A hundred-worder in which Lex struggles with an old Luthor Family "curse"… Dedicated to my fabulous friend, Rin Sakaguchi, for poking and prodding until I typed it. Love her muchly. Hope you enjoy it.
It's common in my family, really. I mean, everyone in the line has had their own personal dementia, severe or not. I swear, if you traced the line back enough, there had to be a Gypsy Curse of some sort placed on the Luthor family. Oh, dad would just love to beat the power-driven romanticism out of that story, so I can't prove it since I have not heard it, but it explains a lot. I had my most obvious one at one point. One that was rather bad, and I know who I earned it from. My very own 'Daddy Dearest'…
I benefited from it at first. I mean, manipulation is possibly the best "depravity" a businessman can suffer from in the end, I suppose. It's what's made my dad so successful. It's what kept me alive under his parental direction. And I don't say that with any sort of light heart. I was a jackass when I was younger. Using my talents of Power and mess with people, for fun or to get what I wanted. It was kind of sick, now that I look back on it. I swallowed people whole, even as a pre-teen.
However, I did rather realize this around the time I turned 16 and started rebelling against Dad. You know, that age you hit when you just don't want to be like The Man any more. I was sick of doing what he told me to, and I was particularly tired of being just like him. I saw how much I hated that he used people for his own benefit and it wasn't long before I saw that I did exactly the same thing. Bad habits are dropped easier when you can truly see how disgusting they are.
Well, I quickly learned that a vice you're born with is hard to be rid of. I somewhat pitied Dad, because he never learned that it was a bad thing, I guess. I decided that if used my frailty in misusing humanity and turned it into a strength, it would be of better use. I could benefit both myself and the people around me. I found ways to fund small groups who looked to do good, but couldn't find the money to do so. In the end, it did help me with returns, publicity, helping out my medical condition. None of that was unintentional, though it wasn't wholly intentional either.
Once I had worked that around, I found the Luther Family Curse. Sure, it's mixed. You get fame and power and money in the end, but to get it all, you DO have possess some kind of… well… wickedness. It's easy to ignore when you're helping people. It's great to think you're over it when you're helping other people. But, a curse is a curse, and it runs in my genes. Something I can never be rid of. So, because I cheated out and found a way to use my original sin for good, it gave me another to deal with.
I don't know… I don't think it's considered pedophilia? That's more reserved for the creepy, middle aged man lurking by playgrounds and messing with 5 year olds, if you ask me. Maybe that definition is just my way of justifying my feelings. But, still, it's not as if I would allow myself to dip that low. Pedophilia is nonconsensual and a youthful innocence ruined and I would never force a love to the humiliation of being completely… er… overcome. That was something an ancient Luthor would do, and that is certainly not my Deadly Sin. Besides, 16's consensual in many countries…
Perhaps it's the fact that it's a he? I mean, that would be quite the slap in the face to Dad, huh? No more little Luthor Vikings laying waste and plundering the business world. He'd maybe even disown me, if it wouldn't cause a big public deal. Maybe it's a curse of shame this time. Something I have to live with quietly and hide from. Especially from Him; no, not Dad. Him. The one I can't tell, in particular. I can help him and love him and take care of his happiness, but I can't tell him. No particular reason other than outright rejection, though that wouldn't be so bad. But to have him never talk to me again, that would really be the fruit of the curse.
To no longer hear his voice or be able to see the bright gleam in his beautiful eyes whenever I hand him the tickets to whatever concert he desires to take lucky Llana to… To not enjoy his friendship. Not to use my old vice and manipulate him just a bit. Not to simply even be able to dream of the one day when maybe we could share a kiss. Sure, it's not going to happen anyway, but it's nice to dream.
So I can just sit here and dream, can't I? And… maybe… someday… he'll see. And the damnation will just have to come up with another sin for me to find penitence for. Bet it hasn't found a Luthor as determined as me.
Hehh… You know what? I can just hear that spiteful old Gypsy cackling…