After finding out jace was my brother, Simon confessed his love for me. I decided after Simon kissed me in the kitchen that maybe Simon was a good distraction from the heart ache I've endured from finding out about jace and i. I wasn't sure if my feeling for Simon were the same as his for me but being with him felt comfortable and easy. I guess I hoped that eventually I could fall for Simon and love him the way he loves me. I hoped anyway.

I lay in Simon lap watching him play Xbox, he played some first person shooting game, I wasn't paying much attention my eyes closed, when I herd the game stop and the controller hit the floor. I opened my eyes finding Simon starring at me. i sat up kneeling in front of him.
His hand slipped behind my head and tangled into my curls.
"Clary" he breathed leaning his face to mine brushing his lips across my nose and then my lips, it gave me goose bumps. His lips pressed on mine soft at first as soon as my lips parted for him our kiss grew deeper and more intense. He pulled me onto his lap, my legs straddling his hips my arms wrapped around his neck running my fingers over his back and shoulders, Simon s hand ran up and down my back gradually working his way to my hips his hand griped them tightly pulling me closer to him I made a noise of surprise against his lips as I didn't expect Simon to be so ... So .. Dominate. He kissed down my neck nipping at my jaw line making my breathing heavier in pleasure. He is extremely good at this I thought as his hands spread across the small of my back pressing me in him as he kissed along my shoulders, my strap to my stress slid down my shoulder his lips moved down to the edge of my dress covering my chest. my body moving on its on, my head flinging back as he kissed along the hem and across what breast was exposed I pushed my chest out to him. a moan escaping my mouth as his hand began to fondle one of my breast as he kissed and nipped.

Just as I was really getting in to it Simon quickly detached my arms from around his neck, lifting me from his lap back onto the bed, I pulled up the straps to my dress, Simon began fishing for his controller on his floor.
"Knock knock''
"Simon are you home? Can I come in?"Simon s mom yelled through the door.
" yes and yea mom" Simon yelled back giving me a wink.

Simon s mom walked in " oh Clary honey didn't realize you were here. how are you and your mother?"

i looked down and the floor trying to hide the blush from our shenanigans a few minutes before.

" moms still in the hospital, no sign of any changes "i said still looking at the floor hoping she wouldn't notice.

" oh Clary sweetie"
She rushed over to me and sat beside me putting her arm around my shoulder." Darling, it will be okay. your mum will come to, soon enough you'll see, any day now" she pulled me in to her chest for a hug.

she squeezed tight and released me. turning to look at Simon.
" Simon I'm working late tonight you and Clary are welcome to stay here and order pizza or something''

she turned back to me. ''Clary I spoke to Luke he said its fine for you to stay here. he also offered if you both can stay at Luke s as he will be at the hospital again tonight. "

she gave Simon $20, kissed both Simon and I on the forehead and said her good byes closing the door behind her, her heels clicking down the stairs as she left for the night.

Simon looked at me and shrugged
"so what you want to do?"
I wasn't sure what I wanted to do, I pulled my phone out of my bag on the floor to bide some time while I decided what I wanted to do, new message flashed across my screen, I didn't even hear it ring, stupid thing must be broken again, phone number 4 in 8 months great Clary. Opening message I tried to hide the surprise from Simon. it was from jace.

* Clary I nee hav 2 talk 2 u about something ca 2nite?!***

What on earth does he need to speak to me about? I had to admit I was curious.

** k were do I meet u ? **

I closed my phone and looked up at Simon he was starring at me, glasses sliding down his nose.
" si I have to go do something tonight, I could come back here after tho?"
Simon pushed his glasses up his nose and gave me a puzzled look.
" okay what's so important fay?"
Why does he have to ask so many question.

i scrambled around my brain looking for a viable reason, that Simon would second guess.
" izz said she found someone who might know something about my mum."

I lied I didn't want him to know I was seeing jace, he would over react even tho Simon knew jace and I are siblings. I still felt he was jealous of jace.
I grabbed my bag swinging it over my shoulder giving Simon and kiss on the cheek.

" see ya later right? Save some pizza for me huh? " I said walking out of Simon s room I ran down the stairs and straight out the front door I walked slower across his front lawn and down the block until I was defiantly out of Simon s view , pulling my phone out of my pocket the message icon flashed on the screen.

** can u meet me at taki's ? 7?***

What's the time now?, I looked at the top of my phone screen. half past 6 shit.

