METAMORPHOSIS

Author's Note- Carolyn and Daniel and any persons, places, or things that appeared in the TV show belong to the studio, RA Dick, and the powers that be. The other characters originated and have been tweaked into being by Mary and myself under various names. No infringement or harm is meant. Thanks to Mary for beta help. The poem Daniel quotes was written by Kipling and was originally intended to appear in the canon episode- There's a Seal in My Bathtub- but got cut.

November 15, 1982 Monday

"It's mornings like this that I WISH being your soul mate meant I would get some of your powers," Carolyn Gregg informed her husband through a yawn. "Like the ability to pop."

The handsome ghost grinned. "I will admit that it's a gift that is quite handy, my dear. However, those modern automobile things of which Tristan is so enamored are quite efficient. In my time, if you took a fifty-mile one-way journey, I'd not see you again for several days. That would not be -," he paused, considering what the proper slang term was, " - cool, as Candy might say."

"I don't think I'd make the trip in that instance," she said, gulping coffee, "unless you came along."

A knock cut short their conversation. "Sounds like your ride is here, dear lady," Daniel noted. "I'll let them in." With that, he teleported from the kitchen to the front door where he let in Lynne Avery and Dave, Jenny, and Amberly Farnon. Dr. Lynne was holding the baby.

As Jenny hugged her foster dad, she glanced at her husband who had bent over to pet Dakota and gotten his face licked. "You are using mouthwash before I kiss you again, darling."

He shrugged. "Okay. Is Carolyn ready to roll? She and Jen are supposed to sign their books for at least an hour before the lecture at noon." Carolyn and Jenny were both romance authors, and had decided to attend a local writing conference for the day. Dave, as their publicist, was going along. When Lynne had heard where it was, she had asked to go along. It had been several years since she checked on the upkeep of her late husband's grave, and she felt like she should. Amberly was going to stay with Captain Gregg for the day.

"She's getting a last cup of coffee," the Captain said.

"You really could come along, sir," Dave commented, giving the huge, shaggy dog's head a last ruffle. "You did co-write with Carolyn."

"Yeah, and you'd give those pretty boy cover models a run for their money," Jenny added.

"Thank you, dear girl," Daniel winked, "but, I fear that sounds as appealing as attending another PTA meeting."

Lynne shuddered as she handed Amberly off. "That was the nicest part about Thomas growing up. No more of those - nightmares. Of course, I did have my beeper when I did have to attend them."

"Hey, you two, stop scaring Dave and Jenny," Carolyn chided as she entered the room and came over to kiss her 'grandchild'. "Hi, sweet girl. Don't go charming my husband's affections away while I'm gone."

"Gran!" the little girl announced proudly. At fourteen months, she was becoming quite vocal.

Carolyn laughed. "The sooner we go, the sooner we'll be home." Standing on tiptoe, she met Daniel halfway for a kiss over the baby's head.

"Be safe and swift, love," the Captain whispered.

"I'll be careful," Dave promised. "You and the princess will be okay, won't you?"

"Quite," Daniel nodded. "And should any of you be needed, well, it DOES come in handy to have my crew so near to call."

With a few more good-byes and last minute instructions, Daniel and Amberly saw the travelers off.

XXX

Two hours later, Dave dropped Lynne off at St. Brigid's Cemetery.

"Want me to come back in-- how long- to pick you up for the rubber chicken lunch?" he asked the doctor.

She pushed her sunglasses down her nose to peer at him. "Rubber chicken? Isn't that taking vegetarianism to the extreme? They aren't endangered. No need to eat rubber."

From the back seat, Carolyn laughed. "No, Lynne. It's just- Dave and I have gotten used to the rather - disgusting fare - these things serve. Tasteless is the best we can hope for."

The attractive woman leaned over to stage whisper, "I'll get us all a late lunch somewhere around. Jen, you and Dave aren't that long out of childhood. I'm sure you still know how to poke your food around and just look like you ate." She snorted. "I know how to do that, and it's been a little longer."

