Back Story
Summary: Castle is there for the story. This "Back-Story" fills the void between Beckett's rookie days and becoming a detective.
Author's Note: Everything about vice procedure was made up. Heed the T rating because of topics from Beckett's days working vice. No smut or graphic details but the themes are adult.
Setting: 3rd season (Montgomery is captain.) No spoilers. Slightly AU because Josh is out of the picture and Martha's acting school is up and running. Knockout (3rd season finale) hasn't happened yet.
The usual disclaimer: All credit and gratitude is given to Andrew Marlowe who allows us to play with his creation. Appreciation to the cast for their inspiration and being such wonderful people outside their characters.
Dedication: Dedicated to those who protect and serve and make a stand against evil. I don't know how you do it, but you have my gratitude.
I Sleep with a Gun
The case closed in the darkest hours of the night. The stakeout paid off, but not until the bars closed and the dregs of society staggered back to their holes to sleep away the despondence. Beckett gave Ryan and Esposito the primary spot to watch, and they got to arrest Emmanuel Daniels for murder. Hopefully the gun he carried would be a match to the murder of the young man who got in debt too deep with the bookie. Even if it didn't, they had enough evidence to put him away.
Detective Kate Beckett made a deal with the guys that they did the bust and then got to sleep in. She'd do the paperwork and cover until noon. She tried to bargain with her partner to go home hours earlier, but he claimed the opportunity of being confined in a car with her was better than being asleep in bed on Turkish sheets of decadent softness. It was further proof something was really very wrong with Richard Castle.
The author talked endlessly to pass the time. In the process he weaseled out of her a few previously unknown tidbits, and he made her smile with his humor. He shared a few funny stories about fans, and she got a few hints about how much fun he had being a playboy. He kept up the conversation to keep her awake because their coffee ran out hours ago.
"Do you miss your glory days?" she asked with a smirk as they drove towards her apartment.
"Are you implying I am past my prime?" His mock indignation was convincing.
"You have an unattractive alternative before you. Either admit you don't behave that way because of physical aging, or admit you don't want to act that way because you've mentally aged." She loved trapping him and seeing which way he'd go.
"My dear detective, I believe my glory days are still ahead of me. I will act with lusty abandon, but it will be with one lucky woman, and I am waiting to see if there is a woman extraordinary enough to handle me for the rest of my days." He wiggled his eyebrows and a grin lit up his features.
Beckett was laughing so hard she almost missed a turn. "You are so richly entertaining! Are you sure you want to put up with more of my abuse and crash on my couch instead of going home now?"
He nodded, happy to have the chance to spend as much time with her as possible. He planned to make her breakfast in the morning. "It is too late to have any chance of finding a cab and there is no way I am letting you drive past your apartment to take me home. Now if you want to spend the rest of the night at my loft instead…" He left the innuendo hanging.
"I really don't think you want Martha having any more false hopes about why I keep coming around." She hit close to home with her rebuttal.
"Hey, there is no such thing as false hope. All hope is good by definition." True to form, the author responded to the oxymoron but not the larger issue.
Her response was spared by a timely arrival at her apartment. She made the conversation get practical. "Here is a blanket and pillow. Remember, Castle, I sleep with a gun." It was a running joke.
He gave a charming smile and his standard retort, "Rest well, detective. I am here to protect you."
They both smiled and parted for the night. She retreated to her bedroom and closed the door. He spread out his blanket on the couch.
Castle wasn't ready to fall asleep just yet. He slept late this morning, but he knew how exhausted Beckett was. He kept quiet but wanted to check out her books. The woman had an infuriating way of staying well read, and he found their taste in literature compatible. He cursed at the small noises he made as he selected a title from her collection and settled down on the couch to speed read.
He paused and listened. Only 20 minutes had passed since he began the book, but a small sound distracted him. He got up and listened at her bedroom door. A muffled sob? It came again, louder this time. No, it was more like a cry for help… Castle quietly opened the door and saw Beckett, still dressed in black, asleep on top her covers. She was in the middle of a night terror.
The light from the other room was enough to make Beckett's eyes fly open as she instinctively grabbed for her weapon. She pointed it at the intruder without thinking.
"Sorry Beckett, I shouldn't have opened your door but…"
"Shut up! I vowed if I ever saw you again, I'd send you straight to hell, Danny Manny." Beckett's voice was cold and low.
