A/N: This is just a little Jogan one-shot that I had in my head all day and I just had to write it. I hope you like it. Reviews are love. :-)
It had been a lazy and boring day. It was freezing and snow had been falling all day long. So most of the Stuarts had stayed inside enjoying the warmth in front of the fireplace. It was slowly getting dark outside and Logan wondered where his boyfriend – yes boyfriend- had spent the day because he hadn't been able to find him all day.
When Logan had knocked on this door around noon he didn't get a response which was weird. Normally Julian wouldn't have bothered going out on a cold day. It was the weekend anyway and he'd normally sleep for the most part of the day. But somehow he had left without anyone noticing.
It was almost 10pm when Logan heard the front door of Stuart House opening and closing shortly after. He had stayed in the common room deciding that Julian couldn't slip past him here as long as he didn't fall asleep which was much harder to accomplish than he had thought because the lovely heat of the fire mixed with the darkness had almost lulled Logan to sleep.
He heard someone slowly climbing the steps of the staircase and moved a little so that he could see whoever was coming in. Although he would deny it when asked he had missed Julian all day. It was weird now that they were together. When he had found out about the crazy stalker something had shifted in him and he had realized how much he really cared for Julian. At first he had blamed that on their long friendship but there had been a nagging feeling in the back of his mind that this was much more.
After Julian had nearly been killed Logan had been the one to find the actor. Covered in blood and barely breathing and with Adam towering over him. Logan had attacked without hesitation. Adam was strong but Logan was furious and that gave him the advantage and in the end he had punched Adam so hard that he was unconscious. Logan had scrambled over to Julian whose eyes got wide once he saw who was there with him had tried to speak. Logan had had to lean in closer to understand his friend.
"Lo... you... you saved... me." His voice had been raspy and weak and it tore at Logan's heart all he had wanted was to wrap the smaller boy in his arms and kiss the pain away.
"You're gonna be alright Jules. You have to." Logan had whispered into Julian's ear pulling him closer.
"Lo... if...if anything happens..." Logan had cut him off.
"Nothing is going to happen. You'll be fine!"
"Lo... I-I-I love you..." With these words Julian had fallen into unconsciousness and left Logan to himself with all his feelings crashing onto him. He had placed a firm kiss on Julian's forehead and hoped that the ambulance would hurry.
Logan came back to reality as he heard loud steps walking into his direction. A lot had changed in the six months after he had found Julian. To most people nothing much had changed. Logan and Julian were still fighting and screaming at each other almost daily but whoever looked more closely at them would notice a change. Neither Logan nor Julian were big into P.D.A's so they had kept more too themselves. Derek knew of course. He had jumped out of his seat and yelled "Finally"! But apart from that no one really knew.
They didn't hide their relationship but they just weren't pushing it into people's faces. In the beginning Logan had thought that Julian wanted to keep it a secret because of his career but after asking the actor about it the answer he had gotten was. "Oh, I don't care what the media writes about me. I love you that's more important than anything. I'm just not that big on showing off I guess." And Logan had accepted it happily. He was sure that it would work out better that way because his last relationships were widely known in school and they didn't end so well.
Logan could hear whoever it was now walking towards the common room. The lights were all out except for a small lamp on one of the tables and the light from the burning fire. All Logan could make out from the person was a shape. But he'd know this shape everywhere. The way the person was moving had been burned into his mind.
He looked directly at the person and smirked. "And where have you been all day? Avoiding me? Hiding a secret lover?" Logan asked nonchalantly.
A low chuckle came from the other one while he kept on walking until the light hit him.
"So why would I be stupid enough to tell you if there were someone else? I know how possessive you can be, Lo." This time it was Logan's turn to chuckle. It was their little game they played. Testing each other. Throwing jokes around like before. Somehow they needed that. Trying to annoy the other one. But by now they knew each other too well to not notice what the other one was trying to do. For them it was just another way of showing affection. Another way of saying 'I love you'.
Logan sat up straighter and took in his boyfriend in front of him. The light coming from the fire hit him perfectly. Logan could see his delicate features and the way the firelight played on his face was pure perfection for him. His clothes were tight fitted and suited him perfectly. It took him a moment to notice the other boy shivering and looked back up to his face. Now he could see Julian's hair glistening in the light obviously wet.
He stood up quickly and walked up to Julian. Standing right in front of him he noticed that not only was his hair wet but his clothes as well.
"What have you been doing? You are all wet." Logan asked seriously.
"Walked around outside for a bit. Guess I forgot the time." Julian mumbled and shrugged.
Logan could see in Julian's eyes that something was definitely up. But he also knew him well enough to know that he'd probably have to work a bit to get it out of Julian. Logan stepped closer to his boyfriend and raised his hands to rest them against the lapel of his jacket. Just like he had thought it was soaked and ice cold. He swiftly moved his hands under the lapel and slid it off until it fell onto the floor.