"But not much," Carolyn added, since she and Lynne were almost the same age.

"Just a touch," she agreed. "Don't worry about picking me up. The hotel is only about a mile off. I've walked farther in Schooner Bay, and the weather's nice."

She watched them drive away, then resolutely turned to march into the graveyard. Pensively, she wandered past the sculpted angels and cold monuments. Lynne frankly wasn't too sure where she was going. It had been... a while. Since before she and her son, Thom, had moved to Schooner Bay in the early seventies. Shivering, and not from the chilled air, she pulled her cardigan tighter.

Finally, she found the tombstone.

ALAN CLIFFORD AVERY

BELOVED HUSBAND & FATHER

1932-59

For a few moments, she stared at the gray slab. Everything seemed to be well maintained and in order. Well, according to her brother-in-law, this was a reputable cemetery. He'd also pointed out at the time, since their entire family had been living in Whitecliff when Alan was killed, it was convenient. Even in her fog of grief, Lynne had been forced to bite back a sarcastic remark on the order of, "Yes, I'm sure he and I can have long, meaningful chats so much more easily if it's handy to get to." Her nephew, Blackie, had only been five, but had piped up, "But, Dad, Uncle Alan's in Heaven right? Not there." Lynne had not been at all surprised when the boy became a pastor.

Clearing her throat, she began speaking. "Hi, honey, I'm back. Sheesh, this feels- stupid. You aren't here. I mean, I could've said this back in Schooner Bay. Of course, I never know when someone, read Siegfried especially, is going to just pop or poof in. Uh, you don't know Sig, I guess, unless - do they have a TV screen up there? Can you- er- see me? You know, conversation is easier when it's two way- unless it's with Sig, then you just listen. Look, I guess - I'm sorry- I haven't come to see you, but I don't think you're here. I already said that. Okay, uh- these places creep me out, y'know. But, - I needed something physical to talk to, something that clearly says you're- well- dead and not a ghost. You aren't, are you? If you are, speak up. I can take it." She fell silent. No one spoke to her. "Yeah, thought so. Of course, you wouldn't hang around this place." She looked around before drawling, "It'd be terribly boring. And, if you've been a ghost all this time and never said, I CAN arrange to have you hurt. I might anyway. Blast it, Alan- did you KNOW you had some kind of genetic time bomb inside and I'd be a widow now, even if that idiot sniper hadn't taken a potshot at you? What am I saying? Diagnosing stuff was not as refined back then. So, probably not. Still. But it doesn't matter. I'd still have wanted Thom, even knowing-- " she broke off, her jaw setting, as the words refused to be said. "What's that bit in Carolyn's favorite musical- 'tis better to love and lose than never to love at all? And, if I hadn't had Thomas- he wouldn't have been alive to meet Candy Muir and marry him so that Carolyn- that's her mom- would become my best friend, and I wouldn't have gotten to know all her friends so well. And Jess- you remember Jess, she was my maid of honor, wouldn't have moved here and met Adam. He's her husband, but he was Carolyn's friend before that, and he met her through his - main client." She gulped, reddening. "Through- Charlie, Lord Charles Dashire the- danged if know what number. He's Carolyn's husband's other best friend besides Sean. And- well, I think I l- er- like him- but not like I LIKE Sig or Tristan ... "

Scuffing her toe in the cold ground, Lynne paused to take a deep breath. "I mean, really like. Maybe- maybe, more than like. Love even. But, I- still love you. It's just- both men I love are - sorta-" her voice dropped to a whisper, "dead. One's just - available, and he makes me laugh. More than I ever remember laughing, and feel special. I just- don't want to keep on thinking I'm betraying you by loving him. I- our- daughter-in-law's kinda taught me that it's very possible to be in love twice over and not betray both. It's just- each has a time, and - well, right now, it's Charlie's turn. He's here, and you are just - in my memory and heart. So, if it bugs you, speak up, or- let me let you just settle into a place in my heart and mind. And, if you see Mrs. Dashire, Aislynn, see if she could do the same for him?"