I ran down to the subway getting on the first L train I could see. as i took my seat, I caught a glimpse of my self in the windows reflection across from me wow my hair!. I roughly tugged my fingers through my hair attempting to make my hair a bit presentable, I decided to give up on my hair and looking down at my outfit I was pleased that I picked that black and pink floral dress, stocking, my new doc's and matching it up with my leather jacket. "Clary what are you doing you shouldn't care what your wearing it's your brother your seeing" I mentally scolded myself .
I got up as the voice over the PA announced my stop was next.

Jace pov

Were is she?. I thought nervously shredding the paper napkin onto the table. Looking at my phone for the 50th time 7:20 and no message. Maybe something happened to her.
" are you sure I can't get you something?" This waitress was persistent.
I flashed her a smile" no I'm still waiting for someone"
She gave me a sympathetic face.
" just flag me down if you change you mind" she gave me a wink and walked away but not before she turned to look at me biting her pen seductively.

The bell from the front door brought my attention I turned, my heart raced, she came! Her fiery locks slightly messy from the wind, she looked stunning I couldn't help notice her dress was a little sorter than her usual choices and showed her fine legs and the stocking slightly see through, ugh! Clary why you do this to me?!...
She smiled at me and I got up to pull the chair out for her she sat and I returned to my seat.
" so what's going on?" She asked me tucking a strained of her red locks behind her ear.
" well um here's the thing Clare ..."
Before I could go any further ... Thank god ... That flirty waitress returned.
" ah we are all here then, ready to order?" Eying off Clary, I didn't much liked the was she looked at Clary.
I cleared my throat breaking her glaring eyes off of Clary.
" can I get the .." I looked at the menu and picked something at random.
"And for you Clary I gestured for the waitress to take Clary's order.
She ordered one of the pasta from the menu and a coffee.

After the waitress left with our order Clary looked over to me
" so what were you saying ?"

I took a deep breath
" Clary I ... Ah I need to ask you something, it's completely stupid but I need to hear it"
He eye brows lifted curiously .
" um Clary I'm just gonna spit it out
Do you love Simon ? Or are you with him because of us ?"

Clary chocked a little her eyes wide from being caught of guard .
" um jace why are you asking these questions?"
" because I love you whether I am your brother or not I love you , and if you were with Simon because you love him and want to be with him over me then maybe I could let you go just maybe ... But I need you to know I don't care that we are bother and sister I love you more than anything in this world and want you to be happy I just need to know you love him and not me and that you are happy "

Clary took a breath and ran her fingers through her hair closing her eyes, my throat want dry and tight waiting for her to reply.
" jace .. I love you to more than I can describe I always have . I thought you just wanted to be brother and sister I thought you didn't care if I dated Simon , he was there jace I needed the distraction I couldn't possible love any one else the way I love you jace " with that her hand reached over the table to mine I wrapped my hand around hers rubbing my thumb over her knuckles. My Clary loves me , I love her.

our food came moments later, the waitress attention lingered a moment to long on me, i ignored the waitress. starring only at Clary, marveling how this beautiful woman could love me, but she did, Clary loves me!. we ate our food discussing issues like her mother and all the things we could think of that would possibly bring her mother back.

once food was done we decided to walk around town for a bit not ready to say good bye to each other yet.

Clary's pov

Oh how I wish I had= paper and a pencil ,he looks so perfect under this lamp light.
We've Been walking around the street for an hour now talking, his hand in mine he led me to a park to a bench and we sat and talked my head resting on his shoulder his breath was Even and steady, relaxing.
" jace do you ever think about our kiss in the green house?" Jace looked At me his eyes not leaving mine, his hand reached out running his fingers along my chin lifting my face to his " I have always wanted to kiss you again and again every day of my life"

his lips crashed to mine my breathing hitched as he bit my lower lip softly my lips parted to allow his tongue to battle mine for dominance. his hands ran down my back to my hips pulling me onto his lap my legs either side of his hips,
My hands clawed into his back. our kiss grew deeper and more urgent, his hand gliding down the side of my thighs , as I kissed down his neck to his star shaped birth mark on his shoulder his hand tightened into fists around my stockings they ripped, sending the rip all the way down my leg. He moved his mouth back to mine, whispering against my lips.
" I want you Clary, I need you". He whispered in my ear.

this sent shivers down my spine. i opened my eyes to look into jaces golden eyes. am i doing?. Simon. what about Simon?. Clary don't be unfair to Simon, i thought.
" I can't do this to Simon he is still my boyfriend jace" I pried his arm from around my waist and got up from his lap, collecting my bag " I'm sorry jace" I said running to the road out side the park flagging a taxi.