Julian wore a dark blue sweater underneath and after finding it wet as well Logan moved his hands down to the hem and shoved it upwards.
"Lo, what are you doing? It's freezing I just want to take a shower and go to sleep." Logan thought for a moment. No that wouldn't work. So he started pulling on Julian's sweater again more insistent this time. When Julian didn't move to help him he looked sternly at him.
"Jules, trust me. Please?" Green eyes bore into brown ones. Logan pressed a chaste kiss to Julian's unresponsive lips and pulled back again still looking at him.
Somehow this had gotten Julian's attention and he lifted his arms so Logan could pull his sweater off and drop it on the floor as well. Julian shivered. Standing only in a t-shirt that was mostly wet as well. He wrapped his arms around him but a second later Logan's hands pried them open again. The blond boy looked down at his boyfriend and smiled. He loved being taller than Julian. Quickly he pulled the shirt off of his toned body only to throw it somewhere as well.
"Lo, what..." But Logan silenced him with a sweet kiss. Nothing demanding. Just a peck really. But it meant so much more in this moment.
Logan dropped his hands to Julian's button fly and started unbuttoning his wet jeans as well. Slowly he shoved them down as far as he could before he dropped to his knees to push them down the rest of the way. Julian stood there bewildered. He didn't know what was going on. Logan was always sweet but somehow he was even more attentive today. He looked down when he felt Logan tap against his right calf, symbolizing him to lift up his foot. Logan quickly pulled the pants over his foot and tapped against his left calf. Julian had a bit more trouble to balance himself this time and had to support himself with one hand on Logan's head. The other boy had pulled of Julian's pants and had thrown it onto the pile with the rest of his clothing.
Logan stood up and looked at Julian. "If you messed up my hair you'll pay for it." He snarled.
Julian just ignored the comment and stepped closer to Logan. He wrapped his arms around Logan's neck and pulled him down into a lazy kiss. When Logan responded he moved his hands up into Logan's hair and ruffled it. Logan pulled back with a playful smile on his lips.
"You'll pay for that later, Larson." He growled before pushing Julian over to the couch and made him sit. Logan looked around until he found what he was looking for, strode over to another couch and took the thick blanket that was lying on it. He turned around only to see that Julian had cowered into one corner, his knees pulled up to his chest and his arms around his legs. He looked so small and something was obviously troubling him.
Logan walked back to Julian and wrapped the thick blanket around him before shedding his own clothes until he was only in his boxer shorts as well. When he put a hand onto Julian's knee over the blanket the other boy looked up at him, confused.
"Lo, what..." But again Logan bent down and pressed a chaste kiss to Julian's lips.
He sat down in the other corner of the couch and pulled the blanket and Julian between his legs so that Julian's back rested on his chest. He tucked the blanket in place around them and then slid one arm under the blanket and around Julian's chest while his other hand was absentmindedly playing with Julian's brown hair.
They sat like that for a few minutes and Logan felt Julian warming up slowly. He enjoyed having Julian in his arms. It always felt so right and he always asked himself how he hadn't seen it earlier. This was perfect. Julian was all he had ever needed. He leaned forward to whisper into Julian's ear.
"I missed you today." Julian shifted his head a little so that his temple was resting against Logan's cheek. For a few seconds he said nothing.
"Sorry... I-I just... I needed to be alone today." Logan was surprised about the answer. What was so special about this day? Had he forgotten their anniversary or something? No the official date of getting together was in a few weeks. He thought for a few minutes until it hit him. It was exactly six months since...
He curled his arm harder around Julian pulling him closer. Julian seemed to realize that Logan had understood.
"It's been six months today. Six months since I almost died, Lo..." Logan tried to pull Julian in even closer. He heard the pain in Julian's voice but didn't know how to answer this or if this even needed an answer.
"I-I-I know it's really stupid to still be afraid but I can't help it." Logan's heart was constricting. He had known that Julian was still scared. How could he not notice him waking up almost every night when they shared a bed most nights? All he wanted was for Julian to know that he was safe. Adam had been locked up for everything he had done to him and had already been tried. He wouldn't get out until he was around 60. Julian had no reason to be afraid.
"Jules...," he whispered and tightened his hold on him even more. "He can't hurt you anymore. I promise. I'll always be here to protect you. Like I was there that night. Nothing will ever happen to you. Trust me." He pressed a soft kiss to Julian's temple willing him to understand.
Minutes ticked by and the two boys just sat there in silence before Logan couldn't take it any longer. He shifted his hold on Julian and moved him a bit to the side so he could look him in the eyes.