Lynne bit her lip, then reached out to brush the top of the stone with her fingers. "I'll always love you, sweetheart. But, we're over. Finally."

XXX

"So, young lady," Captain Gregg announced, looking down at the little girl in his arms, "it would seem we are on our own for the day. Are you in the mood for a story? Now, don't give me that look. I do not think you are ready for the Ancient Mariner. It's not as bad as Claymore makes out, you know. He has no taste, well, no good taste."

He carried her to the sofa where they sat down. "We finished the Radcliffe boy's story a while back. Why don't I tell you a real story? No, not about the cellar. Your dad would not be thrilled if I gave you nightmares. I'll tell you about the time- no, telling you how your Uncle Sean and I skipped school would not do. Ah, I know. I'll tell you about when your Uncle Sean met Aunt Molly for the first time. And if you're still awake at the end, I will keep on until we get to their reunion, or until you fall asleep, whichever comes first."

Daniel was confident that it would not be too long before the child slept, then he could get on with the projects he had on his docket. In the last few years, the sea charts had more often than not been neglected, family had become more important to him, after all. He did have an idea or two for writing projects, and Adam had asked for input on designing the nursery he and Jess would soon need. With Carolyn away, it would be easier to do these things in spirit form, using minimal power, but until Amberly decided to nap, he could not revert to that state.

Of course, as Amberly was a female, albeit a very small one, she confounded him. A day or two ago, Jenny had mentioned the lass was teething, but Daniel had been sure she'd already done that, months ago. How long could it last? When she wasn't fussing, she was curious. But, as Carolyn's grandchild, even foster one, she would be. That had been the second trait the seaman's ghost had noticed in his lady, after her loveliness.

Though her vocabulary was limited yet, Amberly did seem to have mastered how to ask "what?" and "why?", as well as pointing.

"I can see it now; you will grow up to be a reporter, like my dear lady," the Captain sighed. "All we need now is for you to get down how, where, and who." He favored her with what was intended to be a stern glare. "You will not work for any -" he paused. What could he call Finley that was appropriate to say around a lady that young? "Any - not very nice or bright person named Finley."

It quickly became clear that the seaman might as well give up and simply be a grandfather for the day. Work was not going to be accomplished.

Shaking his head, Daniel noted wryly, "You are hardly the first young lady to demand my undivided attention."

Promptly, Amberly began to sob uncontrollably. "You are the first to react thusly upon learning she has it," he went on with a frown. "Those blasted teeth, eh?" Gently, the Captain lifted her from the playpen that he'd set up in the middle of the living room and sat down in Carolyn's rocker. Racking his brain, the spirit recalled that when Jonathan and Candy had been much younger and fallen ill, something about poetry had been soothing to them.

"You might be a bit young for Coleridge, but I'm sure in a few years, you will appreciate it," Daniel mused, rocking the girl. "After all, you are clearly brighter than Claymore." So saying, he began to go through his repertoire of poetry. Wynken, Blinken, and Nod did little to soothe Amberly, so he moved on to the Merman's Lament, the Owl and the Pussycat, and a few Psalms when she got the hiccups from crying.

By his feet, Dakota, Tribble, and D.C. stared up at the pair with pathetic canine and feline eyes.

The Captain returned their gazes stoically. "If you have any suggestions, speak up then." He considered summoning help. Tristan had been drafted to drive Thom to the doctor for a check-up to see if he could return to work, and Siegfried had commandeered any remaining time the lad had to effect some badly needed repairs at Bronwyn's theatre apartments. Bronwyn would be supervising the two and trying to keep the brothers from re-killing each other. Dash had said he had something important to do, though Daniel was not sure what it was. Somehow, he could not see Fontenot as being helpful in the matter of soothing a troubled baby. Sean and Molly were Amberly's godparents, but to be quite honest, he wanted to handle things on his own, without assistance. Besides, he thought one of them was monitoring the doctor's office. But, if he was unable to do anything to ease her pain, then Daniel would put his pride on ice.

