Falling

Disclaimer: I do not own Gossip Girl or any of its characters.

Thanks to Tatiana!!

"You can't just show up here." Vanessa's voice rang out and caused Nate to stand up. He'd been slouching on the floor outside Vanessa's apartment waiting for her to return from work.

"I know, Vanessa, but if you just let me-"

"Explain?" She was glaring at him now. "Look, Nate, I had a hard day at work, so I'm really not in the mood."

"It'll only take a second," Nate said, his eyes locking with hers.

She relaxed her shoulders to let him know he could speak again.

He was falling over his words and she was still listening.

Any worries he had melted away because it was still there: that feeling of ease that washed over him when he saw her pretty eyes shining back at him.

"Okay, so, before, you didn't talk to me. You went to everyone else but me, and you were the only person I told everything to. I just wanted the same from you."

"So it was all my fault?" Vanessa asked, tears glazing over her eyes.

She had felt so guilty. He could have had his life back if she hadn't interfered. Here was just more confirmation that he blamed her, too.

She turned to put the key in her door, needing to get out of this conversation.

Nate put his hands on her shoulders, but she just shrugged him off.

"No, Vanessa! That's not what I'm trying to say at all," Nate tried to reassure her.

Before he could finish, she managed to get the door open and scurried inside, practically slamming the door in his face.

Nate decided not to let the wood door between them stop him from talking to her.

Not that he knew if she could hear him or not.

"You always listen to me, and no one else ever does that. They don't really hear what I have to say. They don't even care, but you do. You always do."

He paused to take a breath and his mouth pulled into a small smile when he heard her breathing behind the door.

Gaining more confidence, he continued, "You also have patience with me, and I realize now I should have let you explain. I should have listened. At the very least, I owed you that. So I'm sorry, Vanessa. And I know it's late"

"You can say that again," she deadpanned through the door.

He almost chuckled at her response but refrained. It wouldn't really help his cause.

Instead, he said in earnest, "I know I'm always late, but if you need somebody, then I'm here. And I'll wait because I need you in my life."

The door creaked opens and Vanessa stepped out. "You really mean that?"

"Of course," he said, without hesitation.

"Then follow me."

And so he did.

He followed her to a seedy bar to pick up her severely drunk sister.

Vanessa was dragging her sister out from back of the bar by her wrist.

"I don't need my little sister to take care of me," Ruby slurred as she tried to release her wrist from Vanessa's grasp, without much success.

Nate eyed his surroundings, not really sure this was where he expected Vanessa to bring him.

"What's the pretty boy doing here?" Ruby asked.

"It doesn't matter. You're just trying to side track me, anyway," Vanessa sighed, getting more and more frustrated with the current situation.

Nate threw Vanessa a reassuring smile and Vanessa's face automatically responded with one of her own. That's how it always was around him, natural reactions always getting the best of her.

Ruby's eyes started to wander; she hadn't really been listening to Vanessa, anyway. Instead, she was looking for a half-finished beer she could snag.

"Ruby!" Vanessa snapped her fingers at her sister.

"Ugh! I'm still not going with you. You can't make me," Ruby whined.

Nate and Vanessa both rolled their eyes at that remark. It reminded Vanessa of a three year old, and it reminded Nate of Blair, during one of her worst tantrums.

"There are two of us and only one of you," Nate observed.

"You're not gonna lay a hand on me. You're too much of a gentleman for that, I think."

"I don't know. What do you think, Vanessa?" He raised his eyebrows, giving her a look that sent a chill down her spine.

"Well," she said with a smile. "He does have a penchant for standing me up, not to mention sleeping with married women."

"I suppose I deserve that one," Nate said, his eyes never leaving Vanessa.

"So he's a jerk, boo hoo. I'm still not going anywhere."

And with that Nate picked Ruby up and threw her over his shoulder. "We're riding the subway, right?" He asked.

Vanessa nodded her head as she laughed at the ridiculous sight in front of her.

A goofy smile adorned Nate's perfect features at the sound of her laugh. He missed that laughed almost as much as he had missed her.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

"I can't believe she bit me," Nate murmured.

Vanessa giggled and said, "She didn't break skin, though, right?"

Nate stretched out his arm to show her the bite mark just above his right wrist.

Vanessa gently ran her fingers over the cut, once more than was really necessary.

"I think you'll live," she assessed.

"That's a relief. I can breathe easier now," he beamed.

Vanessa's mind flashed to a previous moment between the two.

"When you called today, it just felt like, like I could breathe again."

Vanessa pulled back from the memory and smiled. "So, thanks for your help tonight."

"It's the least I could do."

They just stared at each other for a moment, settling in the comfortable silence.

She was so beautiful with her caramel skin and those adorable dimples. It almost broke his heart to look at her, but he could never look away, because that would hurt more.

Vanessa broke the silence and asked, "You wanna watch a movie or something?"

And Nate nodded his head.

He let her pick the movie because he knew how much it meant to her and he was just happy being there. He watched her face widen when the girl cried over her dead son. How she tucked a curl behind her ear when the suspense started to build and leaned forward. All these little things fascinated him because there was so much he didn't know about her yet, but he knew he would never be able to know enough.

He was watching her watch the movie, with his eyes on her, and it was giving her chills again.

The back of her mind was usually formulating, on the lookout for something, but sometimes she just let go completely and didn't think.

That was how she always ended up hurt.

Because whether she knows better or not, when Vanessa Abrams gives you her heart, she gives you everything. And all she wants is the same in return.

To love and be loved.

So there she was, looking over at the blue-eyed boy in front of her, and even though he had hurt her before, she couldn't let go.

She didn't even want to, because he was smiling that smile.

When his lips spread into that grin, her heart raced and it was like they were the only two people on the planet.

And sometimes she wished they were, because things would be less complicated then, right?

Of course they would.

He took her hand in his and soon his bottom lip was brushing against hers.

Whispered words and heavy breathing, slow kisses and pounding hearts.

That was how they spent the rest of night.

Falling further into this abyss of whatever it was they were doing.

They would save thought for another day.

At that moment, just being close was enough. All they needed, really, was each other.

To love and be loved.

The End