Feel Your Way

by Princess Serenity-chan

When Takumi is visited by someone he used to be close to, the green-eyed monster hits Gii hard. An assignment with a delicate topic as well as deprivation from his lover don't make things easier and finally the situation becomes too much for Gii to bear.

A/N: This story was done as a special request. One of my dear readers asked me a good while ago if I could write a story including a smexy scene where Gii's and Takumi's roles are reveresed, meaning Takumi becoming the seme and Gii the uke. So, I wrecked my brains how this could be achieved. I could have taken the easy way out and gone for the typical "dream scenario", but there wouldn't be any fun in that, right?

And before anyone screams "out of character", here's what I thought when I started writing this fic: Before watching the fifth movie in cinema last August I would have probably agreed, but now I've changed my mind on that subject and Takumi's behavior and actions in this fic are based on what I saw in "Ano Hareta Aozora". One reason why I love the movies so much is that we can see how Takumi's character slowly changes as his relationship with Gii progresses.
While he was clearly inferior and still afraid to speak his mind in "Niji Iro no Glass", even when he felt himself being treated unfairly by Gii, not to mention sexually relatively passive, things began to change in "Bibou no Detail". There, for the fist time, he stood up to Gii and gave him a good piece of his mind when Gii announced that they should stop seeing each other. There was some development in their sexual relationship as well. Takumi initiated the kiss that led to them making love in the concert hall and he was more active, trying to give back as much as he received. Finally, in "Ano Hareta Aozora" Takumi is equal to Gii in every respect. He isn't afraid anymore to stand up to his lover and can actually be pretty backbiting when he's angry with Gii about something he considers important. The same goes for their sexual relationship.
Considering all those facts and after having seen all the movies countless times I don't think it impossible anymore for Takumi to be in control for once when being intimate with Gii or trying something new.

Alright, enough said. Please enjoy reading "Feel Your Way" and feel free to leave me a review with your thoughts.

Bethan-darling, this one is dedicated to you! Sorry, for making you wait so long!

Disclaimer: I don't own Takumi-kun Series. I only own this story and the character I introduced to it.

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Feel Your Way

Gii felt himself being pushed gently but determinedly onto the bed as soft lips pressed sensually against his own. After a short moment of surprise he surrendered to Takumi's erotic advances and responded eagerly, allowing his lover to take the lead. As soon as he felt Takumi's tongue brushing playfully against his lips, demanding entrance, he parted them willingly to give his boyfriend further access. The ebony-haired boy deepened the kiss with ardent passion and began to explore the warm, moist cavern of Gii's mouth, causing him to moan softly in pleasure as their tongues came together for a heated and sensual dance. When Takumi finally broke the kiss after several long moments both boys were breathing hard.

Their eyes met and smiling affectionately Gii reached up his hand to trace the contours of his boyfriend's face in a loving caress. He slowly traced his fingers along Takumi's jawline and down his slender neck until he reached the collar of the boy's shirt where he set to work on the first button. He was just about to unfasten the second one when Takumi intercepted his hands unexpectedly. "No, Gii," the ebony-haired boy whispered seductively, "not this time." With that he tightened his grip around Gii's wrists and pushed them down onto the pillow. He then shifted his weight a little and pinned his lover down underneath him, smiling mischievously.

"T-Takumi…," Gii stammered, his eyes wide with surprise at his boyfriend's unusual actions. "W-What are…?" The amber-haired boy wasn't given the chance to finish his question as Takumi silenced him with another deep, lustful kiss. Once he had pulled away, he slowly trailed sweet, feathery kisses along Gii's jaw, all the way up to the boy's ear where he began to lick and nibble playfully in a seductive manner. Gii squirmed as he felt pleasure shooting through his body like electric jolts and tried to free his wrists from Takumi's hold, desperate to touch the one he loved, but to no avail. "Don't move Gii," the ebony-haired boy ordered in a velvety voice. "Leave your hands where they are and relax."

"H-Hai," Gii sighed breathy, his mind starting to go blank. With a sultry smile playing about his mouth Takumi resumed his erotic actions. He slowly kissed his way back to Gii's mouth from where he let his lips travel down his lover's neck, nipping and licking the sensitive skin, thus coaxing soft moans out of the boy. "Unngh!" Only a short while later Gii felt Takumi's hands roaming over his chest in addition and he pressed his head further into the pillow, every single one of his boyfriend's caresses heightening his desire. Takumi continued his assault on Gii's neck and began to unfasten the buttons of the boy's shirt. He let his fingers ghost along the button tab and left hot, burning kisses on every bit of skin that was revealed as he slowly brushed more and more of the fabric aside, soon exposing the complete upper part of Gii's body to his mercy.

"Ta…ngh…Takumi," the amber-haired boy gasped out, gripping the bed sheets tightly when he felt his lover's fingers circling teasingly around one of his nipples. The ebony-haired boy lapped a few times at the sensitive skin around the hardening nub before he took it into his mouth. He licked and sucked the nipple playfully while gently massaging and squeezing the other one with his hand, which caused Gii to shudder and sigh in pleasure. "A-Ahhh!" "Gii," Takumi whispered endearingly as he kissed his way over to the other nipple to continue his sweet, sensual torture. "Does it feel good," he asked velvet-like.

When Gii answered with another moan of pleasure, Takumi let his hands slowly travel over the amber-haired boy's chest and stomach, down towards his abdomen. "Let me make you feel even better," the ebony-haired boy purred as he undid his boyfriend's pants and pulled them down, clearly enjoying the idea that he had so much power over the boy, who usually used to be the more dominant partner in their relationship. With a sultry smile he brushed his fingers teasingly over the thin fabric of Gii's underwear and began to kiss his way back up to his lover's mouth. The moment their lips came together for another heated, passionate kiss Takumi slowly slipped his hand into the amber-haired boy's boxers…

The unpleasant sound of the alarm clock ripped Gii out of his erotic dream. He blinked a few times and sleepily turned his head only to find the other half of his bed empty. "Another dream," he whispered to himself, a mix of embarrassment and disappointment evident in his voice. He let out a small sigh and sat up slowly, groaning as he felt the evidence of his desire throbbing painfully between his legs. How long had it been since Takumi's last visit and their last love-making, nine days, ten days? Cursing silently the amber-haired boy rose from the bed, running a hand through his ruffled hair with a desperate sigh as an image of his lover's smiling face appeared before his eyes.

Recently schoolwork, his duties as dorm head and the freshmen following him around had kept him from meeting his boyfriend, let alone spending some private time with him and he had to admit it, he was Takumi-deprived, literally. The mere thought of his lover's beautiful, delicate face resulted in him becoming incredibly excited. He wanted nothing more than to feel Takumi's warmth, to feel the boy's body pressing intimately against his own, to touch him and to feel his touch in return. "It's Friday. I still have some things to do but I'll ask Takumi to come over tonight anyway," he muttered as he grabbed a towel from his closet and headed for the bathroom to take a morning shower, a long cold one.

oOo

Akaike grabbed his breakfast tray from the service counter and let his eyes wander over the slowly but steadily crowding cafeteria. Once he had spied his best friend at an empty table in the corner of the room he strolled over and sat down opposite from him. "Ohayo Gii," he greeted smiling mildly. The amber-haired boy looked up for a moment and returned the greeting. "Ohayo Shouzo." With that he turned his attention back to his meal and silence settled between the two friends. Akaike shrugged his shoulders at Gii's sparing of words, which was unusual and began to eat, occasionally glancing over to the handsome upper-class man who was poking at his food without any appetite. "You look pretty tired Gii," the head of the disciplinary committee remarked casually, a bemused smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. "Did you have a rough night?" The amber-haired boy snorted in response. "Kind of," he finally replied, rolling his eyes at the expression on his friend's face. "But not for the reasons you think." Hearing that Akaike's smile disappeared and he became serious almost instantly. "What's wrong Gii? Do you want to talk about it," he offered amicably, his voice laced with concern. "It's not like you to be so gloomy." "Thanks for the offer Shouzo, but let's go somewhere else," the other boy answered, smiling gratefully at his best friend.

Once the two boys had finished their breakfast they quickly exited the cafeteria and went for a walk on the campus grounds. "Alright, Gii spill. What's on your mind," Akaike asked and nudged his friends arm lightly. "Dreams, Shouzo. Dreams," the handsome-upper class man sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Dreams," the black-haired boy asked a little surprised and sat down on one of the benches that were placed here and there over the campus grounds. "Are those dreams by any chance related to Hayama?" Gii nodded slowly and sat down next to his friend, another small sigh escaping his lips. "How long has it been since you last met," Akaike asked gently with a knowing smile on his face. "It's been about nine or ten days since we met in private," the handsome upper-class man replied, unable to hide the longing in his voice.

Nodding the head of the disciplinary committee put his hands on Gii's shoulder to squeeze it comfortingly. "You're missing him, aren't you," he mused. "You're lovers after all and I can imagine that the current situation must be hard for both of you, not being able to meet whenever you want to. So I guess it's only natural that you dream of Hayama sometimes. I'm sure it's the same for him." "It's not the fact that I dream of him, that bothers me," Gii answered truthfully. "It's the kind of dreams and their frequency." "You're having wet dreams about him, haven't you," Akaike stated matter-of-factly. The amber-haired boy didn't reply, but the faint red color that was evident on his friend's cheeks told Akaike that his guess had been correct. "Isn't it normal to have those dreams sometimes," he said carefully in an attempt to make Gii feel more at ease. "Why are you bothered so much by them?"

