It Doesn't Take a Genius
Something wasn't right. Shego lowered her magazine and looked around trying to figure out what it was. She could here Drakken laughing in the next room so she knew everything was fine over there. That meant that something had changed in her room. Her eyes narrowed, she had made it quite clear to all the henchmen that her room was off limits. That meant that either one of them had been foolish enough to brave her wrath or...
"Nope, not here Rufis." a pause, "Wait, this is sick and wrong! What is Drakken planning to do with a draw full of girls underwear?"
Shego realized what had been off, there was clothes all over the floor. Turning around in her chair she saw Ron holding up a pair of her unmentionables, looking squicked out.
"Did it occur to you that more than one person has to live in this lair?" She asked as she lit up her hands.
"Wha?! Uh..." Ron tripped backwards and winced as he hit the floor before scrambling backwards away from Shego, "Hey, uh... I don't suppose that you'll let me just apologize and leave, would you? We're both sidekicks, that kind of makes us like brother and sister. Well except that I am not related to you and you are evil and... Eep!" Ron winced as a plasma blast hit in front of his feet.
"That would be a no. Where's Possible?" Shego stood up and stretched keeping an eye on the sidekick.
"She's dealing with DNAmy. Something to do with Octopeyes"
"Don't you mean octopi?" Shego asked
"No, I meant octopeyes" Ron shuddered, "don't ask"
"Okay..." Shego blinked a few times before deciding to stop that line of questioning, there were somethings she just did not want to know. "But that doesn't answer the question of 'what are you doing here' as far as I know Drakken finally finished repairing the place after Fridays fight. He hasn't had time to start any new projects."
"Yeah, well..." Ron scratched the back of his neck nervously, "I lost my belt during the fight and I was hoping that I could find it..."
Shego raised an eyebrow, "Your belt? What is it a family heirloom or something?"
"No... well, Kim gave it to me for our halfiversary. I still don't get what that is though..."
"So you came to get a gift that the princess gave you?" Shego asked smirking, "Aww... Isn't that sweet."
"Hey, a guy has to do his best for his girlfriend!"
"Right, and where is the rodent?"
"Rufus? He went with Kim, I figured that she could use the help"
"So that means that it's just you and me?" Shego said taking a step forward, hands raised and plasma on full.
"Um... yes?" Ron squeaked, realizing just how much trouble he was in.
"Good" Shego suddenly sat back down and crossed her arms. Ron surprised at this reaction stopped cowering for a second, but didn't let down his guard. Shego looked at the young man speculatively, "So I've been wondering... How come you act so stupid?"
"What?" Ron said taken aback by the question "Uh... Well I wouldn't say stupid, maybe just not as smart as everyone else, uh, in most..." He stopped as she raised a glowing finger towards him
"No I mean it, you are smarter than you let on."
"Huh?"
"You think I am blind? I saw what you did when you were evil, twice I might add. The first time I could attribute to the fact that you got your wires crossed with Drakken, but that doesn't explain why he was still able to invent things. No, somehow you have super genius intellect in your head. What I want to know is why you never use it..."
Ron looked stunned. "uh..."
"I mean going evil or good doesn't give you any special abilities, I should know, I've done it more than once." Shego winced at the memories, "and yet you gain all kinds of skill when you go evil. That means that it isn't the machine that gives you power, it's that you hide it most of the time" Shego looked at Ron curiously, "So tell me, what gives?"
Ron sighed and leaned back against the wall "You really are something Shego, you know that? Kim's been with me for years and never realized it, Wade is a super genius, and Mrs. Dr. P is a brain surgeon and they never guessed."
She looked at Ron, and at the calm he that was on his face and suddenly felt a wave of fear. There was no trace of his goofy smile, no trace of the fear that he had shown earlier, only calm confidence. "Whatever. What is your deal?" She flared her hands without realizing it and realized that she was on her feet in a crouch. She would have felt foolish, but there was something wrong with Ron, she was reminded of how he had been when he was Zorpox, but this was different even than that.
"My deal? Simple, you can call me a... Caretaker. Ron isn't home right now, or at least not the Ron that you know. You were forcing him to see the truth, and that made me have to step in and do something"
"You're a caretaker? Right... so where is Ron and why does it matter to you what he knows or doesn't know?"
"Ron is asleep. And it matters a great deal to me what he knows and what he doesn't know, considering that I was created to stop him from ever realizing his potential"
"Wait, hold on, who created you?"
"Ron"
"Ron created you to keep himself from realizing his potential? Yeah, excuse me if I don't exactly believe you" Shego narrowed her eyes, even if this wasn't the sidekick speaking it was still his body, and she doubted that it was in very good shape, all she would have to do is outlast him till his body gave out.
"Hey, I didn't say your Ron created me, I said Ron. As in, the true Ron, the one that made both of us."
"You're not making any sense, you know that?"
"Fine, tell me this, is Drakken happy?"
Shego blinked at the non-sequitur, ".Well..."
"He tries to take over the world and end up in prison most of the time, am I wrong?"
"No..."
"And why is that do you think?"
"Because he is a mad scientist."
"And that is more true than you realize Shego. He is probably one of the 10 smartest people in the world"
"You're kidding me. Dr. D? He needs to be reminded to put on his pants some mornings! He isn't a genius at all."
