500 Word Drabble:
Disclaimer: I wish I owned Castle. (:
Summary: He watches.
He Watches:
He watched her silently, secretively from his position in his chair beside her desk that smelled of her cherry shampoo. He watched her go through her daily motions gracefully. Every move she made caused him to fall deeper in love with her He smiled, not caring that his subtle watching of her wasn't so subtle. The guys would not speak of this to her. He trusted them. They might continuously torture him about this later, but he didn't care. The tingling in chest at their teasing in the all too sensitive subject would never amount to the heartache he felt on the days that he watched them. The days Josh caressed her face and she gave him a smile of pure bliss. It should be him doing that, and it should be him receiving that brilliant and breathtaking smile. Not Josh. Resent consumed and engulfed him. It made him want to flee, to turn away from them at the very least, but he could not. His muscles would not cooperate.
Pain filled him as she placed a kiss on his lips.
He wondered sometimes how she could not notice his ever-growing feelings for her. After all, she seemed to notice absolutely everything else, so why, when it came to that, did she seem to live with a shield in front of her eyes? It was not truly like he was complaining, except that he kind of was. In a way, he wished that she knew. He wished that she knew that she was the last thing he thought about before falling asleep at night and the one that he was constantly dreaming about. He wished that she knew how much he loved her and wanted to hold her, to touch her, to kiss her, to make her his. He wanted her to know everything (it would make things so much easier), and yet at the same time, he still wanted to be in the dark.
Because what if she knew and did not share his feelings? What if it became a thing between them? It would be elephant in the room that would never disappear and that would hang over their heads forever until one of them inevitably gave up and quit trying to make their friendship work. It would be her because, although he would never be able to deal with his emotions and erase them, he could ignore them. He had been doing that for so long, and he figured that he could do it for longer because even if she did not share his feelings, he still needed her in his life. Even if he would have to deal with the daily pain of her rejection, it would not hurt as much as never seeing her again or sharing the relationship that they did. Of course, she would ignore it for a while. She would do her best to forget. They could go on for years, maybe, but it would never go away. She never could truly forget.
But the betraying thought, the one that caused his heart to pound hopefully, whispered to him. What if she loves him too?
I was going through old files and discovered this. Thought I would share. I hope you enjoy this. (: