Chapter 1

It had been harder to avoid him, and each time they passed each other, she strived to keep the distance. It was painful, and it hurt, not being able to talk to him the same way as before. The knowledge of his feelings for her had made it so much harder for her to keep the distance. He knew that she remembered, and there was no way that she could say otherwise. She knew that they could never be together, yet he was still trying to fight for a lost cause.

I am not a lost cause! A voice within her tried to hope for what she knew could never happen. She was a lost cause. She could never reveal her feelings to him because it would only lead to disaster and heartbreak. He was a king and she was a rider. He was above her class, and she could never hope for a happy ending. Looking down, Karigan muttered a greeting to her monarch who had turned the corner.

"Rider, could I have a private word with you?"

"If you will excuse me for saying so Sire, but if it is of not much importance, I am extremely busy with paperwork." She replied, still avoiding his gaze. With a slight gesture of his hand, he told her that it was not of much importance and that she could proceed with her task. With a sigh of relief, Karigan murmured her respects and walked on through the corridor. King Zachary watched her retreating form and let out a small sigh himself. He could see how she avoided looking at him and tried her hardest to stay away from him. Either she always had somewhere to be or he had somewhere to be. There was never a moment where they could talk freely… talk things over. He had signed the contract, but it did not mean it couldn't be broken. He had been able to solve so many problems. Why couldn't he solve this one?

Because there is more than one problem, and they are all connected. The answer made sense. He was unsure if Karigan even loved him back, but he had reason to believe she did. She purposely avoided him when she saw him, and she refused to talk freely with him like she used to. It could have been of embarrassment, he thought, but it did not seem likely. Then, there was the marriage contract. There was a loop-hole, but it had certain limitations to it. Estora had a strong character but not as strong as Karigan. She bended to her father's will, and it would be a matter of convincing Coutre to call off the marriage. Either that or Lady Estora would have to end it herself. With the latter, he would have no dishonor on his part, but for Lady Estora and Coutre, things could go slightly wrong. Then, there was the problem of convincing the Lord Governors to sanction their marriage. That would prove to be the hardest part of the process. Shaking his head, he headed to his study to clear some paperwork before his next row of meetings.

Why was she unable to avoid him? Why couldn't her life be free of the torment she now faced? She always knew that she would find a person she loved one day but did it have to be the king of Sacoridia? She felt like she was deceiving Estora by even having these feelings. That breach in their friendship had vanished like it had never existed, but Karigan felt even more guilt for hurting Estora. She didn't deserve the hostility that Karigan had shown towards her, and even worse, she didn't know why. It must have confused her, and pained her to lose her only friend.

She had been so tired when she had come out of the tombs, but she remembered that expression on his face clearly. He looked surprised but then, fear shone in his eyes. At the time, she didn't care but now, she knew it was fear for her. Was that why he constantly wished to talk to her? To make sure she was all right? Karigan felt like she was hurting him as much as she had hurt Estora but there was no other choice. She was not going to get herself mixed up in these kinds of affairs, especially with the king of Sacoridia. Sighing, Karigan turned back to her paperwork.

She had never once gotten the courage to ask her friend about her actions before the intrusion. One day, Karigan refused to talk to her except for in a formal tone and then, it seemed like the next day, she would lay down her life for her. Also, on the day of the garden party, there was something strange going on with her. Not just her but King Zachary too. There had been something in their voices, something in their eyes that had been cleverly concealed. And she was determined to figure it out.

Leaning back on her chair, Estora began to think over when Karigan had turned away from her. It had been… the day of the marriage announcement. She looked angry at something. Perhaps angry wasn't the right word. More disappointed than angry. Still, the reason eluded her. She had thought about it day and night. Had she said something wrong to her? Is that why Karigan had pushed her away?

And King Zachary too, he had reacted differently. After the announcement, the mask of his had slipped for a moment. In his eyes she could see sadness and pain. It was only for a moment, but it told a great deal. Something about the marriage made him unhappy, probably even more so than her. It could be that there was someone else who caught his eye. She remembered the walk she had taken with him the summer rider barracks burnt. There had been someone who had caught his eye then. Before she could think about it any further, her peace was interrupted. Sighing, she answered the call of her mother.

The stars stood out amongst the midnight blue sky. A full moon shone down upon the castle gardens and illuminated the face of a brown-haired rider, sitting on a bench. Her head was in her hands and her eyes were clenched shut. She tried to block the flow of memories from her mind but still, they appeared in her mind, reminding her of the events a few weeks ago. She wanted to scream but no sound came out of her mouth. Even when she wasn't sleeping, the nightmares still haunted her. Staring at the ground, she sighed. She had finally managed to dispel the images from her mind. Her only hope was that they would let her rest until the next night.

"Are you alright?" a soft gentle voice came from behind her. Lifting her head up, Karigan turned around to see the person she had least wanted to see at the moment. He would only bring her back into her living nightmares, she knew and she turned back to the flowers in front of her, avoiding his question. A feeling of uneasiness settled over her as he took a seat beside her.

"Karigan, I know that I am probably the last person you want to see right now but we need to talk this… whatever this is over." He sighed. Standing up, Karigan turned to face him, anger settling in her eyes.

"There is nothing to talk about." She said forcefully, turning on her heel to walk away, when she felt an arm on her hand. Spinning around, she came face to face with Fastion, Willis and the other few weapons.

"If you will excuse us rider, but yes, there is something to talk about. And since you can be overheard quite easily here, there is somewhere to talk about this" Fastion said keeping his hard-set expression. Several other Weapons nodded their heads in approval. She knew that she had no choice but to stay. Even invisible, there was nowhere she could run to. She followed King Zachary and the Weapons to the side of the castle, and they stopped at a door on the side.

The stone walls outside rose high and the wall where the door was propelled out from the side of the castle. Three weapons stood on guard at the outer wall while three more stood on guard at the second wall inside the other. Karigan and Zachary passed through the door in the second wall to a garden lighted slightly from the moonlight. After they lit the torches, Karigan took a seat on a bench.

"Karigan, I know that you must hate me right now for talking to you right now, but I feel that we need to… talk things out.

"I want you to know that I am sorry. I am sorry for everything, especially for telling you after I accepted the… contract." He began, looking at her, his eyes begging for forgiveness.

"Sire, there is nothing to forgive, so you have no need to mutter apologies." She responded with a slight hint of anger in her voice. How could he do this to her? Expect her to talk about their…relationship? No, there was no relationship. She was a rider and was bound to his service. There was nothing more, nothing less. She had no feelings for him, and it would rest at that.

"If there is nothing to forgive, then tell me something. Why have you been avoiding me?"

Karigan froze her expression blank. Her hands gripped the seat as she struggled to find the words. He was right, the part of her that hoped for what could never be felt. If she didn't feel anything for him, then why had she been avoiding him? No! She didn't care. It was to… prevent these feelings from ever coming!

"I…I um… uh…" Karigan struggled to find the words. He gazed at her intently, still waiting for an answer. A nervous feeling swelled in her heart as she searched through her mind to find the right words. She knew why she was avoiding him, but she just couldn't tell him. She had tried to deny this for so long, but one day or another, she would have to tell him that she loved him.

"I… um… I wasn't avoiding you. I was just too busy to…talk."

"Would that explain why you always turned away at the sight of me?" he asked softly. He could see the startled expression on her face and could sense her distress from his questions. But he had to know. Maybe, if the feeling was mutual, they could have a happy ending to their story, but then he thought of the limitations of ruling a country. It would kill Karigan to stay caged and trapped like he was. He had no desire to bring about that feeling for her, but then again, it was exactly what he was doing to her now. It was the only way he could find out, and he didn't believe that she would tell him straight out.

"You force me in here and expect me to answer your every question? I had every right to avoid you considering that you are getting married to my friend. You left me with the knowledge that I wished I had never known. Tell me how you would feel if you were in my place? Guilty? Because that's exactly how I've been feeling since that night. Guilty, like I was betraying my friend by even having the knowledge of your… your feelings!" she lashed out unexpectedly. He looked startled for a moment before a deep sorrow settled in his heart. She was right. If things had been the other way around, and he was in her place, he would have felt the same. Her words, like an arrow, pierced his heart and he felt all his hopes and dreams fade slowly away. She must hate him for bringing that upon her.

"I'm sorry." Karigan spoke softly. She could read the pain in his eyes. She hadn't meant to hurt him. Staring at her shoes, she sighed.

"It's all right. There is no need to be sorry. What you said is true, and I know that I have gone about this the wrong way. I only wish that I could have taken back those words and made this ordeal easier."

"Even that wouldn't have changed the guilt" Karigan heard herself mutter, her eyes widening as she realized what she had just said. She searched frantically through her mind for a way to explain. Glancing up at him, she exhaled in relief, thinking that he hadn't heard her.

"Do you still feel guilty?" the question was unexpected, breaking through the brief silence that had been in the air. Karigan nodded, rising to her feet and turning away. King Zachary swallowed, and his hands started to become clammy. He prepared to ask her the most important question he would ever ask a person.

"Do you love me?"

Hey. So... did you like it? Please R&R and tell me what I need to change and whatnot. I don't feel to bad about this first chapter but I tend to write whatever comes into my mind so I don't know how bad the other chapters will be. Also, I am unsure about how long it will take me to update and post new chapters because sometimes, I get writer's block and other times, I just don't have any ideas. So I'll see where this goes and try and update ASAP. Thank You!

Also, thanks to Cassidy Alice for supporting my stories. She is a really amazing writer in my eyes, and she constantly motivates me to continue my stories. If you get a chance, please R&R her stories. Unfortunately, she does not write for the Green Rider series, but still, she is a very good writer and gives me ideas from time to time. Hope you enjoyed my story!

Naturelover5628