Silence settled between the two boys and Akaike waited patiently for his friend to answer his question. "Do you remember that biology assignment, we got two weeks ago," Gii finally asked hesitantly, his eyes fixed on the ground before him. "Yes," the black-haired boy answered, confusion written all over his face. "You mean the essay about the brain, the one that's due next Monday, right? But what does that have to do with your erotic dreams?" "Actually a lot," the handsome upper-class man replied with a sigh. "The topic the teacher assigned to me is about the part of our brain that controls our sex drive, our sexual desires and the impulses that stimulate that part, stuff like scents, sounds, pictures and phantasies, you know…" Gii's voice trailed off and he ruffled his hair in desperation.

"I see," Akaike stated with a serious expression on his face as understanding slowly dawned on him. "I guess since you've started to work on that essay and since you haven't met Hayama for some time, you've been having 'those' dreams more often." "Exactly," the amber-haired boy admitted, blushing. "But it's not only that, you see? It's the nature of those erotic dreams." He fell silent for a moment as if searching for the right words. "In my dreams Takumi and I do things we've never done in reality and it's driving me crazy," he finally stammered quietly, blushing an even deeper shade of red. "I simply can't get those pictures out of my head no matter how hard I try."

Akaike nodded understandingly and patted his friend's back. "I'm not a psychologist," he explained. "But the way I see it, your dreams are simply the result of your own sexual phantasies. You know, things you'd like to try in bed with Hayama, but for some reason never did." "Thank you Dr. Freud," Gii replied and couldn't help but chuckle. It was incredibly relieving to be able to talk to someone about those kinds of things. "You're welcome," the black-haired boy said, smiling mildly. "I'll send you the invoice later." The handsome upper-class man laughed lightly at his friend's comment and the awkwardness that had overshadowed their conversation until that moment disappeared at last.

"Can I ask you something personal," Akaike queried, getting serious again. "Sure," the amber-haired boy answered smiling. "What is it?" "Have you ever spoken to Hayama about your sexual phantasies? Have you ever mentioned to him that you would like to try something different in bed with him, something new," Akaike asked carefully. "Actually I haven't," Gii replied quietly. "I've thought a few times about telling him, for sure, but I don't know if he's ready for it." "I see," the black-haired boy said thoughtfully. "You don't want to pressure Hayama because of his phobia, am I right?" "Something like that," the other boy sighed and hung his head, hoping that his friend wouldn't ask any further about Takumi's 'human contact phobia'. Although he knew that he could trust Akaike, that the boy would never share things that were meant to be kept to himself with others, Gii didn't want to tell him that the true reason why he hadn't shared his sexual phantasies with his boyfriend so far was related to the experience that had triggered Takumi's phobia, the repeated sexual abuse by the hands of his older brother.

Sensing that talking explicitly about Takumi's past illness made his best friend uneasy and uncomfortable, Akaike quickly tried to change the direction of their conversation. "Anyway," he continued nonchalantly, "about Hayama being ready or not for new sexual experiences, you'll never know for certain unless you ask him. And who knows, maybe his answer might surprise you." Gii's head shot up upon hearing those words. "What do you mean, Shouzo," he asked in confusion. "Are you trying to say that…" "Exactly! I'm trying to say that Hayama might have thoughts similar to yours. He loves you dearly after all and he trusts you unconditionally," the president of the disciplinary committee explained.

"You mean that maybe he has…" the handsome upper-class man stammered, realization dawning on him and Akaike nodded smiling mildly. "Given the depth and the strength of your relationship it would only be natural if Hayama had phantasies about you as well," the black-haired boy continued. "But considering that he naturally shy, even with people who are close to him and that he tends to keep thoughts or feelings to himself, I don't think he would discuss those kinds of intimate things with you, even though you're lovers. So you have to make the first move." Gii nodded slowly. "You might be right," he mused and sighed again. "It's just that I'm worried about Takumi's reaction. I don't want him to think that I'm unhappy or dissatisfied with our current love life because that's not true." "Then you should tell him so. You two have been lovers for a long time now and it shouldn't be a problem to talk openly about the sexual desires and phantasies you both have, regardless if you turn some of them into reality or not," Akaike advised.

"Don't worry too much about this Gii. Hayama has changed a great deal since he has become your boyfriend and even if he isn't ready yet to be a little more adventurous with you in bed, I think he's more than ready to, at least, talk about this stuff." With that the black-haired boy patted his friend's back encouragingly and flashed him a reassuring smile. "Thanks Shouzu," Gii said, smiling back. "I feel a lot better now." "That's what friends are for, right," Akaike exclaimed and rose from the bench. "But we should head back or we're going to be late for homeroom." The amber-haired boy nodded, rising to his feet as well. "By the way, are you going to ask Hayama to come over to your room tonight? At the student assembly this afternoon would be a good chance to ask him personally without arising any suspicions." "That was the first thing on my mind after I woke up this morning, believe me," Gii replied and laughing lightly the two friends made their way back to the school buildings.

oOo

Once the student assembly had ended Takumi headed back to the dorms accompanied by his friends. While he was chatting animatedly with Shingyouji and Misu, Gii focused on a conversation with Akaike in order to not arise any jealousy among his numerous followers and ardent admirers. He would have enough time to lavish all his attention on his boyfriend later, since Takumi had agreed to pay him a private after dinner. The group was just about to leave the building when a secretary of the student affairs office approached them. "Hayama-kun," the middle-aged woman addressed Takumi with a smile. "You have a visitor. I took the liberty to ask him to wait for you in the entrance hall of your dorm because the assembly had still been in progress."

"Thank you," the ebony-haired boy replied politely, confusion written all over his handsome face. 'A visitor,' he thought. 'Who could it be?' As if reading his friend's mind Shingyouji spoke up. "Ne, Hayama-san, who do you think your visitor is, a friend, a relative?" "Don't be so curious Shingyouji," Misu reprimanded his pet sternly, causing the younger boy to cast his eyes shyly in embarrassment. "It's none of your business." "I have no idea, Shingyouji-kun," Takumi replied and lightly squeezed his kouhai's shoulder in a reassuring manner, telling him that he hadn't overstepped any boundaries with his question. "I'm as curious as you are. I don't expect any visits from my family and all of my friends are here at Shidou."

"Then let's hurry back and see who this mysterious person is," Gii suggested, trying hard to conceal his own curiosity. Considering the fact that Takumi wasn't on good terms with his parents, it was unlikely that they would visit, especially without informing their son beforehand and he couldn't remember that his boyfriend had ever mentioned anyone else who would be close enough to him to pay him an unexpected visit during a regular school week. The other boys nodded in agreement and they quickly resumed their way back to the dorm grounds. Before entering the building Takumi took a deep breath in order to calm his racing heart. Ever since his enrolment at Shidou he had never received any visits and consequently he was nervous and excited.

He let his eyes wander over the entrance hall until they came to rest on a tall, handsome young man in his early twenties, wearing a casual but fashionable outfit. The tight-fitting shirt accented his muscular chest and broad shoulders in all the right places, his brown medium-length hair was cut stylishly in an asymmetric fashion and his eyes, that were of a rich, dark-brown color, shone brightly. He was definitely the type of guy who could make any girl swoon. "Salut, Takumi," he greeted the new arrival with a loving smile, his voice a warm deep baritone. "Masaka," the addressed boy stammered, blinking his eyes in sheer disbelief while the rest of the group was staring questioningly back and forth between their friend and the stranger. "Ma-Mamoru!"

What happened next the boys could have never imagined in their wildest dreams. Takumi dropped his schoolbag, flew across the room and flung himself into the older man's awaiting arms. The handsome stranger lifted him almost instantly into the air and spun him around a few times, both boys laughing wholeheartedly. Once he had put Takumi back down he pulled him into a tight, loving embrace. Gii, Misu, Shingyouji and Akaike could only stare motionlessly at the scene in front of them. Their jaws had dropped to the ground, unable to believe their eyes, completely at a loss for words and Gii found himself unable to breath at the sight of his beloved boyfriend lying in another man's arms and so readily at that.

"D-D-Did you just see what I saw," the usually composed and collected Misu stuttered, utterly stupefied and all the others could do was to nod slowly. When Takumi finally pulled away from the young man's embrace, the stranger ruffled his hair and kissed him tenderly on the forehead, which caused the on-looking boys to gasp. "Ça va, mon cher Takumi," he asked softly, a warm smile gracing his handsome features. "Ça va bien, merci," the ebony-haired boy replied, his smile equally warm. "I see you remember the French I taught you," the unknown man stated chuckling. "To be honest, from the French I do remember you have just heard about ninety percent," Takumi admitted, blushing lightly. "But before we continue talking let me introduce you properly to my friends."

With that he turned to face the others who were still having perplexed expressions on their faces. "Minna, this is Hayama Mamoru, my cousin," he beamed. "Because his father was transferred to his company's branch in Paris, the whole family moved to France when I was still in elementary school. Mamoru, please meet Shingyouji Kanemitsu, Misu Arata, Akaike Shouzo and Saki Giichi, who is usually called Gii." "It's nice to meet you all," the young man exclaimed and exchanged friendly greetings with the boys who were trying to regain their composure as quickly as possible. 'There goes my date with Takumi tonight,' Gii thought bitterly, but kept smiling politely at the new acquaintance, if only for his boyfriend's sake. "I'm really sorry to be rude," Mamoru said, smiling apologetically after several minutes of small talk with the group, "but could I steal my cousin away for a few hours? We have a lot to catch up on." Takumi's face was glowing with happiness at those words and the boys nodded their agreement.

