Chapter 1

I never imagined that getting married could instill in me feelings of joy and misery at the same time. Joy, because I was about to marry a man that I was hopelessly in love with. Misery, because I was almost positive that though he loved me, he was still more in love with someone else.

My name is Hermione Granger, soon to be Hermione Granger-Snape, and the only thing standing in the way of eternal happiness with the man I love is a certain red-headed dead woman who happens to be my best friend's mother. Lily Potter was someone that I both admired and hated.

"A knut for your thoughts?" said a silky voice behind me.

I turned around in my chair and smiled.

"I'm just daydreaming. How were classes?"

Severus groaned, slipping off his robes and hanging them up.

"Dreadful."

"You always say that," I teased.

"That's because it always is." He leaned in to kiss me, the sensation of his warm lips pressed against mine making me moan.

"So what were you daydreaming about?" he asked, sitting beside me at the table and pulling out a pile of essays he was to grade.

"Getting married," I responded vaguley.

---

I stayed awake that night, staring at the ceiling and thinking. I wouldn't have been so worried about Lily if there was no chance of her return - but there was.

Dumbledore had cast a spell on Voldemort a few years before the Potters were murdered. It ensured that if Voldemort permanently lost the war - in other words, died for good - every magical person he murdered from that point on would be brought back to life, unless death was a welcome escape for them. Harry, Ron and I managed to lure the idiot into a no-magic zone and lock him in. He was shackled to a wall with no way to use his powers, and there is only one horocrux that needs to be found. Once we destroy it, we could waltz into the room, stab the bastard to death, and the war would be over forever. Lily, James and every other person he murdered - directly or through his followers - after Dumbledore's spell would be brought back to life. I sighed. Just two years ago, I would have been overjoyed at the prospect of Lily's return. Now, though, I had mixed feelings. If she came back, would Severus dump me and resume chasing after her? Would he stay with me but secretly long for her? What if she finally came to her senses and wanted him too?

"Daydreaming again?" Severus asked, his tone knowing. He had awoken and, apparently, had been staring at me long enough to realize I was depressed.

"What's wrong?" He asked when I didn't respond. His voice revealed that he was feeling insecure - that he was preparing himself for the worst.

"Oh, get off it! I'm not leaving you, Severus. And before you ask, nor do I want to."

He visibly relaxed, but his eyes were still full of suspicion.

"Then why, pray tell, do you look as if someone died?"

"It's not about who died," I mumbled bitterly, "It's about who's coming back to life."

"Ah. You mean Lily."

I didn't respond, staring resolutely at the ceiling and struggling not to cry.

He sighed.

"Hermione, I love you."

"And her." I added.

"I'll always love Lily," he admitted, "But you're the one that I want to spend my life with. You're the only one I want to marry."

"If she loved you, would you marry her?" I was ashamed of how shaky my voice was.

"No." he responded without hesitation.

"What if I never exsisted? What if she was the only one?"

"I..." he took a deep breath. "I hesitated to admit this, even to myself. But the truth is Lily and I would never work. If you didn't exsist, I might have married her - because I would have never been pulled away from my obsession with her. We would soon divorce, though. She hates everything about me. She liked my personality, but that was about it. My intrests, the way I walked, the way I dressed - it all got on her nerves. Every time we argued, she accused me of being a hater of muggleborns. And to be honest, her blind loyalty the "Gryfindors do no wrong." doctrine pissed me off quite a bit. It seemed at times that though she was booksmart, she had no common sense."

"Something you used to say about me," I pointed out.

"I used to," he admitted. "But now I know better. You tried to stop your friends from doing stupid things, and you aren't afraid to tell them when they were being idiots. Though Lily occasionaly did those things, once it came to admitting their wrongs to others, she used every excuse in the book to defend them. It was always my fault that Potter was a bully. Apparently, I tempted him too much because of my fascination with the dark arts. You never made such excuses with the young Potter and Weasley. And you don't think it's "wierd" to be devoted to mastering potions instead of charms. I don't feel exhausted after five minutes of conversation with you. "

I stared at him with soft eyes.

"You're sweet," I whispered.

He looked at me in alarm.

"Don't get cocky. With you, it takes 15 minutes."

I grinned at him.

"I'm going to take that as a compliment and shag you anyway." I said, straddling him.

He leaned up into my kiss, his eyes glittering.

"No objections here," I said silkily, rolling me onto my back.

--

The next morning at breakfast, I was in a very good mood. I had recieved my NEWT scores, and they were absoluetly perfect - I hadn't gotten a single question wrong. The last person to score that high was my future husband. I wasn't worried about anything. At least, not until Harry leaned over and told me the good news.

"Dumbledore got rid of the horocrux last night, Hermione! We get to do the honors of beheading the snake-eyed bastard today!"

I was happy for him. Truly, deeply happy. Harry had lived his entire teen life with the weight of the world on his shoulders, and now, finally, he would be free.

I just hoped Severus wasn't bluffing when he said he was over Lily.