Me: Hey guess who is trying out a Matt crack fic to be posted on MissehKeehl's DN story, "The Completely Serious Adventures of Super Matt"? That's right! Me! That is if I don't get lazy or play more video games.
Matt: What are you talking about Uchiha? I rather you play those awesome video games instead of putting me through god knows what.
Me: Sorry but I really want to do this! Muahahahahahah!
Matt: -sighs- Uchiha here doesn't own Death Note nor the game characters that appear in this fic. -plays Big Brain Academy-
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A Final Fantasy Encounter by Usagi Uchiha: A Death Note Matt crack fic
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[Bling Bling Beep!] Matt's DS responded back to him as he was listening to Final Fantasy Advent Children in the background. " Man, I love this game!" Matt said as he giggled as he beat another Pokemon. He had all three versions of the ones for the DS but he currently was playing the Diamond version.
"Aww man! Another stupid Ekans again! Forget this!" said Matt as he flipped the switch of the DS. Too bad he forgot to save the game. "Oh shoot! I forgot to save! Gosh darnit!" He threw the DS across the room and it hit Mello's door. A muffled shout could be heard on the other side of the door.
"Matt! It's you that needs anger management, not me!" said Mello as he threw out that insult.
" Yeah I'll go to anger management when I see pigs fly !" Matt shouted back as he got the thought of Mello-like pig flying in the sky. Matt gave a short snort as he tried to get that image out of his head. "What are you doing anyway?" Matt asked as he lazily walked over to retrieve the DS.
"Like you would want to know. Okay...I am painting my toenails.........." Mello said quite embarrassed.
Matt just shuddered as he heard Mello's reply. "Let's just say that I didn't hear that" He then picked up the DS but the DS wouldn't turn on when Matt hit the switch.
"What? It's broken? Darn!" Matt then looked at the shut door of Mello's room. "Uh Mello! I'm going outside to buy a new DS. Do you want some chocolate at Walgreens or somethin' ?" As Matt didn't get a reply, he started to head out.
'Take a deep breath! You can do this!' Matt thought to himself as he hasn't been outside for a month. 'Here I go!' He bravely stepped outside and climbed down the stairs to the sidewalk. 'I made it!' Matt then did a victory dance. 'Yes,yes,yes! I'm awesome!' he thought as he wheezed and huffed down the sidewalk.
'Wait! I forgot to make a map!' he suddenly thought as he started to spazz and hyperventilate. Suddenly his vision swirled as a light purple haze clouded his sight. "Wait! What's going on? Hey.........................." he then suddenly stopped talking as he was flooded with darkness.
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Location: ??????????????
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"Cloud...........Cloud..........wake up! Wake up Cloud!" Matt suddenly opened his eyes and shot out of the bed that someone had put him on. Matt was still dizzy but he tried to make out the person who called him Cloud. His vision then cleared as he took his goggles off from his eyes and put the goggles back on the top of his head. Let's just say he didn't like who he saw when his vision cleared.
"You! You are Kiyome Takada!" said Matt incredulously as he stepped back and made a X with his two index fingers. "Get back! You made me get killed in the Anime and in the Manga! You are evil, Eeeeeviiilll!" Matt cried as he tried to make a run for it.
"Hold on! Who's this Kiyome Takada? I am the great ninja Yuffie!" It was sort of true since Kiyome Takada was wearing a Yuffie Kirasagi outfit. Was it cosplay or what it the real deal? "Cloud, are you sure you are all right? That DS landing on your head might have been to much?" she asked with concern.
Matt snorted again and eyed the Yuffie cosplayer. "Maybe it's you that the DS fell on" he replied with sarcasm as he searched his pocket for a cigarette. After searching for a bit, he found that they were gone.
"WTF? Where are my cigs?" Matt was seeing red and I don't mean his red hair. His vision turned into a crimson furry as he was one step away from getting some Shingami eyes but that's another story.
"Those things? I pawned them off for some Materia" said Takada matter of factly. "Besides, you don't smoke, Cloud" she said as a treasure chest full of Materia shined in the corner of the room.
' I think Takada has finally snapped' Matt thought as he tried to escape the room. As he pulled the heavy door, Takada called out. "Cloud! Make sure you come back with Materia!" She then waved good-bye.
