Dear Diary
Uhh hey. How's it? Rosalie here, Emmet bought me a diary as apparently I have too much pent up anger, which I think is ridiculous. Initially I refused to write in it (you?) because I don't have a problem, I'm fine! But then Alice told me about how both Jasper and Edward were getting angsty listening to my thoughts and emotions around Bella and the family lately, and that it was causing a drift in the family, which is the last thing we need right now. She seemed to think that me writing down all my thoughts and what not would help me to release all my anger and frustration so no-one else would have to listen to it. Which I can sort of understand and well, they're my brothers, I'd do anything for them. I know everyone thinks I'm some kind of horrible bitch who's bitter and wanting to live my life through Bella (that's what Alice accused me of the other day, "I know you wanted children Rosalie, but you can't make Bella have children for you".) but that's not who I am and to be honest I'm getting sick of everyone thinking I can't take a joke or be happy. I guess I can see that I do come across as nasty though, but I'm just trying to give Bella the chance I never had and make her see why I can't sit back and watch her make that mistake...is that so hard to understand? I don't see why my family are putting her and us at such a huge risk, for their own selfishness. It's not fair on Bella or Edward, or us as a family. Not that they see it that way, they're blinded by Edwards happiness. I feel like I'm the only one who see's the situation as dangerous and unfair as it is, or has the potential to be.
Anyway, time for the grumpy bitch and her fun loving beefy husband to go hunting, and then indulge in another activity sure to release stress and tension, if you get what I mean :P (I know, shock horror, Rosalie can take a joke.)
xx

ROSE ITS EM. LOOK IM SORRY FOR READING YOUR DIARY, AND ADMITTING TO IT PROBABLY ISN'T SMART (PLEASE DON'T HURT ME BABE) BUT I HAVE A FEW QUESTIONS AND THINGS TO SAY. FIRST OF ALL, WE DON'T SEE YOU AS ANGRY AND BITTER, OKAY MAYBE SOMETIMES, AND BELLA PROBABLY DOES RIGHT NOW, AND EVEN IF WE DON'T UNDERSTAND OR AGREE WITH YOUR OBJECTIONS TO ALL THIS, WE STILL LOVE YOU COS YOUR OUR SISTER AND MY BABY. I KNOW YOU CAN TAKE A JOKE, OTHERWISE WHY WOULD YOU BE WITH ME, AKA THE FUNNIEST PERSON EVERRRRRR. BUT ROSE, WHY ARE YOU SO UNHAPPY WITH YOUR LIFE? IS BEING A VAMPIRE THAT BAD FOR YOU? DO YOU HATE THIS LIFE THAT MUCH?... AND HOW ARE WE BEING SELFISH BY WANTING BELLA TO BE PART OF OUR FAMILY, SHE WANTS IT JUST AS MUCH AS WE DO (MINUS YOU AND EDWARD). PLEASE DONT BE ANGRY AT ME HUN I LOOOOOOOOOOVE YOU SWEETIE. LET'S GO 'RELEASE SOME STRESS AND TENSION' :p:p. XXXXXXXXXXXX

Oh Emmet! Why would you read my diary??!
Okay so I'm not surprised really, disappointed and angry maybe, as you might have noticed because I haven't spoken to you since reading this. And no more 'releasing stress and tension', in the way you mean anyway for ATLEAST a week. This is meant to be a diary, not a letter to you!
Okay calm down Rosalie. To try and answer your questions etc, first of all I know that YOU don't see me as bitter and grumpy all the time, but that's cos you know me better than I know myself sometimes. And I can be myself around you, and you bring out the best in me, because you love me and accept me for me and I don't have to share you like I do the rest of the family. I belong to you, but at the same time Em, there are obviously things about me that you don't understand. So maybe now's the right time to let you know and help you understand. Just keep in mind, that no matter what I say, you are the light of my life, and truly the best thing that has ever happened to me... Okay so your questions...Why am I so unhappy with my life? Is being a vampire that bad? Do I hate life that much? Um um so...You know what happened to me as a human, and that i was left by the one person who was meant to love me for the rest of my life and give me the family and love i desired. By becoming a vampire, I lost chance to be a mother. I lost the chance to grow old and see my brother grow old with me, I never got to have a baby girl or boy, to have that big wedding and grow old with my husband. Bella is too young to understand what she's giving up. Emmet you have to know I would give anything to have that life, it's all I ever wanted and Bella is ready to give it up just like that. I know what you're going to say, that she's the same age as I was when I was changed, but things were different then. It was normal for a girl of my age to be married and settling down, it was expected of us. We were made to grow up so much faster, girls these days are allowed to be young much longer than us, and they have so many more opportunities than I did. I just think if Bella waits a couple of years... you know. Babe, I'm happy in general. But if I had been given the choice between life as a human or eternal life, I'd want to be a human. Not because I hate all this and you and our family, but because I have such a strong longing for a child hunnie. Carlisle only changed me because I was going to die anyway, same with Edward and Esme, and that's why I changed you as you know. But Bella's alive and well. SHE has that choice I always wanted. I'm jealous and it's breaking my heart to know that she could wait a few years and then make this choice. Edward would still be where ever she is, she knows that and she knows he'd be willing to change her when she's old enough and has been through enough to be able to make that decision wisely.
And as for how you're all being selfish... okay maybe I'm being a bit harsh. But you're all so eager to turn her into a vampire that you're exploiting the fact that she wants it too, your thinking about what she wants, not what is best for her. What happens if after a couple of years she decides she wants a child after all? Or she misses Charlie and Renee; you know how much that would break Edwards's heart. I don't ever want to see him hurt that much Em, he's the closest thing to a brother I've ever had. I know me and him aren't as close as him and Alice, but he helped me through my change, and was my best friend for the best half of my vampire life so far, until I met you. You know what he's like babe; he'd forever blame himself and probably do something extremely stupid (such as got to Italy...flashback anyone?). Edwards been empty, and it is great to see him so alive and happy for once, but Esme and Carlisle are using his happiness to guide their decisions. They want Bella in our family, which is great, I do too eventually, but now isn't the right time. Alice see's Bella as her new best friend, and a barbie doll to dress up and play with. Jasper is of course driven by Edwards emotions of course, no doubt he doesn't want to have to feel all that angst and despair any more. And you hun, I see how you light up when Bella is around; she's the little sister you always wanted. To laugh at and joke with and protect. But babe, I need you to see my point of view. She doesn't need this as much as she thinks she does, or as much as you all think we do.
Woah, so there's a novel for yah. Em, I'm still angry at you for reading my diary, but at the same time I'm not. Cos it's given me a way to explain to you how I feel, you know I'm no good with words in person. I love you my grizzly bear, xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxoooooooooooooooooooooooo