I Tried to make this as random and funny as I possibly could XD the sad thing is I'm sick:( But I'm trying to make others happy so I can be too, so if its bad I blame my cold.
~kaylee162
Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note or Little Debbie
"So Watari we are going to the Little Debbie factory, right?" L asked hoping Watari didn't trick him. "Yes" Watari answered as he drove the 'Angel Crepe' van. "I don't see why we can't go to the store" Light complained. "Because there isn't enough" L answered. "We're here" Watari announced. "Yay!" L shouted with glee as he ran out but failed by hitting the door and falling to the ground. "Oh yeah you have to open it don't you" L said more to himself than to Light or Watari. Light opened the door for L who just stood up. "Yay!" L shouted again running out dragging Light behind by the handcuffs. L stopped when he realized they weren't the Little Debbie factory. "Watari where are we?" L asked. "don't you remember?" Watari said. "No" L answered. "Last Christmas" Watari said.
Deep inside L's memories
Christmas, one year ago
"Give me it!" The blond who was fighting with L, trying to frantically get the chocolate bar from him. "Nooooo!" L said as they basically played tug-o-war with said candy bar. In the mean time a albino boy was by the tree shaking each present to see what was in it, and constantly saying no. The care taker came walking in with a red head boy saying " How many times have I told you not to hack into my computer!" the red head just ignored him and kept walking. "L what are you doing?" The care taker asked. "Oh um well-uh" Before L could continue the blond quickly yanked the candy bar from the older man and then ran with it. L noticed this immediately and ran after him, a series of bangs,crashes and and swearing they finally came back into the room and the blond ran into a corner. then the albino boy finally got frustrated and threw the box he was holding on the ground which bounced off and hit L in the face, who landed on the floor with a thunk! the blond stared down for a moment then said "I never thought I would say this but thank you Near!" and then stuffed the whole chocolate bar into his mouth and swallowed. "Ha who's better now!" and all you could after that was L say dammit!
"Thank you Watari,for reviving those memories I was trying to keep suppressed!" L shouted to the older man. "Geez L you sure our in a bad mood today" Light commented. "Well I haven't had any cake today, and I need my frickin medicine!" L shouted quickly ,you almost couldn't understand what he was saying. "Crap! I forgot, okay Light make sure L doesn't run away, once you done that take him inside, and have Roger the care taker drive you and L's three successors to the mall to buy Christmas gifts for all the children, while I get L's cake and medicine" Watari said and then drove away from them. After Watari couldn't see what they were doing, L quickly tried to run but Light stopped him. "Ryuuzaki, we have to go inside" Light grunted. L gave up and walked slowly to the church like building and went inside.
"Hey Near you wanna go outside and play with us?" I brown haired girl with pig tails asked.
"No"
"Why?"
"Because"
"Because why?"
"Because I don't like you"
"Why?"
"Because your annoying"
"Why am I annoying?"
"Because you were made like that"
"Why was I made like that?"
"Do you really want to know?"
"touché" And with that the girl walked off with her friends to go outside. "I wonder if I could make him move"A blond boy was sitting by a red head boy playing a video game thought out loud. "Why don't see if you can" The red head said. "Hmmm" Thought the blond.
5 seconds later
"Mooooovvvvveee!" The blond shouted as he tried to push the boy or at least make him move a tinnie bit. "Look what I got!" L said as happily as possible. All three boys looked. Near's eyes widened as he saw the robot he had been wanting for months now in the hands of the man who he had hurt last year at Christmas. Near jumped up, then L tossed it to Light. "Keep it above your head!" L said. "Why?" Light asked."so he can't reach". Near kept jumping trying to reach the toy that should be his. "That is how you make him move" L said to the blond who was clearly pissed off. The blond scoffed at the comment. Near gave up and said. "You gay bastard" Light frowned. "I'm not gay you white emo son of a bitch!" Light spat. What is going on!" Roger the care taker boomed. everyone stopped. "You need to drive us to-"L stopped to look at a piece of paper Watari gave him before he left. "The Super Mega Awesome mall, is this correct Light?" L asked and showed it to Light. Light looked at it and nodded 'yes'. "Fine come on" Rodger said and led them to another 'Angel Crepe' got in the van. Roger started to drive to the mall.
