Hoagie's POV

A strange world we live in. So many questions,so little answers. Taking a bite out of Nurse Claiborne's Apple Crumbles, I realize just how many answers we get. Pink eye crust?Eye crust?Nah. How did she even make these things,anyways? Eye crust as a topping? Blugh. McClintock High School was a safe haven for me, only when I'm in my office. Yes,I sit here everyday just waiting for some action. Despite all of the years since KND, we all kept in touch with each other. Kuki and Wally admitted their love. Psh,young puppy love,if you ask me. You'll never see me going crazy over a girl like that. That is until she walked in.

She was like a witch,a hott witch. Her hat always landed on my head, making her that hot witch. Angry,she was, at my good looks, probably jealous. Bang! Yeah,she was angry at my good looks. "Hey,whatcha do that for?" "Boy,get back to class. is about to have a fit." Yeah ,she yells at me a lot-and smacks me with her hat a lot .I sat there,just taking in 's dark,luscious features. She examined the room,shaking her head. A fool,she calls me, a complete fool.

Abby's POV

Janitor's Closet? Hoagie's a fool. A complete and utter fool. Can't he spend most of his time in a tree house,instead of a closet? was going to kill me if I don't bring him back soon.I don't know why,though. I glanced at the clock above the boy's head. 11:21. 's class ended at 11:30. I sighed. Hoagie's eyes were planted on me and I was about ready to smack him again. It became a tradition for me to do such a thing to foolish remarks from boys. Don't get me wrong, Abby isn't close to being another Fanny. Fanny always hid her girlish self by acting sexist. Like myself, I hide who I have feelings for. Abby makes sure that the boy thinks that she hates them. I don't know why,maybe it's just a girl thing. Then again,maybe a guy thing , too,considering that Wally does the same thing with Kuki-still.

Hoagie was beautiful. Skinny,average height,and that same personality from when we were kids.I think maybe,just maybe that I had a crush on him. Okay,who is Numbuh five fooling? I love this kid. Well,not literally. Abby just has a small crush on him.

"Stop starring,fool."

He just chuckled, " 'ever you say,Abby." His head tilted some, then he turned to face the wall.

I sighed, "Get to class."

The clock ticked away and we glanced at the time.

"Oh,come on, Abs. I need to finish these Apple Crumbles and get some detective work done here," he complained.

"Hoagie, jus' get ya butt outta here. Yo already missed everything interesting in history class, anyways."

His googles slipped off his eyes, "Then why not miss all of it?"

I promise you who is reading this, that Hoagie is a total hotti-uh-dweeb.

Hoagie's POV

I couldn't help but notice how she seemed to sweat like a pig. Did I just say that? Ignore that please. She just seemed concerned. Concerned like a mother who is letting her child go out on his or her first date. Abby didn't want me to get into trouble. She never wanted any one of our crew to get into trouble. She's always been that way. Caring, like a mother or sister. Speaking of sisters, Cree- ugh- is so ugly now. What was I thinking when I was ten? Really, what was I thinking when I was ten?

"Hoagie? Where you even listening to what I just said?"

"Huh?" I had to get out of my daze. I was thinking about everything but school.

Abby placed her hands atop of my desk. She cocked her head to the right and looked straight into my eyes. There was a good amount of silence between us. Here eyes were like cocoa butter; her eyes were dark, but smooth, but a light tint within them. She took my breath away. She looked into my own eyes since my goggles had slipped off of my face. "What's with you and those apple crumbles? You're such a dweeb, Numbuh Two." "Hey, codenames are strictly prohibited during school, Ms. Ex-Soopreme Commander," I corrected her. She laughed, "Wanna go make fun of squirt as he tries out for soccer this afternoon?" I didn't respond and neither did she.

Our face was inches close. I think we were just both shocked at how much have changed over the years. Yesterday, we were children on the playground. She was a Kids Next Door operative, and I was just a kid who still played with toy airplanes(which are still awesome, by the way). Today, we're seventeen and we're just trying to get by in life. My hand, however, interrupted the intense stares between us. I moved my hand towards the plate of Apple Crumbles, attempting to keep my eyes still on her. Her hand clasped above mine once it reached the apple crumble.

"Hoagie, how long have we known each other and how many things have you said that Abby can never unhear?" I chuckled a little, though she kept a straight face. It came like a 90 MPH wind. Her lips touched mine gently. It was a brief second. Some may not consider it a real kissed, but our lips touched. The were on top of each other. Our lips, which we speak words through, touched. Eek! I spoke up once our eyes were opened, "I lost count. Does this ring a bell, 'I might need to use a spatula to get my underwear off'?" I realized I couldn't necessarily remember the exact quote but she immediately remembered that one mission. She clasped her hands on her face and backed away once I said that. "Did ya really jus' go there, Hoagie? Ugh." "What? What I do?" She started laughing and I realized that she was now walking back over to my desk.

