Hey, I'm not bore guys with "hey I'm new to fanfic" or "please be nice in the comments", all I'm going to say is enjoy, ~THE NORDICKS ON CRACK~
Norway:God damn it!
Danmark:This is gonna be interesting
Finland:I feel crazy
Sweden:...hm...
GUYS SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LISTEN !
Iceland: Oh I see they can say something but I can't!?
Sorry Iceland! :( BUT WHATEVER! SWEDEN TELL THE READERS THE WARNINGS AND EVERYTHING!
Sweden:...
AWWWW DON'T GIVE ME THE SILENT TREATMENT!
Sweden:...
Sweden: No one in fanfiction (at least we don't think so) own Hetalia, including us. Also don't take any of this stuff to heart. It's crack so don't get offended if we make fun of a character or something.
Also! This story is highly dangerous since it is a crack story. Here are some WARNINGS! This will melt your mind, you will have to take therpy from drunk England, your new mother might be Netherlands...or even Turkey, last and final Russia will sneek into your pet's small cage and stare at you in your sleep! Let the story start!
"SWEDENNNNNNN!" Finland screamed as he takled the big swedish man to the ground.
"OMGZ! FINLAND!?" Sweden screamed back "I'M TRYING TO CATCH BUTTERFLIES!" Sweden loved butterflies! They were his friends, bff's,...LOVERS!
"Sweden I just found a perfect store to buy dirt at!" Sweden never understood Finland, Finland always bought things that they didn't really need. Like for example, the time they bought England. But one thing they will always need is the great and powerful, sexy beast Sealand.
"FINLAND!"
"What?"
"WE CAN JUST DIG FOR DIRT!"
"No but this is glow in the dirt...dirt"
"..."
"..."
"OMFG! That's fucking amazing let's go!" So than Sweden and Finland ran inside to get everyone."Hey finland should we take the dog?" Sweden said pointing to a chained up Denmark.
"Meow" The dane screeched in responce.
"Yeah we should!" Finland untied Denmark the human dog thing.
"Sweden! Go get Iceland and Norway!" he looked at Sweden for his reaction to being commanded to do something.
"UGGHH! Always have to do everything, might as well call you mooooom!" Sweden yelled as he stormed upstairs.
"Damn, I like it when they call me mom..." Finland said licking his lips.
"Guuuuys Finland is being a whore and wants to know if you guys want to go buy dirt!" with irritation to his voice, he finished.
"Likeeee, that sounds like tots graet, sruuue I'll like go." Sweden's eye twitched in annoyance as Norway finally finished his sentence. What was with Norway getting constantly drunk!?
"I'm going. I don't care if you say no. I'm still going."Iceland crossed his arms, "I was invit-"
"No. I don't care. I'm still going." Iceland cut in.
Damn Iceland's teenage attitude. The threesome all left downstairs to meet up with Finland. They all went to the car and debated on who was the unlucky asshole who had to drive. They decided to let Denmark the dog drive.
"LETS SING A SOOOOOOONG!" Sweden yelled in a high pitched voice.
"Which like, song" Norway asked.
"OHHHHHHH~! A HUNDRED BOTTLES OF BEER ON THE WALL, A HUNDRED BOTTELS OF BEER! TAKE ONE DOW-"
"NO!NO!NO! We are going to put the damn beer back in the wall! Because I fucking hate that fucking song!" Finland yelled cutting off Sewden's magical song. They all said "Sorry mom." In unison, Finland let out a moan and the car went quiet.
'Yes, keep calling me mom' Finland thought.
After a long akward drive in silence, thanks to fucking Finland. They finnaly arrived at the convince store.
"Hello how may I help you," a man with early balding asked with a voice saying 'I really don't want to help you'. Ah, your classic asshole store clerk.
"Well hello," Finland began than looked closely at his name tag "Bob, I mean heh, Boob." Finland snickered, he thought that he was funny.
"Like, sorry for, like his behavior, so, like, ya" Norway told 'Bob'.
"we came to get glow in the dark grass!" Sweden sang happily to the man.
"No it was fucking dirt." Finland spat at Sweden.
"DIRT!"
"GRASS!"
"DIRT!"
"GRASS!"
"We don't hold that" Bob told them.
"Are you fucking kidding me?" Iceland muttered.
"Where like can we like, like, find it?" Norway asked.
"Actually it's in another country." Bob stated.
"where." Iceland demanded.
"Russia" Bob said smiling.
"RUSSIA" all discluding the dog screamed then they died. Denmark shrugged and decided that it was up to him to buy the glow grass or dirt in Russia. Denmark screeched at the store clerk and left the store.
Once he was outside he was hit by a pickup truck drove by Russia. The force of Russia's weight killed him instantly. Now all of the Nordicks were dead. There land was soon taken over by the powerful country of Sealand.
~the end?~
Sealand smiled, while gigling "Yes! My fanfiction on my stupid and dumb family is complete!" Sealand cheered, "Now to upload this on the web and show the other countries! Now they'll see how smart and amazing I am when they read this!"
And so Sealand showed the other countries, it embarrsed the crap out of the Nordics, but they tried not to show it, also Sealand became the best writer in all of the world.
Hope you liked it!