"Love, she thought, must come suddenly, with great outbursts and lightnings,-a hurricane of the skies, which falls upon life, revolutionises it, roots up the will like a leaf, and sweeps the whole heart into the abyss." ~ Gustave Flaubert, 'Madame Bovary'
It was bright and sunny as they walked.
The perfect day.
Alex wasn't sure what exactly they were doing, but this was what they'd been doing all week. He'd seemed almost distant and that was worrying her. It was almost like he was shut down inside, but she didn't understand why. They'd been getting on fine and she thought they'd been making some progress in their relationship. They were still wearing the rings and they were taking things slowly, but she didn't think that that was a bad thing. He hadn't said anything differently and had seemed nothing more than understanding. So, she didn't understand his silence or his distance this morning. He looked exhausted, but she didn't think that would keep him from talking to her.
"Is something wrong with your coffee?" Alex finally asked.
The walk of silence was killing her.
Max seemed to snap out of whatever was distracting him or distancing him. Whatever it was and he looked at her in confusion. "No."
"Well, something's on your mind," she told him as she raised her eyebrows at him. She reached out, her hand on his arm, and Alex purposely stopped him. "Talk to me."
They were supposed to be able to talk to each other.
"Alex," he whispered, almost helplessly. He was suddenly looking around before he took her hand and pulled her in the direction of a bench. Max sat down first and looked down at his cup of coffee for a full minute like he didn't understand what it was.
Whatever was on his mind, it had Max out of sorts. It wasn't like him to just tell her. He'd told her plenty of times that he couldn't stop thinking about her or that he was having a hard time because of what had happened. How was this different? She knew that she had people to talk to and he had, well, her. That didn't mean that he stopped knowing how to talk to her. She stared at him and slowly sat down next to him.
Alex went to open her mouth, to tell him to spill it already, but she closed her mouth and instead covered his hand with hers. She waited, in silence, and just hoped that he'd talk. She had to go to work and J'onn would be expecting her...but this was important too. J'onn could start working on Lucy's training without her (after all, it wasn't like the Army hadn't trained her at all and they'd already been going at it for a couple of weeks now).
They were both just quiet and Alex occasionally sipped her coffee as she watched the people going past them. She glanced at her watch here and there, she was just waiting for the text wondering if she was still alive. She'd been home for a month now and J'onn was still in overprotective mode...or maybe he'd always been like that and ever since things had happened she'd just really realized that he had that mode when it came to her.
"You have work," Max whispered.
She looked over at him as she squeezed his hand. A sad smile graced her lips and she was quiet for a moment. Sometimes, it was better to let the silence speak, but he was also right. Alex really needed to go, but at the same time she wanted to be there for him. "So do you…"
"I won't be able to work with this in my head…"
"So, talk to me," Alex urged gently and sincerely. She scooted closer to him until their hips touched, set her empty coffee cup at her feet, her arm wrapped around him, and she pressed a kiss to his temple. "I'm here."
"I don't know how you'll take it."
That had her worried.
"So, just tell me."
"Alex-"
She looked right at him, one arm still wrapped around him while her other hand squeezed the hand she held. Alex wasn't going anywhere until he told her what was going on, otherwise she'd worry all day and that just wasn't going to be good for anyone. "Tell me."
"Do you trust me?"
"Yes," she said slowly.
And she did.
"Don't go into work today."
"Max-"
"Please."
"Why? You just-"
"I need to show you something," Max finally blurted out. "I can't just tell you, I need to show you…"
Alex just stared at him. He was definitely out of sorts and not himself. "Okay, let me check in...see if it's going to be a problem."
J'onn would let her, she knew that.
That didn't mean that she wasn't going to call in and talk to him. He'd worry and he'd likely want to see or hear her to make sure she was okay. Alex patted his hand before getting up. "I'll be right back, don't go anywhere." As she moved away from him, she kept looking back to make sure he didn't go anywhere. She was more worried about how he was acting than anything else. How she was going to explain this to J'onn was another, but he would understand. Alex just felt weird calling in and basically taking the day off because Maxwell Lord was acting weird and needed to show her something.
"Hey," she said when he picked up.
"Where are you?"
"It's a long story, but Max has been acting weird and I just couldn't leave him," she tried to explain quickly before glancing over to check that Max hadn't moved from the bench. "I don't know if he's snapping or what...all I know is that I don't feel right leaving him alone."
"Bring him in with you."
A smile brightened her. "You miss me that much already?"
"I worry about you."
