THIS IS IN RESPONSE TO MYSELF'S AND PRINCESS TURKS 3RD WEEKLY CHALLENGE…. BASED THIS WEEK ON DIR EN GREY'S SONG 'GLASS SKIN' INVOLVING ANGST AND GENESIS! FOR 7/5/10-7/11/10
WARNING:
Angst…. Yaoi Refrences… Self mutilation… cliffy….
DISCLAIMER:
I do not own final fantasy or its characters. I also do not own the band Dir En Grey (though I love them), nor do I own their Song or its title 'Glass Skin', or its lyrics… I have simply used it as the inspiration for our challenge this week, and this particular fic, and the feelings around it!
A/N:
This Fic is a stand alone ONESHOT but also is a tie-in story for two of my Fic's in my Elemental Arc, "Cuprum"(about Sephiroth's and Genesis relationship…mainly Genesis…..not written or on ff.n yet), and latter parts of "Argentum"(About Sephiroth's rebirth...and past relationships with Cloud and Geneisi…..not written or on ff.n yet)
I have the song's lyrics written out before the story this time…. Because I tend to write all of my song inspired fics in the same manner, and wanted this one to reflect the serious depth that I would like my Elemetal Arc to reflect more accurately. But the Song "Glass Skin" by Dir En Grey (a Japanese band) is the direct inspiration. I have the English sung version of this song as well as the Japanese version if anyone wants to hear it…. Or simply look it up on you tube… it's a beautiful.. poetic… and slightly haunting song, I highly recommend it!
DIR EN GREY;
"Glass Skin"
Lyrics:
It comes and slowly stains my heart
that's been cold, all alone and so tightly closed
The sins are scattered everywhere
They're around me
I can't see it
It vainly comes just crashing down
In this sad and forgotten little town
The truth we tend to look the other
way from lies down deep
I open out my wings of glass
Up and towards the wind melted future
So just please don't go
Please don't go
Be close to you
I lay my hand on top of the heavy and
closed-out door and I pray
The lonely future left for me is
one meaning of just living
It comes and slowly stains my heart
that's been cold, all alone and so tightly closed
The sins are scattered everywhere
They're around me
I can't see it
It vainly comes just crashing down
In this sad and forgotten little town
The truth we tend to look the other
way from lies down deep
I open out my wings of glass
Up and towards the wind melted future
So just please don't go
Please don't go
Wanna be close to you
I'm now forgetting even the colors
of your tears and love
So just please don't go
Please don't go
Holding on strong to what lies ahead
I bleed as my way of
compensating everything to you
How heavy is blood?
Happiness and sadness lies too close
The hand of the child born
tomorrow will be just pure and
nothing else
I can barely see you with all these tears
I open out my wings of glass
Up and towards the wind melted future
So just please don't go
Please don't go
Wanna be close to you
I'm now forgetting even the colors
of your tears and love
So just please don't go
Please don't go
Holding on strong to what lies ahead
The bells of reality rings out
loudly from down deep within
And disappears along with all the wind
Lyrics: 'Glass Skin'
'
, [end]
'WIND MELTED FUTURE'
: of the Elemental Arc
(Tie-in of Cuprum, and Argentum)
~Genesis POV~
Flashback :
"Why do you want to go… now! All of a sudden Genesis!" Angeal asked me that life changing day. "You HATE Shinra… You have been against 'ME' joining since the start. WHAT HAPPENED!" Angeals hands went to the young Genesis' shoulders. As the later turned their face away in shame.
"Angeal… you've always been there for me… I know. But things changed. It's been done for a long time. I just didn't want YOU going. For once… I wanted to…" Genesis trailed off. They were the same age. But sometimes, when Genesis looked into Angeal's eyes… he felt that he was merely still a child next to his protective friend and blood brother. "Make sure that you were safe… your mother needs you around." Genesis shrugged it off as something simple, though his brilliant blue eyes betrayed him.
