What will it take for someone to understand all of my pain?
How long will it take for someone to notice that I am slowly dying on the inside?
Why would they just look at me and not help?
Where will I go when all of this is over?
When will I finally reach my limit?
These were the questions that I asked myself every single day until I met Magnus.
Magnus was the only one that brought me joy in life.
He was the only one that seemed to care.
He was the only one who bothered to stop and listen to me.
I know exactly where I would be if it wasn't for him.
If it wasn't for Magnus I wouldn't be here to tell you my story.
My childhood was very harsh and demanding as a Shadowhunter I was required to be training at a young age.
To make matters worse I was never the apple of my fathers' eye, which would be Jace, who we practically adopted when his parents died.
All my life I've known nothing but harsh training 24/7 with anything weapon imaginable for the Shadowhunting world.
To be honest I really wish that I was someone else at times.
Whenever I go on a hunt and we pass through Mundane Brooklyn, I get jealous at all those lucky mundanes who can just do whatever. Now I'm not saying I want to be a mundane, because that would be a really boring and lame life, but I just want to be able to hang out and relax more then I get to.
Every since I met Magnus my entire perspective of who I wanted to be changed. He made me see that I was special in my own way and made me feel loved, something I never really felt before. The one thing in my entire life that I was yearning for happened when I met Magnus. Sure I at first I thought he was quite queer, but now I love every single thing about him.
Frankily I don't care what my father think about Magnus and I because he is the only one who understands me and I will fight to protect him. I'm sick and tired of my father telling what is wrong and right, that may have worked when I was younger, but now I can make my own decisions and I will. If that means that I love a Downworlder more than any Shadowhunter or Mundane, that's what it means. I'm just sick and tired of being told what is wrong and right because it's my life and I will do what I want to.
" Alec, darling please stop swimming in your thoughts again, besides I'm tired and I would like it if all my lights were turned off." I heard from the back bedroom.
Well I guess this is it, besides Magnus isn't very pretty when he doesn't get his required ten hours of beauty sleep.
" ALEC! NOW!"
" I'M COMING!"
Oh well till next time I suppose.