A/N: Welcome to the third installment of my Hogan/Klink saga. You'll notice that this story does not carry the title of an episode. That's because that while "The Flight of the Valkyrie" has some important events in it, I really don't care for it as a story. However, I wanted to include elements of it that I felt were important, including the introduction of the character of Colonel Crittendon. Therefore, unlike the first two installments, you won't be able to watch the episode alongside my narrative. But, please tell me what you think of this work, anyway! First chapter is from Hogan's POV and begins almost immediately after the events of "The Late Inspector General".
Warnings: Same as my previous two HH stories.
Disclaimer: I make no profit. Characters belong to CBS and are lovingly and respectfully borrowed.
The Crittendon Effect - 1
Colonel Robert Hogan spent the first few days after the bombing of the Inspector General's train in a state of slightly nervous anticipation.
He had said things to Colonel Klink that only a complete imbecile would fail to understand that implicated Hogan in the act of sabotage. So far, Hogan had never thought terribly highly of Klink's intelligence, but Hogan couldn't believe that a decorated fighter pilot from the Great War could be that stupid.
Hogan never questioned that he had done the right thing. Really, he had done the only thing he could have done. The Inspector General von Platzen needed to be prevented from removing Klink, either to Berlin or jail, by any means necessary. However, the mistakes that had been made in handling the situation meant that Klink, unless he truly was a vegetable, would figure out Hogan's involvement. So, Hogan chose to expose himself, rather than letting Klink stumble toward the truth on his own, which could be even more dangerous.
The question now was, what would Klink's response be? Hogan spent those first days working out a plan for every contingency he could think of. It ranged from an emergency shut-down and evacuation all the way to the possibility that Klink really was that stupid, and nothing would change.
He was banking on what he felt he knew about Klink's character: timid, and with a strange reluctance to make a genuine effort to distinguish himself. Klink was perfectly happy to accept accolades tossed his way, but was seldom seen actively chasing them down. Hogan had thrown the dice, thinking the probability was that Klink would not want to draw attention to Stalag 13, lest it bring unwanted attention to himself.
However, Hogan had to admit that Klink was capable of surprising him. Klink was not so simple as he appeared on the surface. He might not be ambitious, but he took pride in what he did. And while he showed plenty of signs of being less than enthusiastic about Hitler and the Nazis, he was careful about doing what he perceived as his duty. Hogan had not yet been able to determine if Klink's love for his country could be independent of obedience to its current government.
In addition to being duty-conscious, Klink also appeared to be a man of fairly quick feelings. Hogan had been very surprised (and even slightly alarmed) at Klink's suggestion that they might have been friends if circumstances were different. Friends with a fussy, Prussian aristocrat? I hardly think so! But Hogan couldn't help but be somewhat touched by Klink's apparent willingness to forgive the frankly shabby treatment heaped on him at times, the most recent of which was during von Platzen's visit.
Even more strangely, Klink seemed to have an extremely high tolerance for Hogan's attempts to dominate him physically. The German had a few inches on Hogan, so Hogan had made it a point early on to stand just a bit too close, loom over the desk, or even press against Klink at times. Hogan wanted to determine how much of a natural bully the commandant might be, and was surprised that all of Hogan's physical "threats" were mostly ignored. Instead of getting angry or defensive, or even subconsciously backing away from Hogan's advances, Klink simply tolerated them, and even, on rare occasions, would press slightly back, but in a companionable way, rather than in an aggressive one.
What it all added up to Hogan hadn't entirely determined, so when he was called to Klink's office late on a night a few days after the train explosion, he was hoping that this meant he would finally get the answer on how Klink was going to handle what Hogan had thrown at him. He advised Kinch to listen in on the bug in Klink's office and be ready to move if the situation became critical.
When Hogan arrived in the office, he was greeted by Klink's smug look. That usually spelled trouble. But, to Hogan's surprise, the commandant said he wanted to tell Hogan a joke.
It turned out to be a heavy, very unfunny "joke" about a racetrack tout who needed to "lose" a client that was bad luck. After suffering through it, and listening to Klink laugh heartily at his own supposed humor, Hogan attempted to leave. That's when it got interesting.
Klink began listing the "strange things" that had been happening since Hogan's arrival at Stalag 13: the disappearance of a shot down American plane and pilot, a defector seen in the area...Klink complained that the Gestapo were asking him questions.
"Do I need the Gestapo asking me questions?" Klink asked rhetorically.
"Just what is it you're implying?" Hogan queried. Here we go...
"I am implying that strange things are happening! Tanks disappear and end up in the recreation hall! Trains are blowing up! Out of a locked humidor my cigars vanish!"
Hey! That's not fair! You left it unlocked and you know it!
Hogan sighed, "Are you suggesting that I am responsible?"
"I am suggesting nothing," Klink paused, then continued, "but you are bad luck! I shall have to lose you."
Klink smiled in a way that was most unsettling to Hogan. Klink appeared to be uncommonly pleased with himself.
"Lose me?" Hogan asked. Oh, this could be bad. This could be very, very bad...
But it turned out to be something completely unexpected.
Klink brought in and introduced RAF Colonel Crittendon, newly transferred to Stalag 13 from Stalag 18.
Hogan looked at the older man with a dawning sense of horror. Oh Klink, you are far cleverer than I ever anticipated!
"You had him transferred?" is what Hogan said aloud.
"What is your exact date of rank Colonel Hogan?" was Klink's response.
"You know my date of rank!" stormed Hogan, "and I guess he has about ten years on me."
"Twelve, actually," confirmed Crittendon.
"That makes him senior prisoner of war officer," acknowledged Hogan.
Klink was nodding.
"Nice going, Klink." I will never underestimate you again!
So there it was, Hogan was demoted from his leadership position in favor of an officer who immediately began planning regular calisthenics and parade exercises. Crittendon was so proper it looked like he had been dipped in starch. Spying and sabotage were clearly not to be tolerated under his watch. There was no way Hogan could risk informing him of the Heroes' operation.
Klink was positively glowing with satisfaction as Crittendon took his leave.
"Nice fellow, eh Hogan?" he said with a sly smile.
He held up his humidor, "Would you care for a cigar?"
"If I can't steal them honestly, I don't want them," Hogan snapped back as he left.
Back in Barracks 2, Hogan thought the situation over. The more he considered the situation, the more his respect grew for Colonel Wilhem Klink. What he had done was a stroke of almost pure genius. Klink wasn't fighting back by escalating the situation up his own chain of command which could possibly backfire on him, but using Hogan's own ally to keep him in check. By doing so he was able to get his point across to Hogan that he was aware of the situation and wasn't going to take any drastic action, but he also wouldn't just lie down and let Hogan walk all over him. It was a signal that he was willing to let certain things go, within reason. It was a declaration of a truce, of sorts, but a cautious one, and definitely not a surrender.
By the time Hogan had thought through the situation, he retired to bed in a considerably better frame of mind than he'd had when leaving Klink's office.
"All right, Klink," he murmured to himself, "you've shown that you're willing to play. Perfect. That I can work with. Welcome to the game."
To be continued...
A/N:Next chapter will be from Klink's POV