the building ahead of her. The "Teen Driving and Traffic School." She couldn't believe it- she was going to learn how to drive. She already knew she was going to be great- Kurt had gotten her to play all those stupid video games with race cars, and she actually won. Okay, so she only won once, but she figured Kurt was really good, and so, if she won once, that made her good to.
Scott Summers was having similar thoughts. After all, she couldn't sew, she couldn't do laundry, and she really couldn't cook, there had to be something she was good at, why not driving. 'And besides,' he thought to himself, 'she's been watching me drive for a while now; she's got to have picked up some good driving skills.' As he said good-bye and drove off, he vaguely wondered if she had picked up Logan's driving style, but brushed off the thought, thinking that Kitty was smart enough to know who the better driver was. If only he knew how wrong he was.
Kitty mentally made a check of all her things. 'Okay, highlighter, check. Pencil and pen, double check. Number...number? What's my ID number?' she panicked a minute, before she remembered Rogue telling her to write it on her hand, saying something about how blondes weren't the only stupid ones, but Kitty brushed it off. 'Alrighty, my number is....' a quick check to the hand.... 2639, cool. I am so ready for this.'
She opened the door and walked into her classroom for the next few days. It looked like an ordinary classroom, but it had some traffic signs hanging on the wall, and TV's in two of the corners. She looked around brightly, looking for a face she knew, when she saw Lance. Her first reaction was to jump up and give him a kiss, but then she remembered that they were currently broken up, so she took the seat furthest away from him, but he noticed her and got walked toward her.
"Hey Kitty," he said, sliding into the seat in front of her, sitting backward so he could see her.
"Hi, Lance," she said stiffly, trying not to look at him. "What are you doing here anyways? You already have your license."
"Well, I also have a few tickets, and the judge is making me take this class, mostly because I never really took it before," Lance said.
Kitty was about to ask how he got a license without taking driver's ed, but decided not to. This was the boy who had knocked down two schools, tried to make her steal test answers, and was a high school drop out. Faking a license didn't really seem that big compared to everything else.
Instead she said, "I don't want to know how you got away with that, and I have nothing to say to you, so, if you will go away that'd be great."
Lance looked hurt for a second, and then replied, "You'll think differently once the class finds out that you're a mutant, and I'm the only one that talks to you." With that, he sauntered back to his seat, confident that he had gotten his point across.
"GOOD MORNING CLASS!" a loud voice boomed. Kitty slightly jumped in her seat, looking at the man who she supposed was her new teacher. He was short, and slightly overweight, but looked nice enough. "My name is Khash, not Mr. Khash, but Khash, okay? Now, you're all here because you want to drive, and you're in luck, because I'm the best instructor in Bayville. Now, you see that blank space on the wall there?" he asked, pointing to a space between some of the signs. "That is for the day when someone fails the written part of their test. No one has ever failed that part twice. I know sometimes people get overconfident, and don't study, but no one fails twice. If you do, I will blow up your picture, and put, 'this person is a dumb ass' underneath."
The class looked around, obviously shocked. All of them had heard adults cussing, but their teachers? This was just too weird, teachers gave out detentions for cussing, and they weren't supposed to do it. Kitty decided right then that this was going to be a weird class.
"Now class, I'd like you to meet my best friend, Mr. Stick," Khash said, showing them a thin, long stick. "Now, Mr. Stick is a big help in this class," he slammed the stick down on the table, making everyone jump. "You see, if you fall asleep, my good friend here can wake you up. Now, let's get to know each other a little better. Who here goes to El Dorado?" Two of the students raised their hands. "Okay, and Valencia?" Three more students raised their hands. This continued with a few more schools that Kitty recognized from around the district, until, finally, "and Bayville?" Kitty and Lance both raised their hands, even though Lance technically didn't go there anymore.
"Ew, Bayville? That's where all those...those freaks are," one of the girl's said, staring at Lance and Kitty, frightened that they were two of the mutants she had seen on the news.