"That's where you are wrong Shego. You know better than that I'll wager. He is able to understand, if not invent brilliant devices in almost every field of science. Sometimes he steal the devices, but to even understand the theories from so many branches of science... That is pretty impressive."
"Okay, you're right, Dr. D is clever, but what does that have to do with Ron and you and... Ron?"
"You figured it out yourself, Ron is a genius, even smarter than Dr. Drakken. Consider that for a moment."
Shego did, and realized what this person that claimed to be Ron's caretaker was getting at, "You're saying that Ron is one of the top 10 smartest people in the world?"
"I am saying that as far as I know, he is the smartest"
"Ok, that is bull. If he was so smart why didn't he take over the world? He should have been easily been able to do it"
"Because I was working against him. I won't go into the details, suffice to say that when you have multiple personalities your partially shielded from the effect of the attitudinator." Ron shuddered, "Not that I ever want to go through that again"
"Ok, so Ron wasn't able to completely use all of his mind while he was a villain, but this doesn't answer the question of why he would want to stop himself from being a genius in the first place"
"Ah, but that was what I was getting too. I know why Drew went evil, and why you turned evil and stick by him. The only difference is that Ron saw it coming and decided to do something about it"
"What do you mean" Shego glared at Ron, she knew that no one could know what had happened. It was impossible.
"Simple, you realized that glowing rocks give you cancer, not superpowers. Yet here you are, with superpowers and no cancer, so what happened?" Ron raised his eyebrow in a rather smug way, "You asked around and found out that you had been given an experimental treatment at the hospital. No one would tell you who had invented it, and you went looking. Eventually you ran into Drew. He was out on the streets. You found out that he had saved your lives, but his college had stolen his idea and used it for his thesis. In a fit of rage he had destroyed the research and his college's paper, and was thrown out of university." Ron paused then shrugged, "Or something like that. And you said thank you and you were nice to him. You comforted him, you even helped him get revenge. And that was where it started. All Drew had wanted was to help people, and yet every time he tried he was laughed at, and stolen from. Now with a warrant out for both of you he made a decision, one that almost every genius makes. If the world wouldn't recognize him for his genius, than they would at least fear him for it. You were wanted too, and he had saved your life, so you stuck with him."
Shego sat in shock. Ron had hit most of the highlights, and while not everything was correct, enough was that she knew he wasn't guessing, "but... How?"
"It's obvious. It's a choice that every genius ends up being forced to make. One that leads to a life of unhappiness. As I said, Ron was smart. So he made a choice. He would go to sleep and live his life as a normal person. He created Ron to be exactly as he was, without the brain power, and me to watch over him to make sure nothing went wrong. I can change how smart Ron is from moment to moment. I keep things fairly equal, make sure that nothing bad happens to him. Make sure that he never has a chance to go evil." Ron paused, "You know he could conquer the world quite easily if he went villain. If I hadn't managed to hold out during the attitudinator you would be living under the rule of Ron. Consider the fact that he is still a teenager and be glad that you aren't."
It took Shego a second to realize what he was getting at, "He would make a a..."
"A harem? Yup, almost every teenage males dream. And be under no illusions, you would be in it."
"Ugh! That is just wrong!"
"You're telling me. Anyway, Ron realized that too and so that was the other reason why he created Ron and me, it was a way to save the world from himself."
"And he has never come out since?"
"Once he did, that was to genetically engineer Rufus" seeing Shego's look he looked at her in annoyance, "What, you think that normal mole rats are able to talk and do kung-fu? He transfered 1 percent of his mind over to Rufus."
"Okay...and why should I believe you?"
"It doesn't matter if you do or not, but I felt that you should know the truth. You are the first person to guess my secret. Sides" Ron grinned, "Didn't you want to know more about the guy you're crushing on?"
"WHAT?!!"
"Oh come on, it doesn't take a genuis to figure out that you have a crush on Ron and Kim"
"Ok, that is the stuppidest..."
"Really, I know that Ron is the only guy you see on a regular basis that you can stand. When Kim isn't around you don't even attack. Often you burn off my pants just to try to figure out what I am packing, and don't think I haven't noticed you ogling Kim and I.. Not saying anything will come of it, just noting that you do."
"That is it Sidekick, you are going down!"
"If it isn't true that why are you so angry?"
With a cry Shego launched herself at Ron intending to do him great bodily harm. She was surprised when he caught her hand and pulled her into a back flip that ended with him straddling her. Both of her arms were pinned to her side. She struggled to get up, to get away from this thing. She tried flaring her hands but stopped when she realized that it would have no effect on this thing on top of her than managed to slip her hands underneath her while she struggled. "You won't get away with this!"
"Isn't that Kim's line?" the thing looked down on her using Ron's face, "Goodnight Shego." She saw him raise his hand and flick her in the forehead, then everything went black.
.x.X.x.
Shego opened her eyes. She was on the floor. What had happened? Her head felt like somebody had used it for a training dummy. Slowly standing up she saw a puddle of water and a crack in the ceiling. Wait, there was no way... Shego cursed softly realizing that she had tripped and hit her head. Scowling she stalked off to tell Dr. D that his lair needed better maintenance, though she would never admit to falling. Shego didn't slip and fall. She could only imagine what the others would say. Kim would laugh and the Sidekick would make some kind of joke. This would definitely be her little secret.