made by the use of the characters' names in this poem
'Twas the night before X-Mas
'Twas the night before X-Mas, when all through the warehouse
Not a creature was stirring, God, I hope that was a mouse
The cobwebs were hung in the rafters to scare,
To grab St. Scully an' Ol' Doggett by the hair;
Dana Scully wishes she were nestled all snug in her bed,
Visions of Fox Mulder dancing in her head;
John Doggett listens, ready to role,
Hoping that what he heard was not the bell's last toll,
When up in the rafters there arose such a clatter,
Scully turned her head up to see what was the matter.
Up the metal steps she flew like a flash,
Wiping out her gun as she heard another crash.
Doggett turned around to see Scully already gone
Knowing again that something was wrong,
When, what to his wondering eyes should appear,
But Scully's falling shoe, and something resembling beer,
With a dodge to the left and a glance to the right,
It was at that moment, Doggett was ready to fight.
At the top of the steps, his progress thus far,
He heard a voice that made his bones jar;
"Now DASH HER! now MASH HER! until she is BEATEN!
With FISTS! With CLUBS, With FEET we are GREETIN'!
Until she is down! Until she does fall!
Now mash away! bash away! dash away all!"
Down the catwalk Doggett quickly flew,
The anger within him began to brew,
Inside the shadows, he saw something swing,
He dodged to the left....Was that a wing?
And then, in an instant, he began to run fast,
But, too late, to stop what had passed.
As he reached Scully's side, she was coming around,
And in that one instant, she was gone without a sound.
He looked to the left, and looked to right,
Scully was now missing, gone from his sight.
All that he saw was poor Scully's gun,
Whatever it was, it was having some fun. The shadows--how they ran, the darkness did scurry!
Together into one, something overwhelmingly scary!
The eyes were huge, lit like fire,
Foretelling the coming of something dire;
It grew and grew baring its teeth,
Hoarding more darkness like a thief.
Its wings spread to a 20 foot span,
Doggett need no more proof, this was neither beast nor man.
He ran down the catwalk, not willing to wait,
Knowing that soon he would be fish bait.
He grabbed hold the ladder and swung around,
Next thing John knew he had hit the ground.
Up on his knees, he knew the strength of his will,
But man, right about now he could use an Advil;
His body was bruised and he'd lost his gun,
He looked up just to see that this thing was not done.
Onward he pushed, stopping at the sound of a moan,
He quickly glanced around then heard the voice groan.
There to his right, what he did see,
Was his partner on the ground, Special Agent Scully.
He kneeled by her side, she was battered and weak,
She grabbed his hand, about to speak;
Instead Scully stopped, her eyes told it all,
The crazy nut monster was about to fall.
Doggett grabbed Scully up into his embrace,
Knowing, once again, it had become a race.
The monster descended laughing all the way,
Screaming out loud that they'd never see the day.
Carrying Scully, Doggett ran a bit faster,
The beast close behind ranting "I'm the Master!"
To the door Doggett sped and into the dawn,
More angry now that they'd been made this things pawn!
Scully looked behind them and to her surprise,
The beast was afraid of the coming sunrise.
At Scully's bidding, Doggett took a glance,
"I'm tired of running, Dana. Let's end this dance!"
Reaching the car, Doggett put Scully down,
He grabbed a shot gun and aimed for the 'clown,'
The monster at the door, still acting crazy;
Doggett pointed the gun, "Hasta la vista, baby!"
The door did explode and another hole in the wall,
In came the sunlight, on him the rays did fall.
Ranting and raving and fading from sight;
"Your Christmas will Suck! You won't forget this Night!"