She sat on top of the desk. Her face was tilted towards where I can see her figure. We just looked at each other recollecting past times with no words being spoken. The bell rang and slowly, but surely, classroom doors where being opened. The hallway outside of the closet was being filled with hormones. Students rushed around and quick footsteps seemed to approach my very own office. Abby spoke up, "You missed Mrs. Remington's class, fool." "So did you," I stated, making her realize that she might not be able to become valedictorian for missing just around ten minutes of class.

"Shut the fuck up, Hoags." She leaped off of the desk and I came around to grab her arm before the reached the door. "Abby, I'm sorry." The girl who I knew since I was six kissed me endlessly on the lips. Her hands were gripped around my neck. That's when I knew she came here for a reason. She didn't want to tell me something, she needed to tell me something. In a quick moment, I pulled her away and told her, "Damn it, I love you," in my sexy voice. She kicked me in the shin. "What was that for?" "For waitin' so long tell Abby." She grabbed me back into a soft kiss that was not raunchy but romantic.

The door opened. We didn't realize it. "Hey, Hoagie-" Nigel stopped dead in his tracks as his eyes came to the left of the closet where Abby and I stood in a pose that only meant one thing. We stopped our soft, few second kiss and turned to him, blush rising up on our checks. "Okay...I need a detective to help me find my khaki messenger bag, but I see that certain detective, who happens to be my best friend, is busywith another one my best friends. So, I guess I'll go to Joe Baloka's detective service to help me find my backpack, but he couldn't help me, because I surely remember putting it in here this morning when we were having root beer. So, I guess I should just leave now..."

"No,no...You see, we were just leaving, " I said.

"Oh," Nigel smiled.

"Yeah, just leaving. He he he. See you around, sport," Abby gestured towards the door.

"Okay, okay. I'll see you guys at the tree house. Rachel, Kuki, Wally, and everyone else, let's go in my awesome sports car; we're skipping our next few classes. "

Abby and I sighed, relief that he exited the door. "Oh, you know what. I forgot something. My backpack." Before you know it, Nigel was back in the room. He turned to the right of the closet and picked up his khaki messenger bag that was laying on a dirty old box. The thing is, Rachel came behind Nigel into the room. "Come on, Nigel. Get your backpack, and let's go to moonbase. Don't let me make this a direct order." Kuki followed behind, "Can we go now? I can't miss Rainbow Monkeys in Orange County today. Also, we need to be back at school in time for Wally's soccer tryout. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go." Everyone else seemed to pour in behind. Wally, Bartie, Patton, Fanny, Virgina, Sonya, Lee, and my little brother, Tommy.

Nigel-being the natural leader- took charge and settled everyone down. "Okay, let's all go to our next class." Everyone's voice seemed to uprise in a chorus of no's. They all made a decision, though, and walked out of the office, with Nigel being the last one out of our group. Abby looked at me, " Dang, our friends are crazy, but there's one of us that seems to keep everyone in line." "Who? Nigel? Rachel? Wally? Yeah, stupid response. You? Who is it?" "No, silly, it's you and your jokes." A kiss planted softly on my lips. I love her.

Nigel poked his head in and whistled. We both jumped. "Dude!" we both cried in unison. "You love birds coming or not?" Abby looked at me, "Come on, Hoagie, I already missed ten minutes of Mrs. Remington's class and probably three minutes of Mr. Dooely's AP English class. We're coming, Nigel." Rachel's voice came, " Well, good, because now we need a few more couples of our group to get together." "Hey!" we seemed to be talking simultaneously a lot since our first kiss. We noticed that the entire gang was now spieing on us. Nigel spoke quietly, "To the road." Abby led the way to the closet door as we were the last ones out. She turned around right when were about to exit. Her eyes sparkled as she spoke in a whisper, " Your breath tastes like Apple Crumbles." She kissed me and to this day, Apple Crumbles will always stay alive.

Author's Note: Huzzah! The worst/best 2x5 fan fic is complete. I have to admit that Abby/Hoagie are probably my favorite couple now. 1x362 is in second place. Though, 1x362 had been my favorite couple for the longest time, 2x5 seemed to have taken over just recently in the past few ten or so months. I'm not proud how this fic turned out, but I felt like I had to submit something this week since Thanksgiving is just around the river bend. :) Yeah, review, and I'll be taking requests for oneshots, but they may be placed on hold... ha. Thank you for reading this crappy oneshot, and you may now fav and/or review.