"Like, mutants are everywhere, Bayville is just the only place they no about," Kitty snapped, glaring at the girl.
"Hey, I know you, you're one of the mutants on the news," one of the boys said, and the whole class either inched away from Kitty, or gave her dirty glares.
"Yeah, what about it?" Lance said, starting to stand, when the teacher stopped him.
"That will be enough, I think. Now listen up you two," he said to Lance and Kitty, "I don't give a shit of who or what you are, that means nothing in my class." He addressed the other students, "and I don't want any fighting coming from anybody in this class, we're here to drive, not talk about all this mutant crap." He smiled and rubbed his hands together. "Now, since we have that out of the way, let's get to the fun stuff."
Some of the students glanced around uneasily, were they going to be driving on their first day? Most of them had never been in the drivers seat of a car, and weren't anxious to take their first ride in front of strangers. But Khash took a dry-erase marker, and started talking about some of the rules of the road. Kitty sank down in her seat. This was ridiculous, everyone knows that green light means go, red light means stop, and don't drink and drive, let's get to the fun stuff! Kitty was not at all worried about taking her first car ride in a place full of strangers, most of which hated her, she wanted to drive.
After about two hours, Khash handed out a test.
"Okay people; let's see how many of you actually pay attention to my lectures?"
Kitty looked at her test eagerly. "The colors of the arrows controlling turns are: Green, yellow, and red. Green and red Green, yellow, red, and blue. Blue? What is this, Kmart?" Kitty asked herself, before marking a. Most of the questions were ridiculously easy, like, "What do you do at a Stop Sign?" But Kitty got a few tough one's that made her think. And of course, when she thought, Kitty had a tendency to doodle. She was halfway through writing, "Lance," "Kitty Alvers" and, "Lance Alvers in swirly letters before she realized what she was doing, and erased all of it. "Stupid Lance," she muttered under her breath, making the girl sitting next to her give her a funny look.
"Alright then class, let's see how you did." After rattling of the right answers, and Kitty giving a slight, "yes" every time she got the right answer, Khash said, "Now, it's time for our next movie. It's just a coincidence that it happens right before lunch, but, if you need to barf, go outside." The class gave each other funny looks. What movie could be that bad? They had seen all kinds of sick movies with horrible accidents, and none of them blinked, so most of them were confident that this was just another weird perk of there teacher- over -dramatization.
"Aw, shit," the girl next to Kitty said under her breath, "Red Asphalt." Kitty looked at her questioningly. "My friend took this class before; she said this movie's really gross." Kitty was confused, what was so bad about a movie, sure, she had cried during Bambi, but, this was a movie, Bambi was a cute little deer. She was sure the girl was overreacting.
As she watched the movie, Kitty realized how wrong she was. From the first scene, which showed a freeway accident, Kitty knew that this was no ordinary movie. There were two people hosting the show, a policewoman, and a camera guy. They went through about 8 different accidents, from as minor as a slight collision, to a scene where a little girl was holding her head, screaming from the pain. Kitty was starting to get very nervous about this. The next scene showed a horrible accident, where the driver hadn't made it and his head had been cut open, and some medics were scraping his brains from the street. Kitty turned away, not being able to watch. This movie was horrible, how could they show it on their first day? The people on TV were stressing on how most people get in a car accident every 10 years, and Kitty was having second doubts on if she wanted to be in this class. She was only going into 10th grade; she could take this class next summer, when maybe she would be ready for this. But the movie ended, and the feelings and slightly passed. Khash started drawing on the board. The class drew in a breath, was he going to talk about some horrible crash he was in? He started drawing a map. Was he going to show where it happened? He started drawing X's on the board. The students had no idea where their teacher was headed.
"This," he said, pointing to one of the X's, "is Burger Bomb. This," he pointed to another X, "is Del Taco." He continued pointing out the fast food places within walking distance of the school. "It's lunch time," he said, "get out of here." So much for a stirring speech about avoiding accidents, and driving safely.
