Disclaimer: I don't own anything, but my imagination - and that's limited.

Author's Notes: Spoiler warning: Season 5 . Many thanks to my friend Christie who read it first and commented on it! :) And many thanks to you for reading it! Enjoy!

I think it was a Sunday...

T.S. Elliot once said that "What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from."

Part 1

She turned the TV on with no intention of actually watching anything and poured some more coffee in her cup. She took the first magazine she spotted on the break-room table and started flipping through its pages. People smiling in advertisements, happy family pictures with the mother holding "The ideal cleaner for every woman!"… She chuckled. Yeah right. Like it's ever like that. With more power than the one probably needed, she closed the magazine and took another sip from her coffee.

"Are you ok?" She heard a voice behind her. She turned to find Grissom standing at the door as if he wasn't sure if he wanted to come in or stay out.

"Sure!" she added with a somehow forced smile.

"Sara…" Grissom started. He paused, finally entering the room, and sat on the chair next to hers. "Sara, I know it was a difficult case for you. Go home, relax, read a book… You don't have to stay here. Everything's under control. Greg's no baby –he can't avoid paper work forever, you know- and I… Well, it's fine for everyone!" he smiled. Except me, of course. One smile of yours and I know I can get through the rest of the day. He gathered himself quickly enough, so that he would be able to take notice of her answer and actually be in position to answer back.

"It was a difficult case for all of us, Gris. I just don't see why I should be the exception and go home." Liar. Yeah… She was good at lying. Especially when it came to herself.

"Uh… Sara…" He sighed. "Ok, if you think so… Do whatever you think it's best for you."

"… Thank you."

"You're welcome." He smiled.

Heavy silence fell between them. Grissom frowned like he was trying to figure out the solution to an extremely hard crossword puzzle. "Maybe that would be better for both of them." These were her exact words when they last talked about the case. Truth be told he got a bit upset himself too with the whole case although he wasn't the one threatened to be killed. But that was exactly why it was upsetting, wasn't it? Sara… Dead… Away from him… Not speaking to her, not seeing her, not smelling her, not touching her… Even the thought of it was unbearable. So much that even the slightest possibility of it happening made him shiver. But she was there now. In front of him. Speaking to him.

And he could protect her the way her parents failed to do or just pray that she would be safe. He could hug her and tell her everything's going to be fine or he could just walk away once more –he always did that up to now, anyway- and hope that she would find the strength and walk on her own again. He knew she had feelings for him. Even if she hadn't made that clear during their previous encounter at her place, he could tell. Whatever Catherine may have thought of his inexperienced life, he was no idiot. And again… Even if he was wrong about any other woman, he knew he could read Sara.

Sometimes she really does look like a butterfly! He smiled at that thought! It sounded almost insulting! He was not sure about her next move, she could surprise him any time, and yet when she did move he was sure what he would see. Just like his butterflies! And - was it only him who thought that? - she seemed so vulnerable under this toughness she tried so hard to show the others… I could protect her, you know, but… Am I really capable of that? Doesn't she deserve someone better, younger, more experienced in relationships with people? How could he help her when their social skills were both on the same neutral level?

Silence.

Sara coughed as she took another sip of the hot coffee that burned her throat.

You should say something! This is getting way too awkward!

"Do you want to talk about it?" asked Grissom.

"What? The case? I thought we were done!"

"I'm talking about you."

"Grissom, I , uh, I said I'm fine."

He licked his lips. God, is she stubborn! But that was one of the things he liked about her, wasn't it?

"Have a cup of coffee with me." The invitation came out of his mouth without even realising he uttered the words.

"Ok… Do you want me to get you some?"

"No! I mean out of here. A café."

"Oh! Uh…!" She looked down to the floor.

Shit.

"As friends, you know!" he added quickly. Maybe too quickly.

"Friends." Friends… Friends… "Yes! Umm… Ok! Let's go!"

"Good! Allow me 5' to get some papers for Ecklie and we're leaving"

The small quiet café in the west side of the city had a pleasant smell of something between chocolate and coffee being suspended in the still air. From the corner they were seated, they could only watch the workers granting the customers' requests behind the counter and the street outside the small window next to their table.

