Disclaimer: I do not own Gintama, and if I was it would probably an yaoi one with Hijikata and Gintoki as the main pairing!~
Mayonnaise and Strawberries Aren't Usually Mixed Together
Chapter 1
"Oi, oi what are you doing here Mayora-san? Eating again rice topped with mayonnaise? You're wasting your pay check and your day off."
"Yorozuya! What are you doing here? What I do with my money is none of your business! And mayonnaise is one great food!"
"Yes yes, I really don't understand. Pops, give me the usual. This fellow over here pays."
"I'm not your wallet you idiot! Pay for your eating expenses! I don't want to use my money over dog food like that! Sweet beans over rice? That makes me sick!"
"What the hell is your problem? You have a nice pay check. And if we fight over who eats the real dog food, it is you!"
"What did you say? Mayonnaise is an almighty all purpose condiment that works well on anything!"
The shop owner butted to the two. "Sirs, you're bothering the other customers. Please quiet down!"
"If this is the case let's just settle this in a drinking contest." Gintoki suggested.
Hijikata responded. "Fine by me."
Hijikata and Gintoki went off to a random bar and started drinking.
"Heh… You're all words Yorozuya… hic… You can't handle… hic… alcohol… hic…"
"My name is… hic… Gintoki not Yorozuya… hic… Master give me some more."
"Customers, you seem to be drunk already. Please take some medicine. Here…"
"We are not drunk… hic…" Hijikata muttered.
"Please take some sirs. Our customer's welfare is also our responsibility."
"Okay." Hijikata and Gintoki muttered. They drink the medicine.
"What kind of medicine is this? I feel sleepy…" Gintoki started yawning and went to sleep."
"Me too…" Hijikata said.
xxxXoXxxx
The next morning…
"Ah, my head hurts… I shouldn't drink with Mayora-san anymore… What the hell?"
Gintoki just saw his body next to him, sleeping at the table. His faced turned into a pale color.
"Oi oi! Did something happened again? Wait, I have a real body, I'm wearing a blue yukata with a sword… hmmmmm… let's take a look at the mirror… Wow! I have a straight hair and its black! And my eyes are blue! I look like Hijikata. Did I get drunk so much? Wait! Gaaaaaah! I'm in his body!"
Gintoki went to wake up his body. "Oi my body! Wake up!"
"You're so loud!" Gintoki was pushed back.
"Who are you? Why are in your body?" Gintoki took a fighting stance.
"What are you saying? Your body? This is my bo-what the hell is this? Why I am wearing the white haired permed bastard clothes? And you-why do you look like me! Don't tell me you're my twin!"
Gintoki smacked him in the forehead.
"Calm down! You're Hijikata aren't you? Looks like we've switched bodies. Do you remember what happened last night?"
"No, I don't. Tsk… What the heck… Your body sucks." Hijikata said while lighting a cigarette.
"Oi stop smoking! You're damaging my body's health!"
"Tsk… I don't care! It is your body anyways!"
"You bastard!"
"But Yorozuya, I think we have a big problem that we have to face right now."
"What?"
"What's up with that question? How are we going to do about our jobs? Do you think someone will believe us? Hell no!"
"Ah, you're right. Hmmm… How about we pretend? You will act like me, and I will act like you. Just bear with it till we get back. I don't want this, but I think we have no choice right now."
"I get it. So how do I act like you anyway."
"Hmmmmmm… How do I describe my daily life? First, I read Shounen Jump, then watch tv, sleep, and eat if I don't have any work. Well, just go with the flow."
"You really don't have any work to do. It is so boring. When you act in my place, be sure to do all the paper works, patrol and discipline in the Shinsengumi! And never read Shounen Jump in the barracks! Don't ruin my reputation!"
"What kind of lifestyle is that? Ah, I want to get my body back…"
"I also want that! But we have no choice! And I smell something about our situation. We should think what happened last night."
"Then, let us ask who served the drinks yesterday. But I was drunk, I really can't remember who."
"Then I will ask the employees here."
"I will too."
After a while…
"Hijikata, they say none of them served us last night."
"Yeah, they also said that to me. Now, it is clear that he has something to deal with our situation. But for now, let us proceed with our plan. Let's meet up after a 3 days."
"Then, Hijikata er.. Gintoki.. see you then."
"Yeah. Yoro- er.. Hijikata-san."
Author's Note: So how was it? This is my second time I've written a fanfic. I really love reviews, so if you've read this one, tell me what you think. I plan to continue this one if I get some reviews. Thank you!
Special thanks to yukitomaso! I've started this ff because of you. I hope you'll read this one! I'll be awaiting your review and messages~