"But why don't we all meet for dinner tonight? I'd like to get to know you better," the young man continued. "I'm staying at a small hotel in town and I was just informed by the lady in the student affairs office that the second- and third-year students are allowed to leave the school grounds on Friday and Saturday nights as long as they are back before midnight." The boys couldn't refuse such a polite invitation from their friend's relative and Takumi smiled at his cousin with adoration. "Then shall we meet at 6pm at the school gates," Mamoru suggested, checking his watch. "I think there's a bus at 6:10pm." Gii, Akaike, Misu and Shingyouji agreed and after exchanging a few more friendly words with them, the brown-haired boy placed his arm casually around Takumi's shoulders and the two cousins left the dorm chatting and laughing happily. "What was that," Shingyouji exclaimed after the pair was out of hearing range. "I never thought I'd see the day of Hayama-san being so affectionate with a man other than Saki-senpai."

"It is quite surprising," Akaike stated. "Especially because of his shy nature. And have you seen his face?" "I've never seen that kind of expression on it, unless he's with Saki or talking about him," Misu added, astonishment evident in his voice. The others nodded in agreement and Gii kept staring after the retreating figures of Takumi and his cousin. "I don't like this guy," he hissed as he crossed his arms in front of his chest and narrowed his eyes tightly behind his glasses. "I really don't like him!" Upon hearing those words Akaike placed a hand on his best friend's shoulder, squeezing it lightly. "Gii, do you know how to write the word 'jealousy'," he asked chuckling and the amber-haired boy only growled in response.

oOo

As promised, that evening Mamoru treated Takumi and his friends to dinner at a small, comfortable restaurant in town. The young man turned out to be a very sympathetic, intelligent guy of an easy-going and cheerful nature. He chatted animatedly with everybody and all the boys had a good time, except for Gii that was. The handsome upper-class man was unusually quiet and seemingly in a bad mood. "I see," Mamoru stated with a smile. "All of you, except Shingyouji-kun, are going to graduate from Shidou in spring. Then I guess you're going to be quite busy with your studies for the final and entrance exams from now on. Do you already have any preferences concerning college and university?" Akaike, Misu and even Shingyouji explained excitedly about their plans for the future while Gii kept poking sulkily at his food. Noticing how quiet the amber-haired boy was, Mamoru addressed him directly. "And how about you, Saki-kun?" "I hope to enter Tokyo University to study business and business management since I'm supposed to take over my father's company one day," Gii explained, forcing a smile. "And I hope that Takumi will be accepted at a college or university in Tokyo as well, so that we can continue seeing each other regularly and maybe even become roommates again."

With that he glanced at the ebony-haired boy who couldn't help but blush at his lover's affectionate words. "I believe you haven't told us yet what you're doing." "I'm studying international law in Paris and I'm going to enter grade school this September in order to get my master degree," Mamoru explained. "So, because I'm going to be really busy from autumn onwards, I've decided to make good use of my summer holidays and to visit some of my friends here in Japan as well as my relatives, especially my little cousin here." His voice trailed off and he turned to ruffle Takumi's hair in a loving caress, who smiled happily at the intimate gesture. "Last time we met was about four years ago, but ever since I had moved to France, we always used to write to each other regularly. However, after Takumi had enrolled at Shidou and I had entered university those letters and emails somehow became few, usually only two or three a year, that was all," the young man continued. "So I was desperate to see my cousin because we've always been very close, even with thousands of kilometers of land between us."

Falling silent again he gazed at Takumi for a long moment, with nothing but adoration and affection radiating from his face, causing Gii's eyes to darken dangerously as he drew in a sharp breath. Close relative or not, how could that guy dare to touch his beloved boyfriend so intimately and to give him those loving looks. "I missed you too and I'm really glad that you've decided to surprise me with a visit," Takumi beamed, not noticing the ill-humored expression on his lover's face that seemed to grow darker with every passing minute. "So am I," Mamoru replied smiling. "Four years ago you were still a kid and look what a handsome and attractive young man you've become. I was really amazed when I saw you back at the dorm this afternoon." "Mou, Mamoru. Don't say that," the ebony-haired boy stammered and cast his eyes, blushing deeply at his cousin's compliment, which caused the young man, Akaike, Misu and Shingyouji to chuckle. "But it's true," the university student retorted. "Then let me return your compliment," Takumi said, a shy smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. "Because you look very good yourself." "Well, thank you my dear little cousin," the older boy exclaimed and placed his arm gently around Takumi's shoulder, pulling him closer.

That was the last straw for Gii and he rose abruptly from his seat. "I'm sorry, I'm not feeling very well," he hissed, literally glaring daggers at his lover's cousin. "I'll return to Shidou. Please excuse me and thank you for the dinner." With that the amber-haired boy headed for the exit while Akaike, Misu and Shingyouji exchanged knowing glances, but chose to keep silent. Takumi however had risen to his feet as well, startled by Gii's unusual behavior. "I'll be right back," he muttered and quickly followed his boyfriend, managing to catch up with him just outside the restaurant. "Gii," he exclaimed and grabbed the boy's arm. "What's wrong? You've been strangely quiet all evening. Are you unwell," he asked softly, concern evident in his voice as well as his on his face. The handsome upper-class man turned around to face his lover, regretting his earlier outburst immediately when he noticed the worry reflecting in Takumi's beautiful eyes.

"I'm sorry," he apologized and massaged his temples as guilt, for worrying Takumi and for ruining his and Mamoru's reunion with his own childish behavior, started to well up inside him. "It's nothing, really. I'm just tired," he lied and ran his hand tenderly over Takumi's cheek, trying to reassure the boy. "All I need is a good night's sleep and I'll be fine. Why don't you go back in to rejoin the others and enjoy the rest of the evening." "Is it really okay," the ebony-haired boy asked hesitantly. "If you prefer we can go back together. Just let me tell Mamoru and the guys. I'm sure they'll understand." "Thanks love, but that won't be necessary," Gii replied softly, smiling mildly. "But do you think I could get a goodnight kiss?" "Of course you can," Takumi whispered and rose to his tiptoes. He then rested his hands on Gii's shoulders and placed a sweet, lingering but innocent kiss on his lover's lips.

oOo

Saturday morning dawned brightly, but Gii rubbed his eyes groggily when his alarm went off around nine o'clock. He hadn't slept well, thanks to the scenes of the previous day that had kept replaying in his mind for most of the night. Takumi who smiled beautifully at Mamoru, Mamoru who was so intimate with his younger cousin, constantly touching, hugging, even kissing him and Takumi who didn't seem to mind it, quite the contrary actually. No matter how hard he tried, Gii just couldn't stop thinking about the recent events or getting those pictures out of his head and it was driving him insane with jealousy.

His thoughts drifted back to his own behavior at the restaurant the evening before and guilt as well as embarrassment immediately washed over him. Not only had he been terribly impolite and lost control over his feelings, but he had caused Takumi to worry and had almost ruined the evening for him. He knew that he had overreacted and acted childishly, probably without any reason, Takumi and Mamoru were cousins after all, but he just hadn't been able to help himself, still couldn't. The mere idea of another man being as close to his beloved boyfriend as Mamoru was, kept wreaking havoc in his mind. When had he become so possessive over his lover? "I should talk to Takumi again about yesterday and apologize once more," he sighed to himself. "He's probably still worrying about me because of my foolish behavior." With another deep sigh Gii pushed back the covers, slipped out of the bed and began to get ready for the day.

As luck would have it he ran into Takumi as he made his way from the dorm over to the cafeteria. "Ohayo, Gii," the ebony-haired boy greeted him, smiling beautifully. The handsome upper-class man didn't return the greeting and remained silent which caused Takumi's smile to falter. Instead Gii let his gaze wander briefly over the area as if looking for something. When he had made sure that there was nobody around he grabbed his lover's wrist and pulled him off the graveled path, over to a clump of trees that would effectively shield them from curious and unfriendly eyes. "G-Gii," Takumi exclaimed nervously and confused as he stumbled after the amber-haired boy. Once they had reached the group of trees he felt himself being pushed against one of the large tree trunks and the next moment his lips were sealed with a passionate kiss. As soon as he had recovered from his surprise, Takumi responded with equal passion and wrapped his arms tightly around Gii's neck. The handsome upper-class man lost no time to deepen the kiss and a soft sigh of pleasure escaped from Takumi's lips the moment he felt his lover's tongue swirling around his own in a playful caress.

"Ohayo, Takumi," Gii finally breathed sweetly after he had pulled away. "G-Gii," the ebony-haired boy stammered breathlessly, blinking his eyes in confusion and astonishment. "What was that about?" "Nothing," the other boy stated nonchalantly with a mischievous smile on his lips. "I just felt like giving you a morning kiss, that's all." As their fingers intertwined Takumi smiled warmly at his boyfriend. "Are you feeling better today," he asked gently. "I'm alright, thank you," Gii replied softly and placed a tender kiss on Takumi's forehead. "I'm really sorry for worrying you." "I'm glad that you're alright," the ebony-haired boy said, a relieved smile gracing his delicate features. "What are you up to today?" "I have a meeting with Shouzo and the other dorm heads after breakfast," the handsome upper-class man explained. "Some of the first-and second-year students are recently taking the dorm rules a bit too lightly and there have been some minor incidents. We have to decide what we're going to do about this problem and if we're going to report the students who are concerned to their homeroom teachers for punishment or if we're going to let the disciplinary committee handle the issue. How about you?"