"are we there yet?" the blond asked. "No" L said. "How about now?" The blond asked again. "No" L said again.
"Now?"
"No"
"How about now?"
"No"
"are we-" Before the blond could finish L shouted "No!"
"Well you don't have to yell!" The blond yelled back. "Will you just shut up for five minutes?" L said. The blond pouted and looked away.
5 minutes later
"Are we there yet?" Th blond asked again. "Yes!" L said obviously annoyed. "Really?" The blond said. "No" L answered blandly. The boy stared for a minute or so before throwing the half eaten chocolate bar at L's head which caused him to fall making Light also fall. Then the started to fight and kick each other and got tangled by the hand cuffs L and Light was wearing. "If you don't stop fighting I 'll flip this fucking car up side down!" Roger yelled. "How is that possible?" L asked. "I don't know,it just is!" Roger yelled. After that everyone was quiet and waited.
5 hours later
"Roger, what the crap man, its been 5 hours!" The blond said who was lying down on the seat bored out of his mind. "wrong turn" said the GPS they had. "Did that say wrong turn?" Near said. L looked over at the GPS. "Roger why are you following the red line?" L said upset. "Wait so your supposed to follow the green line?" Roger asked confused. "Yes!, Okay I'm gonna drive so Roger go in the back" L said as he pushed Roger to the back.
5 more hours later
"Okay we're-" L stopped as he looked to the back. "Oh my god I killed them!" L said loudly. Then the blonds hand came to view. "No but you almost did" He grunted out and fell back to the ground with a thud!" L got out and opened the doors. "Thank you Mello" L heard Roger say as he opened the door. Everyone got out. "Okay Watari is gonna pick you up, so I'll leave" Roger said. Roger went to the front of the van and started the engine and left. L clapped his hands "Okay so lets go in side shall we?" L asked. The five of them went into the mall and saw all the signs pointing out different aisles with different things in them. The three young boys stared in amazement.
"Okay everyone stay-" Before L could finish the three dashed off into different aisles. "Oh come on!" L shouted like couldn't believe what just happened. "Okay Ryuuzaki we have to think who is easiest?" Light said. "Near because he hardly every runs or moves" L said. They ran to the toy aisle and found Near beating the shit out of a boy for a toy. "Near!" L shouted with rage. Why must this happen to me? Near looked over at L and his eyes widened and ran away. Near eventually passed the chocolate aisle and saw Mello on the top of the self, and stopped for a second. "Uh-" Near said. "a really big dictionary" Mello said. "Oh" Near answered. Then heard L again and started to run again. "I thought you said he didn't run much" Light panted. "Well I never said he wasn't fast!" L coughed and then looked at the blond boy on the shelf. L was speechless so he just shook his head. 'These kids are gonna put me in my grave' L thought. Mello reached for a chocolate bar that was on the shelf. a sales lady came then. "I'm sorry you'll have to pay first" She said to Mello. That frustrated the blond then Mello threw the bar at her. "Mello!" L yelled. "What?, She was annoying me" he replied. "L we don't have time for this" Light whispered to L. "Yes Yagami-kun" L answered. The two left Mello and went to look for Near instead. Meanwhile Near ran into the game section where he ran into the red head. "Matt, L and that other guy who I forgot his fucking name are after me!" Near yelled at the red head. "Did you know we're a show?" Matt said ignoring what Near said. "Really? Oh thats... What hell didn't you just hear me?, L's coming!" Near said a little annoyed. "Well to bad for you" Matt answered. "If he sees you then he'll go after you too" Near said. L came into Matt's view. Matt quickly ducked behind a shelf and hide there. "Near!" L yelled again. Near started to run again. Once they were gone Matt picked up Death Note volume 1 and 2 and some games and went to find Mello.