"I know, but today is my day to worry about him," Alex explained. "I have you, Kara, and my mom...and he only has me. He says he needs to show me something...so, I just want to take the day off to make sure he doesn't do something stupid and possibly force him to sleep."
"Okay."
"You going to survive training without me?"
"Kara's assisting at the moment," J'onn informed her. "Apparently Cat's on some last minute retreat."
"I hope you at least put on the Kryptonite emitter," Alex reminded. She was fairly sure that sometimes he forgot because it was an even sparing match for him against Kara without the emitter on.
"It's on."
"Well, at least there won't be death by sparring to fill out."
"Hopefully," he mumbled all too seriously. There was a sigh. "Call me if you need anything. Just be careful, Alex...and take care of yourself."
"I will," Alex promised. "Talk to you later."
Slipping the phone into her back pocket, she turned to look at Max. He looked lost. Alex moved over to where he was and extended her hand to him. "Ready?" It took a moment for Max to take her hand and look up at her, but there was a light in him when he finally did.
Max drove, which Alex didn't really think was the best plan, but he'd been determined. So, the entire drive, she'd focused on him. If she'd seen any indication that something was wrong, she was ready to take the wheel. When they came to a final stop, however, Alex realized that she hadn't been paying attention to where they were going.
Airport.
A private one.
She got out with Max and stared at his private jet sitting there. She'd been so consumed and focused on Max and his state of mind that she hadn't even realized where they were going, if-
"I told them to deliver the files here," Max explained matter of factly and almost trance-like as he walked with purpose and his nerves almost seemed to drop away.
Alex just walked him, confused and concerned. "What files?" she just blurted still looking around. It wasn't like she didn't know about this private airport, she did. She'd been there before for DEO business. She just didn't understand what they were doing there. Max didn't stop or answer her, though, he just headed up the steps and into his jet.
Frustrated and confused, Alex sighed before following him a moment later. When she got in the jet, she immediately sought out Max who was pouring himself a drink. "Max, what files? Why are we here? What aren't you telling me?"
Something was going on.
"You wouldn't have believed me."
"Believe you about what?"
Max took a long drink before setting the glass down and turning his full attention to her. He was still absolutely exhausted and out of it. She could tell that. He still didn't seem right. It was worrying her, but there was so much irritation that was coursing through her now because he wasn't telling her what was going on. Alex hated being left out, she knew it was a control thing...but damn it, she liked being in control and informed.
He took a step towards her and cupped her face in his hands. "I've been so happy and all I've wanted was to give you something…"
Alex blinked, he wasn't clearing anything up and she wondered if he realized that. "Max, you don't have to give me anything… I don't understand-"
"I searched for you," he explained. "I thought it would give me the answers you already had, but I was surprised when they actually yielding some unexpected results…"
"Searched...for me?"
He wasn't making sense.
The loud sound to her left caught her attention and she realized that the door to the jet was being closed and sealed. "No, I'm not staying!" Alex shouted, but the crew member seemed to just ignore her. Max pulled her back and anger flared in her. "What the hell is going on?" she asked and on instinct and being completely done with the situation, she did what she was trained to do. She took his arm, pulled it from her own, twisted it until it was behind his back, and shoved him face first against the bulkhead. "Tell them to open the door!"
The sound of the engine starting startled her and she was even more determined to get off. She'd told J'onn she was going to keep an eye on Max and make sure he slept, she didn't say she was going to go God knew where with him! It wasn't like she had his or Kara's super power or flight where she could just fly herself back to National City.
"Max! Start talking!" she shouted at him and spun him around, releasing his arm but pushing his back against the wall. Alex was frantic and stressed. Whatever was going on, she wasn't going to have any part in it.
"The files," was all he mumbled as he vaguely pointed towards the chair nearby.
Alex released him and stalked over to the chair and saw the manilla folder there and flung it open. She stepped back as if it had attacked her, her eyes wide in disbelief. Looking over at Max, she was still confused but she didn't know how to feel all of the sudden. The anger start to subside. She dropped to her knees and started to finger through the pages of the file. "No," she whispered.
"I wanted to give you more answers," Max mumbled as he slid to the floor and then reached up and picked up his drink. Alex could only see the top of his head now.
She turned back to the file, one hand nervously up by her mouth, as she read through the papers. She hadn't even realized that they'd taken off until the jet bounced for a split second.
It didn't matter.
"Talk to me."
"I…"
"Max," she said firmly and also tiredly.
"I wanted to find his remains...or give you some kind of closure," he finally sputtered out. He'd had an extra drink or two. Alex knew that that wasn't going to help things, but once she got her answers...then he could finally sleep.
