Title: Oil and Water
Author: Fyyrrose
Rating: PG-13
Song: Lonely in Gorgeous TV
Disclaimer: Again so not mine. Believe you me, I wish it was…
Summary: George just can't forget his past
Notes: SPOILERS…if you haven't read the manga completely, or seen the anime completely, then read this at your own risk!
The still night air rested soundlessly on my dampened skin. Work was tiring but in the end, I was really invigorated by it. The cool air hit my reddened face and it was like a sweet caress.
I forgot how good it felt to feel this way. I almost forgot this feeling. The night was like a secret lover embracing me after a long, hard day. I smiled to myself and wrapped my arms around myself. No, I wasn't cold; I was embracing it.
No matter how many times people hold you in their arms, tell you that they love you, shower you with affection; the night's caress is always special. It's something only you can feel, only you can see, only you can partake.
It made me feel special.
If only the night was real, then it could set my skin afire. Most of my lovers have made me feel, yet none have made me feel so…so carefree; that is until I met her. She was a muse in which I felt myself falling.
Oh, how I fell. It was a ride the entire time. Together we were like a beautiful dressing, but that's what we truly were: oil and water. Everything comes to a standstill eventually. I just made sure that we were apart before that time came.
Then the time we spent together was more precious, more surreal. A part of me will always compare her to everyone else. But that's the way love goes. Instead of throwing our passion on the fire, I decided it would be best if I threw it away.
It would only hinder us. I couldn't bear that type of responsibility. Call me a coward, but everything I do is for the best. Not just the best for me, but for her welfare as well.
The drive back to my spacious apartment is uneventful, the neon lights, the LED screens, even the street lamps have taken away my precious night. I no longer have to fully concentrate on the drive to ensure that I will get there safely.
I put on the kettle to make some tea. Being alone means I must do things for myself. I don't mind really, but it's on nights like these when the emptiness of my apartment really takes a toll on my inner psyche. I'm almost tempted to call out my own name to see if there's an echo.
That would be foolish and I shake my head.
I took my steeped tea and carried it with me to the living room. Setting it down on the coffee table, I traded it for the remote. It's become religious that I watch the nightly fashion report. Some people watched the news, or a nightly comedy; I watched fashion.
How could I not? I wasn't interested in the clothing or the stories; I was trying to get a glimpse of her. When I first arrived here, I turned it on because I was bored, and it was too late to do anything. That's when she flashed on the screen.
I too smiled back at her image. She had developed the confidence in herself and in her abilities. I was glad that I was a part of her life. Both of us became better people because of our time together.
She blossomed nicely. I knew she would. I helped create her. She became more beautiful as time passed. Soon she was considered too old for modeling and took on acting. I smirked the first time I saw her. She was believable, and too cute.
I have all her screen time on VHS and DVD. I'm not stalking her or anything. A stalker would require knowing where she is at this very moment—which I could do—but I value her too much to stoop that low.
Besides, don't stalkers have shrines and walls plastered with pictures? All memories of her are kept in a box under the bed. She's placed with memories of my past: where the past belongs.
I remember her wedding. Someone as famous as her would have her wedding televised. I remember watching her, somehow my heart panged when I realized that it wasn't me. I knew I would always care for her, but this was the choice I made.
I wanted her to be happy. Her dress was pretty, nothing that I would create, but it was acceptable…I guess. If I'd have known, I would have created something more prestigious for her to wear. I didn't know if she would have even accepted it. I didn't know if she accepted anything I gave her until her wedding.
On her right hand, more specifically, on her right ring finger lay the butterfly ring I created for her sometime long ago: another lifetime ago. It made me happy to see that she treasured my collection; well I guess it was now her collection.
It was hard to part with everything that I kept dear, but it was a steppingstone that I overcame. I even cried when she spoke her vows. It wasn't because of jealousy; it was because I was truly happy for her.
She had made something out of herself, while I simply moved on. But that was life.
Nothing good was on the fashion report, so I ejected the DVD from the recorder and labeled it like I did all the others. I brought it to my room and slipped it into the case with all its brothers and sisters.
I've only seen a few episodes, I tape them now, but I have yet to sit down and watch them. Eventually I will, and when I do I'll realize that I taped the wrong station or at the wrong time. But that's life.
After all, the end result of everything I do in my life is my decision. If it's good or bad it doesn't matter, so long as the decision was mine to make. Not everything in life goes on as we plan.
I smirked, I don't really have a plan for my life, and I just know that I want to be able to support those that I love. That was why I was here. I couldn't depend on anyone but myself to see this life through to the end.
In the end, the only person I can depend on is myself. That way, if and when I fall, the only person to blame would be me.
I got undressed and slipped into the silken sheets. The bed was cold and empty. It was nights like this that I wished I had purchased a single bed, not the king sized monster I was currently laying in.
Yes I was lonely, but again, this was by choice. You know, if I had the choice to redo everything, would I? I've pondered the question, although with no serious thought, because we cannot relive our past. I would have to say I would do everything the same way again.
Why? Because, there is no going back, and to make errors means you're alive. Besides, thinking of the what-ifs takes too much out of me, and if I ponder on it too much; I could be depressed about it.
The world I live in is of my own making. There is no going back. If I did it wrong, then c'est la vie.
I closed my eyes and pictured my princess sleeping next to me. I was doing it again. I'm just glad I was there to help her break out of her shell. She became a beautiful queen, and that's all I can take credit for.
I smirked and shifted so I snuggled into the down-filled pillow. Tomorrow was going to be another day; another chance to see the morning dew and sun rise up from the cloudy mist. After all, tomorrow is just another day.
- FIN -
Beta: All fixed. I'm surprised you weren't harder on George, since you seemed to hate him! I feared for him, but you took out Neji instead, so it's all good. Ha! And I hope those lovely pictures caused you much mental scarring!