Etudes
by Chocolate Pencil
Written to Frederic Chopin- Etude Op. 10 No. 3 in E major
For Michelle, my bff
If music be the food of love, play on,
Give me excess of it; that surfeiting,
The appetite may sicken, and so die.
-William Shakespeare, Twelfth Night
The soft breeze from open windows carries the euphony of notes down the deserted school hallway, filling the classrooms with the faint sound coming from the music room. Sakura Haruno sat at the large, rather worn out grand piano playing on it.
She first touched a piano at age three and she can still remember the gleaming white keys shining like stars. After incessant begging for piano lessons, her parents caved in and she discovered the world scales, arpeggios, steady rhythms and pretty notes. Sakura absolutely loved it. . There's something magical about piano to her, something enthralling and enchanting; the notes were a hypnotic spell and she still hasn't broken out of it.
The piece draws to an end and Sakura slows down, finally ending with a drawn out note and a grand flourish of her arms. She hears polite clapping coming from the doorway and snaps her head towards it. It is her first time practicing at this school and she didn't exactly feel comfortable with the idea of a stranger watching her.
The stranger is a boy around her age with black hair, black eyes, and handsome features clapping crisply like an adult. Sakura blushed.
"Thank you," she says. "Do you play piano too?" The boy nods.
"Yes. I played that piece too," he replies, obviously meaning the piece she just finished. "Etude in E major by Chopin?"
"Yeah!" Sakura answers, enthusiastic as ever about music. Then, hesitating a little, she asks, "Er- do you think that you could, um, play it for me?" The boy tilts his head as if considering it, and nods.
The minute he starts playing, Sakura is captured. There's something different about the way he plays it and the way she does- she can't put her finger on it but the difference is there, and she likes how this boy plays it. It's almost sad- but it's not quite a sad song- maybe bitter? No, no that isn't right either.
"That was amazing," she gushes when he finishes. "It was so beautiful."
The black haired boy looks at her with confusion on his face. "You played it very well too."
Sakura blushes again. "Thank you- but you played it- you played it in a different way. It was sad or something." His face clears up in understanding.
"Oh," he says. "That." And then he shrugs. "No big deal."
Sakura wants to know more but decided not to press it. Instead, she asks, "What's your name? I'm Sakura Haruno."
"Sasuke Uchiha," he answers. "I haven't seen you before."
"Oh! I'm here for the big piano competition that's in August- my piano teacher wanted me to be here a month early to get to know everything so here I am," she explains, smiling shyly. "Are you going to do the competition too?"
"No. I don't play in competitions," Sasuke states. Sakura stays silent for a minute, not sure how to respond to this. Most everyone she knows who plays piano plays competitively too.
"So, do you practice here too?" she asks, groping for a conversation topic. She's not really such a social person, choosing to bury herself in piano playing. It's easier that way; no chance of saying the wrong thing or getting on anyone's bad side. She's seen that happen to so many people, rising to the top and falling to the bottom like ocean tides or scales.
"Yes. We have a piano at home, but I like this place better," Sasuke says.
Sakura frowns, if he practices here too, then she must be messing up with his schedule. He probably found that annoying. "Do you mind me here? I mean, I'm using the only piano."
"It's fine. I can practice any time I want, since I play for fun only. And I can always go home."
"Why don't you practice at home?" Sakura blurts out without thinking, then realizing how rude and nosy that sounded. "Sor-"
"You don't have to apologize for everything," Sasuke tells her. "I don't like playing at home because my older brother is there."
"Oh." That seems to be the only thing I ever say, Sakura thinks embarrassedly.
"I can help you practice if you want," Sasuke offers. Sakura looks at him with surprise.
"Huh?" she asks.
"Well," he starts, "You play pretty well. But you could always use more help, you know?" Sakura wonders if this is just a nice way of saying that she played horribly.
"Um."
Sasuke looks embarrassed. "Sorry. It's just I like teaching piano and- never mind, sorry for bothering you, I'm going-"
"No!' she yells, and flushes again. "I mean, sure. I would love more help." The black haired boy looks relieved.
"Well. Do you want to get started?"
x
"Okay, so what do you think this part would be described as?"
"Described as?"
"Described as, yeah. Adjectives and all."
"Uh, I guess...flowing? Grand?"
Sasuke's method of teaching is not something Sakura is used to. Her teacher made her practice the same spot over and over again, correcting her on rhythm and dynamics and such. Sasuke focuses on emotion and feeling, often making her repeat the section with more emotion, more thought, not like a robot or a machine, a human, you are human, aren't you?
Sasuke nods at her statement. "Okay, good. So play it while thinking of flowing and grand thoughts."
Sakura stared at him, unsure of what he meant. "Like, think of something flowing and grand? Wouldn't that distract me from the music? "
"No, not like that," Sasuke corrects. "Feel grand. Feel flowing. Put it in the music."
"How do you-"
"I can't tell you," he interrupts. "You should know that music is a personal journey."
Even though Sasuke is a near stranger, she wants to strangle him right now. He's so difficult sometimes. Personal journey or not, she needs to know how to play this piece for the competition, and that was what she was focused on. She knows how to play it, of course, but he said that he wanted to teach her. She isn't learning anything now.
However, Sasuke is stubborn and unmoving so Sakura has no choice but to try to feel grand and flowing.
But once she thinks about it, this is better than practicing in the designated studio the piano contestants were encouraged to go to; she hates those places where competiveness is crammed in every corner and filling the air. You try to make friends and they talk to you, but inside everyone is harboring the question, "can I beat them? Can they beat me?" It's uncomfortable, to say the least.
Sasuke isn't like that at all. He has a slightly indifferent air around him, as if nothing in the world was really of any importance. But he wasn't that bad.
x
When Sasuke walks in the door of the music room Sakura blurts out a question so fast there's no time to take it back after second consideration.
"Do you want to go do something after this?" she asks. Sasuke gives her a baffled look.
"What do you mean by that?" he asks slightly warily. Sakura turns red- she does a lot when Sasuke's around- and stammers out an explanation.
"Well- um, we, um, only know each other through music so I was thinking that maybe we should get to know each other better so maybe we could hang out later or something," she says in a rush.
Sasuke face is unreadable. "Sure," he replies.
After the informal lesson, Sakura shuffles her papers into a pile and looks at Sasuke nervously.
"So," she begins. "Um…is there anywhere you want to go?"
"No," he says. "You?"
Sakura ponders this for a moment, not sure if her decision would fly by Sasuke. "Well, do you know any ice cream shops?" Everyone liked ice cream, she thought. Hopefully, he wasn't lactose intolerant.
"Yeah. C'mon."
The ice cream shop looks new, lights white and glaring and the tiles squeaky clean. The two teenagers working behind the counter look bored and impatient; irritably asking customers what they wanted and slouching as they stood. Sakura chose the strawberry ice cream, and turned to ask Sasuke what he wanted.
"I don't like sweet things," he says indifferently. Sakura reddens. If he didn't like sweets, then why did he come here in the first place? Why not suggest somewhere else? Oh god- he was trying to be nice, was he? He didn't want to-
Seeing the unconscious expression Sakura made, Sasuke chooses coffee ice cream.
"I'm sorry," she stammers. "I didn't know you didn't like sweets."
"Doesn't matter. I can still eat it, if that's what you're worried about," he answers.
They sit in a rather uncomfortable silence as they eat their ice cream cones, Sakura desperately trying to think of something to say, and Sasuke looking out the window. Suddenly, something strikes her.
"Hey…Sasuke?"
"Hm?"
"You know how when we first met…I said that you played it differently than me. And then you just shrugged it off?" Sakura asks.
"Yeah."
"Could you, um, explain that to me?"
Sasuke looks down at his ice cream cone, which is barely touched and dripping. "You play it like you know it's supposed to sound sad, so you play it sad. But really, you don't feel the sadness. You feel happy, or normal, and that's what it sounds like. A song played by a person without a care."