Ice. That might soothe her sore gums. The ghost placed Amberly back in the playpen, then went to the kitchen to see about something cold for her to chew on. As he did so, Daniel noted the clock. It was nearly noon, much to his surprise. The little one might need something more than ice. Slightly abashed, he located the supply of baby friendly foods Martha made sure were kept in good supply at Gull Cottage. Then, he remembered there might be another matter to attend to, and checked on the diaper status. Once that was dealt with, the Captain returned preparing lunch, recalling Martha had once dryly warned him never to give the child spaghetti, not with sauce in any case, unless he wanted to clean the kitchen. He wondered if it was Jonathan or Candy who had once upon a time incited the woman to create that rule. With that in mind, Daniel pulled together what seemed to be a safe repast of oatmeal with bananas and applesauce.

After lunch, he hoped she would nap, but the meal gave her energy. Now, Amberly wanted to play.

As much as Captain Gregg loved his near grandchild, it was becoming a long day.

XXX

Once Thom and Tristan were safely loaded into the car, Dashire was alone, except for B.J., Candy and Thom's young dog, who was having his first nap of the day. He probably should see how his Captain was doing on his first solo baby-sitting detail, however, Dash needed to do something else.

He needed to make peace with his past.

Though technically, as a ghost, Lord Dashire had no need of rooms, Candy and Thom had gladly agreed when he had asked for two on the topmost floor. Once upon a time, he and Aislynn had shared one of them and used the second as a dressing room. It was in the latter that he spent most of his solitary time or went when he needed to trance. As to the other, he just hadn't been able to either use or allow anyone else to use it decades. Though dusty, it was still neat, untouched, rather like Rebecca de Winter's wing of Manderly, he supposed. Dash lifted one brow at the thought. If that had occurred to him before, he would have done something useful with the space before now. Mrs. Danvers was not his role model by any stretch of the imagination.

Right on time, as always, a soft voice intoned.

Dash jumped, despite himself. It was familiar, but surely... No, she could not have spent the last ninety years hiding in this one room.

Of course not, Charles. Don't be silly. When I died, after I was sent to the light, I was sent back to this specific moment in time. I only just arrived. I take it that it's been somewhat longer, for you. Yes, you are looking much better than when I saw you last.

Now, he could see her, a young woman as translucent as a hologram, resting on the window seat, and someone well known to him.

"Aislynn?" he whispered. At least a thousand questions rushed through his mind.

She nodded. Her words came again to his mind. I am not a ghost, in the way you are. After I left my body, a voice told me to come here, to wait for a moment. There was a rush of - information, scenes of your life, and afterlife, and of the children's lives, after I - died. I have no idea how I comprehended it all in only a second. I have managed to sort out that our grandchildren are not overly fond of you, Charles. In her tone, there was a mild reproof.

"Ha. The little blighters wanted to turn me out and turn our home into - a tourist trap at best, or raze it. I-" he broke off. Ranting about issues that were settled was not the way to spend time with the woman he had married.

Dash felt a touch of joy at seeing her, but coupled with it was an icy feeling. He had changed, and just was not sure that she fit in his life anymore. Or afterlife, whatever. On top of that was the thought of- How do I tell Lynne about her being back?

You don't need to tell her at all, Charles-

"Fine for you to say- you aren't the one who would have to break up with her, to use a modern term," he snapped. "I couldn't - er- not date her and be married to you at once! I'm not Robert Muir!"

