The life of a princess has to live through. Is it hate for a certain father? Or hate that the certain father can't take "no" or "please" as the answer.
No, it's the hate of a certain father that doesn't listen to my pleads.
I hate my life. It's meaningless to live with hate, despair, sadness. With a gravestone to talk, dead fields of sadness sweeps through every winter, a fall you can't grasp. How come I can't feel pain? The pain I should feel in my heart! Where is it? Every time there's an itch that wants to be scratch, but where is the itch?
I keep searching and searching, nothing.
Maybe I'm now realizing that I never felt anything when my mother died. The beautiful queen that brought people to kiss the ground she walks on, even the sea water she sails. But that can't be it..It shouldn't! I may of been a young girl, I have shed lots of tears thinking it was my fault, but it wasn't. The stupid disease did this!
Father knows that! But why?
Why does he keep looking at me like that; horrible expressions of love toward me, emotions expressing that it should've been me.
I don't remember anything months after my mother's death; felt light, felt like I was flying through time, not realizing my attitude changed, my smile gone, my height of seeing the world for it truly was.
But now...
Now my father leads. He has changed. I keep wondering if it was fault. Does he not feel guilt for hurting his only child? His leadership is now over his damn company for America, technology that doesn't matter, what brought this change of temper?
Why? Why do I see this?
That was my life.
Before I met him.
He change my pain to love. He opened my eyes. He had something I yearned, something that I want to follow and live with. He was the only one that knows the real me. But why! Why did you leave me!
Why!
All I wanted was one thing you promised me! Why did you go on that fucking boat!
I loved you. I'll always will.
I love you Oliver.
A/N: I understand. I know. I'm sorry about this... again.