"Gen… I'll be there shortly after you. Please. If you don't listen to anything else I say here and now. Stay safe. I wish you weren't going. I guess… I can't say anything more." The dark haired friend turned to walk away. Genesis was due to leave at noon. Why he waited this long to tell him, Angeal might never know. And he would certainly never tell the other, that he felt betrayed in this moment.
Genesis silently ran up behind Angeal, and threw his arms around his shoulders in a silent hug. He clung onto the broader man just like he was a young boy hiding from the bully's again. "I am always in your debt in this life my brother… and I will never forget it…" He managed to whisper out without his tears choking his voice to betray him.
"No… Gen… I'll always look out for you… Till there is no way left for me to do so." Angeal said but it was too late. The arms had vanished as his friend fled the scene of their favorite spot from childhood. "It's my honor and… my duty… my brother…"
: End Flashback
I had waited on telling you… for a reason. You always were the strong one of us. Like brothers, inseparable. No matter what the people who had raised me, tried to say or do. They couldn't separate us. Your mother was kind, we sheltered from my family's anger… at me… many times in the tree's outside of our village.
A part of me was slowly dying every day from that moment on. Knowing that something was different in my soul and that I was searching for something. But we still made it together in the end didn't we? We both made 1st. But not before we had met and bonded with Sephiroth. You never really knew what to think of our relationship.
Heh… Sephiroth… My silver demon… or are you a mere colorless entity. Even now after everything… you can't let go of me. Part of you knows that I am near. Watching you, feeling you, crying out to you in silence.
Angeal didn't like our relationship, but despite his concern… without telling me why… I still loved you. I loved you, you traitorous wretch. Hm… yet I still… love you… yes. I do.
I held you and you held me. All the while you didn't give your all to me. We declared love and made love. We touched, we hurt, we cried out for each other… yet you still withheld part of yourself. And then with held the gift of life from me.
You fool. Which of you? BOTH OF YOU! You fools! Angeal… you Withheld something too. You KNEW the truth. You knew who we were, how we were made. You knew… my 'Brother'… and yet you allowed me to live in my own naivety. You hurt me… by not telling me. You LET me believe I COULD love… and LIVE. But no…
And Sephiroth… you are cursed by the goddess my silver demon. You withheld your love from me, your 'true' love. And then… ARGHhhh! You FOOL! I could still be by your side. WHY did you withhold your life sustaining essence from me! Because of HIM… wasn't it!
Hah… now look at you… now look at your precious angel … or angels… you are alone. You are being eaten by the goddess's enemy. Alive… being consumed.
~Story POV~
Genesis stood against the rock face, watching the burning horror of Nibelheim burning to the ground. The Red ex SOLDIER First, was a rattled mess. Too many battles. His body finding it harder and harder to regenerate after being hurt.
He stood flexing his damaged black wing. Blood dripping off of him as fast as the sweat was. He was lost in his own mind. Betrayal of friends, lovers, and family. He had to set back and watch as the only person that had been like a mother to him, killed herself. The horror of it all magnifying the fact that his friend and Brother in life betrayed the only hope of existence he had. He'd had to watch as the man threw his 'Honor' away.
His wing feeling like it was shattered and his body and skin like etched and broken glass. His body was wasting away slowly… his cells all like a cancer. A terminal cancer… too eat him away to dust; His hair once a wash of copper and cinnamon, now turning putrid and stale looking, his once androgynous and beautiful exterior, taking on an indefinable pallidity. No longer rare and beautiful and loved. Only hated, expelled, betrayed, and left to rot.
He had learned of his true past and origins, and how in fact he was connected to Angeal, and subsequently even to his lover, Sephiroth. He once felt his friends loyalty was tried and true… but only through tests and trials that have befallen in an extremely short time period only just over 2 years, did the truth come out. Angeal let his faults lead him to a cowards exit from this world, and to force his beloved pupil to be the one to do it for him.
And Sephiroth… Genesis watched as the man seemed to become another being inside. He watched his Silver demon turn on the people that had once taken him away from Genesis. Or so Genesis thought. It was all one large game to the pallor faced ex first. One set of pawns out of the way for the larger, more important figures to move about in their Gaia-Damned dance.