Aislynn's shade frowned. She appeared to be listening to something. I wasn't implying you were, and you do not need to "break up" with anyone. I'm not staying. That's the whole point. There was something like a sigh whispered in his mind. Charles, you were much smarter than this when we were alive. I told you, I am not a ghost in the sense you are. I'm simply here for a minute or two of your time to ask you to let me go. You are still in the world, but I am not. You are free to love again, just as she is. Now, why did I say that? She who?

"Lynne, Linden, is a widow."

Is her husband a ghost?

Mutely, Dash shook his head, adding, "I do not think so. Aislynn, what is it like - being - more dead than I?"

Charles, I can't explain. For one thing, you have no context to understand, and another, I- I am not all the way to where I will be. So, I do not completely know. I can't move on into His Kingdom until you release me, dear one.

Dash looked thunderstruck. "I never meant to cause you harm, to hold you back from- from anything. I just- missed you."

Sadly, Aislynn smiled. Of course you were not malicious. I know that, and as I say, I skipped forward in time. How can I explain being somewhere that is not bound to chronology? You will know, one day, but until then, Charles, you have a- well, life isn't quite the word- but I trust you to comprehend what I mean. Her brow lifted. She had never been able to do that when she lived.

Dash nodded.

Linden, is she -- ? Aislynn trailed off, asking a hundred things left unsaid.

"Quite," Dash smiled. "Pretty, no, not the right word, for her. But, very attractive, in spirit and looks. Good sense of humor, though it can be biting. Entirely too smart. And, she is kind, under her bluster."

Aislynn nodded. Not dating? Charles, whatever does that mean. You can not - not date - her? It has been quite a while since my school days, but that is poor grammar.

He laughed. "It- neither of us is- or has been- ready to date...so we- not date, regularly."

The specter shook her head. She is good for you, Charles. Better than I, do not argue. It's rude. She rose, favoring him with a fond, sad gaze. You have let me go, darling, all you need do is admit it. I think I shall soon be seeing our children. Joy and tears mingled in her eyes. Oh, I'll be able to see our son, the one we never met! And the grandchild that was lost at birth. Hurry. I so want to see them again.

"I never could deny you anything, Ash," Dashire sighed. "Give them my love." He watched to see if she was annoyed at his abbreviation of her name. It had taken him some time to learn how to pronounce Aislynn in life. She seemed inclined to ignore, for once.

There was a cool brush against his cheek. He fancied that was what an ethereal ghost's touch felt like to a human.

Goodbye, dear Charles. Be happy.

White light blinded him, and Dash was alone again. He wasn't sure it had even happened, but it seemed that something in his heart had shifted, rearranging things inside so that two people were now in their right spots.

Finally. He had seldom been so happy, or so sad.

XXX

Captain Gregg's spate of peace and quiet did not last long. After an hour or so's worth of nap, Amberly was up and ready for action, again. She was at the stage where she could take steps, and so wanted to walk around. Dakota and her two kittens viewed this with wariness. Daniel knew that neither the child nor the pets would deliberately hurt one another, but accidents could happen. He remained on guard until the little girl began to tune up again. After checking to make sure there was no other reason, the ghost concluded that her mouth was in pain.

Nothing seemed to soothe her; not ice, not a chilled pacifier, nor rocking. Her favorite Pooh bear was of no help either.

"You miss your mother, I expect," Daniel sighed. "I'm rather missing her now, myself. Not to mention your grandmother."

At the sound of his voice, she calmed, albeit only a fraction. Remembering that reading to her had indeed helped somewhat earlier, Daniel gathered her into his arms and took a seat in Carolyn's rocker. He glanced at the clock. Three. It should not be overly long now until his lady was home. His own energy was starting to flag. He needed Amberly to quiet down so he could recharge.

"Have I ever told you about Algae?" he asked. "It's a perfect story for you. One day, your Aunt Candy and Uncle Jon, when they were much smaller, of course, found a seal on the beach, the one right outside Gull Cottage..."

