I didn't necessarily set out to be the bad guy. I mean, nobody says, "I want to be an evil ginger cat when I grow up," do they? It just sort of happened. And, let's face it, those Jellicles aren't the brightest crayons in the box. Who in their right mind would spend an entire evening singing and dancing? I think of it as my duty to keep them on their toes.
Anyway, there I was, a newborn kitten and those idiot Jellicles name me "Macavity" meaning "Son of Cavity". Well, first of all who wants to be named after their dad, and second of all I'd never even heard of this Cavity dude! I guess it could have been worse and they could have named me Cavity Junior instead, but that's not much consolation. I decided to put up with the name
just so as I could check out the joint. So, they "adopted" me into the tribe and things went along swimmingly for awhile. That was, until some old cat tried to teach me sewing. Okay, so maybe I shouldn't have gashed her shoulder but there was no harm done, I just had to apologise. So I muttered an apology and soon I was embroidering the prettiest cushions in the whole tribe.
Well, it was at about that time that the Big Boss told us we had to start singing and dancing to get ready for the Jellicle Ball. He wasn't too happy when I refused, point blank, to dance. I didn't have a problem with singing but for some reason as soon as he heard me he told me never to sing again. So I'm sitting on the car watching the others dance at this "Ball" thing when it occurred to me that the Jellicles thought they were the feline version of the Brady Bunch the way they never fought or anything. Well, no way was I going to be turned into the next Greg Brady so I up and left them.
A few years on the streets is enough to make even Munkustrap, that little goody-two-shoes, a bit bitter. I wasn't doing too badly for myself really though, I'd become a master criminal, I employed a dozen or so rats and I converted all the strays nobody wanted, and so eradicated the unemployment problem. I'd sometimes abduct a kitten or two but Munkustrap always rescued them. Jerk! Well, after getting myself a few agents I found out about the next Jellicle Ball and decided to capture the Big Boss. The plan went off without a hitch. Then, just for a laugh I pretended to be the Big Boss, but that little brat Demeter saw through my disguise. She and Munkustrap are perfect for each other, they both like ruining my fun. Anyway, I decided to kidnap Demeter but of course Mr. "I'm So Perfect" had to rescue her. He then tried to fight me so I scratched him up pretty bad and then finally, as I left, I blew every fuse in the joint. When I got back to my lair I discovered that the Big Boss had been
conjured away by some Jellicle. If they'd only told me they had a magician I would have saved myself the trouble of kidnapping the Boss in the first place!
The Jellicles think they beat me, but let's face it, 20 odd (and they are VERY odd) cats against 1 ain't really fair. I blame all my bad luck on Cavity Dude. Lately, I've been trying to get the Jellicles to call me Scrumplauna instead of Macavity but so far, no dice. Munkustrap says you can't sing "Scrumplauna: The Mystery Cat" and I guess he's right but he doesn't even sing the blasted song anyway so what's his point? He's always sticking his nose into other cats' business, that's his problem.
Anyway, look for me next time you hear a crash. Demeter's bound to call out 'Macavity!" as per usual so you shouldn't have any trouble. Oh, and try not to let those idiot Jellicles suck you into dancing. The embroidery's not so bad, all my chairs and cushions are embroidered now, it took me hours to do but it was worth it. Just don't tell the Jellicles or they might think I'm going soft. And so long as I have even a shred of self-respect I can't let them think that. Oh, and I WILL get Munkustrap one day... honest!
Anyway, there I was, a newborn kitten and those idiot Jellicles name me "Macavity" meaning "Son of Cavity". Well, first of all who wants to be named after their dad, and second of all I'd never even heard of this Cavity dude! I guess it could have been worse and they could have named me Cavity Junior instead, but that's not much consolation. I decided to put up with the name
just so as I could check out the joint. So, they "adopted" me into the tribe and things went along swimmingly for awhile. That was, until some old cat tried to teach me sewing. Okay, so maybe I shouldn't have gashed her shoulder but there was no harm done, I just had to apologise. So I muttered an apology and soon I was embroidering the prettiest cushions in the whole tribe.
Well, it was at about that time that the Big Boss told us we had to start singing and dancing to get ready for the Jellicle Ball. He wasn't too happy when I refused, point blank, to dance. I didn't have a problem with singing but for some reason as soon as he heard me he told me never to sing again. So I'm sitting on the car watching the others dance at this "Ball" thing when it occurred to me that the Jellicles thought they were the feline version of the Brady Bunch the way they never fought or anything. Well, no way was I going to be turned into the next Greg Brady so I up and left them.
A few years on the streets is enough to make even Munkustrap, that little goody-two-shoes, a bit bitter. I wasn't doing too badly for myself really though, I'd become a master criminal, I employed a dozen or so rats and I converted all the strays nobody wanted, and so eradicated the unemployment problem. I'd sometimes abduct a kitten or two but Munkustrap always rescued them. Jerk! Well, after getting myself a few agents I found out about the next Jellicle Ball and decided to capture the Big Boss. The plan went off without a hitch. Then, just for a laugh I pretended to be the Big Boss, but that little brat Demeter saw through my disguise. She and Munkustrap are perfect for each other, they both like ruining my fun. Anyway, I decided to kidnap Demeter but of course Mr. "I'm So Perfect" had to rescue her. He then tried to fight me so I scratched him up pretty bad and then finally, as I left, I blew every fuse in the joint. When I got back to my lair I discovered that the Big Boss had been
conjured away by some Jellicle. If they'd only told me they had a magician I would have saved myself the trouble of kidnapping the Boss in the first place!
The Jellicles think they beat me, but let's face it, 20 odd (and they are VERY odd) cats against 1 ain't really fair. I blame all my bad luck on Cavity Dude. Lately, I've been trying to get the Jellicles to call me Scrumplauna instead of Macavity but so far, no dice. Munkustrap says you can't sing "Scrumplauna: The Mystery Cat" and I guess he's right but he doesn't even sing the blasted song anyway so what's his point? He's always sticking his nose into other cats' business, that's his problem.
Anyway, look for me next time you hear a crash. Demeter's bound to call out 'Macavity!" as per usual so you shouldn't have any trouble. Oh, and try not to let those idiot Jellicles suck you into dancing. The embroidery's not so bad, all my chairs and cushions are embroidered now, it took me hours to do but it was worth it. Just don't tell the Jellicles or they might think I'm going soft. And so long as I have even a shred of self-respect I can't let them think that. Oh, and I WILL get Munkustrap one day... honest!