Hey, y'all, it's Akiraka speaking. I'll start out with the blanket disclaimer and all that jazz: I DO NOT OWN NARTUO, NOR SHALL I EVER. But that's OK. I'll also point out that as this is a alternate setting fic, the characters are bound to be a little OOC... but that's OK too. Anyways, thanks for reading, and please enjoy!
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"What's in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet.
So Romeo would, were he not Romeo call'd,
Retain that dear perfection which he owes
Without that title."
- William Shakespeare, The Tragedy of Romeo and Juliet
1.
He doesn't even know her.
Not… well, anyway.
He has no idea what she looks like.
Where she lives.
What she does for a living.
She could be a serial killer.
All Naruto Uzumaki, age 26, single, resident of apartment 8E in an orange building on Lawson Avenue, knows about the woman of his dreams is her shy disposition, her favorite color, and her name.
Hinata Hyuga.
It's music to his ears.
Naruto slides into his roommate's chair, logs into his roommate's computer, and tries to ignore said roommate's petulant sounds of dinner-making. He prays to whatever god is up there that Hinata is on.
hhyuga100: hey, naruto.
He falls over trying not to fall over.
rmnluver99: Sup, babe.
He hopes she's blushing.
hhyuga100: naruto! D:
He loves it when she does that.
rmnluver99: Just kidding.
rmnluver99: How was your day?
…
hhyuga100: hard.
hhyuga100: boring.
hhyuga100: u?
She's such a teenager.
…Wait.
Shit.
rmnluver99: Great.
hhyuga100: really?
rmnluver99: No.
hhyuga100: :D
rmnluver99: Listen, Hinata.
rmnluver99: I'm not trying to sound like a stalker or anything, but how old are you?
hhyuga100: i'm 26.
Naruto feels like kissing someone in relief, but the only person around is Sasuke.
And his roommate is gay enough already.
rmnluver99: You sure?
hhyuga100: yes, naruto, i know my own age.
hhyuga100: why?
rmnluver99: Oh, nothing.
hhyuga100: no, really. why?
rmnluver99: Um, just making sure you aren't 14.
hhyuga100: why on earth would you think i'm 14????
hhyuga100: …
hhyuga100: it's the lowercase letters, isn't it.
rmnluver99: And the smilies.
hhyuga100: that doesn't make me a teenager!
rmnluver99: like, omg, rly? no way.
hhyuga100: are you making fun of me?
rmnluver99: lol.
hhyuga100: well, then, mr. uzumaki. how old are you?
rmnluver99: 26.
hhyuga100: liar!
rmnluver99: No, honestly! I'll be 27 next October.
rmnluver99: I think my roommate is trying to get me a spot in a nursing home.
Please be laughing.
hhyuga100: haha. :D
hhyuga100: well, while we're divulging secrets
hhyuga100: i wanna know where you live.
Naruto blinks.
rmnluver99: What, like an address?
rmnluver99: Do you want a credit card number with that, too?
hhyuga100: no!!!
hhyuga100: just… a general area?
hhyuga100: i'm curious, that's all.
rmnluver99: New York.
hhyuga100: oh, really? the city?
rmnluver99: Yeah?
hhyuga100: oh my god, i live in new york too!
Naruto feels his heart flutter.
No, not flutter.
He has some dignity left.
rmnluver99: Is that so. Small world.
hhyuga100: small as 8 million people.
rmnluver99: :D
hhyuga100: :P
rmnluver99: Well, what part of New York do you live in?
It isn't a stalker question. It's not!
hhyuga100: i live in an apartment over by grand central.
rmnluver99: Posh.
hhyuga100: it isn't, really!
hhyuga100: it's very ordinary.
hhyuga100: i promise.
She's so self-conscious.
It's so cute.
rmnluver99: Did your dad set it up for you?
hhyuga100: …yes.
rmnluver99: Only the best for daddy's little girl, right?
About a minute goes by, and Naruto knows he's said something wrong.
hhyuga100: yep.
Naruto hastens to make up for his faux pas.
rmnluver99: I could be your neighbor, you know.
hhyuga100: you better not be!
hhyuga100: my neighbor is a 70 year old french man with a fat, gray cat he treats like his first born son.
rmnluver99: Zut alors, Fluffikins, she's on to us!
He can hear her laugh.
It sounds like bells.
hhyuga100: :D
hhyuga100: but really. you aren't, right?
rmnluver99: Of course not.
hhyuga100: good!!!
hhyuga100: i mean.
hhyuag100: yeah.
She's blushing, he knows it.
hhyuga100: tell me where you really live.
hhyuga100: please?
rmnluver99: You know New York Snapshot, right?
hhyuga100: yeah?
rmnluver99: Did you see the one with Drew Barrymore coming out of the Starbucks?
hhyuga100: yeah?
rmnluver99: That's where I live.
Wait for it.
hhyuga100: …you live in a starbucks?
Success!
rmnluver99: No!
hhyuga100: :D
rmnluver99: I live in the orange building in the background.
hhyuga100: wow.
hhyuga100: impressive.
hhyuga100: you're a regular celebrity, naruto!
rmnluver99: You know it.
"Naruto, God damn it, get out here and eat the fucking food before it gets cold."
Naruto leans back in his chair and sees Sasuke standing in the door.
In a frilly black apron.
…He's so gay.
Naruto snorts.
rmnluver99: sry, g2g.
hhyuga100: :P
hhruga100: good night, naruto.
Naruto sighs.
rmnluver99: Yeah.
rmnluver99: Good night, Hinata.
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