I apologise in advance for the unholy amount of fail containined within this story. Sasori is so OOC it almost hurts, but I meant for him to be so...I dunno if that still counts as a fail. I figured nobody could be that emotionless without having some kind of outlet, so I've made him a bit... Different in his head. He still acts like Canon!Sasori though. And Deidara is quite... Hormonal. I'm still working on them ¬¬ *Can only write KakuHida*
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto ^^
I stood before one of the most feminine men I had ever seen. Really the only way I could tell its gender was from his apparent lack of breasts (I'm not a pervert, I only came up to his chest) and deep, unfittingly masculine voice.
The rest of him, eyes and hair in particular, however could easily be mistaken for that of a girls. A detail not helped by the small fact that he was wearing the girls' uniform. At a glance he appeared to be a sweet mannered girl. Until he opened his mouth.
"But I don't want to be partnered with a nerd, un!"…Oh it is ON.
"Well I don't want to be with a gender confused man whore either, but you don't see me complaining do you? Quit your bitching brat," Yeah, take that b- oh fuck he's crying. Did I go too far? What's more, do I care? He just stared at me incredulously, visibly fuming
"You- You- I AM GOING TO KILL YOU, UN!" He slapped me. He even hits like a girl. Wait, did I say that out loud? I think I did, he just stormed off in a hissy fit and now Konan looks like she wants to shove my nuts in a blender
"I'm going to ignore that," she hissed at me icily through clenched teeth, "But he obviously isn't, so go and apologise!"
"But-"
"No buts! March!" she thrust a finger in my face and down in the direction the girly boy had run off. Scary finger. Seriously, it looked like it had 5 knuckles! Konan is quite terrifying when she wants to be.
I slouched off after him anyway and I would like to make it clear RIGHT NOW that I was not pouting. My bottom lip needed some air.
I don't see why I should apologise anyway, I didn't do anything. Well I did but it was nothing to cry over, God. Then again, he has got all those petty, bitchy little rumours going round about him. Honestly this is exactly why I hate people. I know from experience that they're never true and I suppose I hit a nerve or something…But in my defence he totally started it!
I found him sulking round the library. Why he chose there to hide I don't know, I mean if he thinks I'm a nerd why would he go where nerds are known to roam? Unless he wanted me to find him. Hm. He's smarter than he looks.
"Oi," the great Sasori needs no manners. I obviously scared him, he jumped a mile. It was quite funny, but I WILL NOT LAUGH. I AM EMOTIONLESS. I AM SLIGHTLY DISGRUNTLED ZEN.
"Oh it's you, un. What do you want?" Ack, that was cold
"Konan told me to apologise, so…Sorry?" I admit, I suck at this kind of thing. Oh wonderful, more glaring, great. Though it probably wasn't a good idea to tell him I was made to apologise
"You don't get it, do you? Men, un…" I was going to call him on that last part but…I really don't want to know what went on in this strange boys mind. Wait, what wasn't I getting?
"Are you, like, emotionally retarded or something, un?" Yes.
"I fail to see what that has to do with anything,"
"Of course you don't. That's because you're emotionally retarded, you're never gonna get a girlfriend, or a boyfriend for that matter with that shitty attitude, I mean you're not even trying are you, you're just going around pretending to have no emotions and being a wanker and- God I don't know why I ever thought you were cute, you're a right douche you bastard!" He kind of reminds me of Hi- what was that last part?
"Did you just- No, never mind I don't care, we're gonna be late," I loathe keeping people waiting and if he doesn't hurry his blonde arse up we're gonna be late for next lesson and we're gonna miss Pain. I already hate this kid.
"No. I'm not moving until you say sorry and you mean it, un" he harrumphed and started to sit cross armed and legged on the floor. Oh, Lord why? Why? WHY?
"I'm sorry and I mean it no come ON!" And now he's making me lose my stoic loner attitude. Just fucking great.
"No, un!" I'm going to have to kill him. He looks like he's going to rant again so I do the first thing that comes to mind: I kiss him. Hey I never claimed to be straight and he certainly didn't.
He seemed to be in shock so I dragged his slightly limp form back to where Pain and Konan were waiting for us.
"You didn't knock him out did you?" Pain questioned, used to Kakuzu doing the same thing.
"No, I-"
"Danna kissed me," he looked up at me moonily, did I somehow give him brain damage? Wait,
"Danna?" me and Konan chorused in shock, Pain simply raised an eyebrow
"Kissed?" I looked away, fighting the blush that was threatening my image – it was being quite abused today.
"It was the only way to shut him up," Deidara gasped, staring up at me with wide eyes and a look of horror,
"But- but- I thought we had something special, un!" I stared at him blankly; 5 minutes ago he was declaring his hatred for me, now he was acting like a 13 year old girl who'd just been rejected (which, admittedly wasn't far off)
"No, I was shutting you up," I confirmed. For a second it looked like he was going to start bawling again, but a grin broke out across his face and he clung to my arm. I contemplated removing it altogether.
"That's ok Danna, you'll be mine eventually,"
I looked up horror struck, only to find Konan stifling her laughter and Pain smirking at me sadistically, the bastard.
"Have fun then," He waved me off and turned back to…whatever it was he did when he wasn't with them. The blue haired woman followed with an evil grin on her usually gentle face, the bitch. I looked down at the blond nuzzling my arm. Well…Maybe it wouldn't be that bad.
See what I meant by fail? I officially can not write Sasodei. And I hate the name as well...And the summary, but it's half 12 at night and I can't think of anything else ¬¬