'Yeah sure, crazy woman' Matt then pulled his goggles over his eyes again as he walked outside. "So where am I?" he said as he scanned the outside of the house and the surrounding area. The sky was filled with bright stars as it showed the passing of day into night. There was grayish cliffs in the distance with a few canyons to spice up the deserted wasteland that Matt was currently in.
"Man......This place sucks" He then turned around to find that the whole place looked like the first description but suddenly he spotted Mello's motor cycle laying against the side of the house that Matt had just existed. Matt decided to walk over to it but he kept his distance as he tried to process on what Mello's motor cycle was doing there.
"That means maybe Mello's here" he said as he looked all around for the chocolate eating blond but he was nowhere to be found.
"I guess not........." Matt said as a sudden wind had picked up, causing him to shudder but something else had made him jump. [.Whap.] Matt was alarmed when a bluish black colored cape brushed against his bare arm. Wait...........Bare arm? Matt, absolutely horrified, looked over to his left arm and gave off a loud and girlish scream. He was wearing a Cloud Strife costume and it took him this long to figure that out. Even his goggles were different.
"What, so I am not that observant......." he said to himself as he went to the motor cycle and circled around it, looking for the keys in the process. Matt knew he couldn't stick around as his sanity was slowly slipping away here, not to mention the crazy Kiyome that was located just inside the house that he just came from.
Matt then found the keys in the ignition as he got up onto the leather seat and turned them to the right. With a loud Vrrooom!, the motor cycle started and Matt drove away onto an old road.
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Location: ????????????
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The same landscape could be seen for miles and miles of the side of the road and it was starting to bug Matt. "It's bad enough that I am stuck in this Cloud Strife costume" he muttered as he looked at the ridiculous outfit that he was currently wearing. He then drove pass a destroyed church and saw three suspicious people hanging around there.
"Might as well see what's going on" he said as he made the motor cycle go in reverse and the headed towards the broken down church. What he found there however did not make Matt happy.
" I wonder where Mother is?" asked Gevanni who was dressed in a Kadaj outfit. The others who were with him was Linder who was dressed in a Yazoo outfit and Rester who was dressed in a Loz outfit. All three of them were loitering around, waiting for someone and that someone was Matt who was dressed like Cloud.
'The SPK members?' was all Matt could think about before the three SPK members noticed him and started to circle him.
"Well,well. Look who it is brothers! Our big brother has finally come to find us!" said Gevanni as he placed a gloved hand on Matt's shoulder. Apparently, no one was safe when it came to this weird and crazy place. Matt just shook his head in frustration and confusion.
"Look it may seem that I am in a Cloud Strife costume but I am not a hero. My name is Matt. Besides, Linder there is not a guy so why do you guys call yourselves brothers?" asked Matt as he looked at them in disbelief as he took his goggles off his eyes again and put them around his neck.
"Who's this Linder?" asked 'Yazoo' as she(he?) titled her(his) head at a 65 degree angle and pulled out a magic gun.
"Looks like Big brother's Geostigma has gone to his head" proclaimed 'Gevanni' as he pulled out a silver colored katana. "Maybe a fight might refresh his memory? He then might tell us where Mother is." He then pointed it towards Matt.
"Yeah yeah!" said 'Rester' stupidly as he pulled out a sharp edged electro shocker and also pointed it towards Matt as drooled went down his face.
Matt started to back away. "Listen, I am not your big brother and I don't know who this Mother is. Good bye!" He then started to run towards Mello's motor cycle and hopped on. Good thing that the three SPK members didn't have their motor bikes with them at this time so Matt escaped the broken church and the three SPK members, driving away on to the old road again.
"Don't worry, he'll come back" said 'Gevanni' as he smirked and walked out of the broken church with other two following suit. "There's no way outta here, that's for sure".
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Location: ????????????????????
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Still the same pattern in the landscape was apparent but Matt desperately wanted a change in scenery as his head was filled with thoughts about what was happening to him and what he was finding. 'Ok everyone I have met up with so far has gone insane and somethin' tells me that if I meet anyone else, they will think I am Cloud and start to act strange. So basically, I am doomed' he thought as he spotted a blimp flying in the nighttime sky.