"I'm going to meet Mamoru in about one hour," Takumi beamed, checking his watch and Gii's eyes darkened momentarily. "And we agreed to have dinner together again tonight, just the two of us, because he's going to leave tomorrow around noon to visit some of his relatives and friends in Tokyo." Gii noticed the shadow that was clouding his lover's face for an instant at the thought of his cousin's departure, but even though he felt for Takumi he couldn't help feeling relieved at hearing the news. "That means you're going to be free this afternoon," he inquired, smiling and the ebony-haired boy nodded. "Do you think you could spare your boyfriend an hour or two of your valuable time?" "Do you even have to ask," Takumi whispered softly. "When and where would you like to meet?" "Let's say 2pm in my room," Gii replied. "Since it is Saturday most of the students won't be in until tonight." "I'll be there," the other boy breathed and the lovers shared another slow, lingering kiss before parting their separate ways.

oOo

The two cousins met at the school gates and for some time they walked the campus grounds in comfortable silence. "Hey Mamoru, would you like to see my favorite place," Takumi asked when they came close to the greenhouse. "Sure, why not," the young man agreed and allowed himself to be led away from the main path to the traditional Japanese gazebo, that was surrounded by well-tended flower beds. The two boys sat down inside the pavilion, quietly taking in the atmosphere for a while. "Isn't it beautiful," Takumi asked softly into the quiescence and Mamoru nodded in agreement. "It's very serene and peaceful, the perfect location if you need a quiet place to think, wish to be alone or want to meet your sweetheart. Do you often come here?" "Yes, I do," the ebony-haired boy answered. "I practice the violin almost every day in the greenhouse and usually come here after that. I also meet Gii here from time to time because this place is a little secluded and not many students pass this way." At the thought of his boyfriend, an affectionate smile played about Takumi's lips and it didn't go unnoticed.

"So, what's the story between you and Saki-kun," Mamoru asked curiously. "You haven't told me directly, but from the way the two of you look at each other I can tell that you're more than just close friends. You are lovers, aren't you?" Takumi nodded and a faint blush crept onto his cheeks. "Last year Gii and I were roommates," he explained. "Shortly after moving in he confessed to me, but even though I had always admired him from afar ever since I came to Shidou, I tried to push him away at first and to keep him at distance." "Why," the university student asked gently. "It was because of my 'Human Contact Phobia', as Gii used to call it," the ebony-haired boy replied quietly. "However, with his kindness, patience and the love he kept constantly showing me he gradually changed me. Not only did I open up to him and began to trust him, but I also fell for him and finally managed to overcome my phobia thanks to the sincerity and depth of his feelings for me. Gii cured and saved me. Thanks to him I was able to make a lot of good friends and became more sociable."

"I understand," Mamoru stated thoughtfully. "Your feelings for that guy go far beyond a temporary infatuation. He means a great deal to you, doesn't he?" "Yes, he does," Takumi replied truthfully, love and admiration radiating from his handsome face. "I love Gii more than anything in this world. I can't imagine a life without him anymore." "It sounds like Saki-kun is the perfect boyfriend, always kind, loving, considerate and caring," the older boy said, smiling. "Is he also a good lover?" "Ehh," Takumi exclaimed in surprise and blushed deeply. Nobody had ever asked him a question like that and he had never talked to anyone about his intimate private life with Gii. "I guess he must be something special if you allowed him to touch you, despite of your phobia," Mamoru mused and gently patted his cousin's back.

After a moment of silence Takumi finally nodded shyly. "Gii is always very gentle with me and treats me dearly like a treasure whenever we make love," he explained hesitantly, his eyes cast down and his voice barely more than a whisper. "I like the way he kisses, touches and caresses me when we become one, the sweet endearments he whispers…" "That sounds pretty good," the Mamoru stated, winking at Takumi with a mild smile on his face in an attempt to make the boy feel at ease. "Have the two of you ever tried anything in bed, besides the usual I mean?" "N-No, not really," the ebony-haired student stammered, meeting his cousin's gaze at last. "Why do you ask something like that?"

"I'm asking because a satisfying love life is as important to make a relationship work well as are love, trust and honesty and I'm asking because I have the feeling that you never had the chance to openly talk to anyone about this subject," the young man explained calmly, his voice serious. "Even if both of you are perfectly happy with your current intimate private life, there's nothing wrong with spicing things up occasionally. I mean you've been lovers for more than one year now and you obviously trust each other in every way. After being a couple for such a long time there surely must be some things you'd like to try in bed. Everybody has sexual phantasies little cousin." "To be honest, Gii and I have never spoken about this kind of stuff," Takumi admitted, smiling weakly. He was surprised at himself that he could talk so openly about such a personal topic and somehow it felt strangely relieving.

"Maybe it's because the one I'm talking to is Mamoru," he whispered inaudibly. Ever since his childhood days he had always been able to speak with his older cousin about anything openly and comfortably, no matter what the subject had been. "Maybe you should discuss those things some time," Mamoru suggested. "You are lovers after all and if you find the right moment it shouldn't be a problem to talk about the phantasies and desires the two of you have in a comfortable way." "But it's so embarrassing," Takumi exclaimed. "I don't think I could ever start a conversation like that with Gii, even if I wished to." With that he cast his eyes again and sighed deeply. "If you're too shy and embarrassed to discuss that subject with your boyfriend, you could always just go for it," the brown-haired boy offered, squeezing his cousin's shoulder reassuringly. "Don't be afraid to take the initiative from time to time and to show Saki-kun what you'd like to do. I think he'll definitely appreciate it and enjoy seeing this side of you. From what you've told me about him, I guess he wouldn't mind to be more adventurous in bed as long as you let him know that you are ready for it and where the boundaries are."

"How come that you can talk so comfortably about such a personal subject," Takumi asked in astonishment. "Blame it on the fact that I passed my teenage years in France," Mamoru replied chuckling. "Western society is generally more open about sexuality and things related to it." "I see," the younger boy said, smiling warmly. "Thank you Mamoru. You were right, today was the first time I ever had the chance to talk to anyone about my intimate private life. I guess that's one of those subjects a son would usually discuss with his father or an older brother…" his voice trailed off and for a short moment a sad, pained expression appeared on his soft features.

"Can I ask you something else," the brown-haired university student asked carefully when he noticed the sudden change of his cousin's mood. Takumi remained silent but nodded slowly, almost imperceptibly. He had an inkling where this conversation was going and he dreaded the subject more than anything. "There are a few things that have been bothering me for quite a while now," Mamoru explained. "The relationship between you and your parents is pretty bad, isn't it? When I paid them a visit last week and asked about you they became strangely quiet. Finally they hesitantly told me that they've rarely contacted you since you've become a student at Shidou, but they didn't want to tell me why." He fell silent and looked at his younger cousin with expectant eyes, but Takumi quickly averted his gaze, shifting uncomfortably.

"This issue is somehow related to Naoto, am I right," the older boy asked bluntly. Again Takumi didn't answer, but the pained sigh that escaped his lips proved Mamoru right. "Then there's this extreme change of your personality," he continued. "At Naoto's funeral you were already strangely distant and withdrawn, but I attributed it to the fact that you were mourning for your brother. However, about two years ago my father had some business in Japan and took the opportunity to visit his brother. From your dad he heard that you had developed some kind of phobia, that you had become scared of physical contact. But even my father couldn't get any information as for the reasons of your illness. When I learned about your condition I was shocked to say the least and worried sick about you. Your letters gradually became fewer and fewer and whenever I asked you something about that subject in the replies I wrote, you always avoided to give me a clear answer."

Mamoru fell silent for a moment and took a deep breath before he continued, his eyes never leaving Takumi's features. "To be honest, you were the main reason why I wanted to come back to Japan. Of course I wanted to visit you because I missed you, but I also wanted to make sure that you are alright and try to get to the bottom of all this. God, Takumi, what on earth happened to you?" "Mamoru…I'm…I'm sorry…I," the ebony-haired boy stammered, wringing his hands in desperation. "Look at me," Takumi's cousin ordered softly and placed his hand gently under the younger boy's chin, forcing him to raise his head. His beautiful dark eyes were clouded with sorrow and pain and he looked ready to cry. "You know you can tell me anything that troubles you," Mamoru whispered, "that I'm always there for you." He was answered with a small, almost imperceptible nod.

"Would you like to sit on my knees," the young man continued casually, trying to somewhat lighten his cousin's mood. "You always used to do that as a child when you wanted to talk to me about personal, emotional topics or anything you found difficult to speak comfortably about." A tiny smile formed on Takumi's lips upon hearing those words. "I remember that," he replied softly. "You always listened patiently to me, no matter how long I talked. But don't you think I've become a little too old to sit on your knees?" "As long as it helps you to open up to me it's okay I guess," the older boy mused. "But I'm in earnest little cousin, talk to me. Trust me and confide in me like you used to do and tell me what happened." A grave silence settled between the two boys and Mamoru gently placed his arm around Takumi's shoulders, pulling him closer, waiting patiently.

"Nobody, except for my parents and Gii, knows the reason for my fear of physical contact. I've never told anyone," Takumi began hesitantly and sighed deeply, closing his eyes for a brief moment before he continued. "Onii-san is the reason for my 'Human Contact Phobia'." "Naoto," Mamoru asked, taken aback. "What on earth happened between the two of you that would result in such an extreme reaction like the development of a phobia on your side?" The younger boy took a deep breath as he snuggled closer to his cousin for support. He then told him everything about the sexual abuse he had suffered by the hands of his older brother, the reaction of his parents when they finally found out, the false accusations that had turned him from the victim into the culprit and the consequences that had changed his life forever.