Kitty Pryde got out of Scott's car and looked at the building ahead of her. The "Teen Driving and Traffic School." She couldn't believe it- she was going to learn how to drive. She already knew she was going to be great- Kurt had gotten her to play all those stupid video games with race cars, and she actually won. Okay, so she only won once, but she figured Kurt was really good, and so, if she won once, that made her good to.
Scott Summers was having similar thoughts. After all, she couldn't sew, she couldn't do laundry, and she really couldn't cook, there had to be something she was good at, why not driving. 'And besides,' he thought to himself, 'she's been watching me drive for a while now; she's got to have picked up some good driving skills.' As he said good-bye and drove off, he vaguely wondered if she had picked up Logan's driving style, but brushed off the thought, thinking that Kitty was smart enough to know who the better driver was. If only he knew how wrong he was.
Kitty mentally made a check of all her things. 'Okay, highlighter, check. Pencil and pen, double check. Number...number? What's my ID number?' she panicked a minute, before she remembered Rogue telling her to write it on her hand, saying something about how blondes weren't the only stupid ones, but Kitty brushed it off. 'Alrighty, my number is....' a quick check to the hand.... 2639, cool. I am so ready for this.'
She opened the door and walked into her classroom for the next few days. It looked like an ordinary classroom, but it had some traffic signs hanging on the wall, and TV's in two of the corners. She looked around brightly, looking for a face she knew, when she saw Lance. Her first reaction was to jump up and give him a kiss, but then she remembered that they were currently broken up, so she took the seat furthest away from him, but he noticed her and got walked toward her.
"Hey Kitty," he said, sliding into the seat in front of her, sitting backward so he could see her.
"Hi, Lance," she said stiffly, trying not to look at him. "What are you doing here anyways? You already have your license."
"Well, I also have a few tickets, and the judge is making me take this class, mostly because I never really took it before," Lance said.
Kitty was about to ask how he got a license without taking driver's ed, but decided not to. This was the boy who had knocked down two schools, tried to make her steal test answers, and was a high school drop out. Faking a license didn't really seem that big compared to everything else.
Instead she said, "I don't want to know how you got away with that, and I have nothing to say to you, so, if you will go away that'd be great."
Lance looked hurt for a second, and then replied, "You'll think differently once the class finds out that you're a mutant, and I'm the only one that talks to you." With that, he sauntered back to his seat, confident that he had gotten his point across.
"GOOD MORNING CLASS!" a loud voice boomed. Kitty slightly jumped in her seat, looking at the man who she supposed was her new teacher. He was short, and slightly overweight, but looked nice enough. "My name is Khash, not Mr. Khash, but Khash, okay? Now, you're all here because you want to drive, and you're in luck, because I'm the best instructor in Bayville. Now, you see that blank space on the wall there?" he asked, pointing to a space between some of the signs. "That is for the day when someone fails the written part of their test. No one has ever failed that part twice. I know sometimes people get overconfident, and don't study, but no one fails twice. If you do, I will blow up your picture, and put, 'this person is a dumb ass' underneath."
The class looked around, obviously shocked. All of them had heard adults cussing, but their teachers? This was just too weird, teachers gave out detentions for cussing, and they weren't supposed to do it. Kitty decided right then that this was going to be a weird class.
"Now class, I'd like you to meet my best friend, Mr. Stick," Khash said, showing them a thin, long stick. "Now, Mr. Stick is a big help in this class," he slammed the stick down on the table, making everyone jump. "You see, if you fall asleep, my good friend here can wake you up. Now, let's get to know each other a little better. Who here goes to El Dorado?" Two of the students raised their hands. "Okay, and Valencia?" Three more students raised their hands. This continued with a few more schools that Kitty recognized from around the district, until, finally, "and Bayville?" Kitty and Lance both raised their hands, even though Lance technically didn't go there anymore.
"Ew, Bayville? That's where all those...those freaks are," one of the girl's said, staring at Lance and Kitty, frightened that they were two of the mutants she had seen on the news.
