Last light.
Shining, candle-bright and heart-worn
(Like a dead-lover's photo
against a face)
Torn away
Too early.
.
Pace of life, for Jamie,
Was jumping;
Leaping, springing into happy air
Bounding, laughing,
Nostalgia for the present
(The past, done
The future made to wait)
Born of love of life
Love of family
Love of friendship
Love of the lost for whom he was a beacon
We will mourn
Jamie Bennett
.
Self-sworn child-protector
Dream-pretender
Staunch-defender always to the last
We will remember Jamie Bennett.
.
Mender of promises
Patcher of knees
Bender of the truth, occasionally,
(to make sure nobody got punished
for everybody's crime)
At last surrendered
Dawn-break
Last Tuesday night in a hospital bed
Aged 94
A wife of 60 years beside him
Snowing outside
Cold inside
Fitting for a man who died
unwavering
Tenacious in his faith
Not in the Trinity
But in his innocent beliefs.
.
He brought us up
On stories he had made
And memories he had known
In legends young and old
Myths whether good or bad
.
We learnt of
Bunnymund of Easter
Santa Claus
The Sandman
Tooth Fairy
Pitch Black
Of Mother Nature
Man in Moon
But mostly…
.
Mainly of Jack
.
Jack Frost the winter spirit
Who stayed with us in words
more than anything
Through firelight and s'mores on sticks
Through summer walks and rainy days
Through blazing red leaves on maple trees
And birds twittering and singing in them…
.
Through the winter months
In snowballs
And in sledging
And in skating
And in climbing leaf-less trees
And in piggy-back rides
And snow-days
And in skidding on ice-patches
to see who could get the furthest.
.
Jamie called us the Forgotten
Up until he died
Because, to him, we didn't see
We just forgot to see.
To him the stories
he made up
were real.
.
I wish we could have seen
Through him
Our Jamie Bennett.
.
94
Died in bed
4 children
16 grandchildren
28 great grand-children
a wife
a sister
.
He knew us all.
He told us of ourselves
He saw our hearts
He called them 'centres'
Told us to explore
Told us that we should play
That Childhood is for life…
.
He should be here.
and saying this instead of me.
I wish he was.
Our Jamie always knew what should be said
He taught me all the things a brother should.
.
Our Jamie Bennett.
Last light
Ashes lit on fire until his dying day
His dust a magic dust
His passing like a boat
suspended suddenly in ice
A jerk for us
Him, free
Jumping from the boast
Rushing across the planes
White expanses
Glowing like a baby's eyes
Shining from the sun
Or from the winter moon
Whichever one
I think he'd like a moon
And him, his ninety-year-old legs
Left on the boat
Him, eight again
Just running, dancing, whooping
Wind-caught hair
Him flying just as much as running
Laughing
Speeding into the distance
like a sledge down a hill
And the breath of Jack's old friend in his hair
His grin stretched tight in the moonlight
Legs like pinwheels
Cartwheels
Careering head over head over heels over knees over arms
And running
.
And behind him, a figure
White-haired
Blue hoodie with frost patterns
A long, crooked stick, like a shepherd's staff
Tight in palm
.
He is taking our Jamie
He is holding his hand
He is lifting him high into the air
.
Together
Skinning the silver linings of clouds
Dusting the lower ones with frost and making casual snow
.
Together
Shouting into the distance
Sunrise distance
Laughing
Forward, into the distance
Like they were skating
Just like he taught me
Just like he taught us
Just like Jack taught him
on the same lake
With the same pair of those worn and battered skates
With just the same laugh
And the same smile
Just as he loved each one of us the same
.
His own, the snow-days
His, the fun-days
His, the laughter and the memories
His, the wonder
His, the good and better dreams
His too, the nightmares
stifled at their root
Cut
Like a thorny-daggered rose in a garden
Too dead to stay
.
His, the hope and happiness
And his, the children's refuge
His, the innocence
And the kinship
And the love for all the seasons
His…
…us
.
We won't forget you, Jamie Bennett
Father, brother, husband, friend.