Felicity Smoak was dying. Had been for a long time.
There was no injury or fatal illness.
When Felicity was 5 years old she had been given a watch from her mother. The watch had a countdown to her death.
At first, Felicity didn't understand what the countdown meant.
Dying wasn't a familiar concept for her. She couldn't grasp the thought that one day she would be here and the next moment she wouldn't.
Then her dad left.
And Felicity began to understand the concept of loss. Of leaving and never coming back. How one person leaving could leave the people around them with a void that clawed at their heart so it would never stop hurting.
Then the countdown made Felicity sad.
She thought about how sad her mom was when her dad had left them, and he hadn't even died. It wasn't fair that her mom would also have to loose Felicity.
Then the countdown made Felicity angry. Angry that she had the burden of knowing when she would die. Angry that the universe deemed it fair to take her at such a young age. Angry at her dad for leaving, angry at her mom for not being a better mom.
That anger turned to rage. Felicity was damned if she couldn't at least control one thing in this universe. So she turned to hacking.
Computers gave her the outlet to control a system, hacking gave her the tools to right wrongs.
She was wild and rebellious, toying with the power at her university, turning every red light between work and home to green, not caring if she got caught. What would it matter? She would die soon anyway.
She met Cooper. He ignited a fire in her, taking her anger and focusing it on the broken and injustice system they all lived in.
But then it went too far.
They hacked the DOE and Cooper was arrested by the FBI for their crimes and hung himself before trial.
And then Felicity became content.
She too was going to die, and soon. She couldn't save the people around her from pain, she couldn't protect herself from it either. She might as well try to live the rest of her life quietly, doing what made her happy while minimizing her involvement with others. There would be less pain that way.
And then she met Oliver Queen.