His sweet demon then seemed to lose as he was cast into the lifestream. But Genesis knew. He knew that was only the beginning. No, Gaia would not accept this newly turned demon. Only with the goddesses gifts that had been bestowed upon the degrading man, did Genesis know that his silver demon was conscious and well. All around them soon. Yes… there would be a future. Sephiroth would not rest in peace after what he had refused Genesis.
Genesis would remain cursed as well, and barely the shell of a broken man… and would await his Silver Demon's return.
~Genesis' POV 5 years later~
"NO! You can't leave me…. Please don't go…. Please…. Don't go…." I am crying for you. You can't leave me like this. You were cursed to remain till you gave me life as well. And… I don't want you to disappear.
"Whats that" I can't see where you are calling from. "Your voice is beautiful… pure melody… please… don't stop…" I can feel you… more than I can hear you. I don't want to be alone, please make it so. "Yes… anything you say… please make it SO!"
~Story's POV~
Genesis knelt over the lifeless body of the man he cursed and hated with vengeance in his spiteful moments. But cried out for and loved deeply in his dreams. The body was still slightly warm from the battle. He had watched from afar, sure that Sephiroth would best the challengers. Whether it was best for the planet… who knew.
But now he knelt, tattered and broken… even more a wraith in appearance than he thought possible. He didn't know how much longer he could hold on waiting for his Silver Demon… but now. All hope was lost.
He listened to his own cries travel endlessly in the snowy landscape. Nothing to stop them. And only when he felt he heard his own cries turn into the calls of the goddess did his screams and tears stop. He thought he heard the goddess… in a sweet and calming voice tell him that Sephiroth was never truly gone. And that he could be at peace now if he allowed himself to be. But the words that stuck out and that he couldn't hear past… were those of 'hope' for his silver demon.
"Yes… anything you say… please make is SO!" He cried out. And felt a gentle warmth wrap around his own pale and deathly thin frame and that of the unbreathing man in his arms. But instead of embracing the warmth he took a breath and allowed his wing to release once more.
He fled… flying… taking off, not wanting to see the dead lifeless body of his once lover. So much had been said inside of his own heart through these years of wait. He ached to hold and be held by those sturdy arms again. And feeling them lifeless was close to being the undoing of what remained of the man.
The planet cried for him. Wanting to call him to peace now. His aimless wandering could be done. His haunting and meaningless existence could be done… and be at peace. But instead the planet could feel his shuddering cries, silent though they seemed, as he returned to the façade of the ruined town that was once his home.
Genesis found himself setting beside that tree from so long ago that lay just outside the city. Basking in the warmth of the sun.
"I will not die… I will not cease to exhist. Oh goddess… thou shall not take me. Must I become a ghost and wander this land in mind and spirit only… then I shall. But though I may die in body… I never shall let go in soul. You shall give back life to the one I still love. And I shall be here when you do. Even if I must live in frozen sleep. Or rot into the ground. I will still remain."
"though my sins swim around all over… I will not give up. The cold and lonely future is all I have. So I shall hold on. And wait. Please… don't make me go… I want to hold on strong to what lies ahead"
"The bells of reality rings out loudly from down deep within And disappears along with all the wind… My wind melted future lies ahead…" Genesis closed his eyes to fall asleep to a dream that held him. Rocked him, mind and soul… lulling him to slumber on and on. One day… he would open his eyes, but until then… the planet will hold the man who was fragile as glass.
"Please don't go…" the wind whispered…
END
2ND A/N: Well… I know it may be a lil confusing. Hope its not too bad for some people. It should be able to be a stand-alone story but also will tie in my others. I'll be getting more done on the Elemental Arc of stories soon. But I really need to catch up on 'My Road' *sheepish grin* sorry… I'm 2 weeks over due on getting chapters out. Guess that means I need to write 3 chapters to catch up :P alrighty then!