"Jules, I know this is hard but we have to move on. I know it's scary and I know that I probably can't understand what you are feeling but I need you to know that you'll always be safe with me." Logan searched Julian's face for some kind of response but couldn't find one. Changing his tactic he leaned his forehead against Julian's and breathed in everything that was so truly Julian.
"You know that despite everything that happened it ended well. It opened my eyes. I had been so blind before but when I thought I would lose you everything was so clear. Jules, I love you. That's all I need you to know. I'll always be here for you. With me you don't have to be afraid."
Julian stared at his boyfriend, not used to such big declarations of love. A small smile tucked at his lips.
"I know, Lo and I love you too, you know that. It's just everything happened so fast back then. I just... I don't even know why I am scared. I was walking around outside asking myself why I was scared but at the same time I wondered how I could walk outside on my own. I mean it happened right here. Under everyone's nose and you were the only one who noticed." Julian lifted one hand and cupped Logan's cheek. He slowly moved forward and pressed a quick kiss to Logan's lips, not lingering.
"I-I.. Logan, I need to say something. Something important, so don't interrupt me, okay?" Julian waited for his answer so Logan simply nodded.
"Without you everything would have ended. I mean. If you hadn't found me I wouldn't be here. Without you I would be dead today. I feel so much safer knowing that you are around." Logan was a little bit shocked at Julian's so very earnest words. They had never talked about it like that. But he didn't interrupt Julian because he knew that the actor needed to get it out. "You saved my freaking life, Lo. I-I-I mean not only in the actual way but also when you kissed me for the first time. I had given up on that completely but you made everything better. I love you and I think what I wanna say with all this rambling is: Thank you for saving my life."
Julian looked up at Logan through his eyelashes unsure of how the blond would take all this. Logan looked down at his boyfriend. Julian had never looked more beautiful to him than right now. He seemed so vulnerable and unsure of himself. It was the complete opposite of what Logan was used to see in him. The simple fact that Julian felt comfortable enough to show him this side meant more than words could describe.
"I think I am just as happy that I found you. Not only on that night but that I finally saw you for who you are. And to think that I would have to find someone else to fight with. That would be terribly hard. There is no one around who could rival you as a diva. " Logan smirked down at the boy he loved. He was joking and both of them knew that but they also knew that this would always be the way they were. They'd never be able to stick to sappy romantic without making jokes.
"Because you are so low maintenance, Wright. You are even harder to keep happy than I am." Julian laughed. "But that's why I love you." With that he pressed his lips to Logan's. Not quite chaste but not a needy kiss either. It was a loving one. One that said everything that needed to be said. Logan wrapped his arms around Julian and held him closer against him. They weren't in a hurry tonight. Tonight was special. Tonight was about feeling safe with each other.
Logan slowly leaned back and pulled Julian on top of him. Neither one wanted to break the kiss. Julian settled against Logan's chest one leg in between Logan's and one hand wound into his blond hair. Julian ran his tongue over Logan's bottom lip begging for entrance that was granted when Logan opened his mouth to let him in. Tongues were not battling for dominance but merely touching each other, dancing together, caressing each other. Everything was slow and loving. It was so much more intense than anything they had done in the past couple of months.
Logan wondered how a simple kiss can feel so much more passionate than anything else. It was the first step for many things that had happened in the past. Somehow both of them were rather insatiable when it came to sex but this right here: just kissing and enjoying being together was something new.
Julian was the one to break the kiss when he propped himself up on his arms to look at Logan. Deep brown eyes colliding with pale green ones. They were so familiar but still there was something new in them. Julian couldn't quite put his finger on what it was but it didn't matter because he knew that it was something wonderful. He felt save with Logan. Safer than he had felt ever in his life. He had the boy he loved and who loved him back. With this knowledge nothing seemed so scary any more.
Pressing one last kiss to Logan's lips Julian laid his head down on Logan's chest and closed his eyes. Logan tucked the blanket tighter around them and pressed one last kiss into Julian's hair before closing his eyes as well. Nothing else mattered because they were together and safe.
The next morning Logan was the first to wake up. More like he was awoken by voices around him. For a second he was confused about his surroundings but then the events of last night came back. He opened one eye to see most people of Stuart House standing around them watching curiously. Logan groaned.
"Jules..." he whispered into the smaller boy's ear. "Jules, you should wake up. We have an audience."
Julian blinked open one eye. "What the hell, Lo. It's way too early for this..." Julian cut himself off when he opened his eyes completely and saw his classmates standing around them. Derek stood directly in front of them smirking down at his two best friends.
Julian looked up at Logan and shrugged. "Guess the cat is out of the bag."
Logan just laughed. Glad that it didn't freak Julian out. They knew that most Stuarts would keep their secret. But even if it became widely known somehow; Logan couldn't care less and since Julian didn't seem that upset either he was sure that the actor didn't really mind.
Because as long as they were together nothing bad could happen.