I don't know how long it has been that I have been here under this bench. The muggle architecture mocking me. Even in death, their filth haunts me. The brat and the old Fool have long ago passed me onto the next great adventure that I will never take.

Time really has no meaning in the land between life and death. For the first time in a long time, my soul was whole. No anchor to hold the pieces apart from each-other. The barrier to the afterlife is shut to me.

My small physical form has no nerves to feel pain. No heart to beat. No need for food or water. Weak and broken.

An endless existence of boredom. Time to reflect on my mistakes. To remember how it all went wrong. Wallowing self-pity. My emotions stinging with the power of a full soul once more. I had not been able to truly feel since my teenage years. When I made my first mistake.

Putting a piece of my soul into a vulnerable object. Stunting my emotional and mental growth by seeping myself in darkness at such a young age. It was folly. I never had a chance. All the power in the world cannot replace clarity of mind.

I should have strangled Potter with my bare hands. What I wouldn't give to rip the boy's insides out and feed him to Nagini. The thought of her brought tears to my eyes. Emotions are so hard to deal with when you have not felt them in so long.

I forced my self to climb onto the bench and sit upright after what felt like years. No way to tell time here in this place. No sounds other than my own sobs of self pity. Tricked, humiliated, companion-less, penniless, alone. Beaten by a child's blind luck, again and again.

Eons passed.

I grieved for myself alone. I am the only one I ever loved. I have never felt a touch of affection nor a kind word. The things I wished I could have given myself, if I had another chance. The pleasures of the flesh I had killed and mutilated so much of. All the attractive witches I had tortured without a thought to taking my own pleasure from their bodies. The taste of sweets I had ignored. Sports and games to bring me entertainment.

Pitting muggle filth or mudbloods in an arena against half-breeds like centaurs or veela. It would have been great to see. I was more concerned with the big picture. Consumed with negative emotions, like anger and envy.

Too blinded by hatred to truly enjoy the simple pleasures of a little muggle girl screaming as a werewolf chewed her limbs off.

I felt a strange feeling. Like a sinking in my non-existent stomach.

I had forgotten to create a new world rather than take over the old one. I had a chance to make a difference and I squandered it. I betrayed myself. My own pleasures overlooked for need to satisfy my overwhelming hatred. I should have enjoyed myself far more in the far too short life I had 'lived'.

I felt something for the first time...

Regret.

Like the lumos, a light shined from from me. When the light cleared, I has whole once more. I was as young in body than when I had when I first split my soul. Pale white fingers and shoulder length black hair. I felt whole and young again. I could feel my power pulsing under my skin once more.

I sat on the bench and cried in happiness that the love of my life could feel again. My hands ran over my pale flesh and I laughed. I was delighted to hear the sound of a voice, other than the high pitched scratchiness of the broken souled form I had been for so long.

A sound for the first time in eons.

A train horn. The Hogwart's Express was making it's way to the platform in front of me. The engine slowed as it passed me. The last carriage stopped in front of the bench.

I was allowed to leave this place? After so long?

I stood for the first time in ages and made shaky steps to the opening carriage door. White light poured through the crack as the door slowly opened. I used my shaking hands to pull it the rest of the way open. I took the step onto the train and into the white.

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