"Oh." Sakura takes another lick of her ice cream. "So, you feel the sadness?"
Sasuke shrugs. "I guess. Some people have said that I'm a rather bitter person."
Sakura can't think of a reply for this, but before she says "oh" or "I see" like she would usually do, she remembers that silence is just as important as sound.
And Sasuke would understand.
They sit in compatible silence as the world goes by.
x
It's the beginning of August and Sakura is grateful that the building had air conditioning. The heavy late-summer heat sticks on your skin like another layer and it made her want to stay in the hotel and do nothing, and Sakura wouldn't be able to stand playing the piano in the muggy heat. Sasuke acts like the heat was nothing more than a small bother.
That's Sasuke.
"Now, play with emotion this time," he commands, like he usually did.
Sakura tries to play it from the bottom of her heart, which sounds really cheesy but it's true, and she tries to feel sadness and bitterness but the only time she could remember is her grandmother's funeral where the people wore black and she had no idea what was going on.
After she's finished, Sasuke frowns n thought for a moment and then says; "It's getting better," which was all the compliment Sakura was going to get. She smiled.
"Well, I think we're done," Sasuke says. "Bye."
"See you tomorrow!" Sakura replies cheerfully.
Sasuke gives her a look that was almost regretful, and his eyes are dark black and sad.
"Sakura," he start, hesitating a bit. "I'm…going a trip tomorrow. I won't be back until school starts."
She took the news like a spoonful of bitter medicine being pushed down her throat, eyes widening and breath catching as she frantically processed what he had told her.
"So…I won't see you again?" she confirms timidly. "Never again?"
"Well, you might, Anything is possible, technically."
Sakura's shoulders slump in disappointment; then puts on a forced smile. "It's fine. Have fun."
Sasuke nods and turns to leave, but turns back and faces her again. His eyes are unsure of himself and he looks fully uncomfortable.
Then he kisses her, straight on the lips.
It's unexpected and nothing like the kisses described in books, no setting sun or music or beautiful backgrounds. It's just Sasuke and her in the dusty music room, and while it's not perfect, it's the most perfect first kiss Sakura can imagine.
He's gone before she opens her eyes.
x
Sakura goes to the competition in a stuffy dress that's absolutely killing her in the heat and sits there in the faux-velvet seat, her stomach turning over and over with nervousness. One by one, competitors file up to play their pieces, each more stunning and grand than the last.
How in the world, Sakura thinks, can I beat them?
She still feels confusion from her kiss with Sasuke, she still feels sad that he left. After that day Sakura went back to playing alone the in the music room, feeling empty and lacking.
It's her turn. The lights grow brighter and Sakura feels a flush spreading over her cheeks. She bows, and begins to play.
She tries to play from the heart. She thinks about sadness, she thinks about heartbreak, she thinks about the feeling you get when you know you're never going to see someone again. She pours it into the piano and for one moment she thinks she's going to cry.
Sakura Haruno wins third place.
A wonderful interpretation, the judges said. Sad, like it usually is, but strangely hopeful too.
Beautiful. Just beautiful.
Positively bittersweet.
Sakura isn't quite sure if she wants her piece to sound like that; she almost misses her old style. The not-a-care-in-the-world style.
With these thoughts she floats over to the reception, where people in ties and dresses and heavy makeup congratulate their kids or comfort them, and she moves towards the entrance and tries to avoid her parents.
"That was nice." someone comments. Sakura's heart jumps because she thinks she knows who it is.
Sasuke is standing near the pillar, next to her, smiling.
She doesn't ask about why he was there or how in the world did he not go on his trip. He explains later; how his vacation ended earlier than usual due to his brother. At that moment, she doesn't need to know.
"It looks like you finally played from the heart," he remarks with a grin.
Sakura grins back and throws her arms around him.
finis
A/N: Yay, a happy ending just for you, Michelle. Aren't I a great friend? :D
Some suckage, but I'm on a semi-writer's block right now. D:
Please review! :)