"Once our parents knew, life at home became unbearable. They never cared much about me to begin with, but after they had found out they completely turned their backs on me, especially mother. I could see the disgust and disdain in her eyes whenever she looked at me, although she tried to hide it. I was abandoned without ever being given the chance to explain myself. When the truth finally came out after Naoto's admittance to the mental hospital the rift between them and me had already become insupportable, the wounds of my heart being too deep to forgive them," Takumi explained in pained, distant voice, his dark-brown eyes brimming with unshed tears. One year ago he had been able to tell Gii about his past without shedding a tear, then why was telling the same story to Mamoru affecting him so much? "What remained after that were days spent by myself in the solitude of my room because I tried to avoid my parents and on the few occasions we got to talk our conversations were always tensed and awkward," he continued with a sad sigh.

"We had become strangers to each other. In the end I decided to take my high school entrance exam at Shidou because I wanted to escape from home. By that time I had already become a social outcast, scared of being touched, indifferent to anybody and anything in order to protect my heart from getting hurt again. If it hadn't been for Gii, I would…" his voice broke and tears began to wet his cheeks. "Oh Takumi, I had no idea," Mamoru whispered, his own eyes starting to cloud over. Not trusting his voice he simply pulled his younger cousin onto his knees and embraced him tightly. The ebony-haired boy buried his face into Mamoru's shoulder, holding him equally tight and for the next few minutes the two cousins just remained quietly in each other's arms, in an embrace that was both comforting and healing. "Thank you for telling me," Mamoru finally broke the silence and placed a loving kiss on Takumi's forehead which caused the boy to smile mildly. "You always did that in order to encourage and comfort me when I was a child." "Well, old habits die hard, I guess," the young man replied, chuckling lightly and the grave atmosphere lightened instantly as they shared another brotherly hug.

oOo

Around 2pm Takumi made his way to Gii's room, his cheeks flushed with excitement. He was looking forward to their private meeting and his heart felt light. He had come to understand that talking to his boyfriend about the past with Naoto was one thing, but finally having been able to confide in a close family member after all those years was a completely different matter and had been incredibly liberating. Smiling contently to himself he knocked on the door of room 300 and entered as soon as Gii had invited him inside. "Good afternoon, how did the meeting go," Takumi greeted cheerfully as he crossed the room to hug his boyfriend affectionately. When the other boy didn't show any reaction at all he pulled away reluctantly.

"Gii," he asked carefully, surprise and confusion written all over his features when he looked up to meet his lover's gaze. The expression on the handsome upper-class man's face was indifferent and unreadable, his hazel-colored eyes cold and narrowed dangerously. "What is it," Takumi asked hesitantly when he noticed that look. "Did something happen at the meeting? Are you troubled by something?" "It's nothing. I'm alright," Gii replied coldly and turned away from his boyfriend. "You're most definitely not alright," the ebony-haired boy exclaimed. "You clearly have something on your mind. Do you want to talk about it?" 'Obviously not,' he thought when there was no reply and he sighed dejectedly. That was not how he had imagined their private meeting to be, especially since it had been quite a while since his last visit to Gii's room.

"If you prefer to be alone or to rest I can return to my room and we can meet when you're feeling better," he offered softly, his voice laced with concern. "Wouldn't you prefer to do that anyway, so that you can spend more time with your precious cousin," Gii finally snapped, turning around to face the other boy again, his eyes blazing with anger. "Wouldn't you rather be with him right now than being here with me anyway?" "Ehh!" Takumi exclaimed in surprise, clearly taken aback by his lover's harsh words and the cold, accusing tone of his voice. "N-No," he stammered, shifting in discomfort under Gii's piercing gaze. "W-What makes you say such a thing," he asked and gently placed a hand on the taller boy's shoulder, but was brushed off immediately. "You're not yourself recently…those sudden mood swings…what's wrong? You've been acting totally strange these past two days!"

"How on earth am I supposed to act when you are all lovey-dovey with that cousin of yours whenever the two of you meet," Gii roared. "I've seen you at the gazebo on my way back from the meeting this morning, you sitting on his lap while you held each other tight!" For a moment Takumi could only stare at his boyfriend in silence, blinking rapidly a few times as realization suddenly hit him like a brick wall. "Moshikashite…Gii, are you jealous over my cousin," he asked carefully. "Of course I am," the amber-haired boy almost shouted. "How could I not be, considering your behavior around him." "There's no reason to be jealous, believe me," Takumi explained quietly. "There's nothing between Mamoru and me. We're cousins, very close cousins, but that's all."

Gii shook his head in denial at his lover's words and clenched his fists. "I'm not blind Takumi," he huffed, gradually raising his voice. "Ever since his arrival that guy has been all over you, constantly hugging and touching you. You might have been close cousins in the past, but now he definitely sees much more in you than just his little cousin, for all you say!" "Don't be ridiculous, Gii," the ebony-haired boy said forcefully. "It might be true that there is a lot of physical contact between us, but Mamoru's feelings for me are not of the nature you think!" "I simply can't believe that," the handsome upper-class man exclaimed stubbornly. "I've seen the way he looks at you and don't think I haven't noticed the way you look at him!"

"Oh really, have you," Takumi replied, subconsciously raising his voice as he felt himself getting angrier by the minute. He was flattered by Gii's jealousy because it showed how much his boyfriend loved him and cared for him, but that was going too far. Why had Gii to insist so stubbornly on Mamoru having feelings for him that went beyond love between cousins and to blow the matter up into something it clearly wasn't. "If you have noticed anything then please enlighten me," he huffed. "How do I look at my cousin?" "The same way I look at you," Gii roared, his voice a mix of anger and frustration. "With adoration and love!"

"That's because I do love him," Takumi screamed back, his shoulders trembling from the effort to fight back the tears that began to cloud his vision and to keep his emotions under control as best as he could in the current situation. "Mamoru is the only family I have left. From my closest relatives he's the only one who hasn't turned his back on me, the only one who ever cared! He's like the older brother I've always wanted, but never had! I thought that you of all people would understand how I feel, but it seems that I was mistaken!" A grave silence settled between the two boys and Gii could only stare in surprise and shock at his boyfriend, who was breathing heavily. Before he could say anything Takumi had turned on his heels and headed for the door. "Takumi wait," the handsome upper-class man exclaimed in desperation.

"No Gii, this conversation is over," the ebony-haired boy hissed. "You're not yourself right now. If you really want to discuss this matter with me in an objective, rational manner you should come to your senses and cool your head first!" With that he left the room, slamming the door shut behind him so hard that the sound caused Gii to wince. Once outside the tears Takumi had been holding back up until that moment finally started to flow freely down his cheeks. "Gii why do you have to be such a stubborn baka sometimes," he sniffed as he quickly headed towards his room, hoping that he wouldn't run into any of his friends because he really didn't feel like explaining himself to anyone. All he wanted was to be alone for some time to calm his troubled and heavy heart. Inside his room Gii stared motionlessly at the door for several minutes, the realization that he had allowed his jealousy to get the better of him and that it had caused him to lose control slowly sinking in. Takumi's words had stung and as they kept ringing in his ears, the amber-haired boy came to understand that he had hurt Takumi deeply with his unreasonable behavior.

oOo

When Mamoru met Takumi for dinner that night he noticed instantly that his younger cousin was in a somber mood. The ebony-haired boy was very quiet throughout dinner, hardly ate a thing and his beautiful eyes reflected sadness and pain. Determined to get to the bottom of the matter the young man decided to take the boy for an evening walk later, in hopes to get him to talk. After they had finished their meal Mamoru led Takumi to the small, quiet park in the center of the town.

"What's eating you," he asked gently as they slowly walked the narrow, graveled paths. "Why are you so gloomy?" "It's Gii," the younger boy answered dejectedly. "This afternoon he and I…we…," his voice trailed off and fresh tears welled up in his eyes as he recalled the incident in his lover's room. "Did you have a fight," Mamoru inquired softly. When Takumi nodded almost imperceptibly and broke into sobs the older boy draped his arm comfortingly around his cousin's shoulders. "Do you want to tell me what happened?" Nodding again Takumi took in a shaky breath and told Mamoru everything that had happened between Gii and him during their meeting that afternoon.

oOo

Sunday morning came much too early for Takumi's liking and he woke up with a heavy heart. The thought that he would have to say goodbye to his beloved cousin later that morning made him incredibly sad and the fact that he hadn't heard anything from Gii since their fight the day before didn't do much to improve his mood. He felt downright miserable. Sighing dejectedly he dragged himself out of bed and got dressed. He was just about to leave the room when his cell phone went off, informing him that he had received a new message. It was from Mamoru saying that he was waiting for him at the cafeteria to have breakfast together. The idea of getting to spend a little more time with his cousin before his departure brought a tiny smile to Takumi's gloomy face as he hurried down the stairs of his dorm.

When he arrived at the cafeteria Mamoru greeted him with a warm, brotherly hug. "I hope you haven't been waiting long," Takumi asked as they made their way over to the counter. The older boy shook his head, smiling mildly and once they had received their chosen breakfast sets the two cousins sat down at a quiet table in the corner of the room. They chatted animatedly about random things, neither of them willing to spoil that last meeting by bringing up any sad or depressing subject.