"Like, mutants are everywhere, Bayville is just the only place they no about," Kitty snapped, glaring at the girl.
"Hey, I know you, you're one of the mutants on the news," one of the boys said, and the whole class either inched away from Kitty, or gave her dirty glares.
"Yeah, what about it?" Lance said, starting to stand, when the teacher stopped him.
"That will be enough, I think. Now listen up you two," he said to Lance and Kitty, "I don't give a shit of who or what you are, that means nothing in my class." He addressed the other students, "and I don't want any fighting coming from anybody in this class, we're here to drive, not talk about all this mutant crap." He smiled and rubbed his hands together. "Now, since we have that out of the way, let's get to the fun stuff."
Some of the students glanced around uneasily, were they going to be driving on their first day? Most of them had never been in the drivers seat of a car, and weren't anxious to take their first ride in front of strangers. But Khash took a dry-erase marker, and started talking about some of the rules of the road. Kitty sank down in her seat. This was ridiculous, everyone knows that green light means go, red light means stop, and don't drink and drive, let's get to the fun stuff! Kitty was not at all worried about taking her first car ride in a place full of strangers, most of which hated her, she wanted to drive.
After about two hours, Khash handed out a test.
"Okay people; let's see how many of you actually pay attention to my lectures?"
Kitty looked at her test eagerly. "The colors of the arrows controlling turns are: Green, yellow, and red. Green and red Green, yellow, red, and blue. Blue? What is this, Kmart?" Kitty asked herself, before marking a. Most of the questions were ridiculously easy, like, "What do you do at a Stop Sign?" But Kitty got a few tough one's that made her think. And of course, when she thought, Kitty had a tendency to doodle. She was halfway through writing, "Lance," "Kitty Alvers" and, "Lance Alvers in swirly letters before she realized what she was doing, and erased all of it. "Stupid Lance," she muttered under her breath, making the girl sitting next to her give her a funny look.
"Alright then class, let's see how you did." After rattling of the right answers, and Kitty giving a slight, "yes" every time she got the right answer, Khash said, "Now, it's time for our next movie. It's just a coincidence that it happens right before lunch, but, if you need to barf, go outside." The class gave each other funny looks. What movie could be that bad? They had seen all kinds of sick movies with horrible accidents, and none of them blinked, so most of them were confident that this was just another weird perk of there teacher- over -dramatization.
"Aw, shit," the girl next to Kitty said under her breath, "Red Asphalt." Kitty looked at her questioningly. "My friend took this class before; she said this movie's really gross." Kitty was confused, what was so bad about a movie, sure, she had cried during Bambi, but, this was a movie, Bambi was a cute little deer. She was sure the girl was overreacting.
As she watched the movie, Kitty realized how wrong she was. From the first scene, which showed a freeway accident, Kitty knew that this was no ordinary movie. There were two people hosting the show, a policewoman, and a camera guy. They went through about 8 different accidents, from as minor as a slight collision, to a scene where a little girl was holding her head, screaming from the pain. Kitty was starting to get very nervous about this. The next scene showed a horrible accident, where the driver hadn't made it and his head had been cut open, and some medics were scraping his brains from the street. Kitty turned away, not being able to watch. This movie was horrible, how could they show it on their first day? The people on TV were stressing on how most people get in a car accident every 10 years, and Kitty was having second doubts on if she wanted to be in this class. She was only going into 10th grade; she could take this class next summer, when maybe she would be ready for this. But the movie ended, and the feelings and slightly passed. Khash started drawing on the board. The class drew in a breath, was he going to talk about some horrible crash he was in? He started drawing a map. Was he going to show where it happened? He started drawing X's on the board. The students had no idea where their teacher was headed.
"This," he said, pointing to one of the X's, "is Burger Bomb. This," he pointed to another X, "is Del Taco." He continued pointing out the fast food places within walking distance of the school. "It's lunch time," he said, "get out of here." So much for a stirring speech about avoiding accidents, and driving safely.