Sara drank some more tea - she didn't order coffee; another one and she would start shaking- and glanced reluctantly across the table at her boss. My boss. Grissom. Are bosses supposed to have coffee with their co-workers and talk about their personal stuff? Oh, come on! Why not? "As friends, you know!" Who am I kidding? We both know –"and not tell", a light voice added inside her- we're more than friends. Well… Not like they had an intimate relationship or anything but more like… um… let's just say felt something more.

She remembered that seminar in San Francisco, where they first met. She had felt charmed by his intelligence and knowledge, as most girls like her would. She had even found the psychological explanation for it! Like she wouldn't! Apparently, many young women fell for their teachers/advisors/supervisors, dazzled by their experience in life and their wisdom. That's crap! I know I'm in love with Grissom just because he is Grissom and not any other stupid psychologically explained thingy! I mean… Seriously!!

"So…" she heard him saying, and being dragged out of her thoughts she lifted her gaze from the table to eye him.

"So…" she said calmly half-smiling. It seems that the only thing they were perfectly capable of was to create awkwardness between them. She brought her hand close to her face and tucked a disobedient lock of her hair behind her ear.

Grissom sensed her discomfort and decided that even though his primary reason for asking her to have coffee with him was to discuss about the case's impact on her, it was neither the right time nor the place. Regardless of his worries, he took the napkin from under his cup and while playfully folding it into smaller pieces, he said instead:

"Greg's been doing pretty well for a beginner..!"

"… Yeah! He is, um, trying very hard! I think he really wanted to achieve this." She replied with a hidden surprise. She had to admit that she had half-expected a well planned attack about the previous evening resulting to her usual denial and his insistence.

"If he didn't want to then he wouldn't have to go through all of this. Plus I'm a firm believer of the attitude 'You only succeed in what you want to succeed.' Nothing more or less."

Sara laughed at his comment. "That's true!" she nodded. "You know, he's been trying extra hard for you…" She paused at this end met his eye. "I mean, apart from everything else, he likes to feel that you like him and respect him both as a co-worker and as a person…"

He raised his eyebrow – a move she knew all too well – and declared:

"That's almost absurd! If he wanted that, he didn't have to become a CSI. I already respect him as one of the best lab-technicians I've ever met."

"Well… It's not like you ever make your emotions clear…" She put an early stop at that point realising that she approached dangerous territory and nervously looked outside the window with such interest as if aliens where marching by.

Grissom felt the heat of the coffee raising from his stomach, passing from his heart and finally landing on his cheeks. That was a well-done hit, he thought. He placed the napkin back on the table and brought the cup on his lips taking another sip. He tried to calm himself and think of an answer as suitable to their original subject as possible.

"Everyone does their best, Sara… Not all people can express their beliefs and feelings openly, you know that." He explained in an almost defensive tone.

"Yeah… I do." She answered without withdrawing her stare from the traffic light across the road, which at that moment was turning red. She didn't bother to bring him out of this embarrassing state by changing the subject. It was his fault after all. She had offered him many chances in the past; from now on if he desired anything that had to do with her, he would have to reach for it on his own.

They ceased talking and Sara fixed her eyes on a child that hang from his mother's skirt begging her for some ice-cream.

The silence had become almost unbearable for Grissom who sat there consumed in his thoughts, wondering how they managed to make their conversation turn out that way.

"You know what…?" she whispered. "I'll just leave. I have to go home anyway and this… meeting can't do good to either of us." She picked up her cell phone from the table and made a move to stand up when she felt a warm hand grabbing her arm. Grissom looked directly into her eyes, his gaze altering between her left and right one. Knocked over by the blue ocean in front of her, Sara stood there for a second confused by the power his eyes had on her and after blinking once or twice she finally gave in and sat down.

He hadn't really planned on reacting so, but either way he was pleased he did. Feeling the softness of her bare arm still tickling his palm, he moved his chair closer to hers and ignoring her surprised look he started talking.

"Sara… Please… Just… Just stay here. I want to… We have to talk."