"Whoa, Kate! It's me: Castle." He realized the light coming from behind him put his face into a shadow.
"Don't move or I will kill you. Hands over your head." She kept her aim steady and never moved from the bed.
Her exhaustion was keeping her half asleep. Castle raised his voice. "Detective Beckett, snap out of it! It's me, your plucky sidekick. Everything is ok. I'm Richard Castle, your devoted partner." He kept his hands raised and stood very still even as he saw the realization finally dawn on Beckett's face.
"Oh God!" She checked to make sure the safety was on and put the firearm down quickly, still staring at Castle who had his hands in the air. The horror of the situation forced her into moving. She rushed to him and physically pulled his arms back to his sides. "Rick, I'm so sorry…" She threw her arms around him and apologized again.
Castle was taken back by the incident, but even more so by how upset Beckett was. Her voice was raspy. Tears threatened to spill from those beautiful green eyes and she refused to meet his gaze. Castle was starting to feel really bad for her. "Hey, it's ok. You warned me you sleep with a gun." He wrapped his arms around her.
"That's no excuse. I should never have reacted like that. You never point a weapon where you aren't in total control! Rick, I'll never forgive myself for this." She buried her head against him, drinking in his presence as if she would never see him again.
"Hey, I should never have come into your room. This is my fault." He tried to comfort her by downplaying the incident.
Beckett shook her head and refused to look at him. "This is entirely my fault. I know better than to let you be here."
He wanted to make sure he heard correctly. "It is me specifically that shouldn't be here?" It was a veiled question that other men had been with her, but she didn't want him here? Castle was scared for the first time. His heart was in more danger than his body had ever faced.
She belatedly realized how it sounded. "I should never have let you wonder around out there. I know what you're like. I am obviously too tired to be responsible with a loaded gun."
Whether she referred to the actual firearm or the author was unclear. This was the kind of thing that made Beckett put up walls and he wanted to counter it. "You can make it up to me. Let me have the other side of the bed and then I won't have to break into your room. I promise there won't be any funny business."
She searched his face for a quick minute and then nodded. Without another word she led him into the room and crawled back in bed.
She gave in way too easy and Castle followed fully intending on staying on the far side of the mattress. He needed to show her he was worthy of a greater presence in her life. When he settled down and never touched her, she rolled away leaving her back to him. All his resolve went out the window when he heard an involuntary sniffle.
He scooted over to her side of the bed and hoped his sophomoric humor would help. "I've trapped you and now I am trying to figure out what to do with you. Any suggestions?" She didn't answer so Rick put arm over her and brushed her cheek. As expected, it was wet from a tear. Her torment distracted him from the warmth and scent of being so close to her. This isn't how he wanted to end up in Beckett's bed.
He whispered to her. "I burst into your room and you grabbed your weapon to defend yourself. It's not a tragedy that you didn't instantly distinguish between friend and foe."
"It is a tragedy and could have been so much worse." She whispered the words and kept her back towards him.
"I'm the writer who is supposed to make up the what-if scenarios. Stop beating yourself up and please stop acting like I am a reminder of a dirty little secret you want to forget. I can guess how your mind is working. In the morning you'll start slowly pushing me away and I'll never be this close to you again. You are exhausted. Please just sleep."
He stroked her arm and kissed the top of her head before he scooted back to the center of the bed. Beckett was strong willed, and she was going to do what she wanted no matter what he said, did, or didn't do. After a few minutes she rolled over close to him. Her wordless action spoke for her. He tried to put her at ease, "Remember, it's my job to protect you even when you're sleeping."
She may have rolled her eyes, but she relaxed as he embraced her.
Castle held her tenderly. No caresses. No kisses. No distractions from the monumental shift in their non-existent romance. He knew Kate was giving him an invitation to get away with anything. He hoped she was pleasantly surprised by his intent. What he wanted to give her was something she probably hadn't experienced since she was a little girl. He wanted to be her nightlight. He wanted her to sleep peacefully. "Rest well, detective," he whispered.
He stayed awake as long as possible to watch over her. This was the deeper test of Beckett's trust. It was harder for her to mask her vulnerabilities while she slept. Previous boyfriends so rarely spent an entire night with her that exhaustion, whether caused by schedules or sex, meant that they fell asleep and left her alone even if their limbs were entwined. Falling asleep while Richard Castle watched over her required a special kind of trust. It remained to be seen if creepy stares during the day turned into happy endings behind closed eyelids.