As his low voice rumbled on, the girl grew more peaceful. As the story ended, Daniel quoted the song that Doctor Doolittle had sung in that movie the children loved. He'd have to see about getting those books for her, perhaps for Baby Pierce as well. Then, as he realized she was completely still, almost dozing, he recited Kipling.

Seal Lullaby

Oh! hush thee my baby, the night is behind us;

And black are the waters that sparkled so green;

The moon, o'er the combers, looks downward to find us
At rest in the hollows that rustle between.

Where billow meets billow, then soft be thy pillow,
Ah, weary wee flipperling, curl at thy ease!

The storm shall not wake thee, nor shark over- take thee,
Asleep in the arms of the slow-swinging seas!

Shortly after four, the door to Gull Cottage swung open to let Carolyn come in, rolling the kinks out of her shoulders and back as she did so. It had been a terribly long day for her; she hoped it hadn't been horrible for Daniel. If he was okay with the idea, she wanted to offer to keep Amberly, and perhaps Tristan, overnight. Dave and Jenny could use a night alone.

She stopped in her tracks. The animals had met her at the door; where was her captain?

Something told her to move quietly. The writer gingerly eased into the living room where a beautiful sight met her eyes. There, in her rocker, sat Daniel, looking as if he were napping while he tranced, while Amberly lay with her head pillowed on his shoulder, one thumb in her mouth. Blast, she really needed a camera. Carefully, she walked over to gently kiss her husband. Carolyn hated to wake them, but she needed to officially get his permission so she could tell the baby's parents who waited outside.

Blinking, Daniel roused. "Carolyn!" he whispered. "I did not -"

She kissed him again. "You looked - dare I say sweet? How was the day?"

"We got on splendidly. Teeth were a bit of a problem, but she's resting now." Indeed, Amberly still slept. "I hate to wake her." Belatedly, he added, "I am not sweet... but she is."

"Mind a sleep-over?" Carolyn asked in a whisper, thinking as she did, you are so.

"Of course not, my dear."

With a smile, Carolyn nodded and went back to tell Dave he could get his daughter in the morning.

XXX

Near sunset, Dashire appeared in Gull Cottage. "I was wondering if you two would like to go riding?" he asked. "It seems that since a certain lady thespian has become a part of our crew, a certain hyper ghost has spent much less time with his beloved horses. Ergo, they need exercise, and I thought I'd give at least one of them some of it." He noticed the baby was was looking up at him intently from where she was playing with her grandmother. "I see, however, that I'll be riding alone."

Carolyn grinned. "You know, Dash, the stable does have a good number of customers. Sig really doesn't need to give the horses half the amount of attention he does." Inclining her head to one side, she commented, "You look- better, somehow."

Daniel was at the desk, finally working on his charts, and looked up. "My darling, Dash hardly needs any further fuel for his vanity." His friend glared.

"That's not what I meant," Carolyn shook her head. "You look less- burdened. I had never really noticed that you did before, until - you didn't."

Dash shrugged, then bent over to kiss the top of Amberly's head. "Perhaps I am, fair lady. Perhaps, I am. And I didn't know that I needed to be until I wasn't, either. Now, whether the horses need to be ridden or not, I need to ride one. I shall see you later."

He vanished to reappear a moment later miles away at the stable. He found the steed he wanted and took off. Some time later, the nobleman thought he saw someone standing by the fence, watching him. Guided by instinct, he rode over to where the observer leaned against the rails.

"I thought only - phantoms- could materialize out of thoughts," he said, drawing near.

"Did you materialize out of mine, or vice versa?" Lynne half teased.

"Perhaps, both?" Dash smiled. "Ride with me?"

For a moment, she thought about it, then nodded. He moved the horse closer to the fence, then reached over to help her mount. As Dash took her hand, he could see a band of very pale skin on her ring finger. Their eyes met.

Leaning over, she kissed his cheek. "It was time, Charlie."

"For both of us, Doctor," he agreed, kissing her fully on the lips.