Time flew by fast and at last the inevitable moment had arrived. "I should get going," Mamoru said quietly and Takumi nodded silently, a sad sigh escaping his lips. Once outside the cafeteria, the brown-haired boy pulled his younger cousin into a tight, loving embrace and Takumi buried his face in the crook of Mamoru's neck. "Take care little cousin," the young man said hoarsely, gently ruffling the younger boy's hair. "We might be living in different countries, but I'll always be there for you. No matter what troubles you, don't hesitate to turn to me when you need help, comfort and advice. Will you promise me that?"

Takumi raised his head to meet Mamoru's gaze and nodded, a lone tear trickling down his cheek. "I promise and let's write to each other more often again and talk on the phone sometimes," he said in a shaky voice, smiling bravely. "We have a deal then," the older boy replied reassuringly as he gently brushed away the tear with his thumb. He then pulled away from the embrace and cupped Takumi's delicate face. "Until our next meeting, little cousin," he said softly and placed one last loving kiss on the boy's forehead before he turned to leave. "Until our next meeting," Takumi whispered, fresh tears veiling his eyes as he stared after the retreating figure of his cousin until he was out of sight.

oOo

In front of the main building Gii was talking with some other students when he noticed a vaguely familiar figure walking in the direction of the school gates. The other boy had obviously noticed him as well because fixing his gaze upon him he came over. "Ohayo minna," he greeted the group politely. "Saki-kun, could you spare me a moment of your time?" "Sure Mamoru-san," Gii replied equally polite and excused himself from the conversation with the other boys.

Sighing internally he braced himself for a reprimand he was sure about to hear, concerning his behavior towards Takumi the day before. He deserved to be scolded for sure, but he didn't need to hear those words from the person who had caused him to lose his self-control in the first place. "Well, Saki-kun," Takumi's cousin began. "I'm glad that I ran into you before taking my leave because I really wanted to express my gratitude to you."

"Excuse me," Gii asked, raising his eyebrows in surprise. He clearly hadn't expected those kinds of words from the older boy. "I'd like to thank you," Mamoru repeated, smiling mildly. "I'd like to thank you for curing my cousin's phobia with your love, for bringing back the light in his eyes and for making him laugh and smile again." "Ano…you…you're welcome," Gii, who was usually quite eloquent, stammered clumsily. "Takumi holds a very special place in my heart, you know. I fell in love with him long before we came to Shidou. I first met him at a violin concert he and my childhood friend Sachi Inoue participated in and it was there that he stole my heart."

"I see," the brown-haired boy replied. "He is very lucky to have someone like you in his life." Gii blushed slightly in embarrassment and a brief moment of silence settled between the two young men. "Has Takumi told you about the fight we had yesterday afternoon," the amber-haired student picked the conversation up again. "He has," Mamoru confirmed quietly. "He was pretty cast down and I can't help but feel that I'm partly to blame for it." "Ehh," Gii exclaimed, unable to believe his ears and his eyes grew wide. "You see, Takumi and I have always been very close in every aspect, including the physical one" the older boy explained. "I didn't mean any harm with my actions and I'm really sorry if they have caused you to think that I see more in him than a cousin."

"Thanks for your reassurance," Gii replied, smiling weakly. "But that we ended up fighting was mainly my fault. If I had believed Takumi when he said that the relationship between the two of you is not of a romantic nature, it wouldn't have happened." "I'm sure all will be well once you have talked things over with him," Mamoru stated, patting Gii's shoulder comfortingly. "I hope so," the younger boy said softly. "But there is one thing I'd like to ask if you don't mind." "What is it, Saki-kun," Takumi's cousin asked calmly.

"I understand that you and Takumi obviously mean a lot to each other," Gii began hesitantly. "But has your relationship always included that much physical contact? It's quite unusual for two guys who are not romantically involved." "Yes, we've always been like that," the older boy answered truthfully. "And there's a reason. What do you know about my cousin's relationship with his family?" "Well, I know that Takumi's parents practically didn't care about him and that they had all their attention on his older brother Naoto," Gii replied a little confused. "It wasn't just his parents, Saki-kun. It was pretty much the same with any other close relatives, including my parents," Mamoru explained, his voice laced with sadness. "As a child Takumi wasn't very good at expressing himself and kept many things to himself."

"He still does it sometimes, even when he's with me," the amber-haired-boy commented quietly. "That's what I thought," Takumi's cousin sighed. "Because of his lack of eloquence and the fact that his brother was pretty good at everything he did, despite his delicate health, Takumi was ignored by almost everybody in the family. The only ones who took notice of him were me and Naoto, at least until he…," Mamoru's voice trailed off and a pained sigh escaped his lips. "What made you care for him," Gii asked softly, looking genuinely pained as he recalled his lover's words from their fight which suddenly made perfect sense to him. 'Mamoru is the only family I have left! From my closest relatives he's the only one who hasn't turned his back on me, the only one who ever cared!'

"I don't have any brothers or sisters," the older boy explained. "Since my and Takumi's father are brothers our families were close and we often met. I don't know why, but even though Naoto and I were the same age, I always felt closer to Takumi for some reason, despite our age difference. I've always seen him more like a younger brother than a cousin I guess. He loved and trusted me, confided in me and right from the start our relationship included a lot of physical contact. From me he got those loving hugs and affectionate caresses he so rarely received from his own parents. That's probably the reason why Takumi is still so comfortable with me touching him, even after all those years and the terrible things that have happened to him."

"When did he tell you about the sexual abuse he suffered by Naoto's hands," Gii asked weakly. "He told me yesterday morning when we were talking in the gazebo near the greenhouse," Mamoru answered with a sigh, casting his eyes. "I was shocked. At Naoto's funeral, where I last met Takumi, I already noticed that something wasn't right, but naïve as I was, I thought he was simply grieving for the loss of his brother. I never expected sexual abuse to be the reason for Takumi's change of personality. He never told me anything…"

"Probably for the same reason he didn't want to tell me," Gii mused and met Mamoru's surprised gaze. "After I had confessed my feelings to Takumi I tried to find out what had caused his 'Human Contact Phobia', but he always avoided that subject. When he finally told me I asked him why he had kept something so serious from me. And you know what he said? He said that he was scared that I would be disgusted with him once I got to know about his past and that I would leave him. You are the only one in Takumi's family who cares for him, who makes him feel loved. I guess he was afraid that you would turn your back on him as well, if he told you what Naoto did to him."

"That boy," Mamoru muttered, shaking his head. "It's just like him to think and act in such a way, but luckily everything is alright now. As long as Takumi has you and me by his side he'll be fine. Please take good care of him, Saki-kun." "I will, definitely and please call me Gii," the amber-haired boy replied. "I think I should thank you as well Mamoru-san. Thanks to your frankness I've learned some new interesting facts about Takumi's past, things he, most likely, wouldn't have told me out of his own free will since he hates talking about his childhood." "You're welcome and calling me Mamoru is just fine," the older boy stated, smiling warmly. "Let's keep in contact from now on. Please don't hesitate to call or email me whenever you need something." "Will do," Gii replied, returning the smile as Mamoru handed him his calling card. Before parting ways the two boys firmly shook hands and gave each other a friendly hug that marked the beginning of a friendship between them. "Alright, one problem solved and one more to go," Gii sighed and took his cell phone to finally make the call that had been long overdue.

oOo

The atmosphere in room 300 was so heavy one could have cut it with a knife. Even though Gii had offered Takumi to sit beside him on the sofa, the ebony-haired boy had chosen one of the armchairs instead and an awkward silence had fallen between the lovers. "You've been crying," Gii stated the obvious, his gaze fixed on Takumi's face that held the expression he hated the most, a look of cold indifference he had worn so many times before they had become roommates and lovers. "Because of your cousin's departure," he asked gently. "Why would you care," Takumi huffed. "Aren't you glad that Mamoru is gone, that we can't meet anymore and that from now on you're going to have me all to yourself again?" The handsome upper-class man winced at his lover's harsh words, but he couldn't blame him. Thanks to his earlier conversation with Mamoru he had come to understand the importance of that man's existence in Takumi's life, the depth and complexity of their relationship and he had realized how deeply he had hurt the boy with his actions and words on the previous day.

"Your cousin and I ran into each other just before he left and we talked for some time," Gii continued, ignoring his boyfriend's backbiting comment and rose from the sofa to walk over to him. "He's actually a very nice guy who cares as much for you as you do for him." That remark caught Takumi's attention and the cold expression on his face was replaced with one of surprise. "I'm really sorry, Takumi," the amber-haired boy said truthfully. "Please forgive me that I have been such a stubborn, brick-headed and inconsiderate baka. I was truly jealous over Mamoru and I allowed my jealousy to rule me and to cloud my judgment. I should have believed your words and I know that I've hurt with my irrational behavior." He fell silent for a moment, as if contemplating how to continue, his eyes never leaving Takumi's who was staring blankly back at him.

What the handsome upper-class man did next Takumi could have never imagined and it took him completely off guard. "Takumi, ore wa honto ni gomenasai desu," Gii said hoarsely, bowing low to his beloved. "Please forgive me." "G-Gii," the ebony-haired boy stammered totally perplexed, blinking his eyes several times in sheer disbelief, not sure how to react. "Please Gii, raise your head," he said shakily and rose to his feet, his anger melting away instantly. "Look at me!" The handsome upper-class man did as he was told and slowly lifted his head to face his lover whose features held an unreadable expression. For several long moments the two boys looked at each other in silence and Takumi could see the sincerity in Gii's hazel-colored eyes, as well as the insecurity and anxiety. He could only guess how mortifying it must have been for his lover to go that far and do what he just had done.