'How can they see in this darkness. They don't have any light's on. Pbbft! Light's ahahahahahah! Light' he laughed as the blimp suddenly took a sharp turn and lowered itself to Matt as Matt stopped the motor cycle.
"Hey! Watch it buddy!" said Matt as he shook his fist at the blimp as it almost hit him on his right side of Mello's motor cycle. The blimp then heeded to Matt's words and gently landed right by Matt. The blimp's door latched open with smoke clouding Matt's vision and a person started to come out of the blimp. Who the person was shocked Matt beyond belief. There, in the smoke clouded platform of the blimp, stood Mello in a Cid Highwind outfit.
'Mello? Is that you?' Matt asked to himself in disbelief as 'Cid' made his way over to where Matt was standing. As he got a few feet in front of Matt he called out to him. "Oi Cloud! Get your butt over 'ere! Everyone's waitin'!" said 'Cid' as he pulled out a cigarette and lit it, making him inhale some of the smoke.
'They even got Mello? What the heck's going on here?' Matt thought as he dumbfoundedly walked over to 'Cid'. He then got motioned by 'Cid' to come aboard the blimp and while Matt passed 'Cid', 'Cid' replied, "Aint she a beaut! This 'ere's my Shera. Named it after Shera maself". Matt just shook his head as he replied back. "Yeah sure........ So who's all here then?" Matt asked as he scanned the inside of the blimp.
His eye caught the three people who were resting against the siding looking out of the blimp's window. Matt couldn't believe his eyes as Naomi was dressed in a Tifa Lockheart outfit, that Rod Ross was dressed in a Barret costume, and that L was dressed in a Vincent Valentine outfit. 'Yuffie' was also located among them. Matt just stood in shock as he saw that they even got L. 'They even got him. Wait...... who are 'they' that I am referring too?' he asked himself as 'Tifa' noticed Matt's presence.
"Cloud!" she exclaimed as she ran over to him and gave him a bone crushing hug. "Ok mister! I have been calling you on the phone but you never pick up! Dilly Dally Shilly Shally!" said 'Tifa' as she backed up so the others could see Matt. Matt, however, just stared at L. 'They got him too.........' He couldn't believe it! Who was doing this was taking this joke a little bit too far!
"What's with that face,Cloud?" asked 'Vincent' silently as he swooshed his cape and then turned his attention back towards the window. Apparently, he didn't like this place either but that was 'Vincent' for you.
"Yo Spiky! We were just heading to Shinra's hospitality center out in the booneys. Apparently, they want to talk to us". 'Barret' said this as he held on to a picture of 'Marelene' which was in turn a picture of Sayu dressed like Marlene.
'Might as well go there' thought Matt as 'Cid' came into the mainframe and sat down into the pilot seat. With a few clicks and changes in gears, the blimp took to the sky and flew off into the distance.
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Location: Shinra's place out in the booneys
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'Man! This landscape never changes' said Matt as he peered out of the blimps' window for the 100th time. No matter where he went, the landscape was the same. It would seem someone made this place to bug Matt but let's not go there right now, shall we? 'Why is everyone acting this way, I wonder if they got Light if they got L but the real question is that, why is this happening to me? It's not like I asked for it. I am not a ex-solder and I am defiantly not a hero............' he trailed off as he saw the metallic silver building in the distance.
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A little bit earlier
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"Oh really? Well maybe you might tell us if you see what I have in my hand" said 'Kadaj' as he threw two ID cards onto the ground with a light clack. The people who were on the ID cards were Misa dressed like Elena and Mikami who was dressed like Tsung. The two were some of Shinra's lackeys that did his dirty work. There was four, however, as the other two were laying on the ground, knocked out.
As 'Shinra' saw these, he replied, "I am sorry but I really don't know where Jenova is, Kadaj. You will just have to trust me on that".
'Kadaj' just got angry and started to head out, with 'Yazoo' and 'Loz'. "Let just say if you are hiding Mother, I will come back to this place. Do you hear me?" he threatened as he walked out of the place with his 'brothers tagging along behind him. After they were gone, the two other lackeys picked themselves up and stood by 'Shinra'.
"Well it looks like I did half of my role already. Come Cloud, where are you?"