Matt eventually found him on a shelf eating a chocolate bar. "Hey" the blond said. "Hey" Matt answered. Somehow Matt got on the shelf with Mello. "Hows Near?" Mello asked. "Being pursued." Matt replies. "Serves him right" Mello answers. They sit there in silence until Near comes running down the aisle with L and Light trailing behind. Near makes a break for the shelf which he successfully gets on. L stops to take a break. They are both hunched over panting and every now in then coughing a bit. Once they are done L stands in his normal like way and Light standing up straight. "Okay, than we'll wait for you to get down" L says. "Light~" A squeaky and familiar voice called. Light turned around and saw Misa in the aisle. "Oh god" Light said. L turned to see what was going on. "L run!" Light said as her ran for dear life and making L be dragged behind him. Misa ran after the two calling "Light~" The three boys watched. "I kinda feel sorry for him" Near said. "Why?" Mello asked. "I don't know..."Near said. "This is are chance to leave" Matt said. "Oh and do what, hijack a car?" Mello said sarcastically. Then the blond got and evil idea. "and that's what we're gonna do" He said as he jumped off the shelf and the other two followed. They ran out of the mall and into the parking lot and found a decent red car. "So how are we-" Near started but stopped when Mello broke the window with a piece of wood he had picked up on the way out. "That is how" He said with a smirk. He then unlocked the car and climbed in. Matt hot wired the car and got it started. Matt drove because he played a lot of Grand Theft Auto so he had some experience. They started drive off "wait!" Mello yelled. "I put bombs in the mall! He said enthusiastically. "We just have to wait till L and that guy come out" Mello said.
5 minutes later
L and Light finally came out with a girl hanging on to Light. "Okay now!" Mello said as he hit a button which made the mall explode into many pieces and the look on L face was priceless. "drive" Mello commanded. They drove off smashing into things and running over pedestrians. So far they were having fun until they saw L and Light behind them in a black car. "Matt go faster!' Mello said shaking the red heads arm while looking at the other car. They drove faster trying to lose L then an 'Angel Crepe' van came into view. Watari was in the van. The three then saw a man on the side of the road with his thumb up. "Matt lets pick up the hitchhiker" Near said crawling into the front. Matt stopped the car to let the man in for some reason. "Thank you, I just escaped from prison and need a ride" Said the hitchhiker. They watched him carefully. "I'm Beyond Birthday" He continued. "I've heard of you" Mello said. "You used to be at Wammy's House" Mello continued to say. "Why yes I was, how did you know?" Beyond asked. "L told me" Mello answered. "Well..." Beyond said spacing out. Matt started the car again drove as fast as the car would allow. But sadly ran out of gas but the good thing was they were at a lake right next to the boat shop. "How convenient" Matt said getting out quickly with Mello, Beyond and Near trailing behind. Matt went up to a boat broke the lock and got in. Thy others followed. "So who gonna drive?" Matt asked. "What?" The other three asked. "well I drove the car so who's gonna drive the boat. There was a long silence then all at once everyone turned to Near with an evil smile on their face. "Near!" Mello said. Near climbed to the front and hit the gas and they were off. Meanwhile L and Light not far behind because the boys took a lot of time thinking, got to the boat shop and rented a boat. They got into said boat and drove off and Watari did the same and pursued the boys.
The high speed case went on for a couple of Hours of the boys going in circles and L and Light following, but ended when Watari rammed into the boys boat. "Okay you are all into serious trouble!" L said furious. "Who fuck are you" L said to Beyond. "L-kun~ don't you remember?" Beyond said. "No" L replied. "He's been forgetting a lot today" Light butted in. "Beyond Birthday,BB,B your fucking backup!" Beyond said getting a bit carried away. "Oh,Yeah now I remember" L said. "Oh yeah, you do know you do have to go back to jail" L said blandly. "Yeah" Beyond said lowering his had sadly. "Okay Watari, take us back to where ever we got these troublemakers" L said pointing his thumb back at the boys. "Yes sir" Watari answered and drove them back to the boat shop then to Wammy's. "I really enjoyed spending time with you three" L said his eye twitching a bit. The three boys climbed out of the van and walked up the path to Wammy's entrance. "So L did you get everyone something?" Watari asked. "No, and I can't now because Mello blew up the mall." L answered the older sighed and drove off.
I hope you enjoyed my story XD it was hard to write because my 'E' button wasn't corroborating :) This is the longest thing I've written, I'm so proud :'D