Afraid that his own voice would betray him, he quietly closed the distance between himself and the other boy and reached up to tenderly cup his boyfriend's face with both hands before placing a loving, lingering kiss on his lips, a kiss that said more than a thousand words. Once he had pulled away he wrapped his arms around Gii's middle and buried his face in the taller boy's shoulder. With a sigh of relief Gii embraced Takumi tightly and for the next few minutes the two lovers remained silently in each other's arms, holding tight, neither of them willing to let go. "I was quite surprised at you," the ebony-haired boy finally spoke into the now comfortable quiescence of the room. "I never thought that you could get jealous to the point of losing your self-control." "Would you believe me if I told you that I had no idea that I could either," Gii replied and pressed his lips gently onto Takumi's soft hair. "But boy I was and I was scared."

"Scared," Takumi repeated surprised and raised his head to meet his boyfriend's gaze. "Yes," the amber-haired boy explained. "I was scared that I would lose you. I've never seen you being so at ease and physically comfortable with anyone other than me. I was afraid that you would be swayed by Mamoru because of the strong bonds between the two of you and that he would steal you away from me. After all, he is a very handsome and charming young man." "He most definitely is, all Hayama boys are, you know. It's a family trade," Takumi chuckled before he became serious again. "I love Mamoru in my own special way, but no one could ever take the place you have in my heart. I love you Gii and only you. You're my one and only and that will never change."

"My sweet Takumi," Gii whispered deeply moved and kissed his boyfriend lovingly. "But I think you owe me an apology as well," he declared matter-of-factly after breaking the kiss and couldn't help but smile at the confused look on the other boy's face. "The last two days I really felt ignored and neglected," he explained, feigning hurt. "And that after we hadn't been able to meet in private for almost two weeks! You know how weak my self-restraint is." "I see," Takumi replied, smiling apologetically. "Then let me make immediate amends for having been such a neglectful boyfriend." With that he reached up to grasp Gii's glasses and smiling seductively he gently pulled them off, his cousin's advice ringing in his ears. 'Don't be afraid to take the initiative from time to time and to show Saki-kun what you'd like to do.'

"Takumi…," was all the handsome upper-class man could say before his lips were sealed with a loving, sensual kiss. It took him a moment to recover from his astonishment, but then he responded eagerly, pulling the other boy close again. When he felt Takumi's tongue brushing over his bottom lip in a playful, teasing manner, a surprised gasp escaped him and the ebony-haired boy took that chance to deepen the kiss. He began to explore the warm, moist cavern of Gii's mouth with an ardent passion that caused the amber-haired boy to moan softly in pleasure as their tongues met, swirling sensually around each other. Completely overwhelmed by his lover's forwardness Gii could only surrender to Takumi's highly seductive actions and follow his lead. When they finally broke the kiss, after several long moments, both boys' breaths were ragged, their chests heaving. They locked gazes and stimulated by his lover's invasive kiss, Gii's eyes had darkened with desire.

"Wow…Takumi…," he stammered hoarsely. "Gii," the ebony-haired boy purred velvet-like as he gently his fingers over his boyfriend's flushed cheeks, clearly enjoying the other's reactions to his seductive advances. A captivating smile caressed his lips and he leaned in to take Gii's mouth captive once more. The kiss they shared was long, deep and of a searing fervidness. A sultry purr escaped the handsome upper-class man's lips when he felt Takumi's tongue brushing caressingly against his own. "Unngh!" After what seemed an eternity, Takumi pulled away at last, allowing his lover and himself to catch their breaths. "T-Takumi, you…what…," Gii breathed dazedly, only to be silenced, the other boy's finger gently pressing against his lips. "I told you Gii, I'm making amends for having been such a neglectful boyfriend recently," the ebony-haired boy whispered seductively as he leaned in once more for another heated and lustful kiss.

The handsome upper-class man quickly lost himself in the mesmerizing sensation of his beloved's kisses and his brain began to fizzle out. He barely registered that Takumi maneuvered him slowly over to the bed, breaking their ardent kisses only long enough to allow their lungs to be filled with the much needed oxygen. When Gii felt the edge of his bed digging into the hollows of his knees he lowered himself to sit on the mattress, pulling his lover down with him. Takumi released Gii's lips for a moment and straddled his lap with a sultry smile. As their eyes met he could see the love, the longing and the desire in his boyfriend's hazel-colored orbs. He slowly traced Gii's quivering bottom lip with his thumb, letting the other hand roam over the boy's shoulder and settle at the nape of his neck. Gii closed his eyes and drew in a shaky breath, his body surrendering implicitly to Takumi's sensual caresses.

The ebony-haired boy began to trail feathery kisses along his partner's jaw, all the way up to his ear. While he let his hands move over the other's broad shoulders or toy with the hair at the base of his neck, he playfully licked, sucked and nibbled at his earlobe. The handsome upper-class man moaned softly as he felt delicious tingles running up and down his spine, heat spreading slowly inside his body as proof of his heightening desire. "A-Ah." He had never seen such an erotic, seductive Takumi before and he had to admit that he liked that side of his lover a great deal, not to mention that it really turned him on. The ebony-haired boy continued his actions and with another moan Gii buried his head in the curve of Takumi's neck, tightening his embrace as waves of pleasure washed over him. "Ngh…Gii," Takumi sighed breathy, when the other boy began to nuzzle his neck tenderly.

The moment he felt his lover's lips brushing lightly over his skin in a loving caress the ebony-haired boy instinctively tilted his head to give the other as much access as possible, his body already reacting to the sensitive stimulation. After he had placed several languorous kisses on Takumi's neck Gii leaned back a little to meet his beloved's eyes. "You little minx," he whispered huskily as he outlined the contours of the boy's beautiful and delicate features before he slowly traced his fingers down the other's throat until he reached the collar of his shirt where he let them ghost over the smooth fabric. He was about to undo the first button when Takumi gently grabbed his wrists, intercepting his hands. "No, Gii. Not this time," he purred and the amber-haired boy blinked in surprise as a feeling of déja-vu overcame him.

Still trying to convince himself in his dazed mind that he wasn't dreaming this time, Gii felt his hands being guided down to his sides where they were trapped beneath his lover's. With a seductive smile playing about his mouth Takumi sealed the other's lips with another deep, passionate and demanding kiss, leaving the boy no choice but to surrender to his stimulating touches and caresses. As their tongues came together for a heated dance, he released Gii's hands and the handsome upper-class man couldn't help but sigh in pleasure as he felt his lover slowly unbuttoning his shirt. He placed his arms around Takumi's middle in return and let his fingers roam up and down the boy's back, the need and desire to touch the object of his affection more intimately starting to cloud his senses.

"Takumi," he sighed softly as the ebony-haired boy slowly kissed and licked his way down to the curve of his neck. Smiling mildly said boy gently brushed the shirt off his boyfriend's shoulders and began to nip, suck and bite the sensitive skin, coaxing sweet sounds of pleasure out of the other, driving him crazy with lust and desire. He continued his highly seductive actions and when he felt Gii shudder under his ministrations he tenderly gripped and pulled his lover's silky, amber-colored strands, forcing him to arch the neck and to expose more of the soft, yielding flesh to his mercy. He lapped playfully at the heated skin before he took it gently between his teeth. The handsome upper-class man gasped in surprise and cried out only a moment later in a mix of pleasure and pain as Takumi sunk his teeth deep into the sensitive skin. "A-Ahh!"

The ebony-haired boy let go of the assaulted flesh, trailed his tongue sensually over the mark that had begun forming and slowly kissed his way back up to Gii's mouth. For a brief moment their eyes met and smiling affectionately Takumi claimed his lover's lips once more. Gii responded eagerly, his hands roaming over the other's body on their own accord as they shared a long, deep and erotic kiss, a kiss that spoke of longing, lust and burning desire. Without pulling away from his partner's lips Takumi leaned forward and shifting, he pushed Gii gently but determinedly down onto the mattress, using his weight to pin the boy down underneath him. Moaning softly against his beloved's mouth the handsome upper-class man sneaked his hands swiftly under Takumi's shirt where he began to caress the soft, warm, flesh.

Relishing the feeling of Gii's intimate, caressing touches that made his skin crawl and prickle, the ebony-haired boy broke the kiss with a sweet sigh of pleasure to meet his lover's passion-glazed eyes that were reflecting a beguiling mix of love and raging lust. "Gii," he sighed breathy and rubbed his nose gingerly against his partner's before he rose into a sitting position, straddling his middle. Gii's hands traveled slowly from Takumi's back over well memorized paths to his stomach and finally slipped out of his shirt to trace the button tap until they had reached the top button. With skilled fingers the handsome upper-class man unfastened the first two, only to be stopped as he was about to work on the third. Takumi had gripped Gii's wrists again and shaking his head softly he pushed his lover's arms down on the left and right beside the pillow.