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Back to the present
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As the blimp lowered itself down onto the ground once again, the platform had latched opened and Matt along with the others who were on the blimp, followed him into the building. Matt noticed how dusty it was due to a battle that took place minutes before his arrival. A sudden voice made him jump though.
"Welcome, Cloud." Matt turned just in time to see a cloaked person sitting in a wheel chair with two body guards that were right by his side. One was placed at his left side while the other one was at his right side. What got Matt was that the two bodyguards were Matsuda and Mogi who were dressed up as Reno and Rude. Matt then wanted to see who the person in the wheel chair was, so he went over to the cloaked person and peeked under the tan cloak. What Matt saw, made him scream.
"Oh Mai God! Light! What happened to your face????!!!!!!" Indeed it was Light dressed in a Rufus Shinra outfit and Matt had just seen the Geostigma that was currently on Light's face.
"What are you talking about Cloud? Are you sure that you are all right yourself?" 'Rufus' asked innocently as he wheeled himself around Matt to see if he looked okay. Matt was fine on the outside but his mental state, not so good. 'Is no one safe?' asked Matt to himself as his vision started to make him see spots.
Suddenly, someone threw a rock into Shinra's window which made it break and the shards went into the inside. The real important thing was the note that was stuck to the rock. It read:
Dear Cloud,
If you are reading this, that means you are reaching your limit. Come outside and fight me to the death.
Sincerely,
Silver haired stranger aka the one winged angel.
Matt threw out any sense that he had out of his mind as he was prepared to fight whomever was waiting for him outside. He just couldn't take it anymore! He silently slipped away from the others as he frantically went to the door, causing him to go outside into the cold dark night. He ran and ran as he huffed and huffed but then he had reached the final destination. What Matt found however, made him completely brain dead. He couldn't believe it, this person he knew ever since he and Mello were at the orphanage. The one who was emotionless and didn't speak that often. There, standing in the dead center, was Near, dressed in a Sephiroth costume.
"Miss me, Cloud?" asked Sephiroth as he smiled creepily towards Matt. Matt however, didn't want to talk, didn't feel the need to talk. Talking was out of the question as he was prepared to get out of this place! No regrets, no nothing! Matt proudly yelled a battle cry as he took out his executioner swords and started to swing madly at Near. Near side-stepped as Matt swung dangerously by the cliff, then Matt lost his balance and fell off of the cliff.
'I guess this is it' thought Matt as he fell into the darkness as he closed his eyes.
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Location: Matt and Mello's room????
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"Matt..................Matt..........................Matt! Wake up darn it! Buy me some chocolate!" screamed Mello as he tried to shake his friend up. Matt then opened his eyes. The ending credits of the movie he was watching was slowly scrolling down behind him.
"Mello? Is that you? Is it really you?" asked Matt as he wanted to believe that this was the real Mello.
"Yeah who else would it be, you idiot?" Mello said as he folded his arms and huffed. "Shinji Hirako?" Mello sneered as he bit into a piece of chocolate.
"Mello!" said Matt as he hugged his best friend. "I was in this weird place and the whole Death Note cast was part of Final Fantasy Advent Children. Well they were cosplaying and stuff. I was Cloud and you were Cid. It was some crazy stuff" Matt said as he explained the whole experience with his frantic hand movements.
Mello looked at him as like he grew another head. "Forget about the chocolate. I think you need some time by yourself here. And Matt, never watch that movie again. It's giving ya some weird dreams" said Mello as he walked out of the room/apartment.
Silence could be heard in the room before Matt spoke up. "Man! Mello's right.....". He then went over to his PS2 and started to play .Hack//GU. Apparently, Matt didn't learn anything at all. Maybe next time he will.
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A Final Fantasy Encounter
-End-
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Me: It's done! So how was it? Sorry if the ending was cliched. No flames please.
Matt: So what if this doesn't get published by MissehKeehl?
Me: Well then I might just change the title.
Matt: Ever so optimistic, eh Uchiha?
Me: Yeah since this is the first fic I typed without writing it up first. I usually write it down on pencil and paper.
Matt: I am just glad that I am outta that place.
Me: Uh yeah..... -mischievous grin-
Matt: You are not thinking about putting me and the others in .Hack//GU are you?
Me: Maybe.................................. Now please read and review and also read my other stories, called: "Ask Matsuda" and "Beyond's Day Out". Later!