She looked down at the file in her lap. They were both sitting on the floor, backs up against the wall, and drinks in hand. Alex had stared at the picture of her father smiling back at her for the last fifteen minutes and even though she'd re-read over everything...it still didn't make sense to her.
"I knew that you and your father were close...and that he died because of his involvement with the DEO-"
"He died twelve years ago, Max," she whispered.
"That's what I expected to find," Max said. "I wanted to give you this closure...but then I got all of this… I sent down a private investigator down there. He talked to...to your father...and he doesn't remember who he is. He has some name that was given to him. He was in some kind of accident and ever since then...he's been travelling around Peruvian villages offering medical aid and they've been giving him food and shelter and whatever he may need… He's been basically living off the grid."
"It's been twelve years," she whispered. She looked at the article that had the most recent picture of her father, it was in black and white but he still looked mostly the same to her. Tears sprung anew as she thought about him alive. The article talked about how this man had helped save a village and though her father wasn't a medical doctor, he obviously remembered enough.
They sat there for so long and she was nearly asleep and she swore Max was already sleeping, his head on her shoulder. She didn't know what to feel. Was she angry? Yes. Was it at Max? She wasn't sure. She was excited and happy and yet there were conflicting emotions that were cancelling them out...and she was at the point of feeling fairly numb. "Max, why were you so worried about telling me this?" she whispered as her head pressed against the hull and she closed her eyes.
"I didn't want to lose you," was his slurred and sleepy response.
He had no one, she reminded herself, only her.
"Max," she whispered as she turned to him and pressed a kiss into his hair. "Giving me my father back...it's not going to take me away from you...only you will do that."
He'd essentially kidnapped her.
She wouldn't forget that.
They were trying to figure out if they had chemistry beyond what was implanted in their heads...in those false memories...and she thought they'd been doing so well, but then there was this… He meant well, like always, but Max didn't seem to quite know how to go about things in the right way.
Right now, all they could do was sleep.
When they woke, they were on the ground in Peru.
"Max," she whispered. Apparently the crew hadn't thought it was necessary to wake them. Alex felt slightly hung over. She shook Max and then straightened herself up with a groan. She needed something for the dull pounding in her head and she needed to make calls. Alex wasn't sure how much time had passed, but she was certain that she had to have at least missed texts if not calls as well.
"Al...ex?"
She sighed and rubbed her face before searching for her phone because it wasn't in the pocket she remembered leaving it. "Max! Wake up!" Alex told him, loudly but not screaming. Her head hurt too much to scream. "We're in freaking Peru…" She only knew that because they'd landed and she assumed that they'd landed where apparently her father was acting as a medical nomad. She still wasn't pleased about being kidnapped, even given why Max had done it.
Could she forgive it?
She didn't know.
It was like he'd sobered up quickly for a second. "Peru? Wait...how'd we get to Peru?"
Alex got up, letting him fall to the floor without her to support his weight against her. He quickly recovered and looked more confused. She gathered up the file that had slipped from her hands when she'd fallen asleep and went in search of her phone. She had no idea if it would work there, sure she had international service but she didn't know if where they were had cell towers or wifi.
"Thank you," she whispered to herself when she spotted her phone and immediately grabbed it and clicked the 'home' button. The screen lit up giving her some very important information.
She had 20 missed texts.
She had 5 missed calls.
And absolutely no service.
"Please tell me this jet has a phone?" Alex nearly pleaded as she turned her head in the direction of a still out of it Max.
"Radio…"
No one knew where she was.
The GPS in her phone would still work...so she could just hope that they could track her...at least so far with that. Then there was the fact that they could get footage of the airport and see that she was on one of Max's jets and get their flight information. Somehow, someway...Kara and J'onn would figure out where in the world she was.
Or at least she hoped.
In the meantime, though, she was still going to look for a phone that was capable of making a call. She shoved her phone into a pocket and put the file under her arm as she looked around. She wasn't going to wait for Max to sober up. She needed to do something...she was in Peru...she needed to find a phone...figure out exactly where in Peru she was...and then she needed to look for her father.
She grabbed a backpack that was there and opened it to find it stocked with water, snacks, and a map. She stuffed the folder into it and then slung it over her shoulder and pulled her arm through the other strap before looking over at Max. Right now, she couldn't feel more distant from him and that was hard. Alex took off her ring and laid it on the small table near where Max had fallen asleep again near.
"Goodbye, Max," she whispered before heading over to the door.
Jeremiah Danvers was out there.
She couldn't wait.
TBC…