"Leave your hands where they are," he purred with a sultry smile and Gii could only nod in return, too amazed for words at his partner's forwardness. The ebony-haired boy released the other's wrists from his hold and began ever so slowly to unfasten the remaining buttons of his shirt, well aware that every single one of his movements was followed by hungry eyes and he clearly enjoyed the fact that he could have so much power over his lover. He tenderly placed his hands on Gii's chest and rolled his shoulders a few times, causing the shirt to slip down and to expose his lean, flawless body. "God, you look so tempting," the amber-haired boy groaned. "So do you," Takumi whispered softly and began to trace his fingers tenderly over the other's bare chest, brushing them repeatedly over his nipples in feathery but highly stimulating caresses. Gii's breath quickened and he writhed in pleasure every time his lover's finger circled his areola or the hardening nubs. "Ngh…"

Encouraged by the reactions he got Takumi bent down to trail a series of burning, lingering kisses from the other's throat, over his shoulders and collar bones down to his chest. When he felt his boyfriend's tongue flicking teasingly over his now hard and sensitive nipples Gii couldn't help but moan, clutching the edges of the pillow tightly for support as the ebony-haired boy went on with his sweet, sensual torture. He let his tongue swirl several times around the nubs before he took one into his mouth to suckle on it while his fingers played with the other one, driving his lover insane with lust and pleasure. Each time he was caressed by the other boy it felt like electric impulses shooting up his spine, setting his whole body on fire and he gasped out repeatedly. "Ta…ngh…Takumi…aah…!"

After he had given the first nipple one last teasing lick, Takumi kissed his way over to the other one, his right hand slowly traveling south at the same time. With a moan the handsome upper-class man arched into the ministrations of his beloved, who skillfully unbuckled the belt of the other's pants and undid them, all the while continuing his stimulating and ardent caresses. "Gii," he whispered endearingly and brushed his lips over his partner's collar bones and throat back up to his mouth to take it captive again. As the lovers shared another lustful kiss the ebony-haired boy slipped his hand into Gii's underwear, stroking and caressing tenderly. "Ta…kumi," Gii sighed against his boyfriend's lips, his chest heaving with wanton pants.

"Does it feel good," Takumi asked velvet-like without refraining from his arousing cajoling. When he was answered with another raw moan of pleasure he pulled down the other boy's pants and boxers to discard them carelessly beside the bed before stripping out of his own jeans and undies. Once his clothes had joined the others on the floor he resumed his erotic actions. He placed heated, feathery kisses over Gii's chest, ever so slowly moving his lips down the boy's abdomen, lapping here and there at the smooth skin in a playful and teasing way, his fingers ghosting along the other's hardening member. "Oh…please," Gii begged with a lustful sigh and squirmed in anticipation, unable to conceal his need and desire any longer.

Takumi obliged and the amber-haired boy moaned loudly as he felt his lover's tongue licking the length of his erection. Takumi repeated his action and without hesitation he took Gii's hardened shaft into his mouth, engulfing the other boy in heat. He skillfully moved his lips several times from the root to the tip, then swirled his tongue around the head and pushed it into the slit. Gii's head snapped back and his fingers dug deeper into the pillow as a wave of heat and pleasure washed over him and he cried out, his mind going blank. "Ngh…ahhh!" The ebony-haired boy continued his ministrations and sucked harder, enjoying the reactions he got from his lover in return. "T-Takumi…please," Gii managed to gasp. "If you…continue like that…I'm…ngh…I'm not going to last. I…I want…"

"What do you want? Tell me," Takumi whispered velvet-like and flicked his tongue teasingly over the head of the other's erect member. "I…I want to feel you…inside of me," the handsome upper-class moaned without thinking, his mind too clouded with lust to register anything but his own desires and the pleasure his boyfriend was giving him. "G-Gii," the other boy gasped and halted his caresses momentarily to meet his lover's passion-glazed eyes. "Takumi…I'm sor…," Gii began to stammer dazedly, thinking that he had overstepped a boundary, only to be silenced in mid-sentence as the other boy's lips descended swiftly onto his own. "Are you sure that you really want this," Takumi asked huskily, his voice heavily laden with lust. The handsome upper-class man nodded weakly. "Let me feel your way," he breathed hoarsely. "Even if it's just once."

"Well then," the ebony-haired boy whispered and picked up where he had left off only moments ago. He gently closed his fingers around his lover's length, stroking it evenly as he reached over to the nightstand with his free hand. He knew that Gii kept a bottle of lube in its small drawer, though they were rarely using it these days, since his body had quickly become accustomed to Gii's actions during their usual lovemaking. When another sigh of pleasure escaped the amber-haired boy's lips, Takumi moved his mouth over Gii's abdomen to his inner thighs where he licked, kissed and nipped the sensitive skin before lubricating his fingers. "Relax Gii," he purred as he began to caress his lover's entrance, but did not enter. "I don't want this to be painful for you."

The said boy moaned softly at the new, foreign sensation that felt strangely good and his eyes drifted shut. Takumi leaned in and trailed sweet, sensual kisses all over his lover's upper body, circling his entrance enticingly at the same time. On instinct Gii pressed his hips down, letting out a strangled cry as Takumi's wet finger entered him gently. The ebony-haired boy moved the digit carefully and slowly inside the other's passage, trying to make the process of stretching the tight muscles as painless as possible for him. He continued his movements for several moments and licking Gii's nipples playfully he inserted a second finger. The handsome upper-class man whimpered and bit down on his lip, a slightly pained expression dancing on his features at the feeling of his lover's fingers moving in and out of him. But as soon as Takumi brushed them against Gii's prostate those whimpers quickly turned into soft moans of pleasure. "Ah…ngh…"

"I think I've found your sweet spot," he breathed seductively and pulled out his digits only to push them back in a little harder, aiming for the same spot and Gii cried out again. "Correction," the ebony-haired boy smirked. "I've definitely found it." With that he inserted another finger and wrapped his free hand around his lover's erection once more, moving it rhythmically from the base to the head as he continued to thrust into the boy, rubbing his insides and stretching him as best as he could. When he finally pulled out a sultry purr leaked out from between Gii's lips and his entrance quivered.

Knowing that his lover was ready Takumi coated himself with lube and meeting Gii's eyes he entered him, slowly pressing inwards, deeper and deeper, causing the other boy to half moan half scream in a foreign mix of pleasure and pain. Once he was fully sheathed he leaned in to place a loving kiss on his beloved's mouth. "Are you alright Gii," he asked tenderly and refrained from moving, giving the other all the time he needed to adjust to him. When the amber-haired boy finally nodded, Takumi began to roll his hips slowly, thrusting gently into Gii's passage. Gii soon matched Takumi's rhythm and moaning he grabbed his lover's shoulders, pressing his legs tightly against the other's sides. He could feel Takumi shifting inside of him and the next moment he cried out as his lover's member hit his prostate.

He threw his head back into the pillow, a pleasure he had never known so far surging through his body, overwhelming his senses when he felt Takumi brushing against the same spot over and over again, causing him to gasp out every time. "Oh…please…ngh…there…ah…!" The ebony-haired boy gradually sped up his movements, thrusting harder and deeper into Gii's passage, making sure to lavish attention on his sweet, most sensitive spot. The handsome upper-class man tightened his grip around Takumi's shoulders, his nails digging deep into the soft, yielding flesh as heat and pleasure shot through him like jolts of electricity, driving him steadily closer to the edge. Every time his lover thrust into his passage, he trembled internally. "Ahh…yes…ngh…!"

Sensing that Gii was about to reach his peak Takumi closed his hand around the other boy's member and moved his fingers up and down the hardened shaft in rhythm to his thrusts. "Oh...God…Ta…kumi…I'm…," Gii gasped as his body began to quiver, every thrust the ebony-haired boy made feeling like fire. He arched his back and pressed down his hips. His whole body seemed to lift from the bed the moment his orgasm ripped from him and he screamed out in ecstasy. "Aaah…aaahh!" As he came his passage shivered and tightened sharply on Takumi's length. That was enough to drive the other boy over the edge as well and with a raw throaty cry of pleasure he released inside his amber-haired lover before collapsing heavily onto his heaving chest, his own breath hot and ragged. He slipped out of Gii's body and buried his face in the boy's shoulder, lying motionlessly for a moment.

One of the handsome upper-class man's hands disappeared into Takumi's dark, silky strands, stroking softly as he placed a few lingering kisses into the curve of the other's neck in a tender, loving caress. "I love you Takumi," he whispered huskily. "That felt amazing." The ebony haired-boy leaned up and caught Gii's lips in a slow, deep and sensual kiss. "I love you too," he sighed breathy after he had pulled away, his fingers gingerly trailing the contours of his lover's handsome face. "I'd like to do that more often in the future," Gii said softly, meeting the other boy's gaze. "If you agree that is." "Anytime," Takumi replied, smiling warmly. "And I'd like to…" With that he bent down to whisper something into his boyfriend's ear and Gii's eyes went wide with surprise.

"Do you think we could try that some time," the ebony-haired boy asked shyly. "Naughty, Takumi, naughty," the handsome upper-class man exclaimed, ruffling his beloved's hair lovingly. "Of course we can try that," he replied smiling. "I think it would be a quite exciting experience for both of us. But now allow me to pay you back for turning one of my phantasies into reality." With that Gii shifted his weight and maneuvered himself on top of Takumi in a swift motion to seal the boy's lips with a long, deep kiss of ardent passion that quickly developed into more.

THE END

A/N: What is it that Takumi would like to try in bed with Gii some time? I leave that to your imagination, my dear readers!

This is without a doubt the longest one-shot I've ever written and after re-reading it, I'm almost positive that the last part would definitely qualify as written porn. What does that teach us? I'm definitely reading way too many yaoi novels!

Last but not least, please be so kind to leave me a review for this story! Since the relationship between Takumi and Gii is a little different from usual, I'm curious about your thoughts. Besides, your